If you’ve read this blog at all you already know I’m a bit of a hoarder of adages, phrases, idioms, and anything else that interests me. Today I’ll supply you with a list of twenty-five of my favorite sayings. Some are quotes from well-known people, but most are ones that I picked up along the way from whoever was lucky enough to speak them to me. Maybe you’ll find a few that tickle your fancy or your funny bone or both. Enjoy.
- Religious men are fools! Fools should be taken lightly.
- A parent is a little kid pretending to be a big kid so his little kid won’t be afraid.
- Being involved with two women is like playing pool on two tables. You may have enough balls for it but you’ll wear out your stick.
- The ten best years of a woman’s life are between the ages of twenty-nine and thirty.
- When angry, count four; when very angry, swear.
- A yawn is a silent shout.
- The great artists of the world are never Puritans, and seldom respectable.
- They are no premature babies, only delayed weddings.
- There’s always free cheese in a mousetrap.
- Chastity is curable if detected early.
- If Christian nations were nations of Christians, there would be no wars.
- Colleges don’t make fools, they only develop them.
- Common sense could prevent most divorces and all marriages.
- It is not death that alarms me but dying.
- A diplomat is a person who always remembers a women’s birthday, but never her age.
- He who hesitates is last.
- It’s not the men in my life I worry about, it’s the life in my men.
- A pessimist thinks all women are bad. An optimist hopes they are.
- The ultimate rejection is when your hand falls asleep while masturbating.
- Sex is only dirty, if its done right.
- Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
- I prefer an interesting vice to a boring virtue.
- I am not young enough to know everything.
DID YOU FIND ANY YOU LIKED?
cli·ché
/kliˈʃeɪ, klɪ-/ [klee-shey, kli-] noun
1.a trite, stereotyped expression; a sentence or phrase, usually expressing a popular or common thought or idea, that has lost originality, ingenuity, and impact by long overuse, as sadder but wiser, or strong as an ox.
2.(in art, literature, drama, etc.) a trite or hackneyed plot, character development, use of color, musical expression, etc.
3.anything that has become trite or commonplace through overuse.
4.British Printing.
a. a stereotype or electrotype plate.
b. a reproduction made in a like manner.
adjective
5.trite; hackneyed; stereotyped; clichéd.
The word cliché comes from two origins:
- A sound – The French used the word to describe the sound that a matrix, or a mold with letters on it, made when it was being dropped into molten metal to make a printing plate.
- A printing plate – Oddly enough, the printing plate itself was called a cliché or a stereotype and it was one of the first movable types in the world.
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I like to stay ahead of the game and to be all things to all men but that’s easier said than done at times. I always try to hammer out things, leave no stone unturned, to give you a leg up on events and to dish the dirt religiously.
I love to punch the clock, push the envelope, and push people’s buttons whenever possible. I may pull someone’s leg but I’ll never pull any punches or leave you in the lurch. I’m the master of the left-handed compliment and I’ll do my level best to harp on a point and let the chips fall where they may.
I probably should quit while I’m ahead but I so enjoy pulling the rug out from under people who need it. I’ll let the cat out of the bag in a New York minute because it’s all in a day’s work here at Every Useless Thing.
I’ve seen the handwriting on the wall while pounding this Internet pavement and while I operate tongue-in-cheek I’ll touch all the bases, tilt at the appropriate windmills and draw a bead on whoever tickles my fancy.
I try to fair and balanced but sometimes it’s a tough row to hoe. It goes without saying that the Internet can be all things to all men but many people love playing fast and loose with the truth. It occasionally causes me to throw caution to the wind, find the liars and throw them under the bus.
With this posting I’m trying to determine if I could on a good day use clichés to make small talk and supply you with food for thought. Most days I operate off the top of my head scrounging around for nuggets of information to help me let off a little steam. To make a long story short, I’ll never hold my tongue. I’ll continue to call a spade a spade especially when I’m on the warpath about something. Don’t believe everything I say hook, line and sinker but if the shoe fits, wear it.
IT’S ALL IN A DAY’S WORK!
everyuselessthing.com 