Archive for the ‘Education’ Category

10/04/2022 “Weather   Leave a comment

Living in Maine has given me a great appreciation for monitoring the weather. Our winter here starts in late October and extends itself to the end of April, a full six months of snow, sleet, and cold. If you’re not a lover of miserable weather, I recommend you never move here. Today’s posting contains random weather tidbits you haven’t likely heard before. Enjoy!

  • Lightning strikes the earth of hundred times every second, from the 1800 thunderstorms in progress at any given moment.
  • Rain contains vitamin B-12.
  • Observations of increased rain after US Civil War battles led to abortive experiments with weather control. Cannon volleys were fired into the clouds in order to induce rain.
  • Nearly 100 pollution-filled, weather-beaten years in New York have done more damage to Cleopatra’s Needle – a granite obelisk covered with hieroglyphics – than did 3500 arid years in Egypt.
  • 17 1/2 inches in circumference and 1.67 pounds in weight: that’s the size of the largest hailstone known to have fallen in the United States. It struck during a severe storm at Coffeyville, Kansas, in September of 1970.

  • In 1816, there was no summer in many areas of the world. In parts of New England, snow stayed on the ground all year. Crops there and in Europe were ruined. Volcanic dust from the corruption of Tomboro in Indonesia that blocked the rays of the sun has been blamed.
  • In living memory, it was not until February 18, 1979, that snow fell on the Sahara Desert. A half-hour storm in southern Algeria stopped traffic but within a few hours all of the snow had melted away.
  • Residents in a small village in Scotland schedule their television viewing according to the tides. At low tide, the nearby mudflats absorbed the broadcast “waves”. Thank God for cable.
  • On June 10, 1958, a tornado was crashing through El Dorado, Kansas. The storm pulled a woman out of her house and carried her 60 feet away. She landed, relatively unharmed, next to a phonograph record titled “Stormy Weather”.
  • Due to friction with the surface of the planet, the wind retards or accelerates the spin of the Earth very slightly. A peak in the seasonal slowing of the planet is most evident during the northern winter.

C’MON WINTER

10/02/2022 “Toilet History”   Leave a comment

Always wishing to keep this blog interesting I decided that a short review of the “toilet” needs to be told. It’s an important part of our everyday lives but very few people care to hear anything about it. I’ll do the best I can with the information I’ve been able to find.

  • Before the invention of toilet paper, people use shells or stones, bunches of herbs or, at best, a bit of sponge attached to a stick, which they rinsed with cold water.
  • A Victorian plumber, Thomas Crapper, perfected the system we all use today. The siphon flush which by drawing water uphill through a sealed cistern is both effective and hygienic.
  • In Victorian times, toilet seats were always made of wood. The well-to-do set on mahogany or walnut, while the poor put up with untreated white pine.
  • The idea of separate cubicles for toilets is a relatively modern invention. The Romans, for example, sat down together in large groups.
  • The first toilet air freshener was a pomegranate stuffed with cloves.

  • American civil servants’ paychecks are recycled to make toilet rolls.
  • The most impossible item to flush is a ping-pong ball.
  • The movie Psycho was the first Hollywood film that showed a toilet flushing – thereby generating many complaints.
  • Julia Roberts was once asked for an autograph while she was on the john. She said, ” I’m the tiniest bit busy.”
  • Actor Jack Nicholson has a dead rattlesnake embedded in the clear plastic seat of his toilet.

And one last quote from a member of British royalty. “The biggest waste of water in the country by far. You spend half a pint and flush 2 gallons.”(Prince Philip in a 1965 speech)

NEVER FORGET THE COURTESY FLUSH

09/30/2022 “Fall”   1 comment

With September already over and cold temperatures beginning, it’s time to have some fun before the snow starts flying. With the holidays approaching I thought I’d publish a revised version of the Worker’s Prayer. This is posted for all of those people (my better-half included) that are stuck in thankless retail jobs across the country.

The Worker’s Prayer

“Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill today because they pissed me off, and also help me to be careful of the toes I step on today, as they may be connected to the ass I may have to kiss tomorrow.”

And just for the hell of it I decided to author a haiku as requested by a friend. Here it is.

❀️

The sky is so blue

A dot of sunshine yellow.

Forget me never.

T.G.I.F.

09/29/2022 πŸŽ‡Kid’s LimericksπŸŽ‡   Leave a comment

Here are a few cute limericks, some are written by kids and others written for kids. I hope you enjoy them.

By Colin McNaughton

Should a beast ever hunt you and find you,

He’d certainly crush you and grind you.

But here’s nothing to fear,

There are none around here,

GOOD HEAVENS! THERE’S ONE

RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!

😊😊😊

By Reg Lynes

I’ve eaten as much as I can,

I cannot digest one more gram.

I’m leaving the chips,

And the salady bits,

And the peas, and the eggs, and the ham.

πŸ₯°πŸ₯°πŸ₯°

By Margaret Brace

Archeologists dig at their leisure,

And it gives them a great deal of pleasure,

Not to mention bad backs,

As they fill up their sacks

With all sorts of muddy old treasure.

😜😜😜

By Amanda Chew

There was a young cannibal, Ned,

Who used to eat onions in bed.

His mother said “Sonny,

It’s not very funny –

Why don’t you just eat people instead?”

😏😏😏

ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE

09/27/2022 “The Royals”   3 comments

Are you a follower of all things “Royal”? With the passing of Elizabeth, I thought it was only right and respectful to wait a period of time before I decided to jump into the vast emptiness that all of the Brits are probably suffering from. I’ve never understood the need for “Royals” but nevertheless here are a number of items of trivia you might find interesting about them.

  • Elizabeth was born on Wednesday or “hump day” if you prefer.
  • The Queen always wrote with a fountain pen that belonged to her father, King George VI.
  • Her husband Prince Philip once crashed his car within minutes of having delivered a speech on road safety in 1957.
  • Prince Charles first Shetland pony was named Fum.
  • Prince Andrew refused to wear shorts under his kilt as a child to be like Prince Philip. “Papa doesn’t wear anything and neither shall I!” he would cry.

  • Princess Diana was the first royal bride not to use the word obey in her marriage vows.
  • Prince Philip kept a collection of press cartoons of himself on the walls of his lavatory in Sandringham.
  • The Queen was an excellent mimic and sometimes entertained the family by aping the prime ministers she’d known in the last half-century.
  • Princess Margaret was afraid of the dark.
  • All royal babies are baptized with water brought from the river Jordan.

There you have it, some totally useless trivial facts about the royal family. I’ve always wondered if many of their activities were as normal as some of the things that we do. I won’t get into the details of what I sometimes think because it would be a little disrespectful and absolutely hilarious. A friend of mine after a recent discussion about the Royals put some strange thoughts into my head (off-color to be sure) which I won’t get into today. Here’s one last quote to help keep things in their proper “Royal” perspective.

The Queens description of Niagara Falls was “It looks very damp.”

R.I.P. LIZZIE

09/26/2022 πŸ’₯Silly Limerick AlertπŸ’₯   Leave a comment

Once again, it’s time for a few lighthearted limericks rather than the bawdier ones we’re used to. I’ll reference the author when possible.

By Frank Jacobs

A lion whose manners weren’t nice

Played Monopoly with two white mice.

After losing, he roared,

Then devoured the board,

Marvin Gardens, both mice and the dice.

πŸ˜‹πŸ˜‹πŸ˜‹

By Oliver Herford

Once a grasshopper (food being scant)

Begged an ant some assistance to grant.

But the ant shook his head

“I can’t help you,” he said,

“It’s an uncle you need, not an ant.

😎😎😎

By Anon

A barber who lived in Batavia

Was known for his fearless behavia.

When a giant brown bear

Took a seat in his chair,

Said the barber, “No way will I shavia.”

😏😏😏

By Gelett Burgess

I’d rather have fingers than toes.

I’d rather have ears than a nose.

And as for my hair,

I’m glad it’s still there,

I’ll be awfully sad when it goes.

🍩🍩🍩

HAPPY MONDAY

09/25/2022 “Miscellaneous Truths”   Leave a comment

The truth is sometimes strange and at other times ridiculous. These factoids are a little of both. They’re good for making a few bucks at bar bets on trivia night.

  • The term ” soap opera” comes from the fact that shows used to work advertisements for soap powder into the plot lines.
  • A champagne cork flying out of a bottle can travel as fast as 100 miles per hour.
  • People who fear the number 666 suffer from hexakaosioihexekontahexaphobia.
  • On November 21, 1980, 83 million Americans tuned in to watch the finale of the Dallas cliffhanger “Who Shot J.R.?” A few weeks earlier, 85.1 million Americans voted in the Reagan-Carter presidential election.
  • During a 60-year life span, an average tree will produce nearly 2 tons of leaves to be raked.

  • Dancing the tango was considered a sin in Paris during the early 1900s.
  • Those roped off areas where boxing matches take place actually used to be round, hence the term “boxing ring”.
  • Pope John XXI (1276-01277) had been in office less than a year before the ceiling on a new wing of his palace collapsed on him while he slept. He died six days later.
  • Nearly 4% of American women claim that they never wear underwear.
  • The Pentagon goes through more than 600 rolls of toilet paper every day.

TOO WEIRD TO BELIEVE? . . . WELL, BELIVE IT ANYWAY

Quote of the Day

“I have as much authority as the Pope. I just

don’t have as many people who believe it.”

George Carlin

09/24/2022 “Epithets”   Leave a comment

As I’ve stated many times in the past, I’ve always had a fascination with graveyards and cemeteries. With that thought in mind, here are a few of my favorite humorous epithets. It’s good to have a sense of humor even after death.

From Enosburg, Vermont

Here lies the body of our Anna

Done to death by a banana.

It wasn’t the fruit that laid her low

But the skin of the thing that made her go.

☠️☠️☠️

From Bayfield, Mississippi

Stranger pause. my tale attend,

And learn the cause of Hannah’s end.

Across the world the wind did blow,

She ketched a cold that laid her low.

We shed a lot of tears ’tis true,

But life is short – aged 82.

☠️☠️☠️

From Medway, Massachusetts

Beneath this stone, this lump of clay,

Lies Uncle Peter Daniels,

Who too early in the month of May

Took off his winter flannels.

☠️☠️☠️

From Canterbury, Kent, England

Of children in all she bore twenty-four:

Thank the Lord there will be no more.

☠️☠️☠️

From Chelmsford, Essex, England

Herer lies the man Richard,

And Mary his wife.

Their surname was Pritchard,

They lived without strife.

And the reason was plain,

They abounded in riches,

They had no care or pain,

And his wife wore the breeches.

HAVE YOU WRITTEN YOURS YET?

09/23/2022 “The Media”   Leave a comment

Over the years and after many mergers the Mainstream Media has become an arm of the corporations that seem to have their fingers into everything. It’s become painfully clear that many media types have become TV stars in their own right. You would think that those under public scrutiny would be more careful than most about the articles and headlines they post or print. I guess that folks who control what we see and read could at times be less than careful. To prove my point read these wonderfully lame and stupid headlines that made their way through writers and editors to amuse and annoy the rest of us.

Include Your Children When Baking Cookies

Drunks Get Nine Months in Violin Case

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Experts Say

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

War Dims Hope for Peace

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half

Smokers Are Productive, But Death Cuts Efficiency

Whatever Their Motives, Moms Who Kill Kids Still Shock Us

Lawyer Says Client Is Not That Guilty

This kind of carelessness is unbelievable. Lots of people are being paid lots of money to create these ridiculous headlines. Hopefully going forward the newspapers and websites will at least make some effort to stop the madness.

DON’T HOLD YOUR BREATH

09/21/2022 “Music Trivia”   2 comments

  • None of the Beatles could read music.
  • Paul McCarney’s real first name is James.
  • The real name of pop star Lorde is Ella Marija Lani Yelich-O’Connor.
  • Elvis Presley never wrote a song. He was just a performer.
  • Guitar manufacturer Gibson listed Jimi Hendrix as the number one guitar player of all time.

  • Sonny and Cher were originally known as Caesar and Cleo.
  • Prince played twenty-seven different instruments on his debut album, For You.
  • Iggy Pop once appeared in an episode of Star Trek – Deep Space Nine.
  • Andy Warhol was a frequent babysitter for Mick Jagger’s daughter Jade.
  • Karaoke machines were first built in Japan in 1971. The word “karaoke” means “empty orchestra” in Japanese.

TRY SINGING ALONG

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