I thought I’d been fairly consistent in blogging quizzes from almost all of the decades. A few readers (mostly Millennials) claim that I’m biased towards the 90’s because I’m just an out-of-touch “Old Fart”. Well, this old fart will properly respond to those critics (young wise asses) with the first of many 90’s related quizzes. Let’s see just how smart they really are. Here are ten questions that will test these so-called critics and their vast (imagined) knowledge of damn near everything. As always the answers are listed below.
Who succeeded North Korean leader Kim Ill-sung after his death in 1994?
Who is the author of the dystopian novel The Giver?
Which late-night talk-show host was formerly a writer on the Simpsons?
Which push-up bra became famous in the 90s?
What ancient wind instrument featured in the title of the Legend of Zelda Game released in 1998?
What Formula One motor racing resulted in the tragic deaths of Ayrton Senna and Roland Ratzenberger
Name the 1999 film of the real-life story of Brandon Tenna, for which lead actress Hillary Swank was awarded the Best Actress Academy Award?
What’s spinning dolls were recalled after the manufacturer received more than 100 complaints of injuries?
What was the name of the Spice Girls third and final album?
What classic work of literature is Helen Fielding’s Bridget Jones Diary roughly based on?
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One of My Fav’s
For how many days were Carmen Electra and Dennis Rodman married?
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Answers
His son Kim Jong-Il, Lois Lowery, Conan O’Brien, The Wonder Bra, Ocarina, 1994 San Merino Grande Prix, Boys Don’t Cry, Sky Dancers, Forever, Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen, Nine (Lucky Dennis)
I am an old fart. It’s not an easy admission to make regardless of your age but when you get to a certain point you just have to face it. I see it in the eyes of people that I deal with on a regular basis, that look of sadness when they remember how I once was. None of us seniors are looking for pity, but that look is a little disrespectful. Aging is something we all have to deal with in our own way but never underestimate a person with white hair, a bit of a potbelly, and a curmudgeonly attitude. All of you younger folks will realize how tough the transition to old age is soon enough when your time comes. So, I’ll do my best to help you understand what you’re in for. Here is a little old-fart humor that may help you understand what I’m talking about.
An old woman was feeling suicidal following the death of her beloved husband. So, she decided to use his old gun to shoot yourself through the heart. Not wanting to miss the vital organ and become a vegetable and a burden, she asked her doctor precisely where the heart was located on a woman. “Just below your left breast,” he answered. Later that night she was admitted to the hospital with a gunshot wound to the knee.
A boy was walking down the street when he noticed his grandfather sitting on the porch, in a rocking chair, wearing nothing from the waist down. “Grandpa, what you doing sitting out here with nothing on below the waist? “The old man looked at him and said, “Well, last week I sat out here with no shirt on, and I got a stiff neck. This is your grandmother’s great idea.
An 80-year-old rancher was about to marry a young girl of 21. His trusted friend and advisor, the local banker, had serious doubts as to how long the old man would be able to satisfy such a young and agile bride and feared for his friend’s happiness and safety. So, for the sake of matrimonial harmony, he advised the old man to bring in a hired hand to help around the ranch, knowing full well that the hired hand could possibly help out in the bedroom, too, behind the old man’s back. The rancher thought it was a great idea and agreed. Four months later, the banker called his friend. “How’s the new wife working out?” he asked. “She’s pregnant,” replied the old man. The banker smiled knowingly. “And how is the hired hand?” The old man replied, “Oh, she’s pregnant too.
How do you know when you’re getting old? When you start having dry dreams and wet farts.
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