The Bad Elf
There was an elf too tired to work,
He called Santa a big fat jerk.
He grabbed up some toys,
Making almost no noise
And fled to Club Med with a clerk.
Archive for the ‘Limericks’ Category
🌲Christmas Limerick🌲 Leave a comment
🌲Christmas Limerick🌲 Leave a comment
Old Santa got drunk on warm ale
“I’m too old for Christmas” his wail
“But what of the toys
For the good girls and boys?”
“I’ll have Amazon send them by mail!”
11/28/2021 🌲Christmas Limerick🌲 Leave a comment
I thought I would kick off the Christmas season with a proper limerick: 26 Shopping days to go . . .
There was an old elf named Bing
He was good at only one thing
He was clumsy with tools
And broke all the rules
But boy could that son-of-a-bitch sing.
🍗Thanksgiving Limerick🍗 2 comments
🍗Thanksgiving Limerick🍗 Leave a comment
11/22/2021 🍗Thanksgiving Limerick🍗 Leave a comment
11/21/2021 ***1st X-Mas Limerick Alert*** Leave a comment
The drinks left for him by each bed,
Had gone straight to old Santa’s head;
He was found off the road,
With an upside-down load,
And himself slumped, dead drunk, in his sled!
***Limerick💗Alert*** 1 comment
There was a young lady named Jo
Who was serviced four times in a row;
When she cried: “Give me more!”
A weak voice from the floor
Protested: “I just can’t, it’s too sore.”
11/12/2021 ***Limerick Alert*** 2 comments
“Far more precious to me than my treasure.”
JB loudly announced, “Is my leisure;
I am happy to screw
The retirement home’s crew –
“They are slow, but that lengthens the pleasure!”
11/10/2021 ***Limerick Alert*** Leave a comment
In the street, a big lady from Fareham,
Would take out her tits to compare’em;
She explained: As I’m blessed
With great mounds on my chest,
it’s a bit of a shame not to share’em.
everyuselessthing.com 