Archive for the ‘Just Saying Again’ Category

10/18/2021 If You Live in Maine   Leave a comment

I know that I’ve mentioned the state of Maine many times in this blog but it’s time to tell you a little more about it. I moved here in 1999 from the not-so-great state of Massachusetts. I’ve traveled a lot during my life and lived in a number of states but I have to say out of all them Maine is the best. It’s called America’s “Vacation Land” because it seems like everyone wants to come here in the warm months and enjoy the beaches, the wilderness, the lighthouses, the lobsters and the simpler way of living. With that in mind I thought I’d share with you the following list. As you read each of these entries add these words to the end of each sentence, “You must live in Maine.”

  • If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May . . .
  • If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don’t even work there . . .
  • If you had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number . . .
  • If you measure distance in hours . . .
  • If you know several people who’ve hit a deer or moose more than once . . .
  • If you switched from heat to AC in the same day and then back again . . .
  • If you can drive 75 miles through 2 feet of snow during a blizzard for beer without flinching . . .
  • If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked . . .
  • If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife actually knows how to use them . . .
  • If you design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit . . .
  • If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow . . .
  • If you know all four seasons: almost Winter, Winter, still Winter, and road construction . . .
  • If you have more miles on your snowblower than your car . . .
  • If you find 10° just a little chilly . . .

Well there you have it. Everything you ever want to know about Maine but were afraid to ask. We’re already preparing for winter and since we had such a mild one last year we’re expecting the worst. If you like snow shoveling, ice fishing, skiing, snowmobiling, cross-country skiing, and falling on your ass on a daily basis . . . come spend your winter in Maine.

THE WAY LIFE OUGHT TO BE

Posted October 18, 2021 by Every Useless Thing in Just Saying Again

10/17/2021 Why Does Everyone Hate America?   Leave a comment

I thought the title of this post would get your attention because we as Americans aren’t all that surprised when we hear how much most of the world seems to hate us. People hate us, countries hate us, individuals hate us, and yet millions of them put their lives at risk to escape their own countries to come here. I find that to be a conundrum and it needs to be examined and we’re going to do it right now.

I consider myself to be a proud and patriotic American. That being said I feel that most people on this planet have little or no respect for our country, our people, our culture (if we have one), and our politicians. When Donald Trump was president everybody on the planet including the people in this country had nothing good to say about the man. I’m finding now that Biden has been elected, other countries are already taking potshots at him as are many of our own citizens. He’s too old, he’s crotchety, he can’t remember anything. What the hell are we doing? We hate to be hated but insist on hating others including ourselves. Many of those comments I mentioned were obtained from British television and those folks don’t hold much back when criticizing.

I would gladly tell most of them if asked how little I care about their opinions on America. It’s like when you were in high school and somebody picked on your sister. It’s okay if you do it but no one else better try. I fully understand why the rest of the world shows us such little respect. We are as always our own worst enemy. I won’t even begin to discuss reality programming which makes the entire planet think we’re a bunch of mouth-breathing, arrogant morons. It’s hard to argue that fact when so many millions of Americans are so addicted to watching these staged soap operas that permit idiots to exploit their 15 minutes of fame at our expense. Fake drama, fake plot lines, and generally just a lot of BS.

There is so much weirdness in America these days it boggles the mind. I know by now to expect the absolute worst and when it doesn’t happen, I celebrate. I’d like to send a big shout out to the Media and Hollywood, for producing such crap and broadcasting it worldwide. Without fuel a fire will go out, so people, please stop fueling the damn fire.

I was thinking last night while surfing around the TV network sites, how would a reasonably religious and intelligent person living anywhere on the planet feel about America after watching an hour of TMZ or the host of reality shows clogging the airways.

I know that America and its Americans will continue moving down this road regardless of the consequences. That’s our right as free citizens to be as stupid and unmindful about others as we seem to be. However, we should really stop whining about everyone on the planet hating us. We have to get over that crybaby BS and take the heat for all the stupid crap we continue to do and then transmit it to the rest of the world.

Every time we have one of our wacko celebrities out of the country on tour, they’re seen as representing all of us. That’s about as scary as it gets for me. How about you?

GOD BLESS AMERICA – LOL

10/16/2021 ***Limerick Alert***   Leave a comment

Said a lecherous fellow named Shea,

When his prick would not rise for a lay:

“You must seize it, and squeeze it,

And tease it, and please it.”

Adding: ” Rome wasn’t built in a day!”

10/16/2021 Day Five – Lavatory Trivia   Leave a comment

INTERESTING TOILET FACTS

  • The most impossible item to flush is a ping-pong ball.
  • The first toilet air freshener was a pomegranate stuffed with cloves.
  • Psycho was the first Hollywood film that showed a toilet flushing – thereby generating many complaints.
  • The idea of separate cubicles for toilets is a relatively modern invention; Romans, for example, sat down together in large groups.
  • The town Council of Cheltenham Spa once voted to replace the words Men and Women on their public toilets with Ladies and Gentlemen in order to” attract a better class of person.”
  • Before the invention of toilet paper, people use shells or stones, bunches of herbs or, at best, a bit of sponge attached to a stick, which they rinsed with cold water.
  • Hermann Goring refused to use regulation toilet paper and used to bulk-buy soft white handkerchiefs instead.
  • In 1986, Nathan Hicks of St. Louis, Missouri, shot his brother Herbert dead because he used six toilet rolls in two days.
  • The world’s oldest piece of toilet paper – thought to be 1200 years old – was found buried under an Israeli garage.
  • And last but not least, Elvis Presley, Judy Garland, and Lenny Bruce all died on the toilet.

TOILET QUOTE

“You know that it is by the state of the lavatory that a family is judged.” (Pope John XXIII)

This completes my first Trivia Week. I hope everyone enjoyed this bizarre collection of facts as much as I did collecting them. I may have to do this again in the future because I have many more of these tidbits to share.

TRIVIA RULES

Posted October 16, 2021 by Every Useless Thing in Just Saying Again

10/15/2021 Day Four – Misc. Trivia   Leave a comment

VARIOUS ODD FACTS

  • In 1679, Messrs. Green, Barry and Hill were hanged at Tyburn for a murder they committed at Greenberry Hill.
  • Melanie Griffith has a tattoo of a pear on her butt.
  • And not to be outdone, Anna Kournikova has the tattoo of the sun on her butt.
  • Andrew Jackson (1829-37) once killed a man in a duel because he insulted his wife.
  • John Quincy Adams (1825-29) used to take a swim in the Potomac River every morning naked.
  • Jimi Hendrix lost his virginity at age 12.
  • Mark Twain lost his virginity at age 34.

MARK TWAIN WISDOM

  • “There are several good protections against temptation, but the surest is cowardice.”
  • “Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.”
  • “Education is what you must acquire without any interference from your schooling.”
  • “Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of 80 and gradually approach 18.”
  • “Familiarity breeds contempt . . . and children.”

INSURANCE

  • Dolly Parton insured her breasts for $3 million.
  • Michael Flatley, Lord of the Dance, insured his legs for $40 million.
  • Tina Turner insured her lips for $1 million and her breasts for $750,000.
  • Bruce Springsteen insured his voice for $5 million.
  • Jennifer Lopez insured her entire body for 1 billion dollars.

FYI: I’M INSURING MY RIGHT HAND FOR $10 BILLION

10/14/2021 Day Three – Misc. Trivia   Leave a comment

I know a lot of you celebrity lovers will be interested in the Oscar section, These trivia facts are laced with the names of so-called celebrities just for your enjoyment. Here we go . . .

FIRST, SOME FIRSTS

  • Harry Houdini was the first man to fly a plane in Australia – in 1918.
  • Barbra Streisand’s first performance was as a chocolate chip cookie.
  • Groucho Marx ate his first bagel at the age of 81.
  • The first ready-to-eat breakfast cereal was Shredded Wheat in 1893.
  • Steven Spielberg directed the very first episode of Columbo.
  • Courtney Cox was the first person on U.S. TV ever to use the word period – in an ad for Tampax.

OSCAR INFO

  • The only actress to win an Oscar for less than 10 min. work: Judi Dench, who was on screen for only 8 min. in Shakespeare in Love (1998)
  • The only actress to win a Best Actress Oscar in a foreign language: Sophia Loren for Two Women (1961)
  • The only posthumous acting Oscar was won by: Peter Finch for Network (1976)
  • The only actors to get seven acting nominations without ever winning a single Oscar: Peter O’Toole and Richard Burton

DEATHS

  • Orson Welles and Yule Brenner both died on 10/10/85.
  • The only mother and daughter to be nominated for Oscars in the same year: Diane Ladd and her daughter, Laura Dern, for Rambling Rose (1991)
  • Sammy Davis Junior and Jim Henson both died on 05/16/90.
  • Freddie Mercury and Klaus Kinski both died on 11/24/91.

SO ENDS DAY THREE

10/13/2021 Day Two – Friday 13th   Leave a comment

Are you the superstitious type? If I’m being truthful, I may upon occasion have paid some attention to one or two of the sillier superstitions. I hate to admit that but it’s ingrained into our consciousness about certain things and it can be hard to shake regardless of how stupid it sounds. I’ve never been one to fear the number “13” or Friday the 13th” but I know many people who are. So here is some additional information concerning that mystical number and the day Friday. Enjoy!

  • The fear the number 13 – or ” triskaidekaphobia” as it’s technically known, goes back a long way. Accordingly to Scandinavian mythology, there was a banquet in Valhalla into which Loki (the God of Strife) intruded, thereby making it 13 guests, and where Balder (The God of Light) was murdered. In Christian countries the superstition was confirmed by thirteen people attending the Last Supper.
  • Meanwhile, “Friday the 13th” is considered unlucky because it was the day of the crucifixion and because Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit on a Friday and also died on Friday.
  • Some Buddhists and Brahmins also consider Friday to be unlucky. In combining superstitions about both Friday and the number 13, Friday the 13th is feared as being twice as frightful.
  • Winston Churchill, the former British prime minister, never traveled on a Friday the 13th unless it was absolutely essential.
  • Graham Chapman, the late member of the Monty Python team, actually like Friday the 13th. Indeed, he arranged to be buried on the 13th hour of Friday, October 13, 1989.
  • Good things that have happened on a Friday the 13th include these: The Third Man premiered (January 1950), the Allies recaptured Tobruk (November 1942), and Alfred Dreyfus was restored to the French army and promoted to major (July 1906).
  • Bad things that have happened on a Friday the 13th included these: a violent earthquake in Turkey that killed more than 1000 people (March 1992), a hurricane in Britain left 9 people dead (January 1984), and a plane crash left survivors stranded in the Andes without food and compelled them to turn to cannibalism to stay alive (October 1972).
  • Months that begin on a Sunday will always have a Friday the 13th.
  • People who were born on a Friday the 13th include Steve Buscemi, Zoe Wanamaker, Howard Keel and Christopher Plummer.
  • People who have died on Friday the 13th include Benny Goodman and former U.S. Vice President Hubert Humphrey.

Day 2 of Trivia Week is complete. Be grateful that this weeks Friday falls on the 15th. Your safe until May 13, 2022, then watch out!

HAVE A SAFE UNSUPERSTITIOUS DAY

Posted October 13, 2021 by Every Useless Thing in Just Saying Again

10/12/2021 Day One – Misc. Trivia   Leave a comment

It’s time for another giant pile of flaming and utterly useless information. As you already know I’ve always been a huge fan of trivia thats unusual, odd, or strange. I’ve collected this information from books, e-mails, notes from friends, and anywhere else I could find it. I hope you enjoy them and find them as interesting and fun as I did.

  • New foreskins discarded after circumcision are sold to biomedical companies for use in artificial skin manufacture. They are also used as the secret ingredient in some popular anti-wrinkle gels.
  • Lettuce contains 2 to 10 parts of morphine per billion.
  • To see a rainbow you must have your back to the sun.
  • You can tell the temperature by listening to the chirp of a cricket. For the temperature in degrees Fahrenheit, count the number of chirps in 15 seconds and then add 37.
  • A calorie is the amount of energy it takes to raise the temperature of 1 g of water by 1°C. A gallon of gasoline contains 31,000 K calories, or the equivalent of 46.3 happy meals.
  • Bubblegum is pink because it’s creator Walter Diemer, a Fleer employee, had only pink coloring left when he mixed up his first successful batch.
  • The fly of your jeans is the flap of cloth over the zipper, not the zipper itself.
  • The term cop most likely derives from the British police acronym for Constable On Patrol.
  • There are more Subway sandwich shops in Manhattan than there are actual subway stations.
  • Henry Ford, Robert Fulton, Eli Whitney, and Paul Revere were all clock makers at one point in their lives.
  • When Thomas Edison died in 1941, Henry Ford captured his last breath in a bottle.
  • The first item sold on eBay (then called the auction web) was a broken laser pointer that sold for $14 at the time, more than the cost of a new one.
  • The term “the whole 9 yards” dates from World War II. When fighter pilots armed airplanes, the 50 caliber machine gun ammunition belts loaded into the fuselage measured exactly 27 feet. If a pilot fired all his ammo at one target, it got “the whole 9 yards”.
  • On average, women utter 7000 words a day; men manage just over 2000.

NOW WASN’T DAY 1 FUN?

10/11/2021 ***Limerick Alert***   Leave a comment

There was a young man from Siam,

Who said:” I go in with a wham!

But I soon lose my starch, like the mad month of March,

And the lion comes out like a lamb.”

10/11/2021 Famous Last Words – Part II   Leave a comment

As I promised, here is part two of the “Famous Last Words” list. They don’t need any more of an introduction than that.

“No! I didn’t come here to make a speech. I came here to die.” Crawford Goldsby, a.k.a. Cherokee Bill, when asked if he had anything to say before he was hanged.

“I know you’ve come to kill me. Shoot, you are only going to kill a man.” Che Guevera

“Don’t let it end like this. Tell them I said something.” Francisco (Pancho) Villa

“I’ll be in hell before you start breakfast!” “Black Jack” Ketchum, notorious train robber

“Don’t worry… It’s not loaded…” Terry Kath, rock musician in the band Chicago Transit Authority as he put the gun he was cleaning to his head and pulled the trigger.

“Is someone hurt?” Robert F Kennedy, to his wife directly after he was shot and seconds before he fell into a coma.

“Die, my dear? Why that’s the last thing I’ll do!” Groucho Marx

“Go on, get out! Last words are for fools who haven’t said enough!” Karl Marx, asked by his housekeeper when his last words were to be

“I have a terrific headache.” Franklin Delano Roosevelt, who died of a massive cerebral hemorrhage

“Drink to me!” Pablo Picasso

“I have not told half of what I saw.” Marco Polo, Venetian traveler and writer

“Dammit… Don’t you dare ask God to help me.” Joan Crawford. This comment was directed towards her housekeeper who began to pray aloud.

“Lord help my poor soul.” Edgar Allen Poe

Now that we’ve laid all these so-called celebrities to rest we can move on with our lives. If any of you come up with any epithets or last-words to celebrate your own death, let me know. I have a another post on this subject coming in the near future and I could add yours to the list.

* * * * TRIVIA WEEK COMING SOON * * * *

10/12 – 10/16

All Trivia – All Week

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