Archive for the ‘vampires’ Tag

05/21/2022 “Choppers”   Leave a comment

Do you love going to the dentist like I do? I’ll bet you don’t, because most people would rather do anything than have strangers with their hands in your mouth drilling and poking and prodding and all of the associated fun of dental visits. I spent much more of my life in the dentist’s chair than I ever thought possible starting when I was 14 years old and had most of my front teeth knocked out while playing in a backyard football game. That was back in the day before mouthguards were even something anyone knew about, and it only cost me about six teeth and a lifetime of partial plates and dentist visits. You put forth what effort you must to maintain a reasonable appearance because as we all know bad teeth are not going to attract the opposite sex. Over the centuries there have been some strange superstitions about teeth. Some may be true and others ridiculous and here they are . . .

  • Don’t trust people with pointed teeth regardless of how charming they are! You never know, vampires traditionally have pointed teeth and it’s best not to take any chances.
  • People with obvious spaces between their teeth will be lucky, wealthy, and widely traveled. This was a common belief before orthodontists.
  • People who have well-placed teeth with no gaps have fine singing voices.
  • People with protruding teeth will live a short life. Remember, these were the days before braces.
  • Breaking a tooth is a sure sign a friend will die.
  • Those of you who have teeth with few cavities have a good deal of sexual strength. If you have teeth susceptible to cavities, you are prone to sexual weakness.
  • It’s bad luck to count the teeth of a baby. But if a baby is born with teeth, he or she will be a famous adult but only if you don’t count them.
  • It’s bad luck for a man with false teeth to marry a woman with false teeth. The marriage will be unhappy.
  • The ancients had a number of talismans to avoid a toothache. Split open a nutshell. Dig out the meat but be careful to keep the two halves intact. Put a dead spider in one half and close up the shell. Hang it around your neck on a string and you will never have another toothache.
  • Always carry a wolf’s tooth with you. You will never get a toothache.
  • Last but not least, if you cut your fingernails on a Friday, you will not have a toothache for a month.

There you have it, the wisdom of the ages concerning teeth. There’s only one thing I know for certain. If I had all of the money I’ve spent on my teeth, I could’ve bought that Lamborghini that remains on my bucket list.

KEEP SMILING

04/10/2022 “Weekly Quote”   Leave a comment

To believe everything is to be an imbecile.

To deny everything is to be a fool.”

Charles Nodier 1844

He was born at Besançon in France, near the border with Switzerland. His father, on the outbreak of the French Revolution, was appointed mayor of Besançon and consequently chief police magistrate. Charles was an influential French author and librarian who introduced a younger generation of Romanticists to the conte fantastique, gothic literature, and vampire tales. His dream related writings influenced many later authors.

11-19-2012   3 comments

I’ve always been an avid TV watcher from a very early age.  I come by it honestly since I was one of that first generation to be introduced to it at birth. I’ve always watched a lot of programming but there’s a recent trend that disturbs and annoys me.  I’ve read Bram Stoker’s Dracula many times and giving credit where credit is due, it was a scary and harmless story for any young kid to read.  When Bela Lugosi made the movie, it scared the shit out of an entire generation.  As  always it faded into history and we moved on.  To me this obsession with vampires, werewolves, and zombies is odd.  I’ve read the classics like The Wolfman and seen Romero’s Dawn of the Living Dead when it actually premiered.  It was a big deal at the time only because it was filmed in the Monroeville Mall in Monroeville, Pennsylvania, a twenty minute ride from my home.  We all went to see the movie but as most other movies it scared the crap out of us and then faded into history and we moved on.

The people who are salivating over Twilight are an enigma to me.  I understand erotic fantasies and how real they can become but c’mon.  Turning what once was a horrific movie and book anti-hero into everyone’s new love interest makes no sense to me.  We now have blood drinking vampire cults, bars where full costume is required, and the movement continues to grow.  Zombie this and zombie that is giving me an effing headache. Are things in this society so badly screwed up that escaping into the world of vampirism and zombies is the only way to go?  Thanks but no thanks.

Turning vampirism and blood sucking into an erotic sexual fantasy is beyond ridiculous.  The TV networks being true “blood suckers” in their own right have discovered “there’s gold in them thar vampires”, and are making millions by filling the air waves and movie theatre’s with more blood drinking heroes and heroines.  Even reality shows like “Sons of Gun’s” just had to have an episode where they created a weapon for zombie killing.  That episode took me from being a casual viewer of the show to a future no-show.

One of my all time favorite horror movies has always been Young Frankenstein.  I’d much rather have a huge belly laugh at the theatre and then go home to a warm bed and the woman I love instead of fantasizing sexually over ridiculous story lines and even more ridiculous characters.  To those of you who read this and get angry, save your breath, and then move on.

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