Archive for the ‘january’ Tag

01-19-2016 Journal – January Blahs!   Leave a comment

th5146B9DD
Maine has finally found it’s typical winter weather. No more warmth, no more green anything, just ice, snow, frigid cold, and nothing much else in sight for at least another three months.  Just great . . .

Now that the holidays have come and gone and things have calmed down a little we can now ready ourselves for the next fiasco, Valentine’s Day. I won’t go into my normal rant about crappy made-up holidays but I’m not too excited by it. I was hoping the Super Bowl might get me interested in something but since my team was crushed by Denver . . . .  who cares.

thW5PQLX7F
This time of the year wears on a person like nothing else. Too much time to think and to reexamine your life and the prospects for the future. I have to say even that gets boring as hell after a while.  Right in the middle of all of this I received news of the passing of a good friend.  He was my ex-brother-in-law and a kindred spirit for almost twenty years.  I always admired him for his intellect, his terrific sense of humor, and his competitive spirit. My divorce separated me from my ex-wife and unfortunately for me I lost contact with him and his family as well. There was very little I could do about it.

thU4EVP7YL
In recent years he’d been suffering from illnesses that finally took his life. It was a huge loss for his wife, children, and grand children and for me as well. Just one more thing to think about on these gray and cold days of winter.

I’m forced to fall back on my sketching and painting to keep my mind right. I know it’s getting bad when I’m starting to get excited about having my car inspected in February.

R.I.P. JOHN

01-20-2015–January Daily Observances!   Leave a comment

thKERC419T

‘This doesn’t fall in January but I like it anyway.”

We all love observances or so it seems.  I’ve never seen or understood why they’re so necessary.  It seems that if more than three people get together and agree on  something it immediately becomes necessary to make the entire country aware of it. So they submit a request to one of our overpaid and more times than not incompetent politicians requesting a day be set forth for a celebration of their oh so important subject. 

Politicians who are consumed with getting reelected will prostitute themselves in any way for recognition, no matter how stupid or inane the request might be.   Since January and February are such slow months they seem to have plenty of time on their hands for these Monthly, Weekly,  and Daily observances.  A small portion seem reasonable but the vast majority are just so much fluff and utter nonsense. This post will be my PSA (Public Service Announcement) for the first quarter of this year.  The following list contains only a portion of the large number of daily observances for January.  Some are funny, most are stupid, and some I have no idea what they mean or what they’re meant to accomplish. 

  • Asarah B’Tevet Day: 1  A SHOULDER SHRUG AND PUZZLED LOOK HERE.
  • Euro Day: 1  WHO REALLY CARES?
  • First Foot Day: 1
  • New Year’s Dishonor List Day: 1   
  • Z Day: 1  WHO KNOWS WHAT THIS IS FOR?
  • Happy Mew Year for Cats Day: 2 SO FREAKING LAME.
  • Drinking Straw Day: 3
  • Fruitcake Toss Day: 3  THIS MIGHT BE REFERRING TO THE POLITICIANS.
  • *Memento Mori "Remember You Die" Day: 3
  • Dimpled Chad Day: 4  ANOTHER DEMOCRAT FROM FLORIDA I’LL BET.
  • Tom Thumb Day: 4
  • Bird Day: 5  I’VE GOT A BIRD FOR THEM RIGHT HERE.
  • "Thank God It’s Monday" Day: 5
  • I’m Not Going To Take It Anymore Day: 7
  • National Tempura Day: 7

The list continues but I promise you they don’t get any better.  The further along we go the worse it seems to get. 

  • Argyle Day: 8
  • Bubble Bath Day: 8
  • National English Toffee Day: 8
  • National Bubble Bath Day: 8
  • National Joy Germ Day: 8
  • Balloon Ascension Day: 9
  • National Cassoulet Day: 9  I HAVE NO CLUE ON THIS ONE.
  • National Static Electricity Day: 9
  • Learn Your Name in Morse Code Day: 11  THIS IS SOOO CRUCIAL.
  • No Pants Subway Ride Day: 11  THIS SHOULD BE A NEW YORK HOLIDAY.
  • Kiss A Ginger (Red Heads) Day: 12  THOUGHT UP BY A PISSED OFF RED HEAD.
  • Rubber Duckie Day: 13
  • Caesarean Section Day: 14  WHO WANTS TO CELEBRATE THIS?
  • Dress Up Your Pet Day: 14  TO STUPID TO BE BELIEVED.

th7LUIHCVT

‘Is there a ribbon for Stupid?”

I just wonder how much time is wasted by our overpaid politicians to process these stupid requests and present them for an official vote.  What special interest groups could some of these possibly represent?

  • Appreciate A Dragon Day: 16
  • Fig Newton Day: 16
  • International Fetish Day: 16  A FAVORITE OF MOST POLITICIANS.
  • Nothing Day: 16  AMEN TO THIS.
  • Tu B’shuvt: 16  HAVEN’T A CLUE.
  • Cable Car Day: 17
  • Tin Can Day: 19
  • Penguin Awareness Day: 20
  • National Disc Jockey Day: 20
  • Squirrel Appreciation Day: 21  THIS IS NUTS.

I know, I know, it’s also hard for me to believe that this partial list continues on.  Just be glad I didn’t list everything else that I found for January or you’d be reading for another twenty minutes.

  • Answer Your Cat’s Questions Day: 22 IF YOUR CAT ANSWERS GIVE ME A CALL.

I find it really interesting and ironic that the following two observances fall on the same day.

  • Celebration of Life Day: 22 
  • Roe vs. Wade Day: 22

Back to the last few entries for this embarrassing display of political patronage and political correctness.

  • Snowplow Mailbox Hockey Day: 23  I CELEBRATE THIS DAY AFTER EVERY SNOW STORM.
  • Beer Can Day: 24  MY BETTER-HALF IS THE POSTER GIRL ON THIS ONE.
  • Talk Like A Grizzled Prospector Day: 24
  • Bubble Wrap Appreciation Day: 26
  • National Kazoo Day: 28  HERE’S ONE MORE THING TO HUM ON.
  • Inane Answering Message Day: 30
  • Appreciate Your Social Security Check Day: 31 

That’s it for today.  You now know way more about January observances than you’ve ever wanted.   I deeply apologize but I feel these days must be recognized and celebrated because our politicians say so. NOT!!!

01-06-2013   Leave a comment

Today is one of those dead days after the holidays where everyone is dragging ass with the loss of all that holiday adrenaline.  I’ve decided I need to talk about politics for a bit after perusing the monthly observances listed for January.

Today is January 6th and I’ve discovered something earth shattering.  The politicians must be losing their edge because not only have they chosen not to observe the 6th as Sherlock Holmes’s birthday which almost but not quite pisses me off, they’ve completely ignored the 6th for any type of recognition. While the 6th of January is included in some of the lame ass weekly observances, it doesn’t have a day of it’s own.  How could our narcissistic and self-serving politico’s miss an opportunity like that.  There’s a day for damn near everything and a few days that have multiple  observances, so what the hell is wrong with the 6th of January?

Maybe it’s time for us to help those poor underpaid politicians do their job in a more proper fashion. How about we have the 6th remembered and observed as, “Take Down the Goddamn Christmas Tree Day” or “National Christmas Gift Refund Day”.  Being as fair and balanced as I can possibly be I propose we name the 6th as “Take an Effing Liberal to Work Day”. We could show them off to our conservative friends and pass out a few food stamps as a surprise gifts.

The next time I have lunch with Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid I’ll make that suggestion.  They’ve been avoiding me since I refused that threesome offer over our last lunch.  They’re so sensitive when sexually rejected it may take a few months for another invite to come my way (no pun intended).

I can’t wait for next year, it’ll take me that long to choose my liberal work buddy. I have a complicated and fun selection process which will make as many liberals as possible as uncomfortable as possible.

So there!