I did a lot of reminiscing today as I was leafing through many old files and folders from my early years a a police officer. As I reviewed these documents I was truly amazed just how much paperwork I still retained from those “good old days”. I found a few things that were really old but still really funny. The following statements were supplied to actual police officer’s and were copied directly from their official accident reports. As always the truth is stranger than fiction.

WOMEN

• “I thought I could squeeze between two trucks when my car became smashed.”

• “A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.”

• “I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision. I did not see the other car.”

• “A invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my vehicle and then vanished.”

• “I was taking my canary to the hospital. It got loose in the car and flew out the window. The next thing I saw was his rear end and there was a crash.”

🚘🚓🚛

MEN

• “I saw the slow moving, sad faced, old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car.”

• “A truck backed into my windshield into my wife’s face.”

• “In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.”

• “The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.”

• “The other car attempted to cut in front of me, so I, with my right front bumper, removed his left rear tail light.”

• “When I saw I could not avoid a collision, I stepped on the gas and crashed into the other car.”

🚗🚘🚙

Welcome to the OMG club. Now you’ve heard it all too.

DRIVE SAFELY LOL