Archive for the ‘History’ Category

03/16/2022 “Wisdom of the Ages”   Leave a comment

I’ve been on a kick of late concerning presidents, being presidential, and making timely and effective decisions. It’s easy for me to sit here in my home and criticize because I’ve never been in a position with that amount of power and the ability to use at will. It doesn’t change the fact that I think Biden is totally useless as a president, and he may even be the nicest guy in the world, but he is not presidential. So rather than criticize Biden and his ilk today I’m going to list a number of statements made by former presidents about the job, the responsibilities, and the difficulties. It certainly cleared my head on some misconceptions after reading them and I hope it will do the same for you.

JOHN QUINCY ADAMS

“I can tell you this: no man who ever held the office of President would congratulate a friend on obtaining it. Make no mistake about it, the four most miserable years of my life where my four years in the Presidency.”

DWIGHT DAVID EISENHOWER

“Oh, That lovely title, ex-President.

ANDREW JACKSON

“I can say with truth mine is a situation of dignified slavery.

LYNDON B. JOHNSON

“The Presidency has made every man who occupied it, no matter how small, bigger than he was; and no matter how big, not big enough for its demands.”

JOHN F. KENNEDY

“A President certainly must have . . . character, judgment, vigor, intellectual curiosity, a sense of history, and a strong sense of the future.”

RICHARD M. NIXON

“When the President does it, that means that it’s not illegal.

FRANKLIN D. ROOSEVELT

“One thing is sure. We have to do something. We have to do the best we know how at the moment . . . If it doesn’t turn out right, we can modify it as we go along.”

HARRY S. TRUMAN

“Always, if you ever pray, pray for me now. I don’t know if you fellas ever had a load of hay fall on you, but when they told me yesterday what happened, I felt like the moon, the stars and all the planets had fallen on me. I got the most terrible job a man ever had.”

ANYONE OUT THERE CRAZY ENOUGH TO APPLY FOR THAT JOB?

03/15/2022 Where’s Biden?   Leave a comment

I’ve stated on many occasions that I was done writing about politics and politicians. I’m afraid after watching the Biden administration in recent weeks I can’t remain quiet any longer or I will lose my effing mind.

As we all know the Ides of March can be a dangerous time as can be verified by Julius Caesar. In celebrating that infamous day today, I thought a short discussion on Presidents was in order. With Russia and the Ukraine battling it out and Biden and his socialist vice-president doing absolutely nothing. It made me wonder where Biden will be listed as compared to past presidents. We’ve had some dunces, some fools, and a large number of incompetents. Many American lives have been sacrificed when presidential decisions went sideways. The following information was recently commissioned by C-SPAN to answer that question definitively and the results are fascinating. They ranked each president according to a number of different factors such as public persuasion, crisis leadership, international relations, and vision while in office. Here are their top ten.

Abraham Lincoln

George Washington

Franklin Delano Roosevelt

Teddy Roosevelt

Dwight David Eisenhower

Harry S. Truman

Thomas Jefferson

John F. Kennedy

Ronald Reagan

Lyndon B. Johnson

Obviously, I don’t see the name Trump, Obama, Bush, or Carter listed in the top ten. After observing Biden since he took office, I would rank him around #40. He’s had a number of opportunities to make life a bit more difficult for the Russians but hasn’t done it. Either he’s an old fool or his advisors are incompetent. It seems their more concerned with party politics than international affairs. Maybe if gas reaches $6.00 a gallon someone will begin paying attention. This situation is getting out of hand and could turn dangerous at any time. Keep sitting on your hands Joe.

VOTE DEMOCRATIC AND KISS PUTIN’S ASS

03/14/2022 “Epithets”   2 comments

For many years after moving to New England, I spent a great deal of time in dozens of local cemeteries in southern Maine, checking out epithets, and anything else interesting that I could find. There was a time when I would stretch T-shirts over old tombstones and do rubbings of family names and places which I then sold in a local gift shop. Business became so brisk I was able to take requests from certain families to memorialize their long dead relatives. It was a little weird at times but very interesting. I also got to meet a few of the local law enforcement officers who repeatedly stopped to check me out. The epithets were remarkable since most of the early deaths were colonists from England, the home of the limerick. What follows are not the ones I discovered back then but discoveries made by other morbid folks who were also fascinated by them. Here are a few priceless ones I think you might enjoy.

Sacred to the memory of Anthony Drake,

Who died for peace and quietness’ sake.

His wife was constantly scolding and scoffin’,

So, he sought for repose in a twelve-dollar coffin.

Burlington Massachusetts

🎇🎇🎇

Here lies Ann Mann;

She lived an old maid and

She died an old Mann.

Bath Abbey, England

🎇🎇🎇

Sacred to the memory of

Elisha Philbrook and his wife Sarah

Beneath these stones do lie,

Back-to-back, my wife and I!

When the last trumpet the air shall fill,

If she gets up, I’ll just lie still.

Sargentville, Maine

🎇🎇🎇

Sacred to the memory of

Jared Bates

who died August 6, 1800.

His widow, age 24, lives at 7 Elm

Street, has every qualification for a

good wife and yearns to be comforted.

Lincoln, Maine

🎇🎇🎇

THINK UP A GOOD ONE FOR YOURSELF

AND LEAVE IT WITH A FRIEND

☘Limerick Alert☘   2 comments

For those of you limerick lovers, I thought I’d give you a small selection from a category called “Oral Irregularities”. No further explanation is necessary, just enjoy them.

In his youth our old friend Boccaccio

Was having a girl in a patio.

When it came to the twat

She wasn’t so hot,

But, boy, was she good at fellatio!

😝😝😝

A fellatrix’s healthful condition

Proved the value of spunk as nutrition.

Her remarkable diet

(I suggest that you try it)

Was only her clients’ emission

😜😜😜

There was an old man of Decatur,

Took out his red-hot pertater.

He tried at her dent

But when his thing bent,

He got down on his knees and he et’r.

😱😱😱

The priests at the Temple of Isis

Used to offer up amber and spices

Then back of the shrine

They would play 69

And other unmentionable vices.

🤪🤪🤪

There lived in French Louisiana

A quaint and deceived duenna

Who naïvely thought

That a penis was wrought

To be et like a thick ripe banana.

MORE TO COME SOON

03/11/2022 Celebrity Deaths   Leave a comment

Normally, I find that posts concerning anything remotely related to sex seem to catch everyone’s eye. I’ve found one other subject that draws as much attention (almost) and that’s death. Here are a few obscure facts on celebrities during their final days and hours. It’s a bit morbid but informative.

  • Errol Flynn (1909 – 1959) was buried at Forest lawn Memorial Park Cemetery in Glendale, California, with a half-dozen friends, six bottles of whiskey, and farewell gifts from his boozing buddies.
  • It happened one night, the death of Oscar-winning legend Claudette Colbert (1903 – 1996), after she suffered a series of strokes. But when she was alive, the actor made a promise: “I must never think about death. People who think about death are mentally sick.”
  • John Belushi (1949 – 1982) His final resting place is at Abel’s Hill Cemetery, Martha’s Vineyard but Belushi ain’t where you think he is. The huge boulder marked BELUSHI is just a deterrent, a place where fans can leave their liquor bottles, cigarette packs and other sundry “souvenirs”. His real grave lies several yards from the boulder, and nobody’s telling exactly where that may be.

Trivia Footnote: The three longest obituaries to run in the New York Times were, Pope John Paul II at 13870 words, Richard Nixon at 13155 words, and Ronald Reagan at 11,411.

  • Humphrey Bogart (1899 – 1957) His last words were to his wife Lauren Bacall as she left his bedside to run a quick errand, “Hurry back”. He was buried with a small gold whistle that he had given to Bacall before they were married. It referred to their first movie together and was inscribed with “If you want anything, just whistle.”
  • Joan Crawford (1905 – 1977) She died in her New York apartment from a heart attack and was also suffering from breast and pancreatic cancer. Her last words were directed to her housekeeper that had begun to pray out loud. She emphatically stated “Damn it! Don’t you dare ask God to help me!”

I certainly hope that when my time comes, I’ll have something a little more interesting to say. Maybe I’ll make a crib sheet to keep in my pocket with three or four really interesting comments and just before I go, I’ll choose the one I like the best. I don’t need a cutesy epithet either because hopefully my ashes will be floating somewhere in the Atlantic Ocean.

OH, TO BE A CELEBRITY

03/10/2022 “Good Old Albert”   Leave a comment

“The gift of fantasy has meant more to me than my

talent for absorbing positive knowledge.”

Albert Einstein 1985

03/09/2022 “Artists?”   Leave a comment

Carl Gustav Jung

“The unborn work in the psyche of the artist is a force of nature that achieves its end either with tyrannical might or with the subtle cunning of nature herself, quite regardless of the personal fate of the man who is its vehicle.”

Carl Gustav Jung (26 July 1875 – 6 June 1961) was a Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst who founded analytical psychology. During that time, he came to the attention of Sigmund Freud, the founder of psychoanalysis. Jung was also an artist, craftsman, builder and a prolific writer. Many of his works were not published until after his death and some are still awaiting publication.

ART IS THE SEX OF THE IMAGINATION

03/08/2022 “Oddities”   Leave a comment

I am a constant collector of weird and unusual facts and information. During my travels if I see something that even looks a little bit interesting, I collected it. I have many books in my archives that I’ve not read as thoroughly as I’d like and information your see here is from one of those books. Hope you enjoy it.

  • As the great Chicago fire of 1871 killed 300 people, an even deadlier fire was under way 200 miles to the north. It devastated Peshtigo, Wisconsin, killing 600 people; but somehow it never got the same attention.
  • All of Reykjavík, the capital of Iceland, is heated by underground hot springs. Reykjavík is probably the cleanest capital city in the world.
  • The first hydrogen bomb, tested in 1952, was as powerful as the total of all the bombs dropped on Germany and Japan during World War II, including both of the atomic bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
  • The African climate is not always warm. The Nile River has frozen over at least twice, in 829 A.D. and in 1010.
  • For amusement, it was agreed by four friends holidaying in Switzerland that each would write a ghost story. Percy B Shelley, George Byron, and Dr. John William Polidori never finished theirs. Only 18-year-old Mary Wollstonecraft Godwin did. She published it anonymously two years later, in 1818, with a preface by her husband, Shelley. Mary Shelley’s novel about Dr. Victor Frankenstein and his monstrous creation became a classic.
  • Sir Edmund Hillary and Tenzing Norkay deservedly received much praise when they were the first to climb to the summit of Mount Everest. Less known is the fact that they had a roster of 12 climbers, 40 Sherpa guides, and 700 porters.
  • Three pairs of common English rabbits were let loose in Australia, in the middle of the 19th century. Within a decade, the six rabbits had multiplied into millions, menacing the country’s agriculture.
  • Japan did not send an ambassador to another nation until it sent Niimi Masaoki to the US for a few weeks in 1860.
  • The daughters of a mother who is colorblind and a father who has normal vision will have normal vision. The sons will be colorblind, however.
  • Up to 150 tons of meteorite fragments slammed into the Earth each year. As far as is known, only seven people have been struck by such rocks from space.
  • By “deciphering” the Book of Revelations, a minister in Lochau in East Germany proclaimed that the world would end on October 18, 1533. When it didn’t happen, the minister, Michael Stiftel, was given a thorough thrashing by the townspeople.

I certainly hope you enjoy reading these obscure facts. It’s almost as much fun as actually collecting them. More are certain to follow because I barely scratched the surface of books I haven’t thoroughly read yet.

WHEN IN DOUBT, READ A BOOK

03/04/2022 Cliche’s   Leave a comment

The English language has flourished over the centuries and new words and expressions have creeped into the lexicon all the time. I’ve been fortunate, I think, to have traveled across the United States many times during my career. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard the sayings or clichés that were the same but had totally different meanings depending on the area of the country. I’m going to give you a few examples today that you’ve likely heard many times in your life but never knew the origins of them. I found some of this information really interesting, I hope you did too.

ANOTHER NAIL IN THE COFFIN”

This depressing phrase is applied to a development that makes the situation progressively worse. The “final nail” can also be compared with the “last straw”, but the meaning remains the same. This saying was originally adopted by smokers as early as the 1920s. They referred to cigarettes as “coffin nails” and this expression became the stock response when someone accepted yet another cigarette. At the time they were referring to the hazards of a smoker’s cough; the links between smoking, cancer and heart disease were only recognized later (when cigarettes earned another wonderful nickname, “cancer sticks”).

ANTS IN ONE’S PANTS

This cliché is said to describe an excessively restless or over-eager person. The US Army General, Hugh S. Johnson, was in charge of the National Recovery Administration (NRA) In 1933 for FDR. He said of the NRA general counsel, Donald Richburg: “Donald’s agitation is just a symptom of the ants of conscience in his pants.”

THE BOTTOM LINE

It is the main point of an argument, the basic characteristic of something, the actual value of a financial deal, or the truth of the matter. The phrase itself was originally an accounting term and referred to the figure at the end of a financial statement, indicating the net profit or loss of the company. The term gained wide usage during the 1970s, possibly because of its frequent use by Secretary of State, Henry Kissinger. He often spoke of “the bottom line” as the eventual outcome of a negotiation – ignoring the distraction of any incidental details.

MORE OF THESE COMING SOON

03/03/2022 🚚Stupid Bumper Sticker Alert🚛   Leave a comment

After receiving a few requests, it’s time for more retro bumper stickers. I’ve actually found a number of them that I’m in the process of having reprinted for my own use. I could be convinced to stick them on a few cars whose drivers have aggravated me. I’m also working on one for people who park inappropriately, to stick on their windshields. I’m a baaaad man.

IF YOU’RE RICH, I’M SINGLE

I CAME, I SAW, I SHOPPED

WELCOME TO CALIFORNIA; NOW GO HOME

TRUST ME. I’M A LAWYER

MY OTHER CAR IS A BROOM

GO AHEAD, HIT ME. I’M NOT INSURED

NO NUKES IS GOOD NUKES

JUST SAY NO TO INNUENDO

I CAN’T DRIVE 55

HELP BEAUTIFY AMERICA, GET A HAIR CUT

MAKE POLAND OUR 51ST STATE

THE WEATHER IS HERE. WISH YOU WERE BEAUTIFUL

TV EVANGELISTS DO MORE THAN LAY PEOPLE

HUGS ARE BETTER THAN DRUGS

NEVER PLAY LEAP FROG WITH A UNICORN

And Here’s My Favorite:

REALLY NICE GUYS FINISH LAST. I FINISH FIRST