12-11-2013 More Christmas & Kwanza Factoids   Leave a comment

I wonder about Christmas sometimes.  We know it wasn’t the actual day that Christ was born and we’re pretty sure the entire story was made up well after the fact by people who weren’t even there.  Yet it remains the ultimate religious observance except maybe for Easter where religion has slowly faded into the background.  As always I have a lot of questions and felt  the need to search out some answers.  Unfortunately there are as many answers as there are versions of the original story.  Here’s a few that I found.

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Why are there Twelve Days of Christmas?

Traditionally, it took the ‘Three Kings’ this number of days to find the baby Jesus. Their arrival on the twelfth day was celebrated in the form of the Feast of Epiphany in medieval France, and later in other countries.

Where did the Candy Cane come from?

In a small Indiana town, there was a candy maker who wanted to spread the name of Jesus around the world. He invented the Christmas Candy Cane, incorporating symbols for the birth, ministry, and death of Jesus Christ. He began with a stick of pure white, hard candy to symbolize the Virgin Birth. The candy maker formed the stick into a “J” to represent the name of Jesus or it can also represent the staff of the “Good Shepherd.” He thought the candy was too plain so he stained it with a red stripe to symbolize the blood shed by Christ on the cross.

Weird Christmas Games

Shoe the Wild Mare

Shoeing the Wild Mare is a traditional Christmas game that goes back to at least the early 17th century. Get a narrow(a few inches wide),strong wooden beam and suspend it from the roof with two even length ropes. The beam is the ‘mare’ of the title and should be level yet high enough above the floor so that a player’s feet are off-ground. A player ‘the farrier’ then sits on the ‘mare’ in the center, a leg on either side. This player has a hammer and has to give the underside of the beam “four time eight blows” at a designated spot. If he falls off, it is someone else’s turn. Much hilarity, and the odd broken shoulder ensues.

Snapdragons

Apparently this is the best game ever to play on Christmas Eve. Make sure you have the fire department on speed dial though. Very popular from the 16th to the 19th centuries, Snapdragons  has explicably declined in popularity.

Gather everyone around the dining room table, place a large flat dish in the center. In the dish scatter a good handful of raisins then pour on top a layer of brandy or cognac. Set fire to the brandy and dim the lights. Players take turns  plucking a raisin out of the burning liquid and eating it quickly. For a more competitive edge to the game use larger dried fruit such as apricots, one of which has a lucky coin stuffed inside.

Equipment needed: plate, matches, raisins, brandy, and the address of nearest fire department.

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I could easily have added another fifty items even more stupid than these but life’s too short.  I’ve decided that every story  about Christmas and every weird tradition that’s been adopted any where on the planet is nothing more than a large steaming pile.  I give up.  When it comes right down to it Christmas is no more legitimate than Kwanza.  I’d love to be around in a hundred years or so to see what Kwansa morphs into.  They’ll always be a herd of idiots who’ll believe almost anything they’re told by just about anyone.  I wonder if this country will ever be invaded by Kwanza believers with bombs strapped to their chests, angry that their religion is being disrespected.  It could happen.  I’m also glad I won’t be here to see it.

MERRY EFFING KWANZA

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