Archive for the ‘notes’ Tag

06-25-2013   Leave a comment

Why is it that we just love to entertain ourselves listening and watching young children.  I suppose it’s their innocence and honesty so effortlessly projected.  The recent rash of TV commercials containing one adult and four kids in a discussion group setting has captured everyone’s hearts.  The honest answers coupled with their totally innocent facial expressions is priceless.

I understand the desire of businesses to use these kids for commercial purposes.  If there were four or five adults sitting around talking most of us would click the remote and move on to things that were more interesting and believable.  Adults are never perceived as being honest, especially those involved in the making of television commercials.

Over the years most commercials involving young kids and adults have not so subtly treated the adults like idiots.  The kids are then shown as the smart and sensible members of the family.  This kind of posturing plays right into the younger demographics but I always thought it was a little insulting to us adults.  I readily admit that many adults are idiots but I always held out hope that it was just a small percentage.

This morning lying in bed in a semi-relaxed state I was quietly surfing the net when I came upon a number of sites listing actual letters from parents who were excusing their children from school.  These samples reflect the actual wording and mis-spellings that those parents used.  I’m sure the teachers who received these notes were as shocked as I was.  It’s hard to understand how a reasonably intelligent parent would want their notes to the school to read this way.  Enjoy them and then just slowly shake your head with your total lack of understanding as I did.

  • Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre) (dyrea) (direathe) the shits. [words in ( )’S were crossed out.]
  • Sally won’t be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.
  • Please excuse little Jimmy for not being in school yesterday. His father is gone and I could not get him ready because I was in bed with the doctor.
  • My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines.
  • Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn’t the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.
  • Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
  • Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.
  • My child was absent from school yesterday because he had a sore trout.
  • Please excuse my son for being absent yesterday. “He has a cold and could not breed well”.
  • Excuse my son. He’s been under the doctor.
  • Please excuse my son from being absent yesterday. “He had diarrhea and his boots leak”.
  • Please excuse my daughter for being absent yesterday. “She was in bed with very bad gramps”.
  • Please excuse my child from school yesterday. “He had a bad stomach egg”.
  • Please excuse my child from missing school yesterday. “I thought we had a 3 day weekend”.

I certainly hope that the children of these parents are smarter than the parents seem to be.  Bad grammar, misspellings, and a general lack of concern with making the notes read like they came from a thinking adult.  There are times when talking with youngsters is the most refreshing part of the day.  At least they’re honest and anything humorous they come up with is based on a lack of experience and not a lack of intelligence.

04-13-2013   Leave a comment

Please, can someone explain to me just how I can go about getting "writers block".  It seems the only way I’ll be able to get some rest is if I can’t write anything at all.  Slowly over a period of time starting about three years ago my mind went into overdrive.  Now I find myself waking up in the middle of the night, sometimes more than once, with ideas demanding my attention.

At first I would get up, grab some coffee, sit at the computer, write out a quick draft, and then return to bed.  That got old very quickly so I decided to keep a notepad next to the bed. I could then just roll over and jot down notes without getting up at all. That sucked almost immediately when I had difficulty reading my half-asleep handwriting. Finally I purchased a small handheld recorder which didn’t work either. My recordings were so bad I sounded like I had a mouthful of rocks. Scratch that idea.

Well guess what I’m doing now.  Since I refuse to get up and get on the computer and I can’t write or record anything I understand, I’ve been stricken with an annoying case of insomnia.  I’ve experienced a number of things over the years that were unpleasant but this is by far the worst.  I’m awakened from a dead sleep and begin to recite to myself the thing that so rudely woke me up.

I’ve since tried dropping a couple of Tylenol PM’s before bed which helps me get to sleep but not to stay asleep.  I tried alcohol but unfortunately for me it’s more of a stimulant than a sleep aid.  It’s driving me just a little bit crazy of late because the only time I seem to get any sound sleep is in mid-afternoon for no more than twenty minutes at a time.

Another side effect which my better-half has mentioned on a number of occasions is that it’s making me just a bit cranky.  My normal fun loving self has slowly morphed into a newer and more sarcastic Don Rickles.  I’ve been told in no uncertain terms that this crap has to stop.  I cleaned up the actual language she used because this is supposed to be a "G" rated blog and I understand how sensitive some of you are. The point she’s trying to make is that the more screwed up my sleep is the more miserable, unfriendly, and argumentative I’ve become.

I’m hoping these problems soon rectify themselves with the beginning of Spring, warmer weather, and increased physical activity. If they don’t I could be in big trouble.