Archive for the ‘60’s limericks’ Tag
It’s another gray and rainy day here in Maine which always gives me a terrible case of the blahs. So, this is the perfect day for me to return to my easel and complete some art projects that I’ve had going on for some weeks now. I can just relax and get into “the zone” while working on these projects which helps me forget what a really crappy day it is. With that thought in mind, I dug into my archives of old limericks for a selection dated in the late 1960’s and early 1970’s. Maybe one or more of them will make you smile a bit, who knows? For the most part they are rated PG.
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A virgin emerged from her bath
In a state of righteous wrath,
For she had been deflowered
When she bent as she showered,
And the handle was right in the path.
💥💥
A born again Christian named Claire
Was having her first love affair.
As she climbed into bed
She reverently said,
“I wish to be opened with prayer.”
💥💥💥
A penny-less colleague named Cy,
Remark to a lass passing by,
“I’ve never adjusted
To being flat busted.”
Said she, with a sigh, “Nor have I.”
💥💥💥💥
There was a young fellow named Dice
Who remarked, ‘They say bigamy’s nice.
Even two is a bore
I prefer three or four,
For the plural of spouse, it is spice.”
One of my Fav’s.
An organic chemist soon found,
While pushing aminos around,
He’d no sense of smell,
And couldn’t quite tell
His acids from holes in the ground.
🤪🤪🤪
I’ve spent most of my day dealing with a belligerent computer program that refuses to do its job. I shouldn’t be too upset since it’s a program I purchased about 10 years ago. I suspect that it has finally gotten to the point where my new computer is more than it can handle. It was a program used to write what I spoke. Now I’ll be forced to step back a few years and begin typing everything myself. I suppose I’ve gotten a little lazy over the years relying on that software. That being said I’m posting a few limericks today that were originally written sometime prior to 1960. Enjoy them unedited.
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There once was a fellow named Abbott
Who made love to girls as a habit.
But he ran for the door
When one girl asked for more,
And exclaimed “I’m a man, not a rabbit.”
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There was a young lady named Frances
Who suffered embarrassing trances.
She stripped to the skin
Before Father Flynn
And made him indecent advances.
💥💥💥
A naked young tart named Roselle
Walked the streets while ringing a bell.
When asked why she rang it
She answered, “Gol dang it!
Can’t you see I something to sell?”
💥💥💥💥
To Sadie the touch of a male meant
An emotional cardiac ailment.
And acute shortness of breath
Caused her untimely death
😛😛😛😛😛
OLDIES BUT GOODIES
It’s time for some limerick history. As you may be aware I collect limericks from all sorts of sources. Recently I purchased a few small used books from an online thrift bookstore. Buying books in bulk is always a risk but sometimes it pays off with pleasant surprises. Today’s limericks were published in a small inconsequential book of just sixty pages in 1960. It’s been 64 years since then and many of the limericks in the book were collected from even older sources. They are officially titled “Laundered Limericks” meaning many were cleaned of obscenities to get them printed but still contain some vulgarities. I’d probably rate some of these as PG but that’s for you readers to decide.
An old maid in the land of Aloha
Got wrapped in the coils of a boa.
And as the snake squeezed
The maid, not displeased,
Cried, “Darling! I love it! Samoa!”
🙃🙃🙃
There was a young lady named Gloria
Who was screwed by Sir Oswald Du Maurier,
And then by six men,
Sir Oswald again,
And the band at the Waldorf-Astoria.
😎😎😎
There once was a man of high station
Who was found by a pious relation,
Making love on the floor,
To – I won’t say a whore,
But a lady of poor reputation.
😉😉😉
A remarkable race are the Persians,
They have such peculiar diversions.
They make love all day
In the regular way
And all night they practice perversions.
🤪🤪🤪
GOTTA LUV THEM 60’S
To those of you who were alive in the 1960’s, you know what a strange time it was not only for the country but for each of us individually. Free love, drugs, rock & roll, and anti-war fever made for interesting relationships and all the craziness you could possibly handle. I have to say I enjoyed the hell out of it. With that in mind I’m offering up a few limericks from the early sixties that you might find interesting. Put on your bell-bottoms and roll up a “J” and enjoy.
😎😎😎
A gorgeous voluptuous creature
Seduced a young Methodist preacher.
It worked out quite well,
For under his spell
This gal’s now a Sunday school teacher.
😤😤😤
There was an old lecher named Gus
Who wore a horrible truss.
It would pinch, sweat and itch,
When the son of a bitch
Got too close to young girls on the bus.
🥴🥴🥴
To Sadie the touch of a male meant
A rather emotional cardiac ailment.
And acute shortness of breath
Caused her untimely death
In the course of erotic impalement.
🤤🤤🤤
PASS THE BONG
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