Archive for the ‘las vegas’ Tag
As I was rummaging through my collection of books I discovered one I forgot I had. It was buried beneath a pile of other useless information. It’s called Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader and I gave it a quick read. Being a former cop and an employee of the Maine Criminal Justice System, I tend to read things about the courts and laws before anything else and I’m glad I did. The Bathroom Reader made me aware of some strange and ridiculous laws from around the country. Here are just a few.
- The law prohibits barbers in Omaha, Nebraska, from shaving the chests of customers.
- In St. Louis Missouri, it’s illegal for you to drink beer out of a bucket while you’re sitting on a curb.
- In cotton Valley, Louisiana, law forbids cows and horses from sleeping in a bakery.
- The maximum penalty for double parking in Minneapolis, Minnesota, is working on a chain gang with nothing to eat but bread and water.
- In the state of Alabama, it’s illegal to play dominoes on a Sunday.
- In Las Vegas Nevada, it’s against the law to pawn your dentures.
- If your 88 years of age or older, it’s illegal for you to ride your motorcycle in Idaho Falls, Idaho.
- In California, it’s illegal to hunt whales from your automobile. It’s also against the law to use your dirty underwear as a dust rag.
- It’s illegal to sleep with your boots on in Tulsa, Oklahoma.
- In Natoma, Kansas it’s illegal to throw knives at men wearing striped suits.
These 10 items are mild compared to some of the others I’ve seen over the years. We Americans are great at passing a law after law but very lax in eliminating silly crap like this from the rolls. I’m going to make an effort to finds a few that are even crazier than the ones you just read.
CRIMINAL JUSTICE, MY ASS
Well, for a change its a sunny Fall morning here in Maine. Everyone is out enjoying the sunshine because they know within a few weeks we could be seeing snow. Every so often in the month of October we get the first snowfall of the year which explains why today I’ll be preparing my snowblower for action. I’m moving in slow motion today after yesterday’s dose of hospitals, doctors, and nurses. It’s a real buzz kill to return to the medical community even for a short time but on the plus side my CT scan was completed without incident. Hopefully I’ll have good results sometime today. Since it’s going to be a slow day I thought I’d offer up a few tidbits of trivia for all of you trivia addicts out there. Here they are . . .
- In the 19th century, the British Navy attempted to dispel the superstition that Friday was an unlucky day to embark on a ship. The keel of a new ship was laid on a Friday, she was named the HMS Friday, commanded by a Captain Friday, and finally went to sea on a Friday. Neither the ship nor crew were ever heard from again.
- In the film Star Trek- First Contact, when Picard shows Lilly she is orbiting Earth, Australia and Papa New Guinea are clearly visible but New Zealand is missing.
- In the United States there is one birth every 8 seconds and one death every 14 seconds.
- It has been calculated that in the last 3500 years, there have only been 230 years of peace throughout the civilized world.
- It is believed that Shakespeare was 46 around the time that the King James version of the Bible was written. In Psalms 46, the 46th word from the first word is “shake” and the 46 word from the last word is “spear”.
- Jean-Claude Van Damme was the alien in the original Predator movie in almost all of the jumping and climbing scenes.
- Lady Astor once told Winston Churchill “If you were my husband, I would poison your coffee”. His reply, “If you were my wife I would drink it”.
- Lorne Greene had one of his nipples bitten off by an alligator while he was the host of Lorne Greene’s Wild Kingdom.
- In 1980, a Las Vegas hospital suspended workers for betting on when patients would die.
So there you have it, another dose of useless (but interesting) information. . There will be a posting of a limerick later in the day, this one may be rated “R” rather than my normal “PG”. Hope you enjoy it.
DISLIKE HOSPITALS AND DOCTORS . . . GIVE ME A NURSE ANYTIME
If I sound a little happy today there’s a good reason. I just dropped my better-half at the Portland Jetport (that’s Maine’s way of saying airport) and she’s winging her way to the left coast for a week of fun and frolic with her son. They have quite the trip planned that includes a drive to Las Vegas to see a few shows and lose a few dollars. As I ‘m writing this she should just be landing at O’Hare in Chicago. Then she’s off to LA LA land to enjoy the sunny weather, the warm ocean, and a host of diverse weirdo’s. She should be able to teach them a thing or two about what weirdness is really all about because she’s a pro.
“Remember honey, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.”
It’s a vacation for her but it’s also one for yours truly. A total week of no C&W music blaring throughout the house and no one constantly looking over my shoulder. Besides, just mentioning that little tidbit is sure to get a rise out of her. Just to make sure she doesn’t get too upset with my sarcasm I thought I should roam the Internet to collect a few expert opinions and quotations on vacationing separately.
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Taking time alone is a positive sign that the spouses are acknowledging and honoring each other’s careers and likes.
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Taking separate vacations enables a person to understand that spending too much time together may hurt any relationship. “A couple needs time apart as much as time together.”
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“What makes a relationship juicy and exciting are the different perspectives and experiences we bring to it. You need the separateness to appreciate the togetherness.”
In my humble opinion these quotations are almost word for word what I was thinking all along. I’m glad I found an expert or two who were able to word it just the way I was thinking it (sarcasm off).
I see a week of total relaxation. Also, this week will be clothing-optional around the house because I’m in total agreement with good old Benjamin Franklin who was an advocate of what he called "air baths". Amen to that Ben!
I plan on hitting the beach here in Maine a few times and should have quite the collection of photo’s to show for it.
“Remember honey, what happens in Maine also stays in Maine.” LOL
For now the cat and I will spend a great deal of time relaxing on the deck. I’ll be reading a book or two and he’ll be chasing the occasional bird or squirrel. He’s pretty lazy and will probably just end up napping the entire week away in any one of his numerous sleeping spots.
I may break out the margaritas one night and make some smoking hot tacos with a side of salsa or maybe even some kimchee. Eat and drink until I drop then climb into a hot bath with a glass of really good brandy. Now that’s what I call a vacation.
I’d like to keep writing but it’s the first night of my vacation and I want to relax and enjoy it. I may even dig into my bag of fireworks and wake up the damn neighbors in the wee hours of the morning. After all it’s Fourth of July week and I intend to celebrate that birthday all week.
FLY YOUR FLAG PROUDLY
&
HAVE FUN LOVEY
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