Archive for the ‘virginity’ Tag
I thought today I would revisit a subject most of you vaguely remember and that is virginity. Some of you will barely remember being a virgin and others of you have yet to lose yours. My virginity has been gone so long I almost don’t remember losing it. These little poems will take us all back to that special day and allow us to reminisce a little. Kindly step into the limerick time machine and remember.
A lisping young lady named Beth
Was saved from a fate worse than death.
Seven times in a row,
Which unsettled her so
That she quit saying “No” and said “Yeth.”
🥰🥰🥰
There was a young fellow named Biddle
Whose girl had to teach him to fiddle.
She grabbed hold of his bow
And said “If you must know,
You can try parting my hair in the middle.
🫤🫤🫤
A religious young lassie named Claire
Was having her first love affair.
As she climbed into bed
She reverently said,
“I wish to be opened with a prayer.”
😎😎😎
There was a young girl from Hoboken
Who claimed that her hymen was broken
From riding a bike
On a cobblestone pike,
But it really was broken from pokin’.
🍆🍩🍆
NUFF SAID
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It’s officially Fall here in Maine. The temperature has fallen and the winter clothing and extra blankets have been unpacked. I’m sure there are snowblowers all over the state being readied for what is sure to be coming. If that doesn’t depress you a little then nothing will. Today’s post contains limericks written in the late sixties and early seventies and should be considered poetry of a sort. They’ve even been categorized to make it easier for me to choose. Today’s theme will be “Virgins”. Enjoy!
*****
There was a young girl named Anheuser
Who said that no man could surprise her.
But Pabst took a chance,
Found Schlitz in her pants,
And now she is sadder Budweiser.
*****
There was a young fellow name Gluck
Who found himself shit-out-of-luck.
Though he petted and wooed,
When he tried to get screwed
He found virgins just don’t give a fuck.
*****
There was a young fellow named Sweeney
Whose girl was a terrible meanie.
The hatch of her snatch
Had a catch that would latch.
She could only be screwed by Houdini.
*****
A religious lassie named Claire
Was having her first love affair.
As she climbed into bed
She reverently said,
“I wish to be opened with prayer.”
*****
HAPPY MONDAY – HAVE A GREAT WEEK
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It’s time for another day of limericks. I’ve been lucky enough to have most of the limericks in my files categorized by type. The list of types involves thousands of limericks and today’s topic will be “Virginity”. Since everyone has been a virgin at one time in their life, we should all enjoy these little tidbits of bawdy rhymes.
🏆🏆🏆
“Competition is keen, you agree,”
Said an ancient old flapper from Dee,
So, she dyed her gray tresses,
Chopped a foot from her dresses,
And her reason you plainly can see.
🥇🥇🥇
The bride went up the aisle
In traditional virginal style,
But they say she was nary
An innocent charity,
But a whore from the banks of the Nile.
🎖🎖🎖
There was a young girl named Anheuser
Who said that no man could surprise her.
But Pabst took a chance,
Found Schlitz in her pants,
And now she is sadder Budweiser.
❤❤❤
A lisping young lady named Beth
Was saved from a fate worse than death.
Seven times in a row,
Which unsettled her so
That she quit saying “No” and said “Yeth”.
🥉🥉🥉
You just can’t beat those old-style limericks. I think I actually enjoy them more than most of the newer versions.
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
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