12-09-2014 Journal – Things I Once Hated IV!   Leave a comment

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I know you’ve all been waiting for my next installment of the “Things I Once Hated”. I’m only going through this endless process because I need to show my better-half just how much I’ve mellowed over the years and that living with her has had a serious calming effect on me (sarcasm off).  Let’s get this going for numbers 41-55.

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#41 Organic Food – This is one of the biggest scams going.  Put organic on the label of anything and you can immediately increase the price by twenty-five percent.  In my opinion anything that is grown is organic.  Wash off any fertilizer and insecticide and you have clean and organic food. I hate  those liars who extort money from all of us under suspicious circumstances or labeling.  No improvement here.

#42 Liars – refer back to #41.  On a daily basis we have dozens of people who lie to us.  I’ve always hated being told things that are less than true and I still do.  No improvement here either.

#43 Ear Hair – I was introduced to this issue when my better-half was caught trying to trim the hair in my ears while I was napping.  It’s one of her pet peeves and she’s gently forced me into adding it to my original list of one hundred.  I’m still being forced to hate it or there’d be hell to pay. No improvement.

#44 Doctors – I’ve had to rethink this item because I finally met a doctor that wasn’t playing God and actually treated me like a thinking human being. I’ll concede to a 50% improvement.

#45 Large Aureoles – As I’ve stated many times before I love boobs.  But large aureoles bother me for some unknown reason.  I’m forced into not hating them because they’re normally attached to things I love. It’s a conundrum I tell you. No more hate for them results in a 100% improvement.

#46 Overweight Babies – Just writing about this problem pisses me off. Overfeeding a toddler or young kid is about the worst start you can give them in life. I hate the thought of it almost as much as the people responsible. No improvement.

#47 Dirty Toilets – I suppose you think I’m only talking about those disgusting restrooms found in stores and gas stations. I am but I’m also including anyone else who refuses to clean their own bathrooms.  I’ve been in a few that still give me nightmares. No improvement.

#48 Stinky Cheese – I just don’t see the point of making or eating some types of stinky cheese.  My grandfather was a big fan of Limburger cheese and I suspect it was only because it kept us kids away from him during  our visits.  No improvement and no thank you.

#49 Opossums – One of the most disgusting animals on the planet.  I understand they’re great to have around to clean up road kill but they’re gross, ugly, and disgusting.  No possible improvement.

#50 Roadside Death Shrines – I’m reconsidering this item out of sympathy to those people who insist on building them.  I think the whole process is a waste of time and effort but I guess if it makes them feel better for all of fifteen minutes. What the hell,  since I’m now a much more loving and tolerant person I can let it go (sarcasm off). 100% improvement.

#51 Extra Toes – Too creepy to even discuss and that goes for webs between the toes as well. Go join a carnival but stay away from me. No improvement.

#52 Nose Hair – Again something being pushed on me by my better-half. She’s obsessed with hating this item therefore so must I.  No improvement.

#53 Jehovah Witnesses – I can’t begin to tell you how much fun I’ve had over the years messing with these people.  I can’t say I actually hate them personally but  I do resent anyone who tries to force their belief system on me. These folks are nothing if not persistent making them a huge target for my sometime sick sense of humor.  100% improvement.

#54 Salesmen – I’ll modify this category somewhat. I hate “high pressure” sales people. So I’ll claim a 50% improvement on this one as long as they don’t get in my face.

#55 Hot Tuna Casserole – I’ve done a total 180 on this one. I finally found someone with a recipe that I actually liked and looked forward to eating.  No more hating of hot tuna dishes. 100% improvement.

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That should do it for today. Fifty-five items now completed with only forty-five more to go.  Just remember all of these items are in no particular order of importance.

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