Archive for the ‘cemeteries’ Tag

09/24/2022 “Epithets”   Leave a comment

As I’ve stated many times in the past, I’ve always had a fascination with graveyards and cemeteries. With that thought in mind, here are a few of my favorite humorous epithets. It’s good to have a sense of humor even after death.

From Enosburg, Vermont

Here lies the body of our Anna

Done to death by a banana.

It wasn’t the fruit that laid her low

But the skin of the thing that made her go.

☠️☠️☠️

From Bayfield, Mississippi

Stranger pause. my tale attend,

And learn the cause of Hannah’s end.

Across the world the wind did blow,

She ketched a cold that laid her low.

We shed a lot of tears ’tis true,

But life is short – aged 82.

☠️☠️☠️

From Medway, Massachusetts

Beneath this stone, this lump of clay,

Lies Uncle Peter Daniels,

Who too early in the month of May

Took off his winter flannels.

☠️☠️☠️

From Canterbury, Kent, England

Of children in all she bore twenty-four:

Thank the Lord there will be no more.

☠️☠️☠️

From Chelmsford, Essex, England

Herer lies the man Richard,

And Mary his wife.

Their surname was Pritchard,

They lived without strife.

And the reason was plain,

They abounded in riches,

They had no care or pain,

And his wife wore the breeches.

HAVE YOU WRITTEN YOURS YET?

08/26/2002 ☠️☠️Morbid Humor☠️☠️   Leave a comment

Over the years I spent a great deal of time roaming through graveyards in New England and elsewhere. I’ve always found them to be very quiet and calming. I also discovered that the older the tombstones the more interesting are the epithets. Here are a few you might get a kick out of.

Beneath this stone, a lump of clay,

Lies Uncle Peter Daniels,

Who too early in the month of May

Took off his winter flannels.

😵😵😵

The children of Israel wanted bread,

And the Lord sent to them manna.

Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife,

And the Devil sent him Anna.

😵😵😵

Here lies my husbands, One, Two, Three,

Dumb as men could ever be.

As for my fourth, well, praise be God,

He bides for a little longer above the sod.

Alex, Ben, and Sandy were the first three names,

And to make things tidy I’ll add his – James.

😵😵😵

Here lies the body of fat May Preston

Who’s now moved to heaven

To relieve the congestion.

T.G.I.F.F.

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