Archive for the ‘stupid’ Tag

02-10-2016 Journal – February is Boring!   3 comments

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February it seems is a rather boring and utterly useless month.  It’s two biggest holidays are Groundhog Day and Valentines Day which says a lot about relevance to me.

It’s such a slow short month that all of our overpaid politicians are forced into action to show the electorate they’ll actually are doing something, even if it’s in February. I can’t list all of the observance that have been piled up into the shortest month of the year because there are just too damn many. The following partial list contains a few weekly observances for this week that will help make my point.

Celebration of Love Week: 7-13th

Children of Alcoholics Week: 7-13th

Congenital Heart Defect Awareness Week: 7-14th

Dump Your Significant Jerk Week: 7-13th

Have A Heart for A Chained Dog Week: 7-14th

Jell-O Week: 7-13th

National Secondhand Wardrobe Week: 7-13th

Love Makes the World Go Round; But, Laughter Keeps Us From Getting Dizzy Week: 8-14th

I can just see and hear a group of politicos sitting in a local tavern on any given Friday night telling war stories to each other concerning all of their weeks accomplishments. "I finally got that ‘Dump Your Jerk Week’ observance passed. It’s been a year of hard work getting it pushed through and I was forced to call in all of my IOU’s to do it. It was exhausting work but someone had to finally get it done."  His buddy sitting nearby had to do a little one-upmanship, "I had a tough week too. That observance of ‘Love Makes the World Go Round; But, Laughter Keeps Us From Getting Dizzy Week’ was a killer. I spent six months arm twisting damn near everyone to get it passed. The United States is now a better place for it." 

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I found only two daily observance for February 10th and they are just as stupid.  I had to look up the word PLIMSOLL to discover it’s some sort of an athletic shoe. Who knew?

Plimsoll Day

All The News That’s Fit To Print Day

So a great big THANK YOU goes out to those geniuses responsible for cluttering up our lives with more useless crap.  We shouldn’t be allowed to vote until we’ve been made to review all of these stupid observances to find out what politicians are responsible for them.

AND THANKS TO NH FOR KICKING HILLARY’S ASS.

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03-25-2015 Journal – A Little Useless Info!   Leave a comment

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I just finished allowing the federal government and the IRS to peek into my business as they so love to do.  The only people worse than them is Google.  I figure in just a few years Google will take over the entire earth and make information slaves of us all.  But that’s a topic for another day.

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Each and every time I file a tax return I become moody, disrespectful, and rebellious and today is no different.  I’m not motivated to do do much else so you will be inundated with a truckload of useless crap.  I haven’t done this for some time so all complaints will be trash-canned.

Here goes nothing . . . .

  • The first name of of TV detective Lieutenant Columbo was Phillip.
  • The Flintstones lawyer who never lost a case was called Perry Masonry.
  • Rita Hayworth’s real name was Margarita Cansino.
  • Spencer Tracy said he would only take the part of the Penquin in the Batman TV series if he were allowed to kill Batman.
  • Sylvester Stallone used to sweep the lion cages in New York’s Central Park Zoo to pay his way while trying to break into acting.
  • Sean Connery once worked as a coffin polisher.

Are you captivated yet with this stream of meaningless nonsense. Don’t get up and walk away because I have a few more tidbits.

  • After Harrison Ford’s brief 1966 appearance as a bell-boy in Dead Heat on a Merry-Go-Round he was told, “Kid, you aint got it.”
  • Johnny Mathis dubbed Miss Piggy’s singing voice in The Muppet Movie.
  • Liquid Paper was invented by the mother of Mike Nesmith of Monkee fame.
  • Don McLean’s song “American Pie” is not named after the plane in which Buddy Holly died – the plane had no name, only a registration number: N3794N.
  • Popeye’s girlfriend, Olive Oyl, wore a size 14A shoe.
  • The Muppet Show was banned from TV in Saudi Arabia because one of it’s stars was Miss Piggy. Pigs are forbidden to Muslims.

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And in keeping with the upcoming tax day . . .

Americans Use Sixteen Thousand Tons of Aspirin Each Year.

01-20-2015–January Daily Observances!   Leave a comment

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‘This doesn’t fall in January but I like it anyway.”

We all love observances or so it seems.  I’ve never seen or understood why they’re so necessary.  It seems that if more than three people get together and agree on  something it immediately becomes necessary to make the entire country aware of it. So they submit a request to one of our overpaid and more times than not incompetent politicians requesting a day be set forth for a celebration of their oh so important subject. 

Politicians who are consumed with getting reelected will prostitute themselves in any way for recognition, no matter how stupid or inane the request might be.   Since January and February are such slow months they seem to have plenty of time on their hands for these Monthly, Weekly,  and Daily observances.  A small portion seem reasonable but the vast majority are just so much fluff and utter nonsense. This post will be my PSA (Public Service Announcement) for the first quarter of this year.  The following list contains only a portion of the large number of daily observances for January.  Some are funny, most are stupid, and some I have no idea what they mean or what they’re meant to accomplish. 

  • Asarah B’Tevet Day: 1  A SHOULDER SHRUG AND PUZZLED LOOK HERE.
  • Euro Day: 1  WHO REALLY CARES?
  • First Foot Day: 1
  • New Year’s Dishonor List Day: 1   
  • Z Day: 1  WHO KNOWS WHAT THIS IS FOR?
  • Happy Mew Year for Cats Day: 2 SO FREAKING LAME.
  • Drinking Straw Day: 3
  • Fruitcake Toss Day: 3  THIS MIGHT BE REFERRING TO THE POLITICIANS.
  • *Memento Mori "Remember You Die" Day: 3
  • Dimpled Chad Day: 4  ANOTHER DEMOCRAT FROM FLORIDA I’LL BET.
  • Tom Thumb Day: 4
  • Bird Day: 5  I’VE GOT A BIRD FOR THEM RIGHT HERE.
  • "Thank God It’s Monday" Day: 5
  • I’m Not Going To Take It Anymore Day: 7
  • National Tempura Day: 7

The list continues but I promise you they don’t get any better.  The further along we go the worse it seems to get. 

  • Argyle Day: 8
  • Bubble Bath Day: 8
  • National English Toffee Day: 8
  • National Bubble Bath Day: 8
  • National Joy Germ Day: 8
  • Balloon Ascension Day: 9
  • National Cassoulet Day: 9  I HAVE NO CLUE ON THIS ONE.
  • National Static Electricity Day: 9
  • Learn Your Name in Morse Code Day: 11  THIS IS SOOO CRUCIAL.
  • No Pants Subway Ride Day: 11  THIS SHOULD BE A NEW YORK HOLIDAY.
  • Kiss A Ginger (Red Heads) Day: 12  THOUGHT UP BY A PISSED OFF RED HEAD.
  • Rubber Duckie Day: 13
  • Caesarean Section Day: 14  WHO WANTS TO CELEBRATE THIS?
  • Dress Up Your Pet Day: 14  TO STUPID TO BE BELIEVED.

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‘Is there a ribbon for Stupid?”

I just wonder how much time is wasted by our overpaid politicians to process these stupid requests and present them for an official vote.  What special interest groups could some of these possibly represent?

  • Appreciate A Dragon Day: 16
  • Fig Newton Day: 16
  • International Fetish Day: 16  A FAVORITE OF MOST POLITICIANS.
  • Nothing Day: 16  AMEN TO THIS.
  • Tu B’shuvt: 16  HAVEN’T A CLUE.
  • Cable Car Day: 17
  • Tin Can Day: 19
  • Penguin Awareness Day: 20
  • National Disc Jockey Day: 20
  • Squirrel Appreciation Day: 21  THIS IS NUTS.

I know, I know, it’s also hard for me to believe that this partial list continues on.  Just be glad I didn’t list everything else that I found for January or you’d be reading for another twenty minutes.

  • Answer Your Cat’s Questions Day: 22 IF YOUR CAT ANSWERS GIVE ME A CALL.

I find it really interesting and ironic that the following two observances fall on the same day.

  • Celebration of Life Day: 22 
  • Roe vs. Wade Day: 22

Back to the last few entries for this embarrassing display of political patronage and political correctness.

  • Snowplow Mailbox Hockey Day: 23  I CELEBRATE THIS DAY AFTER EVERY SNOW STORM.
  • Beer Can Day: 24  MY BETTER-HALF IS THE POSTER GIRL ON THIS ONE.
  • Talk Like A Grizzled Prospector Day: 24
  • Bubble Wrap Appreciation Day: 26
  • National Kazoo Day: 28  HERE’S ONE MORE THING TO HUM ON.
  • Inane Answering Message Day: 30
  • Appreciate Your Social Security Check Day: 31 

That’s it for today.  You now know way more about January observances than you’ve ever wanted.   I deeply apologize but I feel these days must be recognized and celebrated because our politicians say so. NOT!!!

06-25-2014 New Year’s Resolutions Mid-Year Update!   2 comments

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A few days I ago my better-half and I were sitting in a local restaurant chatting up one of her co-workers.  During that conversation her friend casually asked me if  I’d made any New Year’s Resolutions. I can’t remember exactly why she asked but I answered with a yes.  Obviously she’s never read this blog because I post them every January for all to see.

We returned home and during the ride I decided to check the archives and do a mid-year review of my resolutions for 2014 just to see how I’ve been doing.  Let’s start with this one:

1.  Read five books a month.

So far I’m on track with this resolution even though I lost my Kindle reader on my trip to Texas.  Now that I’m able to once again read my Kindle books from three additional devices I should have no trouble successfully completing this one.

2.  Teach the grandson  one curse word per month once he begins talking.

I think I jumped the gun on this one because he has yet to start speaking clearly enough to begin cursing.  I may have to wait for 2015 to get this one accomplished.  This one is a big FAIL so far.

3.  Keep the number of F-bombs below 100 a week.

So far I’m succeeding on this one but just barely. For the year it will be too close to call since it’s difficult not to use my  favorite word at every opportunity.  The question isn’t using it too much, it’s having too many reasons to use it at all.  If people aggravated me less this one would be a snap.

 

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4.  Drink less brandy than last year but more than next year.

I’m doing well on this one thanks to my weight loss program.  I’ve pretty much given up drinking the hard stuff and have returned to sipping the occasional glass of wine.  Boring but healthier.

5.  Spend less than $300.00 at Dunkin Donut for the entire year ($25.00 per month).

Since we purchased the K-Kup coffee maker I’ve cut my Dunkin Donut spending by two thirds.  I can make excellent coffee at home now and not be forced to spend two dollars a cup elsewhere.  Hooray for me.

6.  Stop dancing naked near the picture window in the living room. It scares the neighbors if their complaints mean anything at all.

I seem to be failing miserably on this one.  I just can’t seem to keep my clothes on and may have flashed my new and smaller ass to the neighbors and a few lucky passersby. I’m trying to behave but I suspect this will be a FAIL once again.  One of my better-half’s resolutions is  to buy and install window coverings this year but I haven’t seen them yet. I wonder how much the neighbors will complain if they never get to see my ass again.

7.  Fight to my last breath to keep chickens and goats from becoming part of my life.

I’m crossing my fingers on this one for now.  The better-half has been putting serious pressure on me to get chickens and goats. The negotiations have progressed to where she’s agreeing to no goats if we can just get a few chickens.  My negotiating position has remained the same from the beginning – NO FREAKING GOATS OR CHICKENS.  For this year I will accomplish this resolution but I’m losing the battle little by little.

If I counted correctly, I’m keeping up with five of my seven resolutions but I suspect I may lose some ground during the remainder of 2014.  The road to hell really is paved with good intentions.

How are you doing with yours?

Do you even care?

Probably not!

04-11-2014 Cellular Love & Marriage   1 comment

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I consistently ask myself questions about the things I see.  It’s not that I’m seeing these things that bothers me, it’s that I don’t entirely understand what I’m seeing.  One of the things that confuses me the most are the situations I see developing these days between people and their cell phones.

I’ll try to explain clearly where I’m coming from in order to keep any confusion to a minimum. After being held hostage by Verizon Wireless for the last seven years I made the bold move of dumping their service and stepping back three or four technological paces to something far simpler and inexpensive. I won’t get into the particulars except to say I’ve cut my monthly costs by 70%.  I don’t want you to think I hate cell phones because I don’t.  What I do hate is the unhealthy hold those devices seem to have on such a large portion of our population.

Next, I need to state emphatically my total and complete support for both heterosexual and homosexual marriages.  No, my mind isn’t wandering but hang in there a moment or two until I explain.  I object strongly to the new wave of intimate relationships I’m observing between humans and cellphones. It’s becoming a little embarrassing to see these phones being cuddled and stroked by both men and women in public places. It’s a bit disgusting. 

People buying their phones cutesy little bejeweled outfits in a variety of colored covers to keep things from getting too boring.  Even the kids are getting into the act with little or no parental oversight.  Sitting along in their rooms at night talking quietly on the phone, roaming the Internet until all  hours of the morning, and posting "selfies" to the world that would in some cases make a porn star blush.

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Those phones are coddled and babied and remain all snuggly in a pocket or purse held tightly next to the heart (or other body parts) of their owners.  I know many women and even a few men who would like nothing better than to have a large device vibrating in their pocket.  People just can’t seem to keep their hands off their phones and don’t even try. What’s next?  The formation of political special interest groups to promote our freedom to marry our cellphones?  Don’t laugh, as weird as things are these days,  it could happen. 

Cell phone ownership is becoming almost as intimate as a marriage.  First you need to find that “soulmate” or should I say “cell-mate”.  It must be attractive and shapely and have all of those attributes you’re looking for.  Once you’ve found that perfect match then your required to enter into a contract for a two year period.  Very similar to a marriage license if you ask me but with one additional advantage.  When your cell-mate gets a little older, all scratched up, and the battery starts to fail you can dump it and sign up for an upgrade. If you dare decide to end the relationship before the contract is up your forced to pay and pay dearly for that right.  Sounds just like a divorce I managed to survive twenty years ago.

I guess I just haven’t met my true "cell-mate" yet.  I suppose it will happen all of a sudden like a lightning bolt and I’ll be lost forever in that wonderful haze of first love, sexting something juicy for the first time, or sending an HD photo of some of my body parts to people who don’t want to see them.

You just gotta love those cell-phones.  Right Lovey.

02-06-2014 Stupid Questions = Stupid Answers   Leave a comment

All of my life I’ve been curious about things.  I suppose that was the trait that drew me to a career in investigations.  I hate having unanswered questions and when I find one it makes me a little crazy.  They stick with me until I can resolve the question with a logical answer.  I’ve also found over the years that there are thousands of questions that have no logical answers,  Some people might call them stupid but that doesn’t change the fact that they need to be answered.

Over time I’ve reviewed lists from others and made lists of my own with questions that no one  can or will answer.  Here’s a small collection of a few of them that will get you thinking a bit.  If you have answers let me know but  I’m willing to bet you won’t be any more successful than I’ve been.

Here goes nothing . . . . .

    • What’s another word for synonym?
    • Where are Preparations A through G?
    • Whose cruel idea was it for the word “lisp” to have an “s” in it?
    • Why are there flotation devices under airplane seats instead of parachutes?
    • Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
    • Why are toe nail clippers bigger than finger nail clippers?
    • Why do most cars have speedometers that go up to at least 130?
    • Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
    • Why is it that when a person tells you there’s over a million stars in the universe you believe them, but if someone tells you there’s wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
    • Why is it good to be a Daddy’s girl, but bad to be a Momma’s boy?

  • Is it possible for someone to be a closet claustrophobic?
  • Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
  • Why do people who only eat natural foods drink decaffeinated coffee?
  • Why is a women’s prison called a penal colony?
  • You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can’t they make the whole plane out of the same material?
  • Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM’s? And secondly, way is it placed where the driver can reach it?
  • If you google “Google” will your computer get stuck in a loop?
  • Why do the walk signs only stay green long enough to allow pedestrians  to get to the middle of the street?
  • Why do people say heads up when you should duck?
  • What do you say when someone says you’re in denial, but you’re not?

  • Why do the numbers on a phone go one way and the numbers on the calculator go the other?
  • Why do British people never sound British when they sing?
  • Why is the name of the phobia for the fear of long words Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia?
  • What ever happened to an E grade? We have A,B,C,D,F but no E.
  • Why do people never say “it’s only a game” when they’re winning?
  • Did Adam and Eve have navels?
  • Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog’s face he gets mad at you?
    But when you take him in a car, he sticks his head out the window!
  • How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
  • How come you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?
  • How is it possible to have a civil war?

  • If a chronic liar tells you he is a chronic liar do you believe him?
  • If an orange is orange, why isn’t a lime called a green or a lemon called a yellow?
  • If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan?
  • If superglue is so good, why doesn’t it stick to the side of the tube?
  • If you can’t drink and drive, why do you need a driver’s license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots?
  • Why do hotdogs come in packs of 8 when hotdog rolls come in packs of 10?
  • Why don’t you ever see baby pigeons?
  • What happens if you get scared half-to-death twice?
  • What happens when you call a 1-800 number collect?
  • What should you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant?

All interesting questions but very few answers that make any sense at all.  Life can be so challenging at times.

02-05-2014 Journal Entry – What is funny?   Leave a comment

I’ve always felt I was the kind of person who had a really good sense of humor.  I love good jokes, limericks or just about anything that will make me laugh. I also enjoy making people laugh and I’ve always have at my beck-and-call any number of jokes, quips, and sayings that helped me do that.

Most of my really close friends over the years have been people with a well-developed sense of humor who weren’t afraid to laugh at themselves. I’m a big believer that self-deprecating humor is by far the best and I practice it myself on many occasions. I love humor but I hate the kind that’s used to embarrass or degrade anyone.

One of my biggest problems is my inability to remember jokes. I’ve had friends that after a few drinks could tell jokes for two hours without taking a breath. The more they drank the more jokes they remembered and the funnier they became. That’s what I call a damn party. Unfortunately those kinds of people are few and far between these days or so it seems.  Maybe it’s just me and I’m running in the wrong circles.

It also seems that a great many people claim to have little or no sense of humor. These are people that take themselves and their jobs way too seriously.  They wear their lack of humor like a badge of honor at times and I just can’t wrap my head around that kind of thinking. What I’m trying to say as gently as possible is that if you have no sense of humor you’re probably boring as hell and about as much fun to be with as getting an STD.

I’m always on the lookout for people who love to laugh. Those are the people I want in my life and to spend time with to enjoy some quick-witted repartee. People who take themselves too seriously are no fun and it’s double trouble when they’re relatives. I remember being told a long time ago that “you can pick your nose, you can pick your friend’s nose, but you can’t pick your relatives.” It remains true today.

So this morning as I was surfing the Net I discovered websites that were actually dedicated to what have been termed “unfunny” or “anti-jokes. What kind of person takes time out of their busy day and a great deal of time each week in maintaining and promoting a website that’s totally effing ridiculous. These are supposedly jokes that are so unfunny that they become funny. Statements like that  irritate the crap out of me and people making those statements must assume we’re all as dumb as they look.

Here are few samples of these anti-jokes and even after reading through hundreds of them, I just don’t see the point. Life is way too short to spend time with this nonsense. I’ll give you a few examples and then I’m going to walk away and never look back on this posting or their stupid web sites ever again.

  • Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
    Because he was hit by a bus.
  • Roses are red,
    Violets are blue.
    I have a gun.
    Get in the van.
  • An Irishman walks out of a bar.
    What’s green and has wheels?                                                                   Grass, I lied about the wheels.
  • A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
  • What would George Washington do if he were alive today?
    Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.
  • A horse walked into a bar. Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation.
  • What is the biggest lie in the entire universe?
    ” I have read and agree to the Terms of Service”
  • A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park.

Well, do you think they’re stupid and offensive or is it  just me.  Maybe they do appeal to you and if so,  you have my sincerest sympathies.  I need laughter in my life from humor that is funny. It can be dark and morbid and still be hilarious.  But to quote one of my favorite comedians, Ron White, “You just can’t fix stupid”.

LAUGH A LITTLE TODAY

02-02-2014 Happy Ground Hog Day!   2 comments

The groundhog is like most other prophets; it delivers its prediction and then disappears.  ~Bill Vaughn

Today is one of my favorite stupid and senseless holidays.  It’s one that was cooked up by a bunch of German immigrants  from Pennsylvania many years ago.  As I’ve explained in years past, I’ve had an up-close and personal relationship with “Phil” and all of the nonsense that takes place in Punxatawney, PA.

It’s a tongue-in-cheek celebration to the entire world except for a few idiot local politician’s looking to get some face-time on the news.  Even a groundhog is smart enough to know that there’ll be six more weeks of winter when it’s only freaking February.

As I surfed around today I found a web page that must be having a really slow month when it published the following  list of eleven reasons why we should be celebrating this auspicious occasion.

11. It’s on nearly every calendar.

10. Helps relieve cabin fever.

9. Spring or not, it’s six weeks till St Urho’s Day.

8. Forecast is no less reliable than the National Weather Service.

7. At least one of them critters is bound to see things your way.

6. Valentine’s Day is too depressing for nerds.

5. Unlike the Easter bunny, he keeps his dirty paws outside.

4. As they used to say on radio: “The Shadow knows”.

3. It’s fun to say “Punxsutawney”.

2. If a rodent can bring us an early spring, more power to him.

1. In Minnesota, either way we come out ahead.

Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you.  ~Maori Proverb

I apologize if you nodded off midway through that list.  I’m not saying I could have done better but OMG.  I think the author might have reconsidered that list when both of his hands fell asleep as he typed it. They were that bored. It is just a real yawner . . . . .

“The trouble with weather forecasting is that it’s right too often for us to ignore it and wrong too often for us to rely on it.”  ~Patrick Young

I know that many of you think Groundhog Day is lame but this year the impossible finally happened to make it unlame.  Some NFL genius scheduled the Superbowl on Ground Hog Day just so they could steal some of good old “Punxatawney Phil’s” thunder. It’s just those damn sports fanatics attempting to glom on to Phil’s fan base. Just a shameless maneuver on their part.

HAPPY GROUND HOG DAY EVERYONE

SEATTLE RULES!!

01-17-2014 Journal Entry–Aging!   Leave a comment

You know, there is a time in your life when you’re forced to deal with getting older.  It’s a little difficult because mentally we all still feel like we’re in our twenties.  As in growing up there’s a process that you must experience and when growing down (aging) you must again go through a somewhat similar but more depressing process, like it or not.  I think it’s just a way for us to slowly over time confront and accept the reality of our mortality.

It really began to bother me a few years ago when I received an email from a former high school class president requesting I attend my 45th high school reunion.  I read the email and never seriously thought about attending.  You see, I hated high school and really had no desire to see any of my former classmates.  I had two close friends during those years and both  have passed away. The first died just months after graduation in a nasty car accident and the second died about twelve years ago during liver transplant surgery. Any old girlfriends with their accompanying sexual adventures have long since been forgotten.

I was given a webpage to visit created by my old classmates that had updated information on just about everyone in the class.  I took a look around the site and the only thing that caught my eye was the death list.  It was a huge shock to see that almost forty percent of my graduating class had passed away.  It was surprising but not totally unexpected.  I adjusted over time to the shock and began to deal with the reality of it.  I never attended any of my class reunions that were held over the years because I preferred to remember my classmates as they were and not be slapped in the face with the new reality of what they are now.  Too damn depressing.

Time goes on and age continues to creep up on you.  You can see and feel the physical changes as they occur and you adjust.  Aches and pains continue to worsen and again you adjust.  You spend a great deal of your life adjusting to changes that you knew were coming but really didn’t take all that seriously. It’s a slow and never-ending shadow in the back of your mind that you try to ignore but can’t.  Every time you have a quiet moment it pops up to let you know the process is continuing.

You’re probably wandering what prompted this depressing monologue so let me explain.  Yesterday I was given some news that at first didn’t shock or surprise me but later kept coming back to haunt me.  My ex-wife of many years had remarried shortly after our divorce and had given birth to a son. We’d been divorced a couple of years but she still made the effort to meet with me because she wanted to introduce me to the boy.  She and I had tried for years to have children but could not.  We met for just a few brief minutes and I held the little guy in my arms for just an instant. Before I knew it they were gone and I never saw either of them again.  That little baby boy now 31 years old had just died from a lethal drug overdose.

Life as always goes on but it was just another reminder of how quickly and easily life can be taken from us.  Sorry about the depressing post but I needed to tell someone about it. No one is exempt from this aging process and I’ve done my part to remind all of you of that fact. Live your life to the fullest every blessed day.  It could end tomorrow.

01-16-2014 Celebrities – Real of Fake?   Leave a comment

You must have gathered by now, I’m not a big fan of celebrities. Most celebrities just aren’t worth my time and effort to write about them. I’m not saying all of them are fake but a vast majority appear to be. I do understand that some of them, and I do mean “SOME”, are talented in various disciplines and that I do appreciate. My biggest complaint is their effect on the culture with their stupid and uninformed opinions and thoughts. They may have talent and fame but it doesn’t make them any smarter than the rest of us.  They allow themselves to be used by politicians to affect the vote in ways that I disagree with. Their influence among our younger generations with silly and sometimes stupid statements causes more problems than it solves.  Here’s a few examples of these fine upstanding citizens and the things they say and think.

  • “Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life.”
    – Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign.
  • “Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can’t help but cry. I mean I’d love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff.”  – Mariah Carey
  • “Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country.” – Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC
  • “I’ve never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don’t like eating fish. And I know that’s very popular out there in Africa.” — Britney Spears
  • “I’m not anorexic. I’m from Texas. Are there people from Texas that are anorexic? I’ve never heard of one. And that includes me.” — Jessica Simpson
  • “I am convinced that by eating biological foods it is possible to avoid a tumor.” – Gwyneth Paltrow
  • “It’s OK to have beliefs, just don’t believe in them.” – Guy Ritchie
  • “What’s Walmart, do they like make walls there?” – Paris Hilton
  • “When I pictured heroin, I pictured some crazy crack-head with no shoes under a bridge. You never think that is going to be you. And it never was me. I was never under a bridge, and I always had shoes. – Nicole Richie
  • “If we do everything right, if we do it with absolute certainty, there’s still a 30% chance we’re going to get it wrong.” – Joe Biden
  • “It’s really hard to maintain a one-on-one relationship if the other person is not going to allow me to be with other people.” – Axl Rose
  • “All of the sudden, you’re like the Bin Laden of America. Osama Bin Laden is the only one who knows what I’m going through.” – R. Kelly

These are the role models our younger generations look up to and attempt to emulate. I always thought that the obsession with celebrities faded as we aged but I was wrong.  I recall years ago teasing my seventy year old mother when she said she would have thrown her panties on stage for Tom Jones.  Same obsession, different approach.

I guess I just dislike fake people.  If you’re a great singer or actor with loads of talent why change your name.  Stand up, be proud, and be who you really are.  Here’s a list of just a few celebrities who’ve been convinced by the Hollywood types to not just change their names but to remove their real identities as people.  This is a very small sampling of this nonsense.

Pat Benatar = Patricia Andrejewski
Bono  = Paul Hewson
Alice Cooper = Vincent Funnier
Elvis Costello = Declan Patrick McManus
Tom Cruise = Thomas Cruise Mapother IV
Vin Diesel = Mark Vincent
Kathie Lee Gifford = Kathie Epstein
Whoopie Goldberg = Caryn Johnson
Ice Cube = Oshea Jackson
Ice-T = Tracy Morrow
Elton John = Reginald Dwight
Wynonna Judd = Christina Ciminella
Queen Latifah = Dana Owens
Courtney Love = Michelle Harrison
Elle MacPherson = Eleanor Gow
Barry Manilow = Barry Alan Pincus
Marilyn Manson = Brian
Demi Moore = Demetria Guynes
Joan Rivers = Joan Sandra Molinsky
Johnny Rotten (Sex Pistols) = John Lydon
Winona Ryder = Winona Horowitz
Susan Sarandon = Susan Tomaling
Jane Seymour = Joyce Franked berg
Sting = Gordon Sumner
Randy Travis = Randy Traywick
Sid Vicious = John Simon Ritchie
Raquel Welch = Raquel Tejada
Gene Wilder = Jerome Silberman
Tammy Wynette = Wynette Pugh

What kind of person so easily gives up their real name?  How do their other family members feel about it?  I have a feeling in some close-knit families this could become a major problem and create a lot of hard feelings.  I know if I had a son or daughter talented enough to be given that choice, they’d keep their name and be damn proud of it.  Just ask the Wahlberg brothers or the Baldwin family.  Proud of who they are and not ashamed to admit it.