Archive for February 2013
Women. As any experienced man will tell you they are impossible. Impossible to understand and impossible to deal with at almost any level. It must be genetic because they develop their skill-set at a very early age and spend years fine tuning them. So as a public service to you younger gentlemen out there who are naively preparing to enter the fray, listen up!
Flirting – Women are forever flirting with almost any man who will pay attention to them. I was in line at a food store recently and a young girl no more than 4 years old was sitting in a cart in front of me. She was smiling, being coy, giggling at me for at least fifteen minutes. She was as cute as a button but God help the boys she meets in another ten or fifteen years. She’s already learning the skills needed to befuddle and manipulate them. And now for the big warning guys, don’t let her catch you flirting or you’re a dead man.
Opinions – Learn when to answer and when to stay quiet. A head nod at the right time can save you a great deal of aggravation. Also be careful when asking for an opinion from them. It can be difficult to get a straight answer because they constantly sidestep the question and throw it back to you for your feelings on the matter. Immediately after you give your opinion they disagree and spend ten minutes explaining to you in great detail how misinformed you are.
Driving – Some women insist on driving all of the time which is a vaguely veiled attempt at control. If you’re dumb enough to let them chauffer you then be prepared for the payback. Intentionally driving ten mph under the speed limit while fixing their hair, putting on makeup, texting, or searching the car for a misplaced item, is truly passive-aggressive. OMFG! You watch as she constantly drives with her left tire directly on the centerline of the road. Say nothing as you watch other drivers swerving out of the way to avoid being side swiped. You should know by now that your wrong no matter what.
Double standards – You’ll find her getting annoyed over some trivial issue that you did just once to her but that she does all the time to you. If you call her on it be prepared for a lecture on why your mistaken and why you shouldn’t be annoyed.
Asking impossible questions – Does this dress make my butt look too big? Do you like my hair this color? Does this big gaudy broach look good with this yellow blouse? Does this bra really make my boobs look perky? What are you thinking? Are you staring at that girl in the thong bathing suit? Do you really love me? Need I say more guys?
The Boss – They all want to be the boss. They claim it’s a need to be independent. They desire independence in all things but expect you do everything for them. They will attempt to lecture you on hundreds of things you’ve already accomplished with no experience of their own to draw from. They’ll spend much of your life explaining to you how things should really be done and how they would do it. It’s just another grab for control.
So, I hope you’ve all learned a few things here that might save you a great deal of grief later. If you’re a true masochist like most men are required to be and can put up with all of their BS and control issues you might just get laid one day.
For your sake I hope the sex is mind blowing. Even if it isn’t tell them it is, just saying.
It seems that honoring past presidents has for some reason been relegated to the month of February. I’ve always felt that Presidents Day should be celebrated in and around the 4th of July. It make more sense to me than having every presidents birthday being honored individually which probably explains what it isn’t done that way. What the hell do I know.
I’ve spent a few hours trying to decide on a specific president to discuss and it’s truly been a difficult decision. As I was reading about this one or that one I stumbled on a huge surprise. We’ve had many excellent presidents to be sure and a few real stinkers in recent years. It’s easy to praise Washington, Lincoln, FDR, or JFK, so I won’t do that. I’ve never really read a lot about Harry Truman other than he was a plain talking, kick them in the ass, or drop an A-Bomb on them, kind of guy. Here’s my pleasant surprise of the year so far. I think we need more guys like this.
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Harry Truman was a different kind of President. He probably made as many, or more important decisions regarding our nation’s history as any of the other 42 Presidents preceding him. However, a measure of his greatness may rest on what he did after he left the White House.
The only asset he had when he died was the house he lived in, which was in Independence Missouri. His wife inherited the house from her parents and other than their years in the White House, they lived their entire lives there. When he retired from office in 1952 his income was a U.S. Army pension reported to have been $13,507.72 a year. Congress, noting that he was paying for his own stamps and personally licking them, granted him an ‘allowance’ and, later, a retroactive pension of $25,000 per year.
After President Eisenhower was inaugurated, Harry and Bess drove home to Missouri by themselves. There was no Secret Service protection in those days. When offered corporate positions at large salaries, he declined, stating, "You don’t want me. You want the office of the President, and that doesn’t belong to me. It belongs to the American people and it’s not for sale."
Even later, on May 6, 1971, when Congress was preparing to award him the Medal of Honor on his 87th birthday, he refused to accept it, writing, "I don’t consider that I have done anything which should be the reason for any award, Congressional or otherwise."
As president he paid for all of his own travel expenses and food. Modern politicians have found a new level of success in cashing in on the Presidency, resulting in untold wealth. Today, many in Congress also have found a way to become quite wealthy while enjoying the fruits of their offices.
Good old Harry was correct when he observed, "My choices in life were either to be a piano player in a whore house or a politician. And to tell the truth, there’s hardly any difference!"
We’ll never see another like Harry Truman but we sure could use someone with his courage and good old common sense approach to things. So, happy President’s Day Harry, you deserve being recognized as one who set the bar high and then jumped over it.
I feel so blessed today. In less than two weeks I survived the Storm of the Century and then almost immediately I survived that asteroid that just missed us. I’m a bit of a science nerd and will read anything remotely related to NASA or space travel. I was certainly intrigued when the announcement was made a few weeks ago that an object of this size would do the closest fly-by of the earth ever recorded.
I know just enough about our government and it’s propaganda arm to be a little concerned and skeptical when they say there was no chance of a collision. In my opinion if they were aware that a collision was imminent they wouldn’t tell us anyway. Anarchy and panic would certainly occur if that kind of an announcement were ever made.
So I sat patiently before my TV watching the asteroid live and in black and white as it zoomed on by almost directly over Indonesia. The NASA channel in it’s continuously boring fashion with absolutely no sound and with unrecognizable pictures did nothing to put my mind at ease. After the meteor strikes over Russia the previous day I wasn’t completely convinced we had nothing to worry about.
I suppose the day will arrive eventually when a huge one will hit us and I pray it’s thousands of years from now when technology will hopefully make it a non-problem. I’m not sure about many things but I’m reasonably confident that it will occur someday. I sure hope I’m not around to see it.
Enough about the damn asteroid. How about hearing some completely boring and useless information about my returning again to my remodeling project. I finally reframed the new opening that will eventually lead into my bedroom and I left the drywall intact to keep the dirt and dust from filling the rest of the house. One more bit of framing on the closet and I’ll be ready to begin hanging dry wall. I’ve been taking my time with this damn project but I’m still ahead of the schedule I set for myself. I just wish working with drywall wasn’t so messy. I spend more time cleaning up than actually constructing anything.
I also spent a couple of hours going through a few hundred photographs taken during the last snow storm. Some of them are very cool especially those showing my better-half on her maiden voyage with that big red snow thrower. I caught that look of sheer panic on her face as she began and later the big smile on her face as she conquered her fears and really started enjoying herself. Pretty damn cool if I do say so myself. I used the first photo as my new screensaver because it makes me smile every time I see it.
We’re having visitors tonight with one of them being the new grand child. Eat dinner, a few games of Hearts, and some quality time with the little guy. Not too bad at all.
Valentines Day is over as I write this and we’ve had a great day. My better-half had the day off so we spent the first few hours in bed this morning exchanging cards and gifts and making good use of our quality time. It’s more difficult than I ever thought it would be to have time together. Her schedule makes it somewhat difficult but we’re dealing with it.
Being the loving person that I am I then volunteered to make us a breakfast of bacon, eggs, toast, coffee, and a jar of our home made rhubarb jam. It really started the day off right and gave us a chance to catch up on a host of other matters. We’re trying to make plans for an interesting vacation this summer, where to go, for how long, and all of the other preparations that need to be discussed.
We spent the remainder of the day running errands and just having fun together. We picked up groceries for our evening meal and returned home late in the afternoon. Our late dinner consisted of two excellent steaks, a pile of fried onions, a huge salad, and a bottle of pretty decent wine. We then retired to the living room to watch a new movie I just received as a Valentines Day gift. I laughed until I cried as "Ted" took over our reality for a couple of hours. For me there is nothing better than lot of laughter and we enjoyed the hell out of that movie. She had to be at work at 5:30 am so she was off to bed soon after the movie ended.
I planned to remain awake for just another hour or so to give her a chance to get to sleep and was able to read five or six chapters of a new book I just started. The cat arrived in the living room at his regularly scheduled time, climbed up on the chair, and wished me a Happy Valentines Day in his own weird feline way. He also let me know in no uncertain terms that it was time for bed. I opened the bedroom door and he immediately joined her there.
I ended up reading for quite a while and before I knew it it was 2:00 am. I completed a quick check of the house. picked up a glass of wine, and walked out onto the front deck for a few minutes. It was really cold but the night was crystal clear. I sat for a while on a small bench we left out for these occasions and enjoyed the cold air and the absolute quiet. One of the joys of living in a rural area is the total lack of human background noise which we can only hear if the wind shifts in just the right direction. The cat stuck his nose out the door but refused to join me. I thought someone with a nice thick fur coat like his wouldn’t be put off by the cold all that much but he was. He casually returned to the bedroom to enjoy his most favorite thing, the electric blanket. He was down for the night finally.
All things considered it was a really wonderful Valentines Day. I hope we have many more just like it.
It’s still February, it’s still cold, and I still hate advertisements. Not just a minor dislike but a really white hot hate. Why is it necessary that every building in every city that’s large enough to house a sporting event have a corporate sponsor. I’m starting to believe that the American businesses are doing a lot better than we’ve been told. Spending millions of dollars a year to have your name on an arena would piss me off a great deal if I were a stockholder.
So it’s February, the month with some really lame observances and a couple of so-so holidays. Since my complaint today is with advertisers I must of course mention the upcoming Presidents Day. I love that we still remember and celebrate our founding fathers, Lincoln, Washington, and others. It just seems to me that we’re getting a little redundant with these things. If we have a Presidents Day why is there a need for individual observances for just a few. I’m realize that if we tried to eliminate Presidents Day every car salesman in the country would march on Washington. It could be called The Million Salesmen March of 2013.
I wonder if our Presidents ever gave any thought to just how their likenesses and names would be prostituted for the good of the automobile industry and others. The term “spinning in their graves” immediately comes to mind.
Now to the meat of this posting. I was sitting at home last night minding my own business and attempting to watch one minute of TV without some annoying ad being shoved in my face. Leave it up to some of our sneaky yet loveable Japanese businessmen to come up with this idea. A car commercial for Honda where they have George Washington and Abraham Lincoln singing their theme song as a duet. To say it was disrespectful and tasteless is an understatement. I wonder how those same Japanese businessmen would feel if we used the images of a few of their emperors to sell Domino’s Pizza or possibly women’s feminine products.
Have we in this country become so greedy that nothing is sacred. That was rhetorical because we already know the answer. The United States is losing it’s integrity and it’s soul. We will disrespect absolutely anything regardless of it’s importance to make a buck. Greed is a terrible thing and it’s something that infects almost all of us. Money, Money, Money!
I could go on and on with this but it’s pointless. You already know that its true because you’ve been raised with it and think it’s the norm. I’m here to tell you it’s not. Paying millions of dollars for a minute of Super Bowl time is outrageous and insidious all at the same time. Everywhere you look are ads. On every building, wall, road sign, and of course TV. Thirty percent or more of your TV time is paid advertisements.
Propaganda and brainwashing are frowned upon when it’s a government or a religious cult doing it but totally permissible for every business in this country. We’re at the point where most of the music we walk around humming are commercial theme songs. They’ve taken many of our greatest oldies and turned them into something they were never meant to be. Shame and them and double shame on us for putting up with it.
My rant is over and I wish February was over too.
It’s Valentines Day Eve Eve and I think it’s time to take a closer look at our “Day of Love”. Let’s see, how about some facts on what it will cost you to make the love of your life smile this year. First a little history and then we’ll explore the anticipated costs of your love. for that special person in your life.
The history of Valentines Day goes way back:
- The roots of St. Valentine’s Day can be traced back to the Roman fertility festival of Lupercalia. On Lupercalia, a young man would draw the name of a young woman in a lottery and would then keep the woman as a sexual companion for the year. (This is a lottery you don’t want to lose.)
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In the Middle Ages, young men and women drew names from a bowl to see who their valentines would be. They’d wear these names on their sleeves for one week. Today, to wear your heart on your sleeve means being open and demonstrative with your affections. (A little bit of trivia for you.)
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The Catholic Church struck St. Valentine’s Day from its official calendar in 1969. (Leave it up to the church to be on top of such sinful behavior.)
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The phrase "Sweets for the sweet" is a line from Shakespeare’s Hamlet, Act 5, Scene 1. (I knew reading Shakespeare would pay off some day.)
Never underestimate the power of the almighty dollar. With continuous aggressive campaigns from both greeting card companies and candy manufacturers we don’t stand a freaking chance. Their drumbeat of Valentines Day propaganda has created such a financial windfall they’re forced to keep it going for the survival of their companies. Who pays the bill? Mostly we men do. Here’s the financial estimates":
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Teachers receive the most valentines, followed by kids, mothers, wives and sweethearts.
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Over 50 percent of all Valentine’s Day cards are purchased in the six days prior to the holiday.
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One billion valentines are sent each year worldwide, making it the second largest card-sending holiday of the year behind Christmas. Women purchase approximately 85 percent of all valentines (What a surprise!).
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More than one-third of men would prefer not receiving a gift. Less than 20 percent of women feel the same way.
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Around this season, a dozen long-stemmed roses can cost an average of $75, or about 30% more than the normal price of $58. (It’s just a coincidence the costs increase every February.)
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More than nine million pet owners are expected to buy gifts for their pets this Valentine’s Day. (Morons!)
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15 percent of U.S. women (just the losers) send themselves flowers on Valentine’s Day.
The Valentine’s Day money making machine also effects many other connected businesses who need to keep this holiday on everyone’s mind.
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According to the condom company Durex, condom sales are highest around Valentine’s Day, which are 20 percent to 30 percent higher than usual.
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More at-home pregnancy tests are sold in March than in any other month.
While the men in the US seem to pay a majority of the Valentines Day expenses my sympathies go out to the Japanese as well. In Japan, women are expected to give chocolate and other gifts to their men on Valentine’s Day. This tradition was started as a marketing campaign by a number of Japanese chocolate companies, of course. Men aren’t off the hook though, they’re expected to return the favor to their ladies on March 14th, commonly known as White Day.
I hope this helps put Valentines Day into it’s proper perspective for you. If you follow the unspoken rules laid down by years of tradition and retail propaganda you’ll get to see that big smile on your loved ones face for a least a day.
Happy Valentines Day
Happy Birthday Mr. Lincoln! This is the month where we celebrate the life and death of Abraham Lincoln. One of the most challenged presidents who won a war but eventually lost his life to a assassin.
The people in this country hold those presidents killed in office close to their hearts. John Kennedy is another perfect example. Over the decades many comparisons have been drawn between Lincoln and Kennedy. The following information has been around for many years and has fascinated almost everyone who’s read it. I post it on or about the same time every year and reading it again still puzzles and amazes me. Read it yourself and then tell me how it’s possible for these facts to be true.
Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.
Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.
The names Lincoln and Kennedy each contain seven letters.
Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
Both wives lost children while living in the White House.
Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both Presidents were shot in the head.
Lincoln’s secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy’s secretary was named Lincoln.
Both were assassinated by Southerners.
Both were succeeded by Southerners.
Both successors were named Johnson.
Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.
John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.
Both assassins were known by their three names.
Both names are composed of fifteen letters.
Lincoln was shot at the theater named "Kennedy."
Kennedy was shot in a car called "Lincoln."
Booth ran from the theater and was caught in a warehouse.
Oswald ran from a warehouse and was caught in a theater.
Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.
Over the years I’ve investigated thousands of criminal cases and the one thing that remained constant was rule #1 as taught to me by the men who trained me, “there are no coincidences”. If that remains true then I have no explanation whatsoever as to the above facts. Do you?
Tonight I’m sitting alone in my bedroom writing this posting because I’ve been officially banished from the living room by my better-half. I suppose this is my punishment for refusing to watch the red carpet nonsense prior to the Grammy’s.
This is what happens every year and believe me I accept this isolation gladly. My life has never been so boring that I need a night of Beyoncé, Jayzee, Jennifer Lopez, and all of the other alleged musical geniuses. I’d make two exceptions if I could. If someone could arrange to have Taylor Swift and/or Katy Perry stop at my place tonight I’d do everything in my power to keep them entertained. To quote a old song I that I love: “wishing and hoping, singing and praying, planning and dreaming. . .
Today was a bit of a let down after the weekend storm but everything is business as usual in the area. It doesn’t take long for people living in Maine to bounce back because we’re used to a lot of snow and are well prepared to handle it. I guess it’s always a good thing to have a few days of excitement. It keeps things interesting and gives us a few war stories for the next year or two.
I finished making and canning my batch of Tropical Salsa this morning. I thought it was pretty good but it isn’t officially edible until approved by my better-half. If I can get her to actually admit she likes it then I’m golden. I’ll be sending a few samples around tomorrow to some friends for what will be a brutal but honest evaluation. I really think it will make an excellent side dish for quite a few of our sea food dishes.
Now that I have a few hours of quiet time thanks to the Grammy’s I can do some reading. I decided I wanted to read something with a story that’s long, detailed, and in depth. So I’m going to retread the trilogy by the late Stieg Larsson which is a complex set of lengthy mysteries totaling approximately 2180 pages. The first book has received a lot of press in recent months with a movie already made. The books are; The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, The Girl Who Played With Fire, and The Girl Who Kicked the Hornets Nest. I first read the stories last summer but didn’t take the time to really enjoy them. This time I’ll read it slowly and really savor the incredible details of the stories and their characters. That should keep me reading until the winter is just about over.
I’m planning a tour of the general area tomorrow to take a few photos and walk the beaches for a while. I can get a better idea of just how bad the storm was and hopefully document some of the damage.
It’s a cold night and I’m snuggled in a warm bed with my IPad. Very nice.
Nemo is dead, long live the king. The final tally for our area of Maine was approximately 38 inches of snow and one hell of a wind storm. We have a few drifts of five or six feet but nothing more serious than that. It could have been a whole lot worse.
After all of the snow-blowing today I won’t be able to left my arms tomorrow. I think I’ve finally bonded with this new snow-thrower, it’s now my BFF. It took a good part of the day to clear the driveway and then more disappointment. There was so much snow on the roads that the plows weren’t able to arrive until late afternoon. Even then they were only able to clear one lane in the middle of the road.
I’m hoping they’re able to widen the lanes a little more so we an get out of here for a while tomorrow. Even the birds were having serious issues trying to hang onto the bird feeder in a thirty-five mph wind. Not only were they fighting amongst themselves for the food but also fighting for a place on the bird feeder that offered some protection from the wind.
Our neighbors were out in force in mid-afternoon as the snow gradually stopped. It was nice to see everyone helping each other for a change in a neighborhood where individual privacy is the norm.
My better-half spent a lot of time emailing and connecting with family members from areas unaffected by the storm. She was also distributing photo’s far and wide to almost everyone. I feel for anyone who might have been caught in this blizzard with vehicle problems or medical emergencies. This kind of weather is definitely life threatening if not taken seriously.
The only good news for most of the state was the low number of power outages. We managed to escape the massive outages suffered in past storms due to a great deal of work by tree trimming crews throughout the summer months who cut down what would have been snow laden branches. Kudos to Central Maine Power and the local towns whose preventative work paid off in a big way.
I’ll be spending a few hours tomorrow in the final cleanup and then life will return to normal. I’m been hearing rumblings of another storm approaching in a few days and I hope to God it’s a little less of a problem than this one.
Everyone will be back to work tomorrow and life goes on. I’m really proud of myself because if what the media says is true (sarcasm), I’ve just survived my thirteenth "Storm of the Century". I think I should get some kind of honorable mention somewhere in that Guinness Book of World Records.
I won’t hold my breath though. Enjoy your day while I return to the cleanup.
This posting was written about my activities yesterday but I‘m was late getting it posted due to todays activities. More information tomorrow about that but today we have 33 inches on the ground as of noon with another 6-8 expected before this mother of a storm winds down. Back to yesterday.
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Well we’re fully prepared for this storm or I hope we are. We’ve got six inches on the ground with a lot more to come. My better-half decided we needed to run out for a few things before it got too much worse. I can’t believe I agreed to it but I did.
Traffic is still pretty heavy with people shopping for a few last minute necessities. The shelves of the store looked like a gang of barbarians were shopping there. I was looking for guava and papaya and even that was almost sold out. I guess the first thing you go for before a huge snow storm are cans of tropical fruit. The place was packed with people buying all the bread, milk, and toilet paper the media has been telling them they need.
I mistakenly thought by buying only four items I could run in and right back out. Who’s the moron now? That would be me of course. I was twenty-first in line at the 20 items or less register. I had to wait an additional twenty minutes while the twenty people ahead of me with their filled carts checked out. Thank God I’m a calm person and not some pissed off crazed postal worker. It could have been really ugly.
Well, we’re back home now without incident and the snow is picking up somewhat. The better-half is dealing with the storm like she does with everything else, she’s baking cookies. I have no idea why and I’m certainly not going to ask. I can’t say too much to her since I’m in the process of preparing my ingredients to make a tropical salsa which should look pretty, taste wonderful, and have enough heat to get your attention.
It’s later now and I just returned from my third snow-blowing effort to keep the driveway as clear as possible. Each time I’ve removed four or five inches of snow and I’m hoping against hope that we don’t get buried with what’s coming later tonight and early tomorrow morning. The wind is picking up and it’s too cold to stay out for too long. I’ll make one more pass at eleven and I’ll be off off to bed.
Tomorrow morning will be interesting. The neighborhood hasn’t lost power so that’s a plus. Now I can catch a few hours of sleep and dream about snow.
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