Archive for the ‘socrates’ Tag
I discovered over the years that the older you get the more reminiscing you do and I’m still not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. I’ve always been a believer of worrying about the future not the past and that hasn’t changed a whole lot. I’ll be turning 78 years old in August of this year and I’m amazed. I never thought I’d live this long because of my rough and tumble attitude towards living. As I was reminiscing about my long and somewhat interesting life I wondered, what some of the other people that I read about deal with their aging after the age of 70. I always jokingly told anyone who’d listen that after 70 I would retire, sit on my porch with a drink, and smoke as much weed as I could get my hands on until I passed on. Little did I know that I’d be buying my cannabis at a convenience store in gummy form. One of life’s many miracles. I thought a little reflection on my current lifestyle should be matched against some of our more famous or infamous celebrities.
Age 70
Socrates is condemned to die for corrupting the minds of Athenian youth.
Me: I made dozens of bottles of wine, and then spent a few months drinking them.
Age 71
Nelson Mandela was released from a South African prison, after 20 years of incarceration.
Me: Completed a few graphic paintings of scantily clad buxom young women. Then I drank some more wine and sat and looked at them. And yes, I still do.
Age 72
The Marquis de Sade takes a new, 15-year-old lover.
Me: I looked for a 15-year-old lover but forgot why.
Page 73
Walt Stack completes the Ironman Triathlon in 26 hours, 20 minutes.
Me: I did 1000 steps in one day, and my faithful Fit Bit was so amazed it exploded.
Age 74
Albert Einstein announces his unified field theory (but it didn’t hold up).
Me: Drank more wine, contemplated some of my erotic paintings, and worked hard trying to remember the names of the models.
Age 75
Fanny Garrison Villard founds the Women’s Peace Society.
Me: I founded and celebrated the Maine chapter of the Jack Daniels Fan Club. I also considered making a Hag to their distillery in Tennessee.
Age 76
Charles Foster Kane, of Citizen Kane, whispers his immortal, confounding clue, “Rosebud”.
Me: I decided after rereading Citizen Kane that I needed a lot more Jack Daniels. It’s the only way to defend myself against the boredom of Orson Welles and his writings. Little did he know I once had a fat little gerbil named Orson who never really bored me at all.
Age 77
Grandma Moses takes up painting in a serious manner.
Me: After 16 years of my so-called retirement, I bought a lot more weed and a case of a really good Chardonnay in preparation for the start of our three grandson’s 2024 Little League debuts.
LIFE CAN BE GOOD – IF YOU LET IT
After writing this blog for so many years, I tend to write and read everything six times trying to correct my many mistakes. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem to be the norm for other people to edit themselves, even those who are magazine and newspaper editors. It’s commonplace in everyday advertisements to see misspelled words, bad grammar and a general lack of concern for accuracy. It appears that our education system may be partially responsible for some of these issues, and it drives me effing crazy. Here are a few examples of “malaprops” collected from grade school, high school, and college examination papers. What do you think?
- The American colonists won their Revolutionary War and no longer had to pay for taxis.
- The air is thin high up in the sky, down here, it’s fat.
- The flood damage was so bad they had to evaporate the city.
- A horse divided against itself cannot stand.
- The U.S. Constitution was adopted to secure domestic hostility.
- Columbus discovered America while cursing about the Atlantic.
- Brigham Young led the Morons to Utah.
- Socrates died from taking a poison called wedlock.
- The police surrounded the building and threw an accordion around the block.
- To prevent head colds, use an agonizer to spray medicine into your nose.
Here’s one of my favorites:
Achilles’ mother dipped him in the River Stinks until he became immoral.
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READIN, WRITIN, & RITHMATIC
I know it’s been a while but here is installment number eleven to further assist you in the examination of your life. I hope these fifteen questions will prompt some interesting conversations between you and the person you share them with. As the famous Greek scholar Socrates once stated: “An unexamined life is not worth living.”
- If you knew a thermonuclear holocaust would occur in precisely twenty years and no one would survive it, how would you change your present life?
- When did you last cry in front of another person? by yourself?
- If, by getting a 2″ x 2″ tattoo, you could save five lives and prevent a terrorist attack, would you do so? If you were allowed to select the location and design, where would you have it placed and what would the design be?
- Someone you love deeply is brutally murdered and you know the identity of the murderer, who unfortunately is acquitted of the crime. Would you seek revenge?
- Would you be willing to give up all television for the next five years if it would induce someone to provide for 1000 starving children in Indonesia?
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- While arguing with a close friend on the telephone, she gets angry and hangs up. Assuming she is at fault and makes no attempt to contact you, how long would you wait to get in touch with her?
- What do you value most in a relationship?
- If you learned you would die in a few days, what regrets would you have? Were you given five extra years of life, could you avoid the same regrets five years hence?
- Do you judge others by higher or lower standards than you use to judge yourself?
- Would you be willing to make a substantial sacrifice to have any of the following: your picture on a postage stamp, your statue in a park, a college named after you, a Nobel prize, a national holiday in your honor?
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- On an airplane you are talking pleasantly to a stranger of average appearance. Unexpectedly, the person offers you $10,000 for one night of sex. Knowing that there is no danger and that the payment is certain, would you accept the offer?
- If you had to spend the next two years inside a small but fully provisioned Antarctic shelter with one other person, whom would you like to have with you?
- You notice a self-destructive behavior pattern in a friend who is clearly unaware of it. Would you point it out?
- If you had the choice of one intimate soulmate and no other close friends, or of no such soulmate and many friends and acquaintances, which would you choose?
- You become involved romantically but after six months realize you need to end the relationship. If you were certain the person would commit suicide if you were to leave and were also certain you could not be happy with the person, what would you do?
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MORE TO FOLLOW
Welcome to installment #9. These questions are a little more intense but very interesting answers should be forthcoming. And for those of you who feel these questions are dark and threatening, here’s one for you tamer or lamer folks: How many cute and furry puppies must you save from a fate worse than death to be considered a true pet lover? LOL
Let’s get going!
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- If you were able to wake up tomorrow in the body of someone else, would you do so? Whom would you pick?
- If you are happily married, and then met someone you felt certain would always bring you deeply passionate, intoxicating love, would you leave your spouse? What if you had kids?
- When you do something ridiculous, how much does it bother you to have other people notice it and laugh at you?
- Who is the most important person in your life? What could you do to improve the relationship? Will you ever do it?
- Assuming that complete recovery was instantaneous, would you be willing to accept a year of complete paralysis below the neck to prevent the otherwise certain extinction of the blue whale?
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- Do you believe in capital punishment? Would you be willing to execute a man sentenced to death by the courts if you were selected by lot to do so and he would go free if you refused? Assume you know no details of the trial.
- If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
- You are at a lake with some friends; the sun is warm, and the water is cold. Going into the water would temporarily chill you but you knew that later on the warm sun would be even more enjoyable and you’d be glad you had gone in. Would you take the plunge?
- Do you believe in any sort of God? If not, do you think you might still pray if you were in a life-threatening situation?
- While out one day, you are surprised to see your mother holding hands with someone who is clearly her lover. She notices you, runs over, and begs you not to say anything to your father. How would you respond? What would you do if your father later told you that he was going crazy because he kept thinking your mother was having an affair yet knew it was just his imagination?
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- If 100 people your age were chosen at random, how many do you think you’d find leading a more satisfying life than yours?
- If you went to a beach and it turned out to be a nude beach, would you stay and go swimming? Would you swim nude?
- Have you had satisfying sex within the last three months?
- Would it disturb you much if, upon your death, your body were simply thrown into the woods and left to rot? Why?
- Which would you prefer: a wild, turbulent life filled with joy, sorrow, passion, and adventure – intoxicating successes and stunning setbacks; or a happy, secure, predictable life surrounded by friends and family without such wide swings of fortune and mood?
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IF THESE QUESTION DON’T PROVOKE DISCUSSION, NOTHING WILL!
Installment eight continues this series of posts designed to promote discussion and thought through self-examination. I hope it’ll generate some interesting discussions between you, your friends, and partners. Without interesting people in our lives and a lack of interesting conversations things would become excruciatingly boring.
Also, for those of you who are interested, starting today this blog will no longer be posted daily. I’ve decided to cut back a little to allow for more time for other projects. It’s been more than twelve years of daily postings and I’ll miss that part of my routine. I’m immediately cutting back to three postings a week, Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays beginning today. Now let’s get on with Self-Examination #8.
“The unexamined life is not worth living.” Socrates
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- Do you usually make a special effort to thank someone who does you a favor? How do you react when you aren’t thanked for going out of your way for someone?
- Would you like to have your rate of physical aging slowed by a factor of thirty so as to give you a life expectancy of approximately 2000 years?
- You are invited to a party that will be attended by many fascinating people you’ve never met. Would you want to go if you had to go by yourself?
- Since adolescence, in what three-year period do you feel you experienced the most personal growth and change?
- If you were having difficulty on an important test and could safely cheat by looking at someone else’s paper, would you do so?
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- If your parents became infirm and the only alternative to bringing them into your house was to put them in a nursing home, would you do so? What about a sister or brother who suffered a permanently crippling injury and had nowhere to go?
- If you were at a friend’s house for Thanksgiving dinner and you found a dead cockroach in your salad, what would you do?
- If you could take a one-month trip to anywhere in the world and money were not a consideration, where would you go and what would you do?
- Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by five years to become extremely attractive?
- Given the ability to project yourself into the past but not return, would you do so? Where would you go and what would you try to accomplish if you knew you might change the course of history?
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- How many different sexual partners have you had in your life? Would you prefer to have had more or fewer?
- Have you ever considered suicide? What is so important to you that without it life would not be worth living?
- If your friends and acquaintances were willing to bluntly and honestly tell you what they really thought of you, would you want them to?
- If this country were to suffer an unprovoked nuclear attack and would be totally obliterated in a matter of minutes, would you favor unleashing the US nuclear arsenal upon the attackers?
- Would you accept $10,000 to shave your head and continue your normal activities without hat or wig without explaining the reason for the new haircut?
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ENJOY YOUR DAY
“The unexamined life is not worth living.” Socrates
It’s once again time to introduce installment number seven of this series. As I’ve posted them, I’ve found the conversations between myself and my better-half to be quite interesting. Some of my answers have surprised her and some of hers have surprised me. That’s a good thing for any relationship when after twenty or more years together you can still be pleasantly surprised by each other. Let’s get started . . .
- One hot summer afternoon, while walking through a parking lot at a large shopping center, you notice a dog suffering badly from the heat inside a locked car. What would you do?
- Do you feel ill at ease going alone to either dinner or a movie? What about going on a vacation by yourself?
- If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living?
- For $20,000 would you go for three months without washing, brushing your teeth, or using deodorant? Assume you could not explain your reasons to anyone.
- Would you rather die peacefully among friends at age 50, or painfully and alone at age 80? Assume that most of the last 30 years would be good ones.
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- If you were to discover that your closest friend was a heroin dealer, what would you do?
- Is it easy for you to accept help when you need it? Will you ask for help?
- If you were helping to raise money for charity and someone agreed to make a large contribution if you would perform at the upcoming fundraising show, would you? If so, what would you like to perform? Assume the show would have an audience of about 1000 people.
- Would you have one of your fingers surgically removed if it somehow guaranteed immunity from all major diseases?
- Would you like to be famous? In what way?
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- How do you picture your funeral? Is it important for you to have people mourn your death?
- Which of the following restrictions could you best tolerate: leaving the country permanently, or never leaving the state in which you now live?
- You, your closest friend, and your father are on vacation together, hiking in a remote jungle. Your two companions stumble into a nest of poisonous vipers and are bitten repeatedly. You know neither will live without an immediate shot of antivenom, yet there is only a single dose of antivenom and that is in your pocket. What would you do?
- Where would you choose to be if you could place yourself anywhere on a scale from 1 to 10, where one is hardship, struggle, and extraordinary accomplishment and 10 is comfort, peace of mind, and no accomplishment. Why? Where are you now?
- If you could choose the sex and physical appearance of your soon to be born child, would you do it?
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HAVE FUN WITH IT
Today is as good a day as any to continue this series with installment #5. It should make for interesting discussions to start the new year. I hope you enjoy these topics because they seem to be more interesting than those that came before. Just remember:
“The unexamined life is not worth living.”
Socrates
- Can you urinate in front of another person?
- If you walk out of your house one morning and saw a bird with a broken wing huddled in some nearby bushes, what would you do?
- Assume there were a technological breakthrough that would allow people to travel as easily and cheaply between continents as between nearby cities. Unfortunately, there would also be 100,000 deaths a year from the device. Would you try to prevent its use?
- You and a person you love deeply are placed in separate rooms with a button next to each of you. You know you will both be killed unless one of you presses your button before 60 minutes pass; furthermore, the first to press the button will save the other person but will immediately be killed. What do you think you would do?
- When you tell a story, do you often exaggerate or embellish it? If so, why?
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- Do you feel that advice from older people carries a special weight because of their greater experience?
- Without your kidney as a transplant, someone close to you will die within one month. The odds that you will survive the operation are only 50%, but should you survive, you would be certain of a normal life expectancy. Would you consent to the operation?
- When has your life dramatically changed as the result of some seemingly random external influence? How much do you feel in control of the course of your life?
- If a friend were almost always late, would you resent it or simply allow for it? Can you be counted on to be on time?
- When did you last yell at someone? Why? Did you later regret it?
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- Would you be willing to have horrible nightmares every night for a year if you would be rewarded with extraordinary wealth?
- If you could have free, unlimited service for five years from an extremely good cook, chauffeur, housekeeper, masseuse, or personal secretary, which would you choose?
- Would you be willing to go to a slaughterhouse? Do you eat meat?
- Would you enjoy spending a month of solitude in a beautiful natural setting? Food and shelter would be provided but you would not see another person.
- After a medical examination, your doctor calls and gravely says you have a rare lymphatic cancer with only a few months to live. Five days later, she informs you that the lab test was mislabeled, and you are perfectly healthy. Forced for a moment to look death in the face, you have been allowed to turn and go on. During those difficult days you would certainly have gained some insights about yourself. Do you think they would be worth the pain?
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THESE ONES WILL GET YOU THINKING
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“The unexamined life is not worth living”
Socrates
Since Christmas has finally come and gone, I thought another installment of An Examined Life would get us all thinking about the end of another year and what we’ve accomplished or didn’t accomplish. Maybe these postings can assist us in deciding what our New Year’s resolutions might be. They’re always fun to write and I’ll be posting mine very soon. How about you?
- When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
- You have the power to go any distance into the future and after one year, return to the present with any knowledge you have gained from your experience, but you cannot bring any physical objects with you. Would you make the journey if it carried a 50% risk of death?
- Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as your dinner guest? As your closest friend? As your lover?
- While working late at night, you slightly scraped the side of a nearby Porsche. You’re certain no one else is aware of what happened. The damage is minor and would not be covered by insurance anyway. Would you leave a note?
- If you could choose the manner of your death, what would it be?
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- Do you have any specific long-term goals? What is one and how you plan to reach it?
- For what in your life do you feel the most grateful?
- How do you react when people sing “Happy Birthday” to you in a restaurant?
- What is the worst psychological torture you can imagine suffering? Anything causing even minor physical injury should not be considered.
- Would you like your spouse to be both smarter and more attractive than you?
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- If you found that a good friend had AIDS, would you avoid him or her? What if your brother or sister had it?
- Would you be willing to give up sex for one year if you knew it would give you a much deeper sense of peace than you have now?
- A good friend pulls off a well-conceived practical joke that plays on one of your foibles and makes you look ridiculous. How would you react?
- By controlling medical research funds, you are in the position to guarantee that a cure will be found in fifteen years for any disease you choose. Unfortunately, no progress on any others would be made during that period. Would you target one disease?
- Would you accept one year of life if it meant taking one year from the life of someone in the world selected at random? Would it matter if you were told whose life you had shortened?
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THESE SHOULD GENERATE SOME CONVERSATIONS
“The unexamined life is not worth living“
Socrates
With Christmas fast approaching I thought I’d post the third installment of An Examined Life. I found that some of these questions gave me pause. I really had to stop and consider some of my answers. See what you think.
- If you knew there would be a nuclear war in one week, what would you do?
- Would you accept 20 years of extraordinary happiness and fulfillment if it meant you would die at the end of that period.
- What is the greatest accomplishment of your life? Is there anything you hope to do that is even better?
- What was your most enjoyable dream? your worst nightmare?
- Would you give up half of what you now own for a pill that would permanently change you so that one hour of sleep each day would fully refresh you?
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- If you knew you could devote yourself to any single occupation – Music, writing, acting, business, politics, medicine, etc. – and be among the best and most successful in the world at it, what would you choose? If you knew you had only a 10% chance of being so successful, would you still put in the effort?
- What was your best experience with drugs or alcohol? your worst experience?
- If you went to a dinner party and were offered a dish you had never tried, would you want to taste it even if it sounded strange and not very appealing?
- To your close friends tend to be older or younger than you?
- If the person you were engaged to marry had an accident and became a paraplegic, would you go through with the marriage or back out?
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- Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire; after saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save one item. What would it be?
- How would you react if you were to learn that your mate had had a lover of the same sex before you knew each other?
- When were you last in a fight? What caused it and who won?
- You are being offered $1 million for the following acts: Before you are ten pistols – only one of which is loaded. You must pick up one of the pistols, point it at your forehead, and pull the trigger. If you walk away, you do so a millionaire. Would you accept the risk?
- Someone very close to you is in pain, paralyzed, and will die within a month He begs you to give him poison so that he can die. Would you? What if it was your father.
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5 SHOPPING DAYS LEFT
“The unexamined life is not worth living”
Socrates
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Last’s weeks installments created not only some discussion with my better-half but also with a number of readers. The general feeling was that it was an interesting process but disturbing once everyone started explaining their opinions. That’s a perfect reason to continue with these posts because the questions tend to get even more interesting as we proceed. Here are the next fifteen questions you can share with your spouse or partner. Have fun with it.
- If at birth you could select the profession your child would eventually pursue, would you do so?
- Would you be willing to become extremely ugly physically if it meant you would live for 1000 years at any physical age you choose?
- If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one ability or quality, what would it be?
- You have the chance to meet someone with you can have the most satisfying level imaginable – the stuff of dreams. Sadly, you know that in six months the person will die. Knowing the pain that would follow, would you still want to meet the person and fall in love? What if you knew your lover would not die, but instead would betray you?
- If you knew of a way to use your estate, following your death, could greatly benefit humanity, would you do it and leave only a minimal amount to your family?
- Do you prefer being around men or women? Do your closest friends tend to be men or women?
- If you could use a voodoo doll to hurt anyone you choose, would you?
- While on a trip to another city, your spouse or lover meets and spend the night with an exciting stranger. Given that they will never meet again, and that you will not otherwise learn of the incident, would you want your partner to tell you about? If roles were reversed, would you reveal what you had done?
- Are there people you envy enough to want to trade lives with them? Who are they?
- For an all-expense paid, one-week vacation anywhere in the world, would you be willing to kill a beautiful butterfly by pulling off its wings? What about stepping on a cockroach?
- Would you be willing to murder an innocent person if it would end hunger in the world?
- If God appeared to you in a series of vivid and moving dreams and told you to leave everything behind, travel alone to the Red Sea and become a fisherman, what would you do? What if you were told to sacrifice your child?
- What is your most treasured memory?
- Have you ever hated anyone? If so, why and for how long?
- With you rather be given $10,000 for your own use or $100,000 to give anonymously to strangers. What if you could keep $1 million or giveaway $20 million?
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Special thanks to Gregory Stock and Socrates.
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