10-19-2015 Journal – Flu Shots, Y or N!   Leave a comment

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Have you gotten your flu shot yet?  For the last month I’ve been receiving emails from damn near everyone reminding me to do so.  OMFG . . . every year it’s the same damn thing. It seems everyone on this planet knows how to keep me healthy better than I do. Up until three years ago I’d never had a flu shot but finally gave into all of the pressure from friends, family, insurance companies, and doctors.

Four years ago I came down with a wicked case of the flu that actually was so bad  I thought I was going to die. Since fear is the ultimate motivator for us poor humans I decided to finally give in and get flu shots on a regular basis.

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I understand how the shots are supposed to work but as with all things I’ve become somewhat skeptical.  I have very low expectations of most people because they insist on telling me things that forward their agendas instead of my own. People say I’m too cynical, skeptical, and pragmatic but after years of experience I’ve found myself correct more often than not. 

I made my way to Rite-Aid a few weeks ago with a note from my insurance carrier and a pat on the head from Medicare.  The process was simple, straight forward, and before I knew it I was in, inoculated, and done.  Then I sat down and began to peruse the pile of paperwork they handed me. A rather nice young lady took some of her valuable time to tell me about some of the possible symptoms I could expect.  First, within 48 hours my arm would be a sore and might stiffen up a little.  In a week after that I would likely have issues with headaches and possibly a minor fever.  I thought for a minute that I was flashing back on one of those hundreds of TV drug commercials we’re bombarded with. I sat patiently waiting for her to include anal leakage as one of my symptoms but she never did . . . thank God.   

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It’s now two weeks later and I’m going through my list of symptoms right on schedule. I had the required sore arm for a few days which was annoying but not too terrible. I could still pick my nose but it hurt a little. The arm remained sore for almost a week until the headaches kicked in. The arm still hurt but I was more concerned about the headache that was threatening  to blow the top of my head off. I’ve never been prone to headaches or migraines but this had to be something very similar.  I spent my days popping dozens of Tylenol and was still unable to sit quietly to read a book.  I won’t even get into the side effects from taking all of those damn Tylenol. All I could think about was how lucky I was to have so many smart people convincing me to get that damn flu shot.

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Next  the low grade fever arrived right on schedule.  It’s been sapping my strength for the last week but finally seems to be easing up some.  So for more than three weeks now I’ve had what I’m told is a mild case of the flu. My last serious bout with the flu lasted only a week but so far this alleged mild version has hung in there for three weeks.

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I’m beginning to believe that the cure is actually as bad if not worse than the disease. Thanks to everyone who convinced (conned) me to get that effing shot. All I really want to know now is who do I contact later in the Fall when I actually get the real flu. I have a strong cynical feeling that may occur as well.

It’s funny but I’m also sure if I do  actually get the flu all of those alleged experts who strong-armed me into this flu shot will be missing in action. They’ll return next year in larger numbers to again frighten and strong-arm many of us once again.

LONG LIVE THE HEALTHCARE SYSTEM

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