There was an old fellow named Bill,
Who swallowed an atomic pill;
His navel corroded,
His asshole exploded,
And they found both his nuts in Brazil.
There was an old fellow named Bill,
Who swallowed an atomic pill;
His navel corroded,
His asshole exploded,
And they found both his nuts in Brazil.
Many years ago a girl I once knew,
Was in desperate need of a screw.
Not too hard to find, someone who is kind,
And would bang her till she was black and blue.
But who??
A diminutive maiden name Hilda,
Had a date with a top body-builder;
He said that he should,
That he could and he would,
And he did – and it damn near killed her!
A bit of a nuisance named Liam,
Said: ” The best bits are tits, when you see’em.
But they’re usually trapped,
Cupped, wired and strapped.
So I make it my mission to free’em.
An engaging young filly named Sally,
Who enjoys the occasional dally,
Will sit on the lap
Of a well-endowed chap,
And declare: “Ooh, you’re right up my alley!”
Said a lecherous fellow named Shea,
When his prick would not rise for a lay:
“You must seize it, and squeeze it,
And tease it, and please it.”
Adding: ” Rome wasn’t built in a day!”
There was a young stud from Missouri
Who screwed with astonishing fury,
Till taken to court
For his vigorous sport,
And condemned by a poorly hung jury.
A pretty young maiden named Flo
Said “I hate to be had in the snow,
While I’m normally hot,
In this spot I’m not –
So, as soon as you come Bert, lets go!”
“I cannot be bothered with drawers,”
Insists one of our better-known whores;
“There isn’t much doubt
I do better without
In conducting my everyday chores.”
My dear, you looked simply divine,
And I know that we’ll get along fine;
For making ends meet
Will be such a treat,
When one end is yours and one mine.