Archive for the ‘Education’ Category

01/28/2023 💥💥💥Limerick Alert💥💥💥   Leave a comment

I thought I’d introduce you to something new today. I’ve posted hundreds of limericks over the years, and they were all basically the five-line standard. Another style of limerick is the extended limerick which are a bit longer than you normally see and more challenging to write. Here are two samples:

By Anonymous

There once were two cats of Kilkenny.

Each thought there was one too many,

So, they quarreled and fit,

They scratched and they bit,

Till, excepting their nails

And the tips of their tails,

Instead of two cats, there weren’t any!

😛😛😛

By Anonymous

There was a strange student from Yale.

Who put himself outside the pale.

Said the judge:” Please refrain,

When passing through Maine,

From exposing yourself in in the train,

Or you’ll just have to do it in jail!”

😗😗😗

In my opinion they aren’t as exciting as a normal limerick, but many people disagree. Now let’s take a look at what’s called a prose limerick. It’s a totally different style but I enjoy these very much because of the narrative way they are written.

By Anonymous

When cars are left here for repair, our charges are modest and fair. And

owners may rest quite content that we test all work that is done with great care.

😊😊😊

In the shed at the end of the mews there’s a bucket of old bolts and screws, and

right at the back you will see a large stack of old junk that perhaps you can use.

🤩🤩🤩

The train that was due to depart at 8:10 is not likely to start. We’re

working to rule, you’d best get a mule or a bike or a horse and a cart.

***

TRY WRITING A FEW OF YOUR OWN

01/26/2023 An Unexamined Life #8   Leave a comment

Installment eight continues this series of posts designed to promote discussion and thought through self-examination. I hope it’ll generate some interesting discussions between you, your friends, and partners. Without interesting people in our lives and a lack of interesting conversations things would become excruciatingly boring.

Also, for those of you who are interested, starting today this blog will no longer be posted daily. I’ve decided to cut back a little to allow for more time for other projects. It’s been more than twelve years of daily postings and I’ll miss that part of my routine. I’m immediately cutting back to three postings a week, Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays beginning today. Now let’s get on with Self-Examination #8.

“The unexamined life is not worth living.” Socrates

*****

  • Do you usually make a special effort to thank someone who does you a favor? How do you react when you aren’t thanked for going out of your way for someone?
  • Would you like to have your rate of physical aging slowed by a factor of thirty so as to give you a life expectancy of approximately 2000 years?
  • You are invited to a party that will be attended by many fascinating people you’ve never met. Would you want to go if you had to go by yourself?
  • Since adolescence, in what three-year period do you feel you experienced the most personal growth and change?
  • If you were having difficulty on an important test and could safely cheat by looking at someone else’s paper, would you do so?

*****

  • If your parents became infirm and the only alternative to bringing them into your house was to put them in a nursing home, would you do so? What about a sister or brother who suffered a permanently crippling injury and had nowhere to go?
  • If you were at a friend’s house for Thanksgiving dinner and you found a dead cockroach in your salad, what would you do?
  • If you could take a one-month trip to anywhere in the world and money were not a consideration, where would you go and what would you do?
  • Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by five years to become extremely attractive?
  • Given the ability to project yourself into the past but not return, would you do so? Where would you go and what would you try to accomplish if you knew you might change the course of history?

*****

  • How many different sexual partners have you had in your life? Would you prefer to have had more or fewer?
  • Have you ever considered suicide? What is so important to you that without it life would not be worth living?
  • If your friends and acquaintances were willing to bluntly and honestly tell you what they really thought of you, would you want them to?
  • If this country were to suffer an unprovoked nuclear attack and would be totally obliterated in a matter of minutes, would you favor unleashing the US nuclear arsenal upon the attackers?
  • Would you accept $10,000 to shave your head and continue your normal activities without hat or wig without explaining the reason for the new haircut?

*****

ENJOY YOUR DAY

01/25/2023 “War-What Is It Good For?”   2 comments

I’m a former vet who proudly served. Since then, I’ve maintained an interest in all things military. As much as all of the new high-tech equipment is interesting, I still lean towards the past history of wars and warfare. It’s always good to know all of the small details of warfare to give you an accurate picture of why wars occurred and what steps had to be taken to end them.

  • The Spartans used a staff and a coil of paper to keep military messages from being decoded if they fell into the hands of the enemy. Rolled around the staff, the words fit together and made sense. Unrolled, the paper was covered with gibberish. Each general had a carefully guarded staff of precisely the same diameter around which to roll the paper and read the message.
  • During World War II, the Federal Bureau of investigation secretly established a house of male prostitution in New York’s Greenwich Village. The house staffed multilingual agents for the purpose of extracting import shipping information from foreign sailors. The FBI later claimed it had been a very successful operation.
  • By the end of World War II, there wasn’t a German spy in Great Britain who was not under British control. All either were cooperating with the British while maintaining their German “alliance” or had been caught and “turned around”.
  • During World War II, the United States Navy had a world champion chess player, Reuben Fine, calculate on the basis of positional probability where enemy submarines might surface. Dr. Fine said, it worked out all right.
  • The Federal Bureau of Investigation captured eight German saboteurs shortly after they came ashore from a U-boat off eastern Long Island in 1942. Six were executed and two imprisoned. It turns out that one of those imprisoned, the expedition’s leader, was an anti-Nazi and had tipped off the FBI. He was promised that he be jailed for only six months, but he got instead, a 90-year prison term.
  • Bismarck tricked the French into the Franco-Prussian War by altering a telegram from the King of Prussia. He struck out the king’s consolatory words, so that the telegram sounded belligerent. The result was what the Iron Chancellor had intended, a French declaration of war, followed by a German victory.
  • Mata Hari, the Dutch-Javanese dancer who became the most famous spy of World War I, ordered that a suit be especially tailored for her for the occasion of her execution by a French firing squad. She also wore a new pair of white gloves.

WAR IS HELL, BUT PEACETIME IS A MOTHER F**KER

01/24/2023 “Word Play”   Leave a comment

The snow has finally stopped here in Maine, and I just finished blowing my driveway clear for the fourth time since yesterday afternoon. I sure hope that we get a break before the next one hits. Maybe the next storm will hold off long enough for my bruised ass cheeks to heal. I’m crossing my fingers . . .

How about a little fun wordplay today. I’ve always loved palindromes and here are a few of my favorites:

NO LEMONS, NOMELON

STEP ON NO PETS

ED IS LOOPY POOLSIDE

MADAM, I’M ADAM

RATS LIVE ON NO EVIL STAR

How are you with tongue twisters? The rumor that women can say them better than men just might be true.

SAM SHAVED SEVEN SHY SHEEP

NAT’S KNAPSACK STRAP SNAPPED

A PROPER COPPER COFFEE POT

FRED’S FRIEND FRAN FLIPS FINE FLAPJACKS FAST

A SKUNK SAT ON A STUMP.

THE STUMP THUNK THE SKUNK STUNK

THE SKUNK THUNK THE STUMP STUNK

Here are a few words that have faded from use, and you’ll see why. Do you still use any of them or know someone who does?

BEES KNEES – “cool”.

BESOT – “give”

SHAN’T – “will not”

THITHER – “over there”

ZOUNDS – “surprise”

EWER – “water pitcher”

DAPPER – “fancy dresser”

If you want to have some fun, use a few of these words when speaking or texting your friends.

01/23/2023 🌨️Winter Is Finally Here🌨️   3 comments

Living in northern New England requires a certain amount of love for snow. Skiers, skaters, snow boarders, and sledders love it here. Unfortunately, I’m none of those. I’m too clumsy for any winter sports. My favorite winter sport consists of a comfortable stool in a comfortable bar with a huge picture window looking out at the bottom of the ski run. The only way I could be injured under those circumstances is if some amateur skier loses control, crashes through the window, and knocks me off my stool. I can’t be too careful around here with all these snow bunnies and snow freaks running loose among us. I was up this morning a 4:30 am snow blowing my driveway. I just came in from the second trip because this damn snow just keeps falling. I thought I’d pass along some weather-related trivia to save me from losing my mind.

  • New Hampshire’s Mount Washington, located just a stone’s throw from this house is only 6288 feet in altitude, is often considered to have the worst weather in the world. The highest wind velocity ever recorded on Earth, 231 mi./h, swept across the summit of Mount Washington in April of 1934. More than 30 people have died there as a result of sudden changes in the weather.
  • Continental snow cover would advance to the equator, and the oceans would eventually freeze, if there were a permanent drop of just 1.6% to 2% in energy reaching the earth.
  • Because air is denser in cold weather, a wind of the same speed exerts 25% more force during the winter than it does during the summer.
  • Gigantic snowfalls may be crippling to big cities, but at least in New York City they have a tendency to fall mainly on the day’s most convenient for the urban population. A study of the biggest snows in the last 68 years shows that 54% of them fall on a Friday or Sunday when the cleanup can be accomplished with minimal inconvenience to those millions who must go to work and school.
  • In 1816, there was no summer in many areas of the world. In parts of New England, snow stayed on the ground all year. Crops there and in Europe were ruined. Volcanic dust from the eruption of Tomboro in Indonesia blocked the rays of the sun and was blamed for the unusual weather as well as for the red and brown snow that fell in the United States, Hungary, and Italy.

I’d love to chat A little more, but Mother Nature insists on filling my driveway with more snow. I’ll be snow blowing a few more times before this day is over.

MOTHER NATURE SUCKS!

01/22/2023 💥💥Nurse Limerick Alert💥💥   Leave a comment

I dedicate these limericks to all of the nurses I’ve known in my life and there’ve been a few. If there was ever a group that enjoyed naughty and lewd limericks, it’s them. Enjoy, all of you so-called nurse lovers.

🍆🍆🍆

An amorous writer of versus,

Was especially enamored of nurses.

But he found each advance.

In pursuit of romance

Met only with starchy reverses.

😷😷😷

A rosy cheeked nurse, from Dunellen,

Whom the Hoboken sailors called Helen,

In her efforts to please

Has spread social disease,

From New York to the Straits of Magellan!

🤕🤕🤕

There was a young nurse named Prentice,

Who had an affair with a dentist.

To make things easier,

He used anesthesia,

And diddled her, non-compos mentis.

🚑🚑🚑

An unfortunate nurse named Randall,

Hs the clap such as doctors can’t handle.

So, this forlorn young floozy

With her poor damaged coosie,

Must resume her delight with a candle.

🦽🦽🦽

A virginal nurse name of Lynne,

Shouted thus just before she gave in.

“It isn’t the deed,

Or the fear of the seed,

But that big worm that shedding its skin!”

❤️❤️❤️

WHO DOESN’T LIKE THE OCCASIONAL NURSE

LOL

01/20/2023 😷Medical Trivia😷   3 comments

I’ve spent the last three years of my life immersed in our medical systems and believe me I’m not complaining. Our healthcare systems are almost certainly overpriced but since they’ve kept me alive for the last three years, I don’t mind so much. Another plus for me is that I’ve had more time than I ever thought possible to read and digest ten tons of medical jargon and terminology. Am I any smarter? Probably not, but I picked up a boatload of trivia and useless information that I feel obligated to pass onto you. Here are some facts you probably never wanted to know but what the hell, here they are anyway

Did You Know . . .

  • There are more than 2 million sweat glands (estimated 2,381,248) on the skin of an average human, according to Gray’s anatomy.
  • The technical name for a human armpit is the axilla.
  • If you ever see a human being with uncontrollable winking of the eyes, they are exhibiting symptoms of blepharospasms.
  • The only bone in the human body that is not connected to another bone is in the throat, at the back of the tongue. It is a horseshoe shaped bone called the hyoid.
  • The largest organ in the human body by weight are the lungs. Together they weigh approximately 42 ounces. The right lung is 2 ounces heavier than the left, and the lungs of males are heavier than the female.

  • Could you find your buccal cavity? It’s not a trick question, that is the terminology used for the inside of your mouth.
  • Were you aware that the epidermis, the outer layer of skin, replaces itself every four weeks.
  • The kidney was the first organ ever transplanted. The operation was by Dr. Richard H Lawler in 1956. His patient Ruth Tucker, lived for five years with her new kidney.
  • Did you know there are approximately 45 miles of nerves in the adult human body?
  • The average lifespan of a human being’s tastebud is from 7 to 10 days.

HUMAN BODY’S ARE AMAZING – THE PEOPLE UNFORTUNEATELY ARE NOT

01/19/23 An Examined Life #7   Leave a comment

“The unexamined life is not worth living.” Socrates

*****

Welcome to installment number seven. These questions appear a little harder to answer simply. Only a frank discussion will bring the answers, both good and bad. Have fun . . .

  • Would you rather play a game with someone more or less talented as you? Would it matter who’s watching?
  • Is there something you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?
  • While in the government, you discover the President is committing extortion and other serious crimes. By exposing the situation, you might bring about the President’s downfall, but your career would be destroyed because you would be framed, fired, and suffer public humiliation on other matters. Knowing you would be vindicated five years later; would you blow the whistle? What if you knew you would never be vindicated?
  • On a busy street you are approached apologetically by a well-dressed stranger who asks for a dollar to catch a bus and make a phone call. He says he has lost his wallet. What would you do? If approached in the same way by a haggard looking stranger claiming to be hungry and unable to find a job, what would you do?
  • If by sacrificing your life you could contribute so much to the world that you would be honored in all nations, would you be willing to do so? If so, would you make the same sacrifice knowing that someone you thoroughly disliked would receive the honor while you went unrecognized?

*****

  • Knowing you had a 50% chance of winning and would be paid 10 times the amount of your bet if you won, what fraction of what you now own would you be willing to wager?
  • What are your most compulsive habits? Do you regularly struggled to break these habits?
  • You know you will die of an incurable disease within three months. Would you allow yourself to be frozen within the week if you knew it would give you a modest chance of being revived in 1000 years and living a greatly extended life?
  • You are driving late at night in a safe but deserted neighborhood when a dog suddenly darts in front of your car. Though you slam on the brakes, you hit the animal. Would you stop to see how injured the animal was? If you did so and found that the dog was dead but had a name tag, would you contact the owner?
  • What do you most strive for in your life: accomplishment, security, love, power, excitement, knowledge, or something else?

*****

  • An eccentric millionaire offers to donate a large sum to charity if you will step completely naked from a car onto a busy downtown street, walk four blocks, and climb back into the car. Knowing that there would be no danger of physical abuse, would you do it?
  • How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people?
  • Is the fact that you have never done something before increase or decrease its appeal to you?
  • Would you be willing to give up sex for five years if you could have wonderfully sensual and erotic dreams any night you wished?
  • At a meal, your friends start belittling a common acquaintance. If you felt their criticisms were unjustified, would you defend the person?

*****

THE QUESTIONS KEEP GETTING MORE INTERESTING

01/18/2023 🎥Hollywood History🎥   Leave a comment

I thought I’d pander to my readership today since so many of you love information about celebrities and Hollywood and blah, blah, blah. I won’t be writing too much on the current list of celebrities that everyone seems to adore but will step back into the near past for some actual interesting trivia. I don’t care who they’re currently dating, I don’t care what they have to say about anything, and least of all who they might or might not be sleeping with. I find historical trivia when it comes to the Entertainment industry much more interesting. Here we go . . .

  • The American chemist Robert Hare discovered that a blow pipe flame acting upon a block of calcium oxide, which is lime, produces a brilliant white light that can be used to illuminate theater stages. We speak of someone who faces the glare of publicity as being in the “limelight”.
  • In the mid-1960’s, the motion picture director-producer Stanley Kubrick wanted from Lloyds of London an insurance policy protecting against losses should extraterrestrial intelligences be discovered before completion and release of his far-out motion picture 2001: A Space Odyssey. Lloyds declined.
  • By 1929, two years after the introduction of the “talkies”, motion pictures in the United States were attracting 100 million patrons every week.
  • Northwestern University once conferred an honorary degree on a dummy of the wooden variety. On ventriloquist Edgar Bergen’s dummy, Charlie McCarthy.
  • The English indirectly owe the preservation of Shakespeare’s birthplace to P. T. Barnum. In 1850’s, the Stratford-on-Avon cottage was neglected, and Barnum began to negotiate to acquire the house and have it shipped to his museum. The English were horrified and banded together to buy it and turned it into a national monument.

  • In the 1920’s and 1930’s, Charlie Chaplin was probably the most celebrated man in the world. During a visit to his native London, the motion picture comedian received 73,000 letters in just two days.
  • Acting was once considered so frivolous an occupation that authorities in Virginia, in 1610, forbade immigration of actors from England. Because of the evils that were thought to be associated with the craft, the cast of the first English play in colonial America in 1665 was arrested in Virginia, but later acquitted.
  • The stellar cataclysm in the motion picture 2001: A Space Odyssey was filmed by Stanley Kubrick in an abandoned corset factory in New York City. The cataclysm was a close-up shot of paint dripping in a bucket.
  • There are songs in all of Shakespeare’s plays except for Comedy of Errors. That play was the basis for a Broadway musical in 1938 that won the Pulitzer Prize: The Boys from Syracuse, by Richard Rogers and Larry Hart.
  • In 1957, Frank Sinatra was quoted as describing “rock-and-roll” as “funny and false and written and played for the most part by cretinous goons”. But when Elvis Presley finished his Army stint three or so years later, Sinatra paid him $125,000 to appear for 6 minutes on a television special.

GOTTA LOVE HOLLYWOOD . . . RIGHT?

01/17/2023 🏀Sports Limerick Alert🏈   Leave a comment

I’m getting a late start today due primarily to my better-half and her shopping safari. I also just have to mention that wicked and evil nurse who sucked six tubes of blood from me earlier. Truthfully having the blood drawn was way less painful than being the assistant to the shopping fanatic.

All I’ve been hearing for the last few days is football, football, and more football. While I am a fan, it’s becoming a bit much even for me. Today’s limericks are sports related but I’m an equal opportunity spreader of humor. I’ll try for a few that aren’t about football.

⚾⚾⚾

BASEBALL

A batter named Fatty McPhatter,

Had the gift of the gab with his patter.

“Whichever pitch comes,

I hit only home runs –

So, the fact that I’m fat doesn’t matter!”

⚾⚾⚾

The slider just slid past the bag,

And the curveball? Too flat to get at.

The pitcher’s last ball

Was his fastest fastball.

So, I’m three-strikes-and-out. And that’s that.

⛳⛳⛳

GOLF

Golf is a four-letter word.

For a game that is clearly absurd.

Unless what you like

Is a long boring hike,

Dressed up like a half-witted nerd.

⛳⛳⛳

They say that ex-president Taft,

When hit by a golf ball, just laughed,

And said: “I’m not sore,

But although he called “Fore!”

The place where it struck him was aft!

HAPPY NO EFF’ING FOOTBALL TUESDAY

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