11-06-2013 Journal Entry   Leave a comment

Today is my ninth day living in this one-legged hell my life has become. I’ve learned a few valuable things in these nine days and I thought I’d share them with you.

  • First, don’t break your damn leg. I know it’s a bit simplistic but sometimes you just need to be told the obvious.
  • Second, hope and pray your relationship is solid because it will be tested. I’ve become somewhat irritable and difficult or at least that’s what my better-half has been screaming at me.
  • Third, prepare yourself for the realization that all it takes is a small bone in your leg to break to turn you into a giant dependent ball of human flesh.

I was raised to be as independent as possible and have spent my entire life just that way.  I hate relying on anyone for anything.  I’ve had a few times in my life where I was laid up for a day or two but nothing like this. Six to eight weeks of sitting on my ass and stumbling around the house being unable to do a damn thing. It’s incredibly frustrating to say the least. My better-half remains supportive but realizes I’m quickly going out of my mind with cabin fever. 

I’ve improved my walking abilities with these crutches but it’ll never be enough to make this situation bearable. Since I’m unable to carry coffee and walk on crutches at the same time it took a day or two for me to solve that problem.  A sealable carry-mug that fits nicely into my pocket was the solution. I can now walk/hop/drag a leg to the kitchen, retrieve some coffee, and return to my chair.  It sounds stupid I know but it’s a major accomplishment for me.

Thank God for my X-Box and IPad.  Those two devices are the only things keeping me from going bat-shit crazy.  I’ve always spent a lot of time on the X-Box but now it’s totally out of control.  I’m afraid I may be developing a serious case of X-Box thumbs. The IPad has allowed me to connect with hundreds of other addicted Scrabble fanatics to play Word HD with Friends.  A great little App that allows me to continuously play multiple games with people from around the country.  The time really flies by very quickly when I’m focused in those games.

I received some good news on my follow-up visit to the orthopedist today. The leg is healing properly and no surgery will be required.  I’m to spend the next two weeks doing things much the same as I’ve been doing. That news raised my morale a bit and hopefully in two more weeks I’ll be permitted to put some weight on the leg which will really jump start this recovery.

One other quick note.  My better-half suggested a trip to Walmart today to pickup a few items and somehow strong-armed me into riding on one of their infamous electric carts.  I put up a good fight but there was no talking to her.  For years I’ve bitched and complained about certain people on those carts blocking aisles and being a general nuisance to other shoppers.  Well, today I joined the elite ranks of the Walmart Disabled Shoppers Group.  I was hoping for a Walmart hat or T-shirt but sadly I was out of luck.  They wanted to give me a pair of pink sweat pants that had “JUICY” on the ass but I declined.  Pink just isn’t my color.  It clashes way too much with my purple sweatshirt and my orange Budweiser baseball cap.  That’s my official Walmart shopping outfit.

We’re headed back home now where I’ll enjoy another afternoon of Scrabble, Tiger Woods 2011, and really bad TV.  I must have done something really terrible in a past life to deserve this karmic ass-kicking.

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