I decided that it was time to post a few limericks collected from a small and damaged book I discovered some months ago. It was published in 1980 and contains over 150 of the lewdest limericks I’ve ever seen. The great majority are so nasty I wouldn’t dare post them here, but I’ve found four of the more acceptable ones to give you an idea what I’m dealing with. Tell the kids to leave the room. Rated at least an “R”.

A worried young man from Stamboul

Discovered red spots on his tool.

Said the doctor, a cynic,

“Get out of my clinic!

Just wipe off the lipstick, you fool.

🍆🍩🍆

In the Garden of Eden lay Adam,

Complacently stroking his madam,

And so loud was his mirth

For on all of the earth

There were only two balls – and he had’em.

🍩🍆🍩

There was a young girl in Berlin

Who was fucked by an elderly Finn.

Though he diddled his best,

And fucked her with zest,

She kept asking, “Hey, Pop, is it in?”

🍆🍩🍆

There was a young man from Purdue

Who was only just learning to screw,

But he hadn’t the knack,

And he got too far back

In the right church, but the wrong pew.

🍩🍆🍩

AND THESE WERE THE TAME ONES