Archive for the ‘guiness’ Tag

04/17/2025 ☘️BELATED ST. PADDY’S DAY🍀   Leave a comment

In my younger days I was a huge St. Patrick’s Day celebrator. The fun of green beer, green hair, and ultra-green hangovers slowed down considerably as I reached my 50’s. It was some of the most fun I ever had, and I sometimes still miss that kind of craziness in my life. I failed to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day this year due to distractions, but I hope to make up for that mistake today with this posting. I’m holding in my hot little hands a supply of Irish humor that I will be thrilled to share with everyone. It’s naughty but nice.

  • “Mr. Mullarkey,” said the chemist, “did that mudpack I asked you to try improve your wife’s appearance?” “It did surely, but it keeps falling off.”
  • The Irish missionary was preaching to the African tribe. “And I say to you that you must love your fellow men!” “Moolagumbi!” shrieked the natives. “White man and black man must learn to cooperate.” “Moolagumbi” chanted the crowd. The missionary was very pleased, and he told the chief how pleased he was with the reception. “I am glad, O Man of Ireland,” said the chief, “but be careful as we pass the cattle pen that you don’t step in the moolagumbi.”

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An advertisement that appeared in a Wicklow newspaper:

“Young farmer would like to hear from young woman with tractor

with a view to matrimony. Please send picture of the tractor.”

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A favorite Irish limerick:

A handsome young boyo named Pat,

With girls would enjoy this and that.

He meant to cuddle and kiss,

When he spoke about “this,”

Just guess what he meant by his “that.”

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“That will be five pounds or a month in jail,” the judge said sharply.

“Very well, sir,” said Flaherty, “I’ll take the five pounds.”

A ROUND OF GUINESS FOR EVERYONE

08-08-2015 Journal – A Friday Seaside Lunch!   Leave a comment

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Yesterday was an odd day. After my forty-five minute workout I completed what few chores I had scheduled, changed clothes, and was off to do some shopping.  At 11:30 I received a message from my better-half who’d just left work and was headed home. I no sooner stepped from my car than it was decided we’d be spending the next few hours exploring along the seacoast and looking for a restaurant. We were hoping for a place we’d never before visited. Our travels brought us to Cape Porpoise, Maine located in a small harbor near the Whale Island lighthouse. We’ve been in this area many times before but never had occasion to visit any of the three small restaurants located there.

I saw a sign, "The Ramp", with a walkway extending behind a larger restaurant down towards the water. It was a tiny Bar & Grill tucked behind and under the other restaurant.

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It had a sports theme and the walls and ceilings were covered with memorabilia from just about everywhere. Football helmets, autographed pictures, political signs, basketball hoops, and a helleva lot more.  It was one of the coolest bars I’ve ever visited and I’ve been in a few.

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We had a couple of drinks while we waited for our food and the place was packed with people. Fortunately for us we’d been seated just before the big Friday afternoon crowd arrived. The wait for a seat was close to forty minutes but nobody seemed to mind. You could lounge with a drink along the water waiting for your table.

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I ordered a plate of Portuguese mussels that were without a doubt the best I’ve ever had. They were swimming in a broth of red chili’s, hot sausage, and herbs. My better-half had the crab cakes which she raved about for the rest of the day.

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The beer was cold, the food delicious, and the help was better than expected considering how busy it was.  We found ourselves making plans to return to this little bistro before we’d finished our first beers.

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‘The Whale Island lighthouse.’

This little place was one of the nicest surprises we’ve had in some time. We’ll be returning very soon to try a few more local brews and delicious food.  The meal was beautifully presented, delicious, and nicely priced. Our check not including the tip was $62.00 and believe me when I say it was money well spent.

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‘You can’t get seafood much fresher than this. Right off the boat.’

 

If you’re ever in the vicinity you should stop by for a nosh. This is one of those hidden little treasures that’s mainly frequented by the locals who know a good thing when they have it.

12-06-2013 More Beer Trivia   2 comments

My better-half has an addiction. It’s one of those addictions that isn’t one that is so terrible that rehab becomes an issue.  Her addiction is more like being madly in love rather than addicted.   I kid her about it a lot but it’s always in good, clean fun. I dedicate this posting to her and the huge garbage bag of bottle caps she’s been saving for the last thirty years. At this rate we may have enough to build her a small drinking establishment made completely of bottle caps.  If we do build something like that I think it should look something like this so all of her male friends, family, and co-workers can be totally comfortable.

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Now let’s get started with a list of some of her most favorite topics which are always beer related.

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The ’33’ on a bottle of Rolling Rock was originally a printer’s error. It refers to the 33 words in the original slogan. It has generated enough mystery over the years that the company left it in the label.

Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. “Wet your whistle” is the phrase inspired by this practice.

In the Czech Republic, beer is cheaper than Coke. A half liter at the local pub costs just 30 cents (10.50 CZK) while a half liter of Coke costs 85 cents (30 CZK). Beer is a little more expensive than club soda (which costs 29 cents, or 10 CZK, for a half liter).

A labeorphilist is a collector of beer bottles.

A tegestologist is a collector of beer mats.

A flood of beer swept through the streets of St. Giles, England, on 17 October 1814. Caused by a rupture in a brewery tank containing 3500 barrels of beer, the tidal wave killed nine people and demolished two houses.

The first six-pack of beer was produced by the Pabst Brewery in the 1940s. The brewery conducted numerous studies, which found six cans were the ideal weight for the average housewife to carry home from the store.

In eleventh-century England, a bride would distribute ale to her wedding guests in exchange for donations to the newlyweds. This brew, known as Bride Ale, is the origin of the word ‘bridal’.

One method of checking a beer’s quality is the way in which the foam adheres to the side of the glass after each sip. Beer connoisseurs call this “Brussels lace.”

In 1888 citizens of Munich took to the streets and rioted after a beer price increase was announced.

Czechs drink the most beer in the world per capita – an average of 160 liters a year per person.

In merry old England, town inns paid a government tax known as a ‘scot’ for serving beer. Beer lovers who left town to drink at rural pubs were said to be drinking ‘scot free’.

Beer recipes have been found on Babylonian clay tablets from over 6000 years ago.

Guinness sells an average of 7 million glasses a day.

The British Army supplied its men with a cash allowance for beer, considered a vital nutritional staple on long overseas missions. With this allowance of one penny, soldiers enjoyed six pints of ale every day.

In Egypt, two containers of beer were the minimum wage for a day’s labour.
Beer was often served for breakfast in medieval England.

It was customary in the 13th century to baptize children with beer.

A barrel contains 31 gallons of beer. What Americans commonly refer to as a keg is actually 15.5 gallons, or a half-barrel.

The Budweiser Clydesdales weight up to 2,300 pounds and stand nearly 6 feet at the shoulder.

12 oz. of a typical American pale lager actually has fewer calories than 2 percent milk or apple juice.

The world’s strongest beer is ‘Samuel Adams’ Triple Bock, which has reached 17% alcohol by volume. To obtain this level, however, they had to use champagne yeast.

The oldest known written recipe is for beer.

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This posting should kick off her holiday celebration  this year.  I’ll be helping her stock up on her beer inventory because the worst thing that can happen is for her to run out too early.  We’ll have to search diligently for a proper beer that’s special enough to be left out for Santa.  To hell with that milk and cookies nonsense.  In this house it’s beer and pretzels.

Little does she know that I was awake last Christmas eve when she slid quietly out of bed and drank all of Santa’s beer.  My parents couldn’t fool me with the milk and cookies scam and she needs to know she can’t either.  On top of everything else I hate waking up Christmas morning with a bed full of salt and pretzel chunks.  They can hurt!