There once was a turkey named Dunn
Thanksgiving, for him, wasn’t fun
He was the main source
Of dinner, of course
And when it was through, he was done.
The drinks left for him by each bed,
Had gone straight to old Santa’s head;
He was found off the road,
With an upside-down load,
And himself slumped, dead drunk, in his sled!
There was a young lady named Jo
Who was serviced four times in a row;
When she cried: “Give me more!”
A weak voice from the floor
Protested: “I just can’t, it’s too sore.”
“Far more precious to me than my treasure.”
JB loudly announced, “Is my leisure;
I am happy to screw
The retirement home’s crew –
“They are slow, but that lengthens the pleasure!”
In the street, a big lady from Fareham,
Would take out her tits to compare’em;
She explained: As I’m blessed
With great mounds on my chest,
it’s a bit of a shame not to share’em.
A woman who lived in St. Paul,
Had breasts undeniably small;
Her husband growled: “Dear,
Why not burn your brassiere?
It’s fulfilling no function at all!”
I met a lewd nude in Bermuda,
Who thought she was shrewd, I was shrewder;
She considered it crude
To be wooed in the nude –
I pursued her, subdued her, and screwed her.
Mickey’s is bigger than Dickie’s,
And Dickie’s is bigger than Rickie’s;
I like penises the size
That bring tears to my eyes,
Although small ones are better for quickies.