01-14-2014 Hater’s Are Alive and Well   Leave a comment

A long time ago in a blog that is now far, far, away I posted a four part list of the one hundred things I hated the most.  I spent a lot of time compiling that list and after posting it I went on about my life.  I never thought much more about it until yesterday when I spotted a few websites indicating everyone is hating something these days.  After reading through almost a hundred lists I had an epiphany.  All of a sudden I seemed like the calm, reserved, and thoughtful person and the rest of the world appears populated by a new generation of haters.  Some how I’d been dropped very far down the list of haters and that pissed me off a little.

I took a sampling of a few things that seem to show up on many of the lists including my own.  I’ll list a few to give you an idea exactly what I’m talking about.

People Who talk Over You
Google Obsessed People
People Who Don’t Get Sarcasm
Tyra Banks
Back Seat Drivers
Web Page Ads
Discourteous Public Bathroom Users
Loud People
Drama Queens
Bad Drivers
OBX Stickers
Global Warming Idiots

Some of those items are funny, some seem to make good sense but most are just ho-hum or so it seems to me.  Since “I HATE” being left behind I thought it would be cool if I brought my list back from the archives, updated it a bit, and send it your way.  After going through that process I discovered that I’ve  mellowed a great deal in the intervening years and my list has shrunk to only 52 items.  I was forced to revaluate the old list with the eye of a retired person.  Many things that used to piss me off no longer bother me at all.  It’s all just slightly amusing to me at this point in time.

So, here’s my newly revised list.  It’s a very cathartic process doing a large list like this, you should try it yourself.  Don’t be afraid, no one will really HATE you for doing it.  Just don’t use any real names and your good to go.  So here I go.

Stupid People
Rosie O’Donnell
Unibrow Women
Homeless People
Dirty Finger Nails
Backward Baseball Caps
Large Groups of People
Penn & Teller
Dumb Cashiers
Stinky Feet
Hairy Bushes
Oprah Winfrey
Will Ferrell
The Smell of Urine
Women Missing Teeth
Political Correctness
Ear Hair
Large Aureoles
Dirty Toilets
Roadside Death Shrines.
Extra Toes
Nose Hair
Jehovah Witnesses
Ass Kissers
Stinky Breath
Illegal Aliens
Wet  Farts
Performing Artists
Ugly Feet
Sean Penn
Stinky Garbage
Arrogant People
Inverted Nipples
Noisy Radios
The French
Hairy Nipples (On Women)
Yellow Nail Polish
Baby Pageants
Texting While Driving
Granny Panties
Penis Caught in Zipper
Tail Gater’s, Stinky Arm Pits

You’ve been the recipient of the Official Every Useless Thing Hate List for 2014.  Make up your own list.  Once you get start listing it becomes almost a living thing.  You just keep on going and going and going and you have to force yourself to stop.

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