Archive for the ‘Trivia’ Category
I scored a miserable nine on my first attempt. Not terribly good but not a total disaster either. As promised, here are the answers.
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Statler and Waldorf
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“I’ll be right back.”
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Kukla, Fran, and Ollie
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Roger Moore
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“Goodbye kids”, on the 2343rd-and-last episode of the popular kiddie show on September 30, 1960.
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123 1/2 Sesame Street
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Robert Klein
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4,531
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A policeman-it was a minor role. The sketch was part of a 1950 Cavalcade of Stars Show.
10. Yankee shortstop, Phil Rizzuto
11. The Munsters
12. “Love in Bloom”
13. Julie Kavnar-formerly the awkward sister on “Rhoda”.
14. The La Salle
15. Soap
16. Bruce Lee
17. A pig named Arnold.
18. Only one but the client was later proved innocent.
19. Chip, Mike, and Robbie. Mike moved away later and Ernie was adopted.
20. Trusty scout.
Bonus Question (Worth 2 Points): Victoria Principle’s The two feuded earlier, when Rivers was guest hosting on the Tonight Show.
I love supplying all of you with tons of useless trivia but today I think I’ll change things up a little. I’ll be asking the questions and hopefully some of you will supply the correct answers.
We’ve all been raised sitting in front of the television and I don’t see that lessening any time soon. With the addition of smartphones and tablets it should increase every year for the foreseeable future.
With that in mind I’m supply you with twenty trivia questions concerning television over the last fifty years. Let’s see just how well you can do with them. I’ll supply the answers tomorrow and you can see just how well or how badly you’ve done. Lets begin.
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What are the names of the two old codgers who wisecrack from their box seats on the Muppet Show?
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What was Johnny Carson’s famous reply when a reporter asked what he would his epithet to be?
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What 1949 television program was the very first coast-to-coast network show?
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Who played Beau Maverick on the TV western comedy series Maverick?
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What were the only words spoken by Clarabell the clown on the Howdy Doody Show?
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What was the address of Big Birds nest on TV’s Sesame Street?
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What popular stand-up comic turned down the role of Trapper John McIntyre in the TV sitcom M*A*S*H before Wayne Rogers signed on for the part?
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How many opening monologues did Johnny Carson deliver during his 30 years as host of the Tonight Show?
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What role did Art Carney play in Jackie Gleason’s very first Honeymooners sketch?
10. Who was the first mystery guest to appear on the TV quiz show What’s My Line in 1950?
11. What TV sitcom family lived at 1313 Mockingbird Lane?
12. What was the theme song Jack Benny played off-key on his violin?
13. What character actress provides the voice of mother Marge on TVs animated sitcom The Simpsons?
14. What car did TVs Archie Bunker recall fondly in “Those Were the Days”, the theme song of the sitcom All in the Family?
15. On what TV show did Robert Guillaume first portray the sharp-witted, sharp-tongued butler Benson?
16. Who played Kato, the faithful Philippine valet-chauffeur, on the TV show The Green Hornet?
17. Who portrayed Arnold Ziffel on Green Acres, the late 1960s TV sitcom that starred Eddie Albert and Eva Gabor?
18. How many cases did Perry Mason lose in the nine seasons Raymond Burr appeared on TV as the ace defensive lawyer?
19. What were the names of the three sons in the TV sitcom My Three Sons, which featured Fred Mc Murray as widower Steve Douglas?
20. What is the meaning of kemo sabe the words Tonto used to address the Lone Ranger?
Bonus Question (Worth 2 Points): What actress’s unpublished home telephone number did comedienne Joan Rivers give out on national TV in 1986 when she was hosting The Late Show Starring Joan Rivers?
So how do you think you did? I won’t tell you my score because it sucked. I thought I knew a lot but once again I may have been mistaken. The answers will follow tomorrow.
EVERY USELESS THING UNIVERSITY
Class is now in session, so please take your seats, pay close attention, and prepare to become a little smarter. Our lessons for today are as follows:
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Lesson #7 – Why Does Alcohol Cause People to Urinate?
The reason why people urinate so frequently while drinking alcohol is because it is a diuretic i.e., a drug that increases the amount of urine produced by the kidneys. Caffeine, too, is a diuretic.
Alcohols diuretic effect works by preventing the blood regulation function of vasopressin, and antidiuretic hormone that acts on the kidneys, compelling them to concentrate urine by increasing the resorption of water. Decrease in vasopressin therefore reduces the amount of water reabsorbed by the kidneys, resulting in the production of larger amounts of urine. This diuretic effect draws water from the body and causes a person to urinate more fluid than they imbibe.
The diuretic effect (or diuresis) is caused not by the volume of liquid drunk but by the alcohol content of the drink itself. A shot of spirits will generally cause a person to generate as much urine as they would if they drink a pint of beer.
Now you know the reason for the consistently long lines at restrooms during sporting events. The next time your at a party and you hear the phrase “I could piss like a race horse”, get out of the way and let that person pass. You certainly don’t want any back splash on your shoes.
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Lesson #8 – Why Does the Penis Shrink When It’s Cold?
In cold weather or water, a man’s penis will often retract and reduce considerably in size. This phenomenon sometimes referred to as “shrinkage”, and it occurs for a number of reasons, primarily that of temperature regulation. The testicles are contained in the scrotum and suspended away from the body, owing to the fact that sperm can be produced only when conditions are slightly cooler than the core temperature of the body. The temperature range in which sperm can be produced is very narrow, varying by only a couple of degrees, and when the environment gets too cold the scrotum retracts, drawing the testicles closer to the body to increase the temperature. As the penis is attached to the scrotum, this retraction pulls up the penis along with it.
A sufficient steep drop in temperature will also prompt the body to reduce the amount of blood circulating to the extremities and appendages, and concentrate blood flow in the core of the body in order to check the vital organs. As the size of the penis is affected greatly by the amount of blood that it receives, when a drop in temperature causes a reduction in the amount of blood reaches it, the penis shrivels and decreases in size.
Penis can also reduce in size when a man is startled or frighten, again because the body retracts the scrotum to the body for maximum protection, following the penis and with it.
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Now all of you ladies out there have the inside scoop. You should no longer take it personally if a man fails to respond to your many charms since he’s either cold, wet, startled or even frightened. If he is none of those things then you have a serious problem that can only be solved by kicking him to the curb and moving on.
CLASS DISMISSED
During my wanderings yesterday I stumbled on a new treasure trove of absolutely useless information expanded to include virtually every country on the planet. I felt just like a little kid in a candy store. These factoids and tidbits are much more interesting than some I’ve previously found and I’m happy to be sending them along to you. Where I can I’ll note the source of the material and if you dispute the information call them.
There is no rhyme or reason as to how they are listed so just wade on through and enjoy.
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At birth, most babies cry at C or C Sharp. – Financial Times
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Five people were killed by falling icicles in the central Russian town of Samara between February 23 and 25, 2008. – Reuters
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On a QWERTY keyboard, 32% of keystrokes take place on the middle row, 52% on the upper row, and 16% on the bottom row. – Discover Magazine
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In ninety days a single toad can consume nearly 10,000 insects. – State of the World
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Hitler was on the short list for the 1938 Nobel Peace Prize. – The Guardian
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Two thirds of the world’s people have never seen snow. – Canadian Weather Trivia Calendar
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The average British woman spends two years of her life gazing in the mirror. – The Times
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Every year, an average of twelve Japanese tourists in Paris have to be repatriated due to severe culture shock. – Foreign Policy Passport
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Henry David Thoreau once burned down three hundred acres of forest trying to cook a fish he had caught for supper. – The Times
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On an average day, about 3.3% of the worlds population has sex. Less than 0.4% of these acts result in births. – Financial Times
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Asians make up 35% of the undergraduate body at MIT but only 4% of the US population. – New York Book Review
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There are an estimated 10,000 trillion ants on earth – roughly 1.6 million for each human. Their combined weight is equivalent to that of the entire human population. – MSN
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Spammers typically need to send one million emails to get fifteen positive responses. – The New Yorker
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Jack Bauer, the lead character from the series 24, personally killed 112 people in the first five seasons of the show. – The Guardian
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About 85% of Chinese people share only a hundred surnames. Wang is the most popular (with 93 million people), followed by Li (92 million) and Zhang (88 million). At least 100,000 people are named “Wang Tao,” making it the most popular full name. – China Daily
There you have it. The first installment of International Trivia. It’s nice to see that we Americans are not alone when it comes to weirdness and odd behavior. Carry on.
I love lists of all kinds but I apparently haven’t listed some subjects that certain people have been waiting for. In response to a "tongue in cheek" request for odd or record setting information on sex I visited more web sites than usual to find a few interesting sexual facts. I can’t personally verify these tidbits but the majority have been reported through numerous sources and appear legitimate. Read on and and try hard not to laugh too much, shudder too much or retch too much.
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Most Children Fathered: The king of Morocco (in the 17th century), Moulay Ismail Ibn Sharif, is a proud owner of this sex record. He had a harem with 500 wives and 1042 recorded offspring’s.
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Oldest Father: Indian farmer, Nanu Ram Jogi already held the record for world’s oldest father when he fathered his 21st child at 90-years-old. Jogi is married to his fourth wife and has no plans of slowing down his baby production.
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Most Births: The modern world record for giving birth is held by Leontina Albina from San Antonio, Chile. Now in her mid-sixties, she claims to be the mother of 64 children. Of these, 55 are documented.
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The mother with the greatest number of kids that are not twins is Livia Ionce. This Romanian woman, 44, gave birth to her 18th child in Canada in 2008.
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The woman to give birth to the most children was a peasant’s wife from Shuya (east of Moscow) . She gave birth 27 times. 16 pairs of twins, seven sets of triplets and four sets of quadruplets.
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Most Ejaculations: For a man in one hour is 16.
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Semen Swallowed: Michelle Monahan swallowed 1.7 pints (almost 1 liter) of semen and had to get her stomach pumped.
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Most female orgasms in an hour: 134.
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Most male orgasms in an hour: 16.
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Longest Ejaculation: American man Horst Schultz was recorded ejaculating 18 feet 9 inches. He also holds the records for height (12 ft. 4in) and speed (42.7mph). A woman has been recorded ejaculating 10 feet.
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Strongest Vagina: 42 year-old Russian woman, Tatiata Kozhevnikova, broke her own record by hefting a glass ball attached to 31 pounds of weight with her vagina muscles. Kozhenikova’s success didn’t happen overnight, but through fifteen years of rigorously training.
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Oldest Prostitute: An 82 -year-old woman called "Grandma" in Tai Pei is believed to be the oldest living and working prostitute. She began 40 years ago after a man she had lived with for two decades died. She stays in business by charging ten to twenty times less than other working girls in the area.
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Largest Female Gangbang: Pornstar Lisa Sparxxx nailed 919 guys in 24 hours. This defeated previous records of 646 in 2002 and 759 in 2003.
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Largest Male Gangbang: Porn star Jon Dough had sex with over 55 women in one day, having 5 to 6 orgasms.
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Largest Orgy: In Japan 250 couples had sex at the same time and in the same place while camera crews recorded the event. Despite all testing negative for STDs, the couples only had sex with their partners.
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Youngest Parents: Shaun Steard of England was 12 when he became a father. 5-year-old, Peruvian Lina Medina gave birth in 1933 after starting to menstruate at 3. Her father was jailed on suspicion of incest but released due to a lack of evidence. The child was delivered through cesarean because Lina’s hips were too narrow.
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The smallest human penis: 0.39 inches.
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Largest Non-Human Penis: Rorqual whales have penises that average 10 feet, and as much as a 1 foot in diameter.
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Largest Human Penis: The record for the largest living penis belongs to Jonah Falcon who has a 13.5 inch penis.
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Largest Human Clitoris: In The Sexual Anatomy, W. Francis Benedict mentions a 12 inch clitoris.
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Largest Human Vagina: Scottish giant, Anna Swan, and her giant husband had a giant baby that’s head was 19 inches, all of which fit through her vagina.
I don’t know about you but that’s just about all the trivia and facts about sex I’ll ever need. It’s scary to think that most of what you just read is factual and many of these people are still alive, well, and active. This should take care of any future requests for odd sexual facts for a very long time.
Welcome back to the next installment of E.U.T. (Every Useless Thing) University’s on-line education program. It’s the best known reservoir for totally useless knowledge and through our detailed courses of study we will explain many of those things that have puzzled mankind for centuries. Here are lesson plans #5 and #6. These topics are not common knowledge but we at E.U.T.U have searched for and found the truth just for you.
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Lesson #5 – How Did the “Missionary Position” Get It’s Name?
The missionary position is a position for sexual intercourse in which the man and woman lie facing each other, with the man on top of the woman. It is probably the best-known sexual position has been adopted by people for centuries.
The name of the position is widely thought to be derived from the early European missionaries, who discovered that native people in the New World were employing other unorthodox positions, such as the man penetrating the woman from behind. The missionaries taught the natives that couples facing each other was the only position that was acceptable to God (because it was more intimate, enabling both partners to see and kiss each other) and that any other position was considered unnatural. It is generally thought that these teachings were carried out by St. Paul who believed that the woman should be underneath the man during intercourse, while St. Augustine also taught that any other position was a sin against nature.
The term was first recorded in its popular definition in the 1960’s.
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Isn’t it amazing that so many of our current issues concerning sex and procreation were caused by a handful of prudish and allegedly holy men who passed it down to the “free love generation”. That irony at it’s very best.
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Lesson #6 – What is the G Spot and Where is It?
The G spot is a small area in a woman’s vagina that, when stimulated, is said to give her intense orgasms. It’s named after its discoverer Ernest Grafenberg, a German physician who conducted research on that area of the vagina in the 1950’s. In recent years.
The G spot is said to be located on the upper front vaginal wall, close to where the urethra joins the bladder. While its exact position can vary, it is commonly situated 2 to 3 inches inside the vagina, directly behind the pubic bone. It is the size of a small coin and has a spongy texture, distinguishing it from the otherwise smooth vaginal wall. Many women have difficulty in finding it, and some cannot find it at all.
The G spot is usually very sensitive and is capable of hardening and swelling. When pressure is applied to it, it can stimulate the need to urinate, and it might be the organ responsible for female ejaculation. One theory for the existence of this phenomenon is that during childbirth the head of the child pushes on the G spot, triggering the ejaculation, which lubricates the birth canal and helps with the final phase of birth.
Many people still maintain that the G spot doesn’t exist, or that it doesn’t contribute to orgasms in women. Others, meanwhile, claimed that it is part of the clitoris, the nerves of which penetrate deep below the surface.
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For all you men out there you can no longer deny the G spot’s existence or that you can’t to find it. The teachers from E.U.T.U. have spent countless hours and endless searching to find that magical spot, to map its location, and to supply that information to you. So guys, get off your ass and get out there and find that most important of female erogenous zones and don’t stop until you’ve been successful or you die trying.
These lessons will continue into many interesting areas that we at E.U.T.U. have been diligently researching. They will be published as soon as possible after being received in order to keep you up to speed. Your very welcome!
CLASS DISMISSED
Since this week has been so traumatic and disturbing I’ve decided to lay some more really useless information on you. I’m just not up to writing anything too serious today because I’m still a little unfocused with everything that’s been going on. These facts are somewhat odd but still interesting and I hope you enjoy them.
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Cats urine glows under a black light.
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Blueberry jelly beans were especially made for Ronald Reagan.
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In every episode of Seinfeld there’s a superman somewhere.
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Checkmate comes from the Persian phrase "shah mat" which means the king is dead.
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Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds while dogs have only ten.
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91% of Americans lie daily.
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When you sneeze water can come out of your mouth at speeds of 60mph.
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Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.
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On a Canadian 2 dollar bill the flag flying over the parliament building appears to be an American flag. It’s actually Canada’s earlier flag of the Red Ensign.
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Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.
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There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.
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Almonds are a member of the peach family.
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A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.
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Sloths are actually fast, they just prefer to move at a slow pace.
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There are only two families who produced a father and son who were US presidents: Bush and Adams.
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A pig’s orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.
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Humans and horses are the only two animals that have hymens.
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Polish is the only word in the English language that has two completely different meanings when the first letter is capitalized.
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The longest word in the English language is Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis.
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Margaret Kerry was the live action model for Walt Disney’s Tinkerbell.
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The average human lies at least twice a day.
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Before Late Night Television, Jay Leno appeared in an episode of Laverne and Shirley.
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In "American Graffiti", the license plate on Richard Dreyfusses’ car is changed every time you see it.
That should just about do it for today. I’m on my way to begin the search for another vehicle for the better-half. She’s still in morning for the loss of her little yellow car and the only way to help her along is to find another car as soon as possible. I’m actually surprised she didn’t want to bring the remains home so we could bury it in the yard next to our previous pets. She gets attached to the weirdest crap. It can be amazing, unbelievable, and disturbing all at the same time.
Here’s my second installment of Beer Trivia that I faithfully promised my better-half I would post in order to get my butt out of the dog house. I’m hoping this will be sufficient to put me back into her good graces. I know, I’m so whipped I can hardly stand it. I feel my manhood slowly slipping away until nothing will be left but a screaming little girl with five o’clock shadow.
I hope all of you beer lovers out there find these tidbits interesting. I may never understand it because I’m really not a beer lover. I’m not even a beer liker. Here, goes.
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In the past English pub crawlers had a whistle baked into the rim of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.
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In the Czech Republic, beer is cheaper than Coke. A half liter at a local pub costs just 30 cents while a half liter of Coke costs 85 cents. Beer is a little more expensive than club soda (which costs 29 cents, for a half liter).
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A labeorphilist is a collector of beer bottles.
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A tegestologist is a collector of beer mats.
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A flood of beer swept through the streets of St. Giles, England, on 17 October 1814. Caused by a rupture in a brewery tank containing 3500 barrels of beer, the tidal wave killed nine people and demolished two houses.
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The first six-pack of beer was produced by the Pabst Brewery in the 1940s. The brewery conducted numerous studies, which found six cans were the ideal weight for the average housewife to carry home from the store.
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In eleventh-century England, a bride would distribute ale to her wedding guests in exchange for donations to the newlyweds. This brew, known as Bride Ale, is the origin of the word ‘bridal’.
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One method of checking a beer’s quality is the way in which the foam adheres to the side of the glass after each sip. Beer connoisseurs call this “Brussels lace.”
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1888: Citizens of Munich took to the streets and rioted after a beer price increase was announced.
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Czechs drink the most beer in the world per capita – an average of 160 liters a year per person.
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In old England, inns paid a government tax known as a ‘scot’ for serving beer. Beer lovers who left town to drink at rural pubs were said to be drinking ‘scot free’.
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Beer recipes have been found on Babylonian clay tablets from over 6000 years ago.
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Guinness sells an average of 7 million glasses a day worldwide.
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The British Army supplied its men with a cash allowance for beer, considered a vital nutritional staple on long overseas missions. With this allowance of one penny, soldiers enjoyed six pints of ale every day.
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In ancient Egypt, two containers of beer were the minimum wage for a day’s labour.
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A barrel contains 31 gallons of beer. What Americans commonly refer to as a keg is actually 15.5 gallons, or a half-barrel.
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A 12 oz. of a typical American pale lager actually has fewer calories than 2 percent milk or apple juice.
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The world’s strongest beer is ‘Samuel Adams’ Triple Bock, which has reached 17% alcohol by volume. To obtain this level, however, they had to use a champagne yeast.
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The ’33’ on a bottle of Rolling Rock was originally a printer’s error. It refers to the 33 words in the original slogan. It has generated enough mystery over the years that the company left it in the label.
That finishes my penance for writing a lengthy posting on female breasts. I’m not saying this kind of circumstance won’t happen again but I promise to do do my best to behave. I haven’t had much success with that since about the age of three but I’ll continue to try.
I hesitate to write about today’s subject because I know many of my female readers will take me to task. As Groucho Marx used to say on You Bet Your Life, "Today’s topic is foreplay. Say the secret word and win a hundred dollars".
The term foreplay gets tossed around all to often when men have their discussions about being successful lovers. It comes across as more of a joke topic than anything they should take too seriously. Most women are out-spoken in their demands that men become more accomplished in this most important area. I can’t argue that fact because over the years I’ve found it to be true.
I think many men are good at foreplay but even they are accused at times of being unskilled. It’s become an easy way for women to keep a man on the defensive and to force him into working even harder than usual. It’s those passive-aggressive remarks like “Oh, that was nice but my old boyfriend wasn’t good at that either”, that can really kill the mood. I’m not being too critical of them because it’s just human nature to try and reap the most benefits from every situation. I’ve known a few women who considered successful foreplay by a man to be when he removed his pants. As with all human beings, everyone is different in their approach to just about anything.
I once had a fairly successful interlude with a young woman who told me up front there would be no actual intercourse. She was of the Bill Clinton school of sexual definition in that oral sex was not really sex. We never had actual intercourse but OMG it really didn’t matter, that girl had some serious skills. It was one of the few times in my life where I was totally satisfied with a developing relationship and was really disappointed when her flight was called and she flew away. I guess that’s why to this day I love airports and flight attendants but hate flying. Ahhhh good memories.
I was watching a TV show a while back and heard the term "King of Foreplay" used during a conversation about relationships. I’m certainly not claiming that title but I’ve studied as hard as I could over the years and I’m close to reaching that goal. If I could live at least seventy-five more years I might just make it. There are no hard and fast rules on foreplay because what works for one women doesn’t work for the next. It can be very difficult and time consuming for the inexperienced man to figure these things out.
After cruising around the net I found this list of foreplay tips on how to be a better lover. I’ll make a short comment on each since I’ve probably tried them all at one time or another. As with everything, some worked and some didn’t. See what you think. For you inexperienced young guys out there pay attention and learn from your elders.
Masturbate for your partner – Didn’t Work
Masturbate each other – Worked
Masturbate your partner – Worked
Suck nipples – Worked
Role-Play – Didn’t Work
Whole body massage – Worked
Give a lap dance or strip tease – Never as Foreplay
Shower together – Never as Foreplay
Tie one of you up – Really Worked
Oral Sex – Really Worked
Tickle – Never Tried
Nibble earlobes – Worked
Spank playfully – Really Worked
Talk dirty to each other – Worked
Blindfold one of you – Really Worked
Used sex toys – Really Worked
Shave each other’s private areas – Worked
Suck fingertips – Worked
Watch a porno – Never as Foreplay
Play an Adult Sex Game – Never Tried
Drip hot wax on your lover – Really worked
Body paint each other – Never as Foreplay
Hopefully the woman your trying to seduce doesn’t require any more than two or three of them. My advice is to become proficient in them all and begin your life-long search for that "King of Foreplay" title.
We all know who Dr. Ruth is I think. She’s the four and a half foot tall sex expert who has the answers to every sex question. Here are a few tips from her for those men who are having difficulties.
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Check it out. If anything "down there" hurts or isn’t working the way you think it should, don’t wonder about it — see a doctor. For him, difficulty maintaining an erection and, for her, pain during intercourse always requires a medical evaluation.
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Don’t zone out. Many couples are embarrassed to ask their partner to stimulate erogenous zones that are very pleasurable but can be considered taboo. The nipples, the anus, the back of the neck — all have nerve endings. So don’t be shy. The only shame when it comes to foreplay is a missed opportunity for pleasure.
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Stay the course. There is a moment before orgasm when many women give up, thinking nothing will happen. It’s a self-sabotaging mistake. Stay with the stimulation and the orgasm will come.
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There is not an exact science to foreplay. You and your partner(s) should understand what you need and want from each other. While we speak about foreplay techniques we must regard before anything else that every human being is distinctive and diverse from each person else and the above-mentioned foreplay techniques have a different impact from one person to another. Accustom yourself to the occasion.
Isn’t Dr. Ruth just terrific. I’ve always wondered if growing up at “zipper height” caused her to pursue sex as her life’s work. Just a thought.
Research indicates more than 85% of ladies reached more intense orgasms when their partners spent more than 10 minutes on foreplay. So boys, increase your number of foreplay techniques and become more sexually adventurous. It’s worth every second for you to bone up (pun intended) on your skills. They’ll serve you well for many decades to come (again pun intended).
I think I’m in the proverbial dog house after yesterdays posting on female breasts. My better-half was not too pleased with that posting so I’ve got to be punished. It’s something that happens between us every time I step out of line which occurs more often than I care to admit.
I’ve been thinking of possible ways to calm the waters but my choices are somewhat limited. I finally realized that the thing she loves most in this world (after me I hope) is beer. What could I possibly write about beer to make her happy. Besides giving her a case of cold beer wrapped in a ribbon I actually considered having a tap installed on the kitchen sink. Hot water, cold water, and beer at the ready for quick access. I decided that was a little more than she actually deserved after putting me on the defensive like this.
My solution is the beer trivia collection that follows. I found so many interesting beer facts that this will be Beer List #1. I’ll follow with the second half of the list in a week or so. Hopefully this will end the cold shoulder treatment and get me back into her good graces. We shall see.
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According to The Code of Hammurabi of ancient Babylonia (c. 1750 B.C.) a merchant could be put to death for diluting beer.
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1810: Munich establishes Oktoberfest as an official celebration.
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A beer lover or enthusiast is called a cerevisaphile.
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After consuming buckets of aul (or ale), the Vikings would head fearlessly into battle, often without armor or even shirts. In fact, "berserk" means "bare shirt" in Norse, and eventually took on the meaning of their wild battles.
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Historians report that during the Middle Ages, when monks were brewing their beer in their monasteries, each monk was allowed to drink 5 quarts of beer a day.
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A beer a day… Beer was used to treat over 100 illnesses in Egypt, 1600 BC.
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In the 13th century, King Wenceslas convinced the Pope to revoke an order banning the brewing of beer in Czech territories (no wonder he was known as ‘Good King Wenceslas).
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In 1116 BC, Chinese imperial edict stated that heaven required people to drink beer.
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In English pubs, unruly customers were told to mind their own pints and quarts and settle down – and so began the phrase "mind your P’s and Q’s.
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Before thermometers were invented, brewers would dip a thumb into the mix to find the right temperature for adding yeast. Too cold and the yeast wouldn’t grow; too hot and the yeast would die. This ancient practice is where we get the phrase ‘rule of thumb’.
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Cenosillicaphobia is the fear of an empty glass.
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In a Czech beer house, the bartender will refill your glass every time you empty it until you place your coaster on top of your glass, signaling that you have had enough.
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The first brewery in America was built in Hoboken, New Jersey in 1642.
Germany serves beer ice cream in popsicle form. Its alcoholic content is less than that found in "classic" beer.
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Saint Arnold, a bishop born in 580, is considered the patron saint of beer. He encouraged people to drink beer instead of water during the Plague.
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Anheuser-Busch is the largest brewery in the US.
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If you collect beer bottles you’re a labeorphilist.
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The most expensive beer in the world? It’s called “Tutankhamen” and is prepared according to the recipe recovered by a group of University of Cambridge archaeologists in Queen Nefertiti’s Temple of the Sun in Egypt. It costs US $52 a bottle, and is produced in limited and numbered edition.
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The pilgrims landed at Plymouth Rock because they ran out of beer. Although they planned to continue down the east coast, the Mayflower’s log explains the passengers "were hasted ashore and made to drink water that the seamen might have the more beer".
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The music for "The Star Spangled Banner" was derived from a British drinking song called "Anacreon".
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Assyrian tablets from 2000 BC stated that Noah was carrying beer aboard the ark.
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The United States two-dollar bill features three brewers: George Washington, Thomas Jefferson and Samuel Adams. In fact, George Washington installed a brew house on his grounds at Mount Vernon.
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The longest bar in the world is the 684 foot long New Bulldog in Rock Island, IL.
There you are my darling. A partial list of beer related facts and lore that should stop this madness. Please welcome me back into the fold with a big wet sloppy kiss and a huge hug. I promise to try harder to be the boring and uninteresting person you’re looking for. How’s that for a half-assed apology.
On top of everything else, I really hate beer.