I really hate to admit this, I’ve turned into a raging paranoic. I’ve blogged many times about fake and biased news and while it’s being addressed nationally these days, a lot of everyday folks love believing everything they read or hear. Today’s blog is a list of random nonsense being spoken of by good old ordinary Americans who obviously don’t know what the hell they’re talking about. It scares me a little because the more you tell a lie the more likely it is that some of the boneheads you’re telling believe it without question. I can’t do anything to stop that but I’ll certainly point out some strange shit that I’ve been seeing and hearing recently.

• More than 1% of the US population is currently in jail. FALSE

• Aspirin was originally invented to treat erectile dysfunction. FALSE

• Left-handed people live an average of nine years longer than right-handed people. FALSE

• Legendary children’s show host Mr. Rogers was once a Marine sniper with thousands of killed under his belt. FALSE

• Despite being a common joke today, Robin never actually says Holy Cow (or Toledo)Batman during any episodes. FALSE

• The planet Mercury is the hottest planet in the solar system. FALSE

• If we removed every boat, ship, and submarine from the oceans, sea level would fall about 6 inches. FALSE

• The popular online rumor suggests that hippopotamus milk is pink. FALSE

• The word FUCK was once said over 1000 times in one movie. FALSE

• Humans are the only animals on earth to perform oral sex on each other. FALSE

💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻

And my favorite FAKE news:

I’M CALLED BIG JOHN FOR ONLY ONE REASON!

(Figure it out . . .)