Archive for the ‘snowmobiling’ Tag

02-01-2015 Journal–Miscellaneous Winter Crap!   Leave a comment



I’m almost fully recovered from he damn flu . . . . finally.  My ability to taste food has returned and my temperature has fallen back into the normal range. I’m feeling good and looking forward to the continuing insanity that will be the remainder of my winter.

I always plan for slow times in January and February but this year isn’t cooperating.  I started out with the flu in January, next a colonoscopy, then a car inspection, an annual doctors visit, a dentist appointment, and finally an eye exam.  After all of those pain-in-the-ass chores it will be the end of March and winter will be almost over.  Along with that list is the ongoing bathroom remodel which has been in limbo because of the flu.


The weather remains snowy and snowy and even more snowy.  We already have more than three feet of snow and are expecting another foot or two within the week.  If you are a skiing, skating, snowmobiling or snowboarding snow bunny then Maine is where you need to be. 


My house has two feet of snow on the roof and ice hanging everywhere else. There must be ten ton of ice and snow that at some point will come crashing down behind the house. God help any living thing that happens to be roaming around when that happens.  There could be deaths reported.


I hope these steps survive the ice drop in one piece this year. In years past I’ve been required to replace rails and steps after they’ve been crushed by the falling ice.


I love waking up to the winter view from the window in my bedroom but this is what I saw yesterday as I opened the curtains.  More freaking ice.  I suppose it could be worse and I’m almost positive it will be.  My better-half and I are heading out into the snow and ice with cameras in hand to see what we can see.  I’ll post any interesting pictures as soon as I can. 

It’ time to gear up and get moving.

10-16-2013   Leave a comment

The Winter season is upon us in everyway except for the snow which will arrive when it’s most inconvenient as always.  Everyone has been slowly abandoning their summer-wear and easing into that ever so attractive triple layered ensemble of t-shirts, sweaters, sweat shirts, gloves, hats, and parkas.  People watching takes an ugly turn every year at this time and I’ll sure miss the bikinis, thongs, short skirts, and beautiful tans.  It’s the worst part of winter for me.

It gets so bad at times that after a few months, usually in February, you might find yourself making a early trip to the local mall to have a coffee and watch the ever increasing numbers of people doing their morning walk. There’s nothing more sad than making an early morning visit to a semi-deserted mall just to watch other idiots trying to make some human contact and to get the hell out of the house for an hour or so.

I’m a little jealous of those folks who can’t wait for the snow to arrive so they have a place to play.  I’m way too clumsy to be a snow bunny.  As a kid I managed to injure myself on a regular basis during every Winter season without even trying too hard.  Skiing was always good for a twisted knee or an up close and personal relationship with the occasional tree or shrub.  Once or twice I was actually able to ski down a hill, knocking over other skiers along the way, and then ending up in a creek with thin ice and really cold water.  We skated on a remote pond for years and without fail I always managed to fall through the ice on a few occasions.

After decades of minor injuries from walking on snow and ice I gave up.  No skiing, no skating, and definitely no snowmobiling.  When my friends in Maine discovered my failures as a snow bunny they began to give me odd looks and began whispering behind my back.  This was the motivation I needed to get serious about resolving my winter issues.  After many years I’ve discovered the only winter activity I’m good at.

As you are certainly aware every ski lodge has things in common with the others.  There’s always a chair lift, snow, a big mountain, and a lodge.  My winter activities this year will be centered primarily around the lodge and it’s varied selection of things to do.  There are lovely rooms to sleep and play in.  There are hot tubs, Jacuzzis, and untold numbers of young and attractive individuals to meet and interact with.  My favorite thing in every lodge is that comfortable bar stool that sits at the end of the bar near the huge picture window. There I can sit, drink, eat, meet, and greet everyone.  The only possible injuries I might suffer would be from an accidental fall from the bar stool which would only involve a spilled drink and possibly a small bruise on my buttocks.  The other and more dangerous injury would be from one of the many skiers I see flying down the mountain just outside my window.  If by chance one of them loses control and crashes through the window, I could be seriously injured.  If I stay alert I should be fine but you never know.  It also requires that I surround myself with a bevy of alcohol drinking buxom women to help break my fall if the worst happens. As always my approach to everything Winter is SAFETY FIRST.

Hopefully this winter I’ll remain uninjured for another year. Along the way I intend to stay as warm and cozy as possible with all of my new female lodge buddies. I promise to do my part when it comes time to do a Jell-O shot or two off the stomach of an enthusiastic  female volunteer.


09-22-2013   Leave a comment

Our best friend has finally arrived to spend the winter with us. It’s about this time every year that this friend arrives and is welcomed with open arms by us both.  This friend is warm and loving like no one else and my better-half and I are looking forward to sharing our bed  for the next few months with this visiting friend.

Now that you’ve all read that last paragraph and had a few of those off-color thoughts I know you were having let me explain further.  Our best friend is a soft, fuzzy, green, and electrified blanket.  With Fall in the air and Winter on the way this friend makes living bearable while the seasons change. To keep our house heated is the biggest expense of the year other than the mortgage.  Every degree we can lower the level of heat in the house is money in our pocket. We haven’t even turned on the heat yet and I suspect we won’t until sometime in mid October.  By delaying that long we’ll save approximately $350.00.  We’re willing to wear more clothing for a few weeks during the day and to turn up the electric blanket a bit at night each night to accomplish that.

I’ve never had the luxury of living in an area of the country that has mild temperatures for most of the year.  While I really love the season change and the cold and snow I occasionally envy people living in those areas.  Living here is like having to lead two lives.  Hot weather, time on the beach, and tourists over running the area.  Shorts, T-shirts, flip flops, and sun tan and sun burn.  Within a few weeks that all disappears and out come the parka’s, gloves, wool socks, and skyrocketing heating costs.  We’re used to it but I feel bad for any of those southerners who may relocate here. It would be a huge shock to their systems and their wallets.

We can hope for a few more weeks of Indian Summer but that doesn’t always occur as planned.  By this time next month all of us Mainer’s will have made the mental transition from Summer to Winter and will be prepared to move on down the road as usual.  The next six months will be all about, snow, sleet, wind, crushed mail boxes, car accidents, and a general malaise caused by being house bound.  For some of the more hardy folks it will be all about plowing snow, ice fishing, hunting, and snowmobiling.  The kids as always will be throwing snowballs, building forts, snowmen, and praying for a heavy snow fall that will cancel school.  Some things just never change.

After six months of Winter we’ll make the transition back to Spring and Summer with a real appreciation that most southern folks don’t have.  The memory of every minute that I spend sitting in the sun on my deck and every time I walked the beach in my swim suit this summer will carry me through the winter.  It’s all a big mind game that I play with myself.  When I’m out in the driveway using the snow blower and dressed liked a freaking Eskimo I’m actually thinking about that warm beach and those pretty young things in their skimpy bikinis. 

Don’t tell my better-half my little secret or there’ll be hell to pay for sure.

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