How about I just throw a little of everything your way on this fine Friday morning. I’ll start with a few apparently unedited newspaper headlines. I certainly hope the editors that approved these don’t get paid too much.

War Dims Hope for Peace

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges!

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

If Strike Isn’t Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile

Next on my list for today are a few retro bumper stickers. They seem to make more sense than these headlines did.

I Don’t Break for Pedestrians

Learn From Your Parents Mistakes-Use Birth Control

I’m Not a Complete Idiot-Some Parts are Missing

He Who Laughs Last Thinks Slowest

See, I told you they were better than the headlines. And last but not least, a quote you should be glad you didn’t make. I’m not a fan of either Nancy Pelosi or Barabara Boxer but the award for the stupidest quote goes to Barabara. She won by a nose.

“Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, “Thank God I’m still alive.” But of course, those who died – their lives will never be the same again.”

CALIFORNIA IS SO PROUD