Archive for the ‘ego’ Tag
I’ve been called a sarcastic SOB so many times I can’t count. That was by friends and acquaintances who I got along with. Comments by others were often even worse. I love and live for sarcasm because it’s a subtle way to criticize or make fun of someone without conflict. The reason there’s no conflict is that most people haven’t a clue when someone is being sarcastic. They pretend to be amused but aren’t even sure why. Any time I find any information on sarcasm, and it’s uses, I buy it. Here are a few collected definitions of sarcasm you might enjoy and if they don’t make sense to you, find a sarcastic friend to explain them.
- A CONSERVATIVE is someone who hates liberals because they have, at least once, seen themselves naked.
- FAT is what you don’t realize you are getting until you have to suck in your gut even when you are lying down.
- The CREDIT CARD is a small wallet sized device that finally made misery, ruin, and despair accessible to just about anyone.
- A CUSTOMER is a person who once came first and was always right, and is now routinely ignored, disrespected, and even scoffed at by the clueless, text messaging employees of most modern-day retail establishments. This has resulted in increased Internet commerce, wherein if the customer encounters a problem, he can simply call a toll-free number to get ignored, disrespected, and even scoffed at.
- A DOUGHNUT is a food created in response to the notion that if something has 20 grams of sugar, 25 grams of fat, and 425 calories, then it should be made available in groups of 12.
- E-COMMERCE is a convenient way to make your bank account accessible to criminals without having to leave the comfort and safety of your own home.
- EGO is the part of one’s mind that contains awareness in the sense of one’s own individuality. Highly developed in actors, models, sports figures, doctors, real estate tycoons, and God help us, our children.
- EDGY describes an otherwise normal person or work of art deemed provocative or daring by virtue of a little profanity, self-mutilation, or both.
- FAITH is a deeply personal, spiritual set of beliefs that provides for the option of engaging in endless, bloody civil war with anyone who has a different set of deeply personal, spiritual beliefs than you.
- FASHION is something that a total of six people actually have time to follow. Which might explain why we keep seeing clips of runway models wearing some of the weirdest crap in the world, none of which ever makes it to your local Target.
This is just a short sampling of many hundreds of definitions that I’ve acquired. You’ll be seeing more of them in the future for sure.
ENJOY YOUR WEEKEND
Have you ever had an identity crisis? Do you really understand what the term means? I thought I did but as often happens I really had only a general idea and never looked at the dirty little details.
As a young child we have an identity but it’s really just a temporary one until we’ve reached an age where real decisions about our future can be made without the undue influences of family. My father wanted me to be a jock at first. He was an outstanding athlete in school and always hoped I could excel as he did. I didn’t. I liked playing baseball but for me most of the other sports were a distraction from my real passion for fine art and commercial art. My first major identity issue occurred when I realized I didn’t want to be what he wanted me to be. I was just a kid who was afraid to speak out so instead I acted out. It was my way of saying, I don’t want to be a jock, I really don’t like playing football and basketball, I can do it if I want to but I don’t want to. It took him years to get over my actions but it had to happen eventually as it does with everyone and their parents.
We go through many of these identity issues during and after high school. Do I want to go to college? Do I want to be a part of a religious organization? Do I want to be married? What kind of job do I want? Do I want to have kids? It’s no wonder we have so many issues with family and friends as they try to push us in one direction or another. The real problem comes after you’ve made these life decisions for yourself and then find out you’ve made a terrible mistake. To me that’s a real ‘identity crisis’ and the others are just normal growing up things we all must deal with.
I’m writing about this topic in a semi-serious manner and don’t want to get bogged down and depressed by it. I’ve grown up and survived all of the decisions I’ve made. Some were good, some not so good, but that’s life in a nut shell. I’ve had my mid-life crisis, been divorced, been happy, been miserable, and survived them all just as you all will.
I took early retirement a few years ago and now I’m again faced with a new question. Who am I now? I sat down to think over a few things and suddenly realized that a person’s name and nicknames help them to find and maintain their identity. If Sean Combs can reinvent himself at a whim from P-Diddy to Puff Daddy then why can’t I do the same.
As always the web has the answers. I found these two web sites which are really helping me and my better-half to re-identifying ourselves. Check them out if you want a cool nickname or two.
http://www.myrapname.com/
http://www.getnicknames.com/nicknames.php
Here are a few of the selections we must choose from:
Our Bad Ass Biker Names: CARLEY CRANK – BEARDSLEY BONES
Our Pop Star Names: JULIA STEFANI – GORDAN ANGEL
Our Vampire Names: SELENE CALLISTO – DAMON NIX
Our Goth Names: ADARE – DE DEMI
Our Mobster Names: Lucia – ROCCO
Our Pirate Names: BOOTLEG BETTY – CAPTAIN SCURY
It’s obvious we have some serious decisions to make. Who do we want to be now? I’m leaning towards my vampire identity since that seems to be the current trend but my better-half is looking hard at the pop star identity. This could take forever.
everyuselessthing.com 