Archive for the ‘old school’ Tag

03/23/2024 Politically Incorrect Riddles   Leave a comment

Here is another installment of some moderately disgusting 1980’s humor. How can you not appreciate the “good old days” and their “unwoke” attitude?

  • Why are women like pianos? When they’re not up right, their grand!
  • What do you have if you use Kaopectate, Clearasil and birth control pills? No runs, no zits, no errors!
  • What’s the difference between a hold-up and a stick-up? Old age!
  • What are the two stages of being a husband? When you want to be faithful but are not, and when you want to be faithful but cannot!
  • What is it in the spring air that causes girls to get pregnant? Their legs!

  • How many men suffer from wet dreams? Nobody suffers from wet dreams!
  • What’s the difference between a porcupine and a Porsche? The porcupine has the pricks on the outside!
  • Why did the girl take a bath in peroxide? Because she heard that on the whole gentlemen prefer blondes!
  • What is French asthma ? You can only catch your breath in snatches.
  • What’s the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist? A genealogist looks up your family tree, but a gynecologist just peeks inside your bush!

Here is one of my all-time favorites.

What’s the difference between frustration and panic? Frustration is the first time you find that you can’t do it the second time, and panic is the second time find out you can’t do it the first time!

LUV THE EIGHTIES

2/20/2022 Virginity Limericks   Leave a comment

It’s time for another day of limericks. I’ve been lucky enough to have most of the limericks in my files categorized by type. The list of types involves thousands of limericks and today’s topic will be “Virginity”. Since everyone has been a virgin at one time in their life, we should all enjoy these little tidbits of bawdy rhymes.

πŸ†πŸ†πŸ†

“Competition is keen, you agree,”

Said an ancient old flapper from Dee,

So, she dyed her gray tresses,

Chopped a foot from her dresses,

And her reason you plainly can see.

πŸ₯‡πŸ₯‡πŸ₯‡

The bride went up the aisle

In traditional virginal style,

But they say she was nary

An innocent charity,

But a whore from the banks of the Nile.

πŸŽ–πŸŽ–πŸŽ–

There was a young girl named Anheuser

Who said that no man could surprise her.

But Pabst took a chance,

Found Schlitz in her pants,

And now she is sadder Budweiser.

❀❀❀

A lisping young lady named Beth

Was saved from a fate worse than death.

Seven times in a row,

Which unsettled her so

That she quit saying “No” and said “Yeth”.

πŸ₯‰πŸ₯‰πŸ₯‰

You just can’t beat those old-style limericks. I think I actually enjoy them more than most of the newer versions.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?