I’ve heard the word hate used many times in my life and more often in recent years by some politicians. I actually was guilty of it a few times myself and it always bothered me after the fact. Not so much that I actually hated someone but that I really didn’t understand the effect my words were having on others.

I hate you! The terrorists hate us! He’s a left-wing hater! She’s a right-wing hater! We are bombarded daily with the “H” word because it’s used so casually by so many in politics and the media. They use it strictly for shock value and never think about how it sounds to us. I take that back. I really don’t think they care at all what we think, they just want to influence our vote.

Have you ever used the word in a fit of anger to a loved one? After you screamed at them, then calmed down, did you seriously think about what you said and regretted it? Did you ever tell that person you really didn’t mean it? I’m guilty of all of that unfortunately.

As a teenager I said it a few times to relatives and friends in anger and never apologized to them. I thought it was all forgotten and forgiven. Many years later I found out just how wrong I was. It seems that the word itself causes a visceral reaction in most people. A close friend of mine became the victim of my bad temper causing us to become estranged for a number of years. He eventually became my best man and at my bachelor party we drank a bit too much and ended up sitting on the porch steps and reminiscing. He explained to me just how much I’d hurt him all those years ago and how he thought about that argument often. I felt like a real ass because it never occurred to me what kind of damage a few simple words could do when I really didn’t mean them. Ten years of hurt feelings could have been easily eliminated if I had just picked my words more carefully.

I guess the moral to my story is this; if you happen to say something In the heat of the moment, always remember to clear the air before moving on. It could cost you dearly. Here are a few quotes I collected concerning the word and the meaning of hate:

From the deepest desires often come the deadliest hate. Socrates

The price of hating other human beings is loving one’s self less. Eldridge Cleaver

End discrimination. Hate everybody. Anonymous

I imagine one of the reasons people cling to their hate so stubbornly is because they sense, once hate is gone… they will be forced to deal with the pain. James Arthur Baldwin

I will permit no man to narrow and degrade My Soul by making me hate him. Booker T. Washington

The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them; that’s the essence of inhumanity. George Bernard Shaw

Darkness cannot drive out Darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. Martin Luther King Jr.

Hate is the consequence of fear; we fear something before we hated; a child who fears noises becomes a man who hates noise. Cyril Connolly

Always remember others may hate you but those who hate you don’t win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself. Richard M. Nixon

Hating people is like burning down your own house to get rid of a rat. Henry Emerson Fosdick

I love you, and because I love you, I would sooner have you hate me for telling you the truth than adore me for telling you lies. Pietro Arentino

So there you have it. Simple words can do damage. Be careful when throwing them around in the heat of the moment, you might just lose a good friend or loved one forever.