Archive for the ‘memorial day’ Tag
Since my recent post of off-color limericks was so popular I thought I’d offer up a few more cute but nonetheless dirty jokes. I guess I should have figured out by now that I’ve got to “give the people what they want.” A few dirty jokes to help you continue the celebration of this important holiday.
Q. How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood?
A. When his hand caught on fire.
A woman answers the door to a market researcher. “Good morning, madam, I’m doing some research for Vaseline. Do you use it at all in your household?” “Oh yes, all the time. It’s very good for cuts, scrapes, and burns.” “Do you use it for anything else?” “Like what”, she asked. “Ahem. . well, during. . ahem. . sex.” “Oh, of course. Yes, I smear it on the bedroom doorknob to keep my husband out.
Men are like parking spots: The good ones are taken, and the rest are too small.
A woman is in bed with her lover, who also happens to be her husband’s best friend. They have sex for hours, and afterward while they’re just lying there, the phone rings. Since it is the woman’s house, she picks up the receiver. Her lover looks over at her and listens, only hearing her side of the conversation (she is speaking in a cheery voice). “Hello? Oh, hi, I’m so glad you called. Really? Thanks. Okay. Bye.” She hangs up the telephone and her lover asks, “Who was that?” Oh,” she replies, “that was my husband telling me all about the wonderful time he’s having on his fishing trip with you.”
Q. What’s better than a rose on your piano?
A. Tulips on your organ.
EVERYDAY CELEBRATE OUR VETS,
BOTH LIVING AND DEAD
For me this is a day to honor the fallen and to remember those who’ve chosen to serve.
NOTHING MORE NEEDS TO BE SAID
I found myself awake much too early this morning for some unknown reason. I usually like to get moving around 7am but this morning I was awake at 4:45am and wondering why. Yesterday was a nothing-special day and I had no pressing personal issues preying on my mind . . . so why? I’ll probably never know but it sure is irritating.
Yesterday was a rainy and overcast day which kept me indoors most of the day. I decided to get back to my home brewing tasks and to bottle my batch of Sake that’s been needing my attention for more than a week.
I checked the bottles to be sure that fermentation had truly stopped. Once many years ago I bottled a batch of wine a little too early and was awakened in the middle of the night by exploding bottles. I can’t have that happen again . . . what a mess! Wine making isn’t as complicated as most people think but it does require a reasonable amount of common sense. The minute you forget that fact you’re in trouble. I began the siphoning process which takes no time at all and everything went smoothly.
I decided against using the standard wine corks with this batch. These screw caps work just as well and require much less work for me. It also makes reusing the bottles much easier and I won’t need to exhaust my limited supply of good wine corks.
I was pleased with the overall look and clarity of the Sake and was able to fill twelve half bottles and seven additional full size bottles. More than enough to last me for quite some time.
I was also able to save and store a pint and one half of the Sake yeast which will allow me to make numerous batches in the future and save me money at the same time. It’s all about the yeast!
After the bottling was completed the better-half cooked up a delicious chicken and veggie stir-fry dinner. I cracked open our first bottle of the Sake, warmed it properly, and we toasted the great meal and the Memorial Day holiday.
HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY
THANK A VET FOR THEIR SERVICE
SHOW THE FLAG
(And maybe drink some Sake too.)
‘Remember’
With the Memorial Day weekend looming we can all sit back and watch the television programming meant to honor those service men and women who have paid the ultimate price. Being an Army veteran I hesitate to participate in the required litany of praise, sorrow, and remembrances that seem to be mandatory these days. As a vet I never expected praise for my service because it was the right thing to do, for me. I wanted to pay back a little to the country that kept me free. It’s more comfortable for me to celebrate the holiday in a private manner without all of the hoopla.
I had a number of friends who proudly served their country but never made it home and I remember them all too often. I have no need for making some sort of holy pilgrimage to "The Wall" in DC to stand and sob and leave tokens. I’ll fly my flag with pride in silence, remember my lost friends in silence, and try to live my life in a way to make them proud.
So there’ll be no sad stories here because I prefer to celebrate this day my way. It takes special people to voluntarily place themselves in harms way with the fear of dying a real possibility, especially these days. Nothing saddens me as much as the people in this country that have never served and criticize those who do. Waving a flag and watching fire-works displays twice a year leaves me flat.
I’m looking forward as most people do to the Summer months but using Memorial Day as a spring board for that seems a little disrespectful, to me. Make a contribution to the Wounded Warrior Project, quietly remember the fallen, kiss your children, and live your life to the fullest. That’s the best way to remember them because they died so you could.
Let’s make flying the American flag the only dignified display required for celebrating this day.
IS YOUR FLAG FLYING?
It appears that the weather will finally permit me to get back into the garden. I’ve been monitoring the long-range weather forecast for a week and it looks as if the chances of a hard frost are behind us. Most of the night time temperatures for the next two weeks are in the high forties and low to mid-fifties. Today is the day that the majority of the garden will be planted.
I’ve had a lot of plants in my cold frames for more than a week letting them get accustomed to the weather and cooler temperatures. I collected my three dozen hard boiled eggs, a bag of fertilizer, and headed to the garden.
Dig a five inch deep hole, drop in an egg, crush the top, drop in a little fertilizer, and set the plant in place. Do it about ten more times and you have a nice patch of jalapenos peppers to harvest later in the Summer.
Next came the cherry tomato plants. I decided to double the number of plants from last year because we eat so much salad during the Summer months. We came up a little short last year and I don’t want that happening again. What good is a salad without tomatoes.
I planted the zucchini, yellow squash, and kohlrabi’s next but ran out of eggs. I plan on picking up more eggs tonight and tomorrow I can plant all of the remaining cucumber plants. Twenty minutes of sprinkling completes the planting for today. Hopefully we’ll get some rain in the next few days or I’ll be running the sprinklers again.
I was a little surprised to find that I had two areas in the frames where I could add some miscellaneous plants. The better-half and I will decide what else we need and have them planted over the weekend. My goal was to have everything planted before the end of the Memorial Day weekend and we’re right on schedule for a change.
Well the Texas trip is finally here and I’ll be flying off to Dallas tomorrow. I don’t intend to do any blogging until sometime next week, probably Wednesday at the latest. I’ll be taking a break from working out, blogging and everything else as well. That’s what a vacation is supposed to be and I’m going to make the most of it.
This week I finally planted the last few plants in the garden. I have others breaking ground as we speak and so far everything is doing fine except for the asparagus. All of those I gently planted are doing absolutely nothing. I purchased a bag of asparagus roots and knew at the time it was a big gamble. I have yet to buy either flower bulbs or veggie roots packaged that way that have actually grown. I’ve finally learned my lesson, never again. Next year I’ll try to find asparagus seeds and start my own plants. Hopefully I’ll have more success.
“Zucchini”
As you can see the garden has made significant progress in the last week. The plants are loving the warmer nights and are jumping out of the ground. As you can see I have more chives than I know what to do. When I return I can look forward to a day spent filling the dehydrator with chives for our use through next Winter.
“Cherry Tomato’s”
Starting tomorrow I can kick back and relax for a few days and enjoy my trip. It will be nice to enjoy the warm and sometimes hot weather in Dallas. It should help me shake off the effects of this last Maine Winter. My summer will officially start when I return home next week fully rested and relaxed.
“Left Side”
“Right Side”
I hope you all enjoy your Memorial Day weekend and that the weather cooperates. Show the flag, cook a few burgers and dogs, and toast all of our former and current Vets. Without their service we wouldn’t have much to celebrate.
With the Memorial Day weekend approaching it seems that every blogger is obligated to acknowledge our military in some fashion with patriot slogans and photographs. I’ve done that myself in the past but always felt a little odd doing it. Being a former enlistee in the Army automatically makes me a fanatical supporter of our servicemen and servicewomen. When I was actively serving I never really wished for a lot of hoopla about it, just a plain old "thank you for your service" would have sufficed. Of course being of the Vietnam generation we received very little in the way of attention that wasn’t biased by the ever present anti-war movement and media. Years later in a politically correct move the country finally decided we should be acknowledged by building us a freaking wall.
The following list is an approximation of the countries where our troops are assigned and the number of troops in each country as of 2010. This is an official Thank You from me to each of them. I thank them not only for their service but their sacrifices as well. It’s not an easy thing to leave your family and friends and be shipped off to God knows where to possibly fight and die. I pray they all stay safe and return home as soon as possible.
United States – 1,123,219
Afghanistan – 68,000
Alaska – 21,280
Australia – 183
Bahrain – 2,902
Belgium – 1,165
Canada – 146
Qatar – 800
Diego Garcia – 516
Djibouti – 139
Egypt – 292
Germany – 45,596
Guam – 5,646
Guantanamo Bay, Cuba – 988
Greece – 361
Greenland – 138
Hawaii – 49,242
Honduras – 388
Italy – 10,916
Japan – 52,692
Jordan – 200
Kuwait – 15,000
Netherlands – 374
Norway – 90
Philippines – 131
Portugal – 713
Puerto Rico – 162
Saudi Arabia – 278
Singapore – 180
South Korea – 28,500
Spain – 1,600
Thailand – 114
Turkey – 1,491
United Arab Emirates – 193
United Kingdom – 9,310
This posting also remembers those soldiers who’ve paid the ultimate price in protecting this country as stated so eloquently by Thomas Jefferson:
“The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants”. — Thomas Jefferson
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