Archive for the ‘drugs’ Tag

06-01-2018 Things That Really Bore Me!   Leave a comment

In the past I’ve created lists of things I love and things I hate.  After roaming around for the last few months and people watching it occurred to me that another category needed to be documented.  Here is my list of things that have morphed from ‘Things That Annoy Me’ to ‘Things That Bore Me’.

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Drug companies and their endless advertisements to cure damn near everything. In most cases you’d need a small mortgage to pay for them but at least the side effects are free.

Organic labeling normally just pisses me off but I’ve come to realize if people are stupid enough to buy the “organic” song and dance then there’s nothing I can do. To quote one of my favorite comics, Ron White . . .  You can’t fix stupid!

Anyone named Obama or Bush. No further explanation is needed or wanted.

AARP Mailings. I refuse to belong to any organization of liberal leaning seniors that enjoys sucking up to the Dems for more government handouts. You’d think that their current government subsidies would be enough.

Any bumper sticker that insists on telling me things I could care less about. I don’t really care what your children are doing or where they’re doing it. It’s just more eye litter.

SPAM in all it’s forms.

Verizon Wireless and their need to call me ten times a week because I’m now eligible for an upgrade on my cell phone. I’ve already blocked 26 of their numbers but they continue to annoy me from every state in the country.

Hilary Clinton and her endless health problems, her endless mental problems, and of course her endless marital problem, WILD BILL.

Maxine Waters. It’s time for a rubber room and a straight jacket for this wingnut.

The Maine Stream Media in all of it’s manifestations.

George “I Want to be King of the World.” Soros.

Trump Bashing.

Trump Bashers.

Hollywood idiots voicing their opinions about what they think on every topic except their acting, singing, or dancing.

Tipping waiters and waitresses when I’m now doing most of their work. Table computers are fine if I can cut my normal tip in half. All the waitresses do these days is deliver the meal and smile pretty. I think that’s worth no more than a 3 percent tip.

Facebook and Twitter. They should really be on the list of things that annoy me but they bore me as well.

The egocentric morons who frequent most retail stores and are always in line at the register directly in front of me.  Where’s my stun gun when I need it.

Bait and Switch is one of the oldest and most misleading types of advertisement. It seems to have become much more commonplace that ever before.

Men talking to me while we’re standing at a urinal. I guess they don’t fully understand how focused I need to be while peeing. Talking is OK I guess but no peeking please.

Cell phone ringtones. Enough already . . . I don’t give a shit that you got email. Put it on vibrate moron.

Facial tattoos. It’s an instant judgement call when I see a person with them. Idiot, dumb ass, or moron, take your pick.

The new and improved Leggings fad. I admit that in many cases they just make my day but whatever you do don’t go into Walmart. You could be struck blind if you’re lucky.

Baseball caps worn backward. Any idiot that still thinks this is cool should get a free facial tattoo.

Homeless beggars. I hesitate giving money or cans to someone who is supposedly poor and unemployed while he’s wearing a better pair of Nike shoes than I have.

President Trumps continual tweeting. Just ridiculous.

Katy Perry. Sing a song, leave the stage, marry an asshole, cut off your hair, and then tell me what a political moron I must be for not supporting Hilary. God women . . . Get a frigging life.

Sex with lifelike robots. Only two terms comes to mind immediately, “Organ Grinder” and “Ex Wife”. Way too scary for me. Thanks but no thanks. Yikes!!!

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11-10-2015 Journal–My Favorite Addictions!   Leave a comment

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I’m one of those boring people who feels the need to constantly examine my life.  I look at my past and judge myself, I look at my present and judge myself, and finally I look at my possible futures and judge that too. Also if I’m given the opportunity I’ll judge you as well. So not only am I a borderline addictive personality I’m a bit judgmental.

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I’ve always suspected I had issues with addiction but never tried to delve into the why’s and wherefores until now. My list of addictions is long and began back when I was just an newborn infant. Here’s my list from my formative years in no particular order of importance:

Breathing

Breasts

Breast milk

Diapers

I was able to finally work through those minor addictions without the assistance of an expensive rehab program. I was well on my way to puberty where my list began to grow and become more interesting. 

Breasts

Legs

Butts

Pornography

Sex

Puberty not only changed me physically but also intellectually. I understood at age thirteen that these addictions unlike my toddler list would likely become permanent.  And guess what? I was somewhat correct. I resigned myself to learning to live with my addictions and to make the best of them. It was a dirty job but I stepped up and made the required personality adjustments to deal with them.

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My teen years were interesting and a little frightening. My list again changed but was still manageable:

Sex

Breasts

Legs

French Blondes

Cigarettes

Beer

Pornography

College brought more changes and not all of them good. As the list increased so did my stress levels as you can plainly see:

Sex

Oral Sex

Brunettes

Blondes

Red Heads

Breasts

Beer

Whiskey

Marijuana

Wine

I learned a lot in those years but realized my life was in a rut so I dropped out of college and enlisted in the Army one step ahead of the draft board. This began another long, interesting, and scary adventure. Once more my list expanded a bit:

Sex

Oral sex

Oriental Women

Black Hair

Whiskey

Coffee

Cigarettes

Beer

Marijuana

Speed

Adrenaline

Wine

I returned home a few years later, much wiser and a much less addicted person. I was able to rid myself of many of my stupid addictions over the next two decades. Here are the final results after many years of really hard work:

Any Sex

Breasts

Coffee

Reading

Photography

Computers

Chocolate

Wine

Exercise

As you can see most of the exciting addictions in my life have slowly faded away.  They were fun while they lasted but were discarded when they became dangerous or harmful.  I’m now a much wiser and more boring person and I have to admit as I sit here quietly judging myself, I miss some of them a lot. 

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My list is certainly smaller but less dangerous and easily managed now. I expect this final list will remain with me forever. 

The only addiction that stayed with me from infancy to the present day are “Breasts”. There’s no rehab programs to help me deal with them and I’m pretty happy about that. So thanks again Mom for the one lifelong addiction I’ve enjoyed the most and will continue to enjoy until the lid slams shut. I’d love to see the 12 step program for that addiction.

I know one thing for sure, I’d never miss a meeting.

03-21-2015 Journal–Medi(I Don’t Really)care!   Leave a comment

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Well I guess the world can continue to rotate around the sun and all of you can continue living your exciting lives once again.  I received a clean bill of health from my doctor during my recent checkup so everyone can relax again for another year just knowing I’ll still be around.

Have I ever mentioned just how much I hate doctors and hospitals? I’m positive you have no idea just how much. I spent a lot of my youth visiting uncounted  hospitals throughout the Pittsburgh area while visiting my mother who was afflicted with every disease known to man during her life.  I became almost phobic about it.  I was terrified of entering hospitals and getting stuck with needles. For years every time I needed a blood test or a shot it usually caused me to become violently ill or to pass out completely.  That phobia was finally dealt with when it became time for me to leave the Army.  A blood test was required before I could be released from the service and I certainly wasn’t going to stick around any longer than necessary.  I sat quietly while they took six tubes of blood and suffered no ill effects whatsoever.  It’s amazing what proper motivation can do to help you get through the tough times.

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I have no phobias now but I still hate hospitals and doctors.  I’m good to go until sometime in August when my new doctor will put me through my paces once again.  Blood tests, poking and prodding of body parts best left alone, and more of those miracle vaccines and shots that may or may not even work. Getting old requires more and more maintenance of the body and mind just to maintain the status quo. Regardless we eventually all lose that battle.  More exercise, less alcohol, no smoking, healthy foods, and an endless supply of drugs, drugs, drugs. 

When I turned fifty the medical community found out about me and the process began in earnest. I needed a shingles shot, a pneumonia shot, a tetanus booster which probably cost the insurance carriers at least $500.00. Increased visits, regular colonoscopies, and future eye surgery to fix those pesky cataract problems we all have to deal with at some point. 

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I’m one of millions of Boomers whose current responsibility is to stay alive as long as possible to help keep the health care community in business.  What will happen to the system once we’ve all passed on.  That will be the new healthcare crisis with lots of layoffs, hospital closures, and a serious overpopulation of doctors, nurses, and home care specialists.  I guess we Baby Boomers could be called a massive health care asset until we all finally die.

02-05-2015 Journal – Snowy Storm & Laxatives!   Leave a comment

It’s Thursday morning and I’ve just arrived home from the hospital. My hopes for a clean report on my colonoscopy are again disappointing.  After a thorough scoping by a very competent doctor he found  one stinking polyp. It was too large to burn off so he snipped a chunk from it for further testing.  He assured me that 90% of all these polyps are normally benign. So for now I’ll be forced to go with that all the while keeping my fingers crossed.

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‘Yuck + Yuck + Yuck = My Night’

You should know that the 36 hours before the colonoscopy were absolute hell. I’ve been through a number of colonoscopy cleansings and as this one began I was happy at just how easy it seemed to be going.  The laxative pills were small and harmless looking, the Gatorade didn’t taste too bad, and the laxative powder that went into the Gatorade looked innocent enough.  Will I never learn.

I began by taking two pills and then drinking four classes of the laxative laced Gatorade every 30 minutes.  I took a break and drink just plain water for an hour and then drank another glass full every half-hour until it was all gone. At 10 pm I was to take two more pills, drink a few more glasses of water and wait.  Let me tell you a little secret,  I didn’t have to wait very long. 

Just after I went to bed all hell broke loose in my body. It was back and forth to the bathroom with each trip becoming more urgent than the last.  I won’t try to describe the nastiness that occurred between  two and three in the morning. All I’ll say is that at 2 am I was forced into taking an emergency shower, then forced to mop the bathroom floor, and later to strip my bed and do an emergency load of laundry.  It was ugly, nasty, humiliating, and unforgettable.

With the results from todays explorations I’m to remain in the five year rotation for future colonoscopies. It seems those folks in my gene pool passed along some of their more depressing traits to yours truly. The story of my effing life.

‘’DSC_0008’Looking Out the Front Window Today’

I’ve just had my first solid food in the last forty-eight hours and it was fantastic.  I’ve been ordered to take it easy for the rest of the day and to get some well needed nap time. There’s really nothing much more to blog about today except for the damn snow storm raging outside my window.  I’ll hibernate for the remainder of the  week and hopefully get things back to normal by the weekend. 

I’m sure glad this is over with.

11-25-2013 Are You an AAADD Sufferer?   4 comments

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This disclaimer is for those of you who are militant believers in all of these syndromes.  This posting is being written as humor with just a hint of the truth.  If you have no sense of humor then stop reading now because this will almost certainly anger you.  If you chose to continue please keep your caustic comments to yourself, they won’t be posted.

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These days it seems like everyone regardless of age or gender is suffering a syndrome of one kind or another.  This permits them to be stupid, annoying, and in general a huge pain in the ass without consequences.  If your child is undisciplined  and does pretty much what they please without any obvious parental control, they suffer from ADS.  Load them with a few drugs to maintain control in the classrooms and everything will be just fine.

Then they can grow into an annoying and undisciplined adult and be diagnosed with AADS.  More drugs and again less responsibility for bad behavior.

We have ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) and if that’s not good enough we also have ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder).  Both children and adults can now claim any of these disorders hoping for more drugs and less responsibility for their questionable rude behavior.

Were you also aware of the cottage industry that has blossomed for those poor and suffering souls afflicted with one or many of these disorders.  The first thing you should do is become an official member of CHADD.  This description was taken directly from their web-site.

Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD), is a national non-profit, tax-exempt (Section 501(c)(3)) organization providing education, advocacy and support for individuals with ADHD. In addition to our informative website, CHADD also publishes a variety of printed materials to keep members and professionals current on research advances, medications, and treatments affecting individuals with ADHD. These materials include Attention magazine and a free electronically mailed informational newsletter, as well as other publications of specific interest to educators, professionals, adults with ADHD, and parents.

As you can see it’s becoming an official part of our laundry list of disorders.  Pick the one that fits best, talk with a friendly doctor and make the diagnosis official.  Then present it to the school or your employer and expect special treatment from the entire world for the rest of your life. 

Why should I be left out?  Here’s a new disorder that I recently discovered quite by accident and I suspect there are millions of other sufferers nationwide that need to be told what’s wrong with them.  My new disorder is called AAADD or Age-Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it works…

I decide to do my laundry. I start down the hall and notice the newspaper on the table. OK, I’m going to do the laundry…

BUT FIRST I’m going to read the newspaper. After that, I notice the mail on the table. OK, I’ll just put the newspaper in the recycle stack….

BUT FIRST I’ll look through the pile of mail and see if there are any bills to be paid. Yes. Now where is the checkbook?

Oops.. there’s the empty glass from yesterday on the coffee table. I’m going to look for that checkbook…

BUT FIRST I need to put the glass in the sink.

I head for the kitchen, look out the window, notice my poor flowers need a drink of water, I put the glass in the sink and there’s the remote for the TV on the kitchen counter. What’s it doing here? I’ll just put it away…

BUT FIRST I need to water those plants. I head for the door and…Aaaagh! stepped on the cat. Cat needs to be fed. Okay, I’ll put the remote away and water the plants…

BUT FIRST I need to feed the cat.

END OF DAY: Laundry is not done, newspapers are still on the floor, glass is still in the sink, bills are not paid, checkbook is still lost, and the cat ate the remote control… And, when I try to figure out how come nothing got done today, I’m baffled because…I KNOW I WAS BUSY ALL DAY!

I realize this condition is serious…I’d get help… BUT FIRST…I think I’ll check my e-mail.

I need to quickly recruit a few hundred individuals interested in forming a non-profit organization to help spread the word to the world about this terrible albeit understandable age related problem.  How about we start the ASS-ASS organization, American Society of Silly -  Aged Seniors Sufferers

Join up with ASS–ASS immediately all of you poor suffering and aging old bastards.

REPRESENT ! ! !

02-23-2013   5 comments

As I sit here today watching the freaking snow come down I’m a little irked because I have a few people in my life who’ve labeled me a ‘neat freak’.  I’ve never been too fond of that negative terminology or the term OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) but I suppose in the end it’s probably true to a degree.  Looking through my family tree for any proof of a ‘neat’ gene was no help at all. Believe me there is no indication whatsoever that anyone in my family was ever ‘neat’ at the level I seem to be.  I have to admit that my nephew in Texas shows some minor  indicators but not near the level I’ve reached.

These days it seems this condition is all the rage but they (the experts) have come up with a number of new names for what they deem a terrible affliction, ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder), ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) immediately comes to mind, and OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder).

Just another excuse to bang the prescription drug drum.  More drugs, take more drugs, buy more drugs, and everything will be just fine. Take the small children who may act up slightly in school, diagnose them with a myriad of alphabet diseases, and immediately put them onto some sort of drug regimen.  The teachers apparently need their classes to be totally calm and controllable  or they just can’t get the job done.    Everyone knows its always much easier to control a room full of zombies than a bunch of excited children.
I agree there are some children and adults who are at the extreme end of hyperactivity and may need some sort of medication to calm them but not at the levels we’re currently seeing.

I feel for those people and can’t begin to imagine trying to live a normal life if my ‘neat freak’ affliction were twice as bad as it is.  Unfortunately thousands of young children are automatically labeled with OCD, ADD, or ADHD which will then follow them for the rest of their lives.  It not only colors how other people see them but how they see themselves.  It actually in some cases can give them an excuse for continued bad behavior.  "I’m OCD, it’s not my fault, my parents forgot to give me my pills this morning."

My sympathies go out to those people suffering with severe cases of this affliction.  My sympathies also go out to the thousands of young children who are being medicated unnecessarily in order to maintain some sort of control in the schools.  Being a smart ass with a wise mouth doesn’t make you ADD, ADHD, OCD, or anything else.  It just makes you a smart ass with a big mouth who should not be considered a candidate for drugging.

I’m sure that some of you will be pissed off and disagree with me completely.  That’s your prerogative but it won’t change in any way what I think or feel on the subject.  For those of you who want to rant and rave at me, feel free.

Posted February 24, 2013 by Every Useless Thing in Just Saying, Just Saying Again

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