Archive for the ‘old age’ Tag

Spring is in the Air   Leave a comment

After the last eighteen months of my illness there are many things that I’ve really missed.  The Pandemic being the least of them. With all of the various surgeries, cancer, and chemotherapy dominating my every thought I’ve come to appreciate a long list of many little things that I took for granted for most of my life.  The adage “Stop and Smell the Roses” suddenly means something.  I’m glad I still have time left to really appreciate each and every one of them.

Spending an hour or two totally lost in a painting.

Spending time over the last few years watching two grandsons becoming thinking and intelligent little men. 

Realizing after all these years just how precious these days have come to mean to me while sitting on the deck with my better-half enjoying the first sunshine of Spring.

Relaxing and sipping a Jack and Coke that I’m  finally able to have now that my newly rebuilt liver permits it.

Being able to bitch and complain about anything that irks me and not giving a good damn about what people think.

Enjoying all of the freedoms that come with old age that you can’t really appreciate until you get here.

You can thank my better-half and three glasses of Jack and Coke for this posting.  Maybe it will give those of you approaching the AARP age of fifty that it’s not quite as bad as you might think.  When you’re given lemons make lemonade but make sure you have some Jack Daniels in it.

03-21-2015 Journal–Medi(I Don’t Really)care!   Leave a comment

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Well I guess the world can continue to rotate around the sun and all of you can continue living your exciting lives once again.  I received a clean bill of health from my doctor during my recent checkup so everyone can relax again for another year just knowing I’ll still be around.

Have I ever mentioned just how much I hate doctors and hospitals? I’m positive you have no idea just how much. I spent a lot of my youth visiting uncounted  hospitals throughout the Pittsburgh area while visiting my mother who was afflicted with every disease known to man during her life.  I became almost phobic about it.  I was terrified of entering hospitals and getting stuck with needles. For years every time I needed a blood test or a shot it usually caused me to become violently ill or to pass out completely.  That phobia was finally dealt with when it became time for me to leave the Army.  A blood test was required before I could be released from the service and I certainly wasn’t going to stick around any longer than necessary.  I sat quietly while they took six tubes of blood and suffered no ill effects whatsoever.  It’s amazing what proper motivation can do to help you get through the tough times.

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I have no phobias now but I still hate hospitals and doctors.  I’m good to go until sometime in August when my new doctor will put me through my paces once again.  Blood tests, poking and prodding of body parts best left alone, and more of those miracle vaccines and shots that may or may not even work. Getting old requires more and more maintenance of the body and mind just to maintain the status quo. Regardless we eventually all lose that battle.  More exercise, less alcohol, no smoking, healthy foods, and an endless supply of drugs, drugs, drugs. 

When I turned fifty the medical community found out about me and the process began in earnest. I needed a shingles shot, a pneumonia shot, a tetanus booster which probably cost the insurance carriers at least $500.00. Increased visits, regular colonoscopies, and future eye surgery to fix those pesky cataract problems we all have to deal with at some point. 

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I’m one of millions of Boomers whose current responsibility is to stay alive as long as possible to help keep the health care community in business.  What will happen to the system once we’ve all passed on.  That will be the new healthcare crisis with lots of layoffs, hospital closures, and a serious overpopulation of doctors, nurses, and home care specialists.  I guess we Baby Boomers could be called a massive health care asset until we all finally die.

05-04-2013   Leave a comment

I’ve mentioned in the past that my better-half works for Lowes Home Improvement.  She’s worked there for a number of years and is what I would consider an honest and loyal employee.  That being said she then becomes a huge target for my sarcastic wit.  I worked in big box retail for a lot of years myself so I know exactly which of her buttons to push to make her a little crazy. I’m dedicating this posting to her and all of the other loyal slaves at Lowes.

I’ll be supplying her with a number of copies of this that she can distribute amongst her cashiers and service desk employees. After all knowing your customers is the best way to develop those in-demand customer service skills. Read and learn girls!

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You’re in the middle of a few spring projects: putting in a new fence, yard cleanup, putting in a new garden. You’re hot and sweaty, covered in dirt, lawn clippings, and paint. You have your old work clothes on. You know the outfit — shorts with the hole in the crotch, old T-shirt with numerous unknown stains on it, and an old pair of tennis shoes.

Right in the middle of these projects you realize you need to run to Lowes for supplies.  Depending on your age you might do the following:

In your 20s: Stop what you’re doing. Shave, take a shower, blow dry your hair, brush your teeth, floss and put on clean clothes. Check yourself in the mirror and flex. Add a dab of your favorite cologne because, you never know, you just might meet some hot chick while standing in the checkout line.

In your 30s:
Stop what you are doing, put on clean shorts and shirt. Change your shoes. You married a hot chick so no need for much else. Wash your hands and comb your hair. Check yourself in the mirror. Still got it. Add a shot of your favorite cologne to cover the smell.

In your 40s:
Stop what you are doing. Put on a sweatshirt that is long enough to cover the hole in the crotch of your shorts. Put on different shoes and a hat. Wash your hands. Your bottle of Brute is almost empty, so don’t waste any of it on a trip to Lowes. Check yourself in the mirror and do more sucking-in than flexing.

In your 50s:
Stop what your doing, put on a hat, wipe the dirt off your hands onto your shirt. Change shoes because you don’t want to get dog crap in your new car. Check yourself in the mirror and swear not to wear that shirt anymore because it makes you look fat.

In your 60s:
Stop what you are doing. No need for a hat any more. Hose the dog crap off your shoes. The mirror was shattered when you were in your 50s. You hope you have underwear on so nothing hangs out the hole in your pants.

In your 70s:
Stop what you are doing. Wait to go to Lowes until the drug store has your prescriptions ready too. You don’t even notice the dog crap on your shoes. The young thing at the register stares at you and you realize your balls are hanging out the hole in your crotch.

In your 80s:
Stop what you are doing. Start again. Then stop again. Now you remember you need to go to Lowes.  You go to Wal-Mart by mistake. You went to school with the old lady greeter.

In your 90s & beyond:
Something for my garden? Where am I? Why am I reading this? Did I send it? Did you? Who farted?

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My mission for today has been accomplished.  As always, you’re welcome.