Archive for the ‘spring’ Tag
In my last posting I was whining a little about not having much beach time here in good old tropical Maine. Being the bonehead I am and living with my boneheaded better-half we decided not to wait any longer to hit the beach. The snow had just melted and we were ready.
After a visit to one of our favorite watering-holes and after toasting a few glasses of cheer we made a bee line for the nearest beach. You need to understand that the temperature was in the forties with a twenty mile an hour wind making it feel like twenty degrees. Alcohol can do a lot of things but it doesn’t help a person stay warm and toasty on a windy beach in Maine in April. I was freezing my ass off almost immediately after leaving the car but the better-half was off to the races running around the beach like a German Shepard chasing a stick. We both were snapping pictures the entire time but that ended rather quickly.
It was then I spotted a herd of totally insane people running free and unfettered among us normal and sane folk. The waves were roaring in and these fools in their wonderfully uncool wet suits were trying to surf in water that was only just above freezing.. Surfing in Maine in April is like running naked through a nudist colony in February. It’s just nuts. I watched them for a while but was forced to return to my car so I could once again feel my fingers.
“Out of His Ever Loving Mind”
The better-half finally returned of her own volition all excited and happy about the entire evening. She coerced me into driving another few miles up the coast to our favorite beach. It hadn’t gotten any warmer and I argued loudly about getting out of the car at all. As usual she strong-armed me out of the car and down to the water. There we were once again watching another insane human being wind surfing like he was in Key West and it was August. Here are a couple of shots I took of that young idiot. I’ve been known to don a wet suit to frolic in semi-warm water occasionally but no matter what people tell you . . . . it’s still freaking cold with that suit on.
“Just Nuts”
We made our way home, turned up the heat, and discussed what mental illness could be responsible for such bizarre behavior, both ours and the surfers. We never figured it out but we really didn’t care anyway. We snuggled into our bed under our wonderfully warm and overused electric blanket that’s become the best thing about these Maine winters.
Our best friend has finally arrived to spend the winter with us. It’s about this time every year that this friend arrives and is welcomed with open arms by us both. This friend is warm and loving like no one else and my better-half and I are looking forward to sharing our bed for the next few months with this visiting friend.
Now that you’ve all read that last paragraph and had a few of those off-color thoughts I know you were having let me explain further. Our best friend is a soft, fuzzy, green, and electrified blanket. With Fall in the air and Winter on the way this friend makes living bearable while the seasons change. To keep our house heated is the biggest expense of the year other than the mortgage. Every degree we can lower the level of heat in the house is money in our pocket. We haven’t even turned on the heat yet and I suspect we won’t until sometime in mid October. By delaying that long we’ll save approximately $350.00. We’re willing to wear more clothing for a few weeks during the day and to turn up the electric blanket a bit at night each night to accomplish that.
I’ve never had the luxury of living in an area of the country that has mild temperatures for most of the year. While I really love the season change and the cold and snow I occasionally envy people living in those areas. Living here is like having to lead two lives. Hot weather, time on the beach, and tourists over running the area. Shorts, T-shirts, flip flops, and sun tan and sun burn. Within a few weeks that all disappears and out come the parka’s, gloves, wool socks, and skyrocketing heating costs. We’re used to it but I feel bad for any of those southerners who may relocate here. It would be a huge shock to their systems and their wallets.
We can hope for a few more weeks of Indian Summer but that doesn’t always occur as planned. By this time next month all of us Mainer’s will have made the mental transition from Summer to Winter and will be prepared to move on down the road as usual. The next six months will be all about, snow, sleet, wind, crushed mail boxes, car accidents, and a general malaise caused by being house bound. For some of the more hardy folks it will be all about plowing snow, ice fishing, hunting, and snowmobiling. The kids as always will be throwing snowballs, building forts, snowmen, and praying for a heavy snow fall that will cancel school. Some things just never change.
After six months of Winter we’ll make the transition back to Spring and Summer with a real appreciation that most southern folks don’t have. The memory of every minute that I spend sitting in the sun on my deck and every time I walked the beach in my swim suit this summer will carry me through the winter. It’s all a big mind game that I play with myself. When I’m out in the driveway using the snow blower and dressed liked a freaking Eskimo I’m actually thinking about that warm beach and those pretty young things in their skimpy bikinis.
Don’t tell my better-half my little secret or there’ll be hell to pay for sure.
Is it just me or does this Spring not impress. It was perfect if you like lots of rain, cool nights, and sweltering heat. I’m not really sure what I was hoping for or expecting but for some reason I feel disappointed. Coming out of our long winter here in Maine should have made just about anything acceptable but it didn’t seem to work for me this year. I have to say I feel a little let down.
Now that Summer has officially arrived what can we hope for? More sunshine would be nice, maybe some cooler weather, less humidity, and just enough rain to keep the yards and gardens healthy. That would be the ideal Summer but as we’ve come to realize of late, we almost never get what we expect weather-wise.
Why is it that we humans are never satisfied. All winter we moan and complain about the lack of sunshine and warmth. We bitch about the snow, the sleet, the freezing rain, and slush that seems to cover everything. It drives us totally crazy to be cooped up in the house getting on each others nerves for months on end. Then all of a sudden the weather changes and what happens. We haven’t even had enough time to put away our winter clothes before we’re already bitching about how hot it is. We continue that silliness into late October when things start to cool down in preparation for Winter. We can’t wait for some cooler temperatures to save us from the terrible heat. We have one snow fall and within hours we’re whining about the cold and wishing for Spring and Summer. It’s a conundrum I tell you.
I can only deduce that we as a species are really screwed up. We never appear completely happy or satisfied with anything, That would help explain a divorce percentage just over fifty percent. Maybe not, what the hell do I know. What I do know is that I’m just as bad as everyone else when it comes to these things and I see no hope of finding a workable solution. Am I a little depressed, why yes I think I am. Do I need a little help? Why yes I think I do. Let me think . . . . . . . . . .
Maybe I need a walk on the beach and a quick dip in the cool ocean water to wake me out of these Summer doldrums. A few dozen scantily clad bikini wearing young ladies might be just the thing to begin my healing. I can walk down the beach and have a few drinks at the Surf Side, enjoy their air conditioning for a hour or so, and then return to my blanket to relax and maybe read a few chapters of my favorite book. Another dip into the ocean and a few dozen more buxom young things prancing down the beach are beginning to make me feel a whole lot better. Who cares about the heat? Not me. I’m beginning to feel rather good.
Okay, just forget everything I said in those first few paragraphs because I was in the throws of depression and was totally wrong. I’ve suddenly rediscovered a few things that can snap me right back to normal almost immediately. Chant this along with me!
Give me a "T", drive me an "H", give me an "O", give me an "N", and a big freaking "G". C’mon Summer!
Today was all about relaxing. My better-half and I decided to just take the day, go where we please, relax a little, and we did just that. We had a great breakfast at home and then headed for the coast to snap some pictures. As expected traffic was heavier than usual with the influx of tourist beginning to increase. The summer season is almost upon us.
Our first stop was the Portland Head Light which is a light house on a point of land at the entry to Portland harbor. This is a favorite spot for tourists from all over the country if the license plates we saw today were any indication. My luck much be changing because just as we drove past the main entrance someone pulled out and left me the best damn parking spot you can get. We took plenty of pictures, spent some time in the gift shop, and then near the water watching the boats come and go. It’s a very relaxing place and the adjacent park was filled with kids and parents flying kits, throwing Frisbees, and playing ball. It was very nice.
We then left the park and drove through the suburbs of Portland and headed northwest out of the city. We drove at least a hundred miles in a large circle covering a large portion of southern Maine. We stopped to shop in a number of antique shops because I was hot to buy something today. Unfortunately for me my better-half was not. We saw many really cool things but ended up buying nothing at all. I found a working Dictaphone circa 1865 with a number of wax cylinders still intact and workable. It was in beautiful condition and I had a hard time walking away from it. For $150.00 it could have been all mine. It still may be mine. My better-half returns to wok tomorrow which may force me drive back to that shop and make the purchase anyway. Should I or shouldn’t I? I’ll know tomorrow when I get out of bed.
We had a great day together and it gave us a chance to reconnect after a few weeks of her hectic work schedule. We antiqued a little and then stopped along the road to see some lambs and take their pictures. I also got some great shots of my better-half chasing a flock of turkeys through a farmers field trying to snap pictures while running. It was really funny and I’ve got it all on my camera to be used later to embarrass her. Life is good.
We returned home tired but relaxed. She’s back to work tomorrow where the stress will start working on her all over again. Since this was my official Fathers Day celebration I was happy as I could be. Steaks on the grill later, a nice glass of wine or two, and hopefully a restful nights sleep afterwards. If you get my drift.
I’ve been having some fun with lists for the last week but I think it’s time to step back into journal mode to update a few personal things. With this continuing rain we’ve been having the garden has really taken off. Last year when I planted my first rhubarb plant after three months it was approximately one foot high and I was really concerned that it wouldn’t make it through the winter. As of yesterday that stupid plant is now over six feet high and going strong. It looks like I’ll harvest enough seeds from it to plant a few more places around the property. You just can’t have too much of that wonderful stuff around since this years current price is hovering around $3.80 a pound. That s just highway robbery in my view so the more I grow the better.
Last weekend I spent a portion of Saturday doing the ceiling fan shuffle. I installed a new sleeker model fan with a light kit in our bedroom and a matching fan without a light kit into the room I spent all winter remodeling. The remodeled room is almost ninety percent furnished with nothing left to do except put a organizer system into the closet. It looks freaking fabulous. I then took the old fan from our bedroom and installed conveniently into my man cave directly above my computer desk. That will make for a nice cool blogging summer.
Tonight we were invited to my better-half’s daughter’s home for shish kabobs on the grill. With the school year almost over she’s preparing for her first summer vacation with the new baby. After teaching everyone else’s kids all year, she can now spend some quality time with her son. I see a lot of beach time in his immediate future which he will probably love. We were able to catch up on things a little and enjoyed the meal and conversation immensely. We made an early night of it and returned home with full bellies and smiles on our faces. It was a very nice visit.
We’re do for what looks like two or three more days of rain which is always badly needed to keep the garden healthy. That should give me enough time to continue work on a project I started more than a year ago. I’ve been working off and on a somewhat strange abstract bust of my better-half and I’m finally making some real progress on it since the room remodel was completed. I recently finished the hair which was a tedious job and within a month I should have this project finally completed.
We’re having a really great start to the Spring and Summer and plans are already taking shape for a long weekend to the wilds of northern Maine to get into the woods and take as many pictures as necessary to fill every memory card we have.
We also have an obligatory two day trip to visit her family in Rhode Island which should be fun too. This could actually turn into a rather nice summer barring any unplanned catastrophes. We plan on enjoying it as much as we possibly can before the next long winter begins. I might even be talked into a night at the amusement park in Old Orchard Beach. You’re never too old to jump on a ride or two and have a little fun.
Enjoy your summer.
I thought I’d stop complaining about politics for a few days to begin complaining about Mother Nature and her lack of respect for me and my gardening skills. We seem to have the start of a summer with no moderate weather conditions. For most of the month of May we had warm days and very cold nights. We also were taken by surprise by a late frost or two that hit us with almost no notice. The days were warm but the wind had a cold edge to it that just wouldn’t let up. The frost ended up costing us a few dollars when it killed a number of the recently purchased cucumber plants.
In past years that would have set me off but I guess when you can’t do control something you have to move along and not let it make you too crazy. I replanted the cukes again after being assured by a nursery owner friend that we were safe from another frost. Do we get a few days of moderate weather? No effing way.
A week ago I was sitting on my deck relaxing and talking with my sister in Pittsburgh. It was warm but still had a bit of chill in the air. My sister was complaining about the heat wave they were suffering from and that the temps had been in the eighties for a few days. We here in Maine usually receive the exact weather as Pennsylvania just three or so days later. We had a day of moderate rain and then our heat wave arrived just as expected. For three miserable days the heat was almost unbearable. It was too hot to sit on the deck until late afternoon and sleeping became a freaking nightmare. All of this weather and it wasn’t even June yet. On top of the stifling heat the sun effectively roasted and toasted a large section of the garden.
So I make another trip back to the nursery for a few more replacement plants. A number of other plants were slightly damaged as well but we were still hoping for a little rain to help them survive. Three days later they died as well as did some of the latest replacements. This kind of stuff is expected these days with weird weather patterns slowly becoming the norm. It gives me a whole new understanding and appreciation of how it must have been back in the day when your life and your families life depended on having a successful garden and crops. Those old time farmers must have had a great deal of faith and a lot of guts.
Once again I replanted all of the cucumbers, watered them in, and prayed the weather would moderate a little with just enough rain to keep them healthy. It was now the first of June and I hoped for the best. Another mistake for sure. I monitored the weather and soon became aware of possible thunder storms heading our way. It began to rain and it poured for hours. It was so bad that some of my newest plantings were washed out of the ground. I’m beginning to get the idea that the gardening gods are messing with me.
If your going to garden you must be ready for almost anything. Patience is required as well as a supply of really good cuss words. They don’t actually help the situation but they do have the ability to make you feel a little better.
I’ve just replanted the cukes for the third and hopefully last time.
At the rate the grass is growing it should be knee high in a matter of days. That should give me something new to stress about. Mother Nature is definitely not our friend so far this Spring.
It appears that Spring Is really here this time. The night time temperatures are rising and yesterday they made it into the mid-eighties for the first time. Maybe just maybe we can put the worries about frost and cold air behind us. We suffered a light frost two nights ago which was more than a little unusual for late May even here In Maine.
The garden’s been completed with all the plants in the ground and on their way to producing the things we require for next winter. The herb garden had some recent issues with space requirements due to an out of control apple mint plant that was determined to take over the entire area. It grew up and over an oregano plant that I’ve had for years and killed it. I was forced to attack that plant with a shovel and cut away close to sixty-five percent of it. I then surrounded it with a box that extends deep into the soil to stop it from spreading it’s runners in every direction. I replanted three new oregano plants nearby and hopefully they’ll grow healthy and keep us supplied through next winter. I need to be extra careful that I don’t harvest too much or I’ll be the idiot responsible for killing them.
Last year at the beginning of the season I planted two rhubarb plants. I knew it would be at least a year before I could harvest any of them for jams or jellies. The plants need to be firmly established before you can start chopping away at them. I think I’ve been successful because both plants are growing out of control already. Normally my neighbors, who also grow rhubarb plants, see theirs grow not much more than two feet high. Both of my plants are going strong and are already three and a half feet high and I can just about taste that strawberry-rhubarb jam we’ll be making later this Fall.
I can now sit on the deck and watch the garden grow for the next three months. I’ll be forced to kill some insects, slugs, and other assorted pests but that’s just normal gardening activities. My biggest fears are the deer that love to show up once the plants are a few inches tall and chew them off a ground level. This is the same battle my father fought for years and never was able to completely win.
Everyone I know has their own methods for dealing with deer but honestly they don’t have much more success than he did. I’ve been told to spread powdered blood around, hang human hair in panty hose from the trees, build a six foot high fence, and the best and most disgusting solution was for me to urinate around the garden whenever possible. As much as I like peeing outside, I think I’ll skip that one. It could very quickly make my neighbors a little uncomfortable.
My better-half has suggested we build a human size scarecrow in the hopes it will scare the deer away in those early hours of the morning when they usually visit. I think I’ll try and create one that looks as much like my ex-wife as possible. It should certainly scare the hell out of them just like it will scare the hell out of me. I guess I can deal with that kind of trauma if it keeps the freaking deer out of my garden. Man just thinking about that sends a cold chill up my back.
Thank God there aren’t many moose in this general vicinity. Even a scarecrow of my ex-wife wouldn’t scare those big bastards away. Life in Maine is always interesting.
Our fear of snow and frost has finally past and I can get on with our Spring and Summer plans. I’ve been sun burned once already and now I’m taking extra steps to be a little more careful. With the remodel in the house completed I can now center all of my attention to the yard and garden.
I visited a friend yesterday who lives nearby and owns a small nursery. He is a supplier of plants to many of the local and larger nurseries in southern Maine. He’s been very helpful over the years in educating me on growing plants in this State. I decided to shop around a little because every year he offers plants for sale that many others in the area do not.
I started looking through his new greenhouses and I couldn’t stop myself from loading up on plants. I have a fairly large cold frame at home and I purchased enough plants to completely fill it and then some. I filled my car with hot peppers, pickling cucumbers, squash, zucchini, and mustard plants. It was an excellent start for the season. I also purchased seedlings of three types of lettuce, spinach, and a couple cherry tomato plants. I’ll be planting the cold resistant plants today but waiting another week before starting anything else. The weather here can be weird at times with unannounced frost occurring well into May. I’ve been burned before so I won’t let it happen again.
Every garden has issues and mine is no different. I’ve been trying for years to grow big, fat, and red tomatoes with absolutely no luck. We instead plant the cherry tomatoes which always thrive in the same damn soil. I had the soil tested and added whatever was needed to get it balanced properly and still no success. I love making my homemade pasta sauces and salsas but it’s always much better when made with freshly grown tomatoes.
I finished construction of a new type of trellis for my beans. I’m planting both red and yellow climbing beans which should completely fill this trellis in no time. We always do well with them and eat those beans all winter long. There is nothing better to eat on a cold February night.
I’ll be looking for some kale seedlings in the next few day as well. Our harvest of kale last summer made our winter soups pretty damn tasty. I just wash it, blanch it and the freeze it. I like it almost as well as frozen spinach and I’m hoping I’ll have the same success as in the past.
My better-half is obsessed with sun flowers and required me to set aside an area in the garden for them. She usually plants a large variety of sizes and colors including the mammoth plants that can get 10 to 12 feet tall. At the end of the season we allow the heads to dry and they feed hundreds of birds for a few weeks.
Well, the plants have been transferred into the cold frame to await a warmer week. I installed my simple but effective sprinkler system which should keep all of the plants well watered and healthy. Now all I have to worry about are Mother Natures little helpers. Deer, rabbits, squirrels, horn worms, and all of natures other little inconveniences that make gardening such a challenge.
I’m lying here this morning and cursing the fact that Spring has apparently sprung. These last few days of beautiful weather must have effected by mind and made me even more stupid than people say I am. I’ve been completely caught up in the Spring Fever craziness and I’m paying the price for it today.
Yesterday was my first full day dedicated totally to yard work and garden preparations. I dearly love gardening but I made a rookie mistake and allowed myself to forget about the basics of working outside. Full sunshine should never be ignored or forgotten, EVER. I started my day by pulling out the rototiller and spent an hour turning over the soil in the garden to loosen it up before planting. Then getting even more stupid I continued working by placing black landscape fabric over the garden frames and attaching it to the ground with large metal staples. This fabric is cool because it eliminates weeding but still allows the rain water to soak through. The sun was very hot but I was in the gardening zone, unfortunately.
I was still pumped about the day so I decided after finishing the fabric installation to fire up my riding mower and do a quick yard cleanup. Now I’ve been in the sun without any lotion or hat for some four hours. I was still feeling good so I kept on going by cutting the grass for the first time this year.
If you look up the word stupid in the dictionary you just might find my photograph there. I am the poster boy for stupid as reflected in my cherry red head, nose, cheeks, ears, and lips. I took a shower before going to bed and I’m surprised the neighbors didn’t hear all the screaming. I am an effing moron who looks like a French Fry. I slopped at least a pint of lotion on my face and head hoping that it would help but it didn’t. I probably won’t be able to shave in the morning or even smile.
After all of that I still had a great day. Having been sick for the previous week really put me behind schedule on the garden work and unfortunately Mother Nature waits for no man. Now I’m fully up to speed and back on schedule. As soon as my face stops glowing I’ll be right back out there playing in the dirt and enjoying as much of the warm weather as I can.
I’d like to continue this posting but a cold shower and another bottle of lotion await.
I had a hour of free time today so I decided to take a trip down memory lane. My better-half has gotten it into her head to do a little redecorating of the house. She’s started using one of my own favorite terms against me, "think outside the box." I’ve been trying for years to convince her to leave her comfort zone and use her creative abilities and now I’m afraid I may have created a monster.
For years I’ve gone through creative periods myself and produced art works that are considered unusual by some and well "outside the box" to others. Many of those pieces were discarded as I moved from place to place over the years and I regret that. Fortunately, many others I did save and have been moving them around with me for decades.
After I moved into this house I laid claim to a very small and unused room where I now store many of these pieces. My better-half has requested that I look through the room for anything interesting she could use in her redecorating efforts. I began today by slowing pulling out each piece to determine condition and suitability. It was like a really weird trip down memory lane. As I looked at each piece the exact memories of when it was made come rushing back. I was able to remember people and places I thought I’d forgotten. I was very surprised just how quickly and vividly those memories came rushing back. I guess it’s my own version of a poor man’s time travel machine. It appears to be true that the brain keeps all of our experiences stored away in it’s attic awaiting retrieval.
One of my most involved projects took me years to complete. It was a series of twenty collages varying in size from a few inches to four feet in length. These collages contain tidbits of my life that I began saving when I enlisted in the Army. They contain bits and pieces of my life collected over many years with photos of old friends, , family, love letters, newspaper articles, mementos, and just about anything else you can think of. The entire project was called " My Life Panels".
I spent almost all of my time yesterday just sitting and reading these panels, seeing forgotten old friends, and remembering details of my rather interesting life. I’ll have to continue this process at a later time because today I’ve become totally distracted. It might be easier and go a little quicker if I have my better-half involved. She’s always had the ability to keep me from becoming too sidetracked.
I can look back now and thank myself for a job well done. I truthfully never expected the day to come when I’d be using the panels in this way. I think I did good.
everyuselessthing.com 