Everyone at one time or another has a bad day or a bad week or a bad year. When your in one of these ruts it’s sometimes difficult to pull yourself out of it. Todays post is meant to inspire the readers and to lift their spirits a little. I hope it works for you!
“Never bend your head. Always hold it high. Look the world straight in the eye.” Helen Keller
“Keep your eyes on the stars, keep your feet on the ground.” Theodore Roosevelt
“I never remember feeling tired by work, though idleness exhausts me completely. Arthur Conan Doyle
“The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you got a put up with the rain.” Dolly Parton
There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” Albert Einstein
“Don’t give in! Make your own trail.” Katharine Hepburn
“You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it.” Margaret Thatcher
“One of the things I learned the hard way was it does not pay to get discouraged. Keeping busy and making optimism a way of life can restore your faith in yourself.” Lucille Ball
Even if you’re on the right track you’ll get run over if you just sit there. Will Rogers
“When written in Chinese, the word “crisis” is composed of two characters. One represents danger and the other represents opportunity.” John F Kennedy “
And finally one of my favorites:
Rules for Living
“Do not worry, eat three square meals a day, say your prayers, be courteous to your creditors, keep your digestion’s good, and steer clear of biliousness, exercise, go slow and go easy. Maybe there are other things that your special case requires to make you happy, but, my friend, these, I reckon, will give you a good life.” Abraham Lincoln
This quiz may interest some of you trivia experts. This is truly a “Miscellaneous” selection from many and varied categories of trivia. As always, the answers will be posted below.
How large was the fund bequeathed in 1896 by Alfred Nobel to establish the annual Nobel Prizes?
What philosophy was expounded by the American League for Physical Culture, established in 1929?
What was the first word that the blind Helen Keller learned in sign language from her teacher, Annie Sullivan?
How much weight is saved by an airline if it doesn’t paint a Jumbo Jet?
What was used to erase lead pencil marks before the rubber eraser was invented?
What did Nippon Airways do to keep birds from being sucked into their plane’s engines?
Who was described in Playboy magazine as “Mary Poppins in Joan Collins’ clothing?
What did Lizzie Borden, Napolean, and Titian have in common?
How big is a cord of wood?
Where are the islands of Langerhans?
Answers
$9.2 million, Nudism, Water, 300 lbs., Pieces of Bread, They painted large eyes on engine intake manifolds, Vanna White, They were red heads, 4’X4’X8′ long, In the human body – Pancreas.
I love posting interesting information and when possible, I back up those facts with quotes from a variety of people with incredible life stories. I’ve noticed over the years that the great majority of published interesting quotes are primarily made by men. I also discovered quite by accident a small paperback book published in 2000 called Womens Wit and Wisdom. I haven’t been as surprised and pleased as I was as I began reading that book. I’ll share with you a number of quotes from well-known women which are both incredible and hilarious. This book contains quite a diverse group of quotes covering any number of topics from politics, humor, to life lessons. This little book will be placed in a position of honor in my unusual collection of writings.
“My friends have made the story of my life. In a thousand ways they have turned my limitations into beautiful privileges and enabled me to walk serene and happy in the shadow cast by my deprivation.” Helen Keller
“The loneliest woman in the world is a woman without a close woman friend.” Toni Morrison
“Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once your aboard there’s nothing you can do.” Golda Meir
“I was thirty-seven when I went to work writing the column. I was too old for a paper route, too young for Social Security, and too tired for an affair.” Erma Bombeck
👩🏻🦰👩🏻👱🏻♀️
“The naked truth is always better than the best-dressed lie.” Ann Landers
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Eleanor Roosevelt
“I’ve been on a diet for two weeks and all I’ve lost is two weeks.” Totie Fields
“My grandfather once told me that there were two kinds of people: those who do the work and those who take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was much less competition.” Indira Gandhi
“Please know that I am aware of the hazards. I want to do it because I want to do it. Women must try to do things as men have tried. When they fail, their failure must be but a challenge to others.” Amelia Earhart
Are you happy? Living in the 21st century can be confusing at times and utterly ridiculous almost always. I can’t even wrap my head around how people are raising children these days. It’s when my frustration gets to be too much, I revert to other times that were also screwy but not near as strange as right now. The following humor was based entirely on the 1980’s so bear that in mind as you read them. Everything is always about context. Hop on the time travel train for a few minutes and enjoy 1984. Orwell didn’t have a clue.
When should you stop fucking your girlfriend doggie style? When you catch her chasing cars.
What’s the difference between a peeping tom and a pickpocket? A pickpocket snatches watches.
What’s the difference between mono and herpes? You get mono from snatching a kiss.
What do you find at the bottom of girls’ undies? Clitty litter.
What’s the difference between a fox and a pig? About six beers.
What’s a box spring? An I. U. D.
Why did the stupid girl think there was something wrong with her birth control pills? They kept falling out.
Why was 6 mad at 7? Because 7-8-9
What’s Helen Keller’s favorite color? Corduroy
Who are the three most famous Chinese virgins? “Tu Yung Tu”, Tu Dum Tu”, and “No Yen Tu.
Why don’t chickens wear underwear? Because they would look fucking stupid.
What’s the difference between an epileptic corn husker and a hooker with diarrhea? An epileptic corn husker shucks between fits.
How old are you? It’s a valid question that most people ask about a stranger when discussing them with a third-party, “He’s about 20 years old.”. People who are in their 20’s think people in their 30’s are old while people in their 30’s think people in their 50’s are old. It’s all relative and silly but we do it all the time without really thinking about it. In my case I think anyone younger than 60 is just a stupid kid and that should show you how really stupid it is to judge a person by their age. Today’s post is going to list some interesting accomplishments by the age of the person doing them. Using age as way to judge someone is just ridiculous as these examples will show you.
At the Age of 1
Mary, of the House of Stewart, became Queen of Scotland.
Brooke Shields was selected as the Ivory Snow baby.
At the Age of 2
Judy Garland launches her stage career.
Isabella II ascends to the Spanish throne.
At the Age of 3
Albert Einstein speaks for the first time.
Alice Liddell first meets Charles Dodgson (pen name of Lewis Carol) who later used her as inspiration to write Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland.
At the Age of 4
Malcolm Little (who later changed his name to Malcolm X) watches as his family’s home was burned to the ground by members of the Ku Klux Klan.
Bob Hope emigrates from England to the United States
At the Age of 5
Devora Wilson, Mountain climber, scales a 4000-foot peak.
Christopher Robin Milne hears the first “Winnie the Pooh” story, with himself as the main character, made up by his father, A. A.
At the Age of 6
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart gives keyboard concerts across Europe.
Shirley Temple receives an honorary Oscar for her contribution to film.
Ron Howard stars as Opie in TV’s, The Andy Griffith Show.
At the Age of 7
Helen Keller, blind and deaf, master’s a vocabulary of 625 words.
Carol Brown, who travels more than an hour daily to attend a distantschool because as a black she is denied admission to the local all-white school, motivates her father to file a lawsuit, resulting in the landmark Brown V. Board of Education Supreme Court decision which finds public-schoolsegregation to be unconstitutional.
😉😉😉
My Credentials
Age 1 – Flung my full diaper at my mother.
Age 2 – Spoke my first word (Shit!)
Age 3 – Drew my first tree.
Age 4 – Threw up on my sister.
Age 5 – Drank my first drink of alcohol (bottle of perfume)
Age 6 – Ran away from school (police found me later)
I collect many books of odd and interesting information but a few weeks ago I found something in a box that surprised me. Stuck between two other stacks of papers was a small paperback book of only 63 pages. It is titled Womens Wit and Wisdom and was published in 2000. One chapter caught my eye concerning quotations from various women from various years with their thoughts on Life. Here are a few.
“Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you’re aboard there’s nothing you can do.” Golda Meir 1973
“The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.” Lucille Ball 1989
“I was thirty-seven when I went to work writing my column. I was too old for a paper route, too young for Social Security, and too tired for an affair.” Erma Bombeck 1979
“Nature gives you the face you have at twenty; it is up to you to merit the face you have at fifty.” Coco Chanel 1956
“It is better to be looked over than overlooked.” Mae West 1967
“Cynicism is an unpleasant way of saying the truth.” Lillian Hellman 1939
“At the end of your life you will never regret not having passed one more test, winning one more verdict or not closing one more deal. You will regret the time not spent with a husband, a child, a friend or parent.” Barbara Bush 1990
“Adolescence is just one big walking pimple.” Carol Burnett 1986
“Suddenly you find at the age of fifty, that a whole new life has opened before you, as if a fresh sap of ideas and thoughts was rising in you.” Agatha Christie 1977″
“My friends have made the story of my life. In a thousand ways they have turned my limitations into beautiful privileges and enabled me to walk serene and happy in a shadow cast by my deprivation.” Helen Keller 1903
I’m a lover of quotations as you all know. Some are poignant and other are a bit to smarmy and silly. They’re all good if you take them at face value. Just don’t read too much into them or your in trouble. I’ve collected many that are funny and those are my favorites regardless of who supplied them. These following sayings are from all sorts of people, some well known but most are not. Here they are . . .
The devils boots don’t creak. Scottish Proverb
Losing weight is a triumph of mind over platter. Anon
Nothing is more dangerous than a friend without discretion; even a prudent enemy is preferable. Jean de la Fontaine
It is easier to know how to do than it is to do. Chinese Proverb
When dealing with people remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudice, and motivated by pride and vanity. Dale Carnegie
Speak well of your enemies, sir, you made them. Oren Arnold
God is a father; luck, a stepfather. Yiddish Proverb
A graceful taunt is worth a thousand insults. Louis Nizer
My lawyer was hurt – the ambulance backed up suddenly. Anon
A leader is best when people barely know he exists. When his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will all say, “We did it ourselves.” Lao-tzu
With Christmas approaching I’ve been reflecting on things a little. I’ve observed over the last few decades that Fear appears to be winning the war against Courtesy. During this pandemic it’s gotten even worse because of the demands of social distancing. We as a people will need to readjust to our normal life at some point when this pandemic is no longer a critical issue. My only question: Can our society as it currently exists make the necessary adjustments to a “new normal” or just fall back into the same old self-destructive pre-pandemic rut?
It’s been a slow process that has us as a people becoming so paranoid of each other that courtesy and helpfulness between individuals can no longer be expected. I know if I saw someone in distress, I would react immediately but in the back of my mind I’d be thinking and worrying, “Is someone going to sue me or falsely accuse me of wrongdoing” just “to be on the safe side”. It’s a sad and dangerous commentary on what our society is becoming. People stand by and watch as others are raped, stabbed, and murdered, without taking any action as simple as a 911 call.
This kind of behavior is destructive to society, but I understand the reasons for it. If the country continues to permit individuals to rationalize any and all bad behavior up to and including murder, the situation will never improve. All of the psychobabble in the world cannot justify or excuse hard-core criminal behavior. Where there is a carrot there must be a stick. Lack of societal deterrents for crimes is to blame. If there is a crime, there must be swift punishment to send the proper message to the masses.
Soon, the pandemic will pass, and everyone will be scrambling to get back to the ‘old normal‘. I hope it doesn’t happen. The pandemic has shown us just how bad things can get under difficult circumstances, and yet we survived. It’s time for the younger generations to start voicing their beliefs and complaints, getting involved in government at every level, to help create a ‘new normal‘.
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