Archive for the ‘winter’ Tag
I needed a few hours of peace and quiet and since that’s virtually impossible at home I decided to take my camera and disappear into the woods for a couple of hours. The temperature was in the low forties which made the woods a little more bearable than normal. No hordes of black flies and gnats and no sweating through my clothing because of the summer heat. That’s a win/win anytime for me and motivates me to make more visits during these cooler months.
As I walked onto the trail the first thing I noticed was the absolute quiet. That’s a Winter quiet that takes a little getting used to. During warm weather the place is nothing but noise from birds, squirrels, and any other wildlife that’s passing through the area. The leaves have fallen and the fields of milkweed pods have opened up and spilled their seeds everywhere.
This place is usually teeming with birds but almost all of them have headed south for the Winter. I saw two cardinals frolicking through the nearby trees filled with red berries. They should be really happy, there’s enough berries in this area to feed them and all of their friends until next summer. If you squint just a little you can just see the male cardinal keeping an close eye on me while his mate eats nearby.
I always try to visit the small ponds and swamps when I’m here and today I found the places dead quiet as well. It’s been just cold enough over the last few days to begin freezing the ponds. Even in these conditions I still love spending time here and I’m not sure why, I just do.
Another thing I like about the late Fall is that the leaves have dropped and now make it possible to see things you normally can’t. It’s the only time of the year when I can truly appreciate the beauty of the white birch trees scattered throughout these woods. They almost seem to glow in the bright sunlight and it’s really breathtaking.
The quarter mile before returning to my car is a walk that takes me through an area diverse with every kind of tree and bush. It always seems in such perfect balance, something Mother Nature seems to be very good at.
As I return home I feel refreshed and relaxed, something that always occurs after I’ve spent some time here. I’ll be returning soon after the first significant snow fall to begin my 2014 Winter collection of photos.
I’m still stalking my friend, the big fat barn owl. I took this picture a few years ago and have been trying to find him just one more time ever since. I’ve seen him flying overhead on many occasions but he apparently roosts in some of the tallest pine trees located along the Scarborough River. It makes getting any decent photographs very difficult. I hope some day my persistence pays off and he agrees to pose for me again.
I’m still waiting . . . . for what you might ask . . . . for dryness. This last week here in Maine was like the monsoon season in India except for the bone chilling icy cold nights. I mentioned in a recent post about all the effing leaves I’ve been dealing with and I’m here to tell you it hasn’t gotten any better. Not only do we have more leaves than before but they’re now soaking wet. There’s nothing harder than trying to rake giant piles of wet leaves because they refuse to cooperate. I’m only bringing it up again because it’s my one and only chore for today and I just don’t want to do it.
‘Dumb Birds’
As I write this post I’m tightly wrapped in my red dragon blanket, still in bed, sipping my coffee, and looking out the window at another gray and damp day. Most of the trees have dropped their leaves except for a few of the more stubborn oaks. They always seem to hang on a little longer than the others before giving it up for the Winter. As usual I can just make out a few squirrels romping through the nearby tree branches enjoying the last days of Fall. I won’t see much of them again until we have a few warmer than normal days later in the Winter. They’ll sneak out, look around, smell the air, and try to find an acorn or two. Then it’ll be back to their nests to await Spring’s arrival. I guess those squirrels have the right idea. I’m trying to do much the same thing if you think about it. If it’s good enough for a bunch of furry little squirrels then it should work for me as well, right?
Most of the birds have headed south and at times I envy them. The woodpeckers, the blue jays, and chickadees are back in large numbers and will be around for the entire winter. We supply them with plenty of food and suet to help them through the worst of it. It always amazes me that any of them ever survive the Winter. This morning I found our backyard filled with black birds and I’m not sure what they were looking for but they working hard at it.
‘Stupid Birds’
For the first time in a week I can actually see blue skies and the sun. I can remember as a kid how much my friends and I loved climbing onto and under the piles of leaves. My Dad found it amusing for as long as it took him to realize we were making more work for him. Maybe today I’ll revert to an earlier version of myself, pile up some leaves, and dive right in. The smell of those wet leaves should take me right back to age seven for a few minutes. Then reality will set back in and I’ll realize I’m sitting in a pile of wet leaves in the middle of my yard and giving the neighbors a reason to question my sanity.
As I stepped out my back door I received another big surprise. From out of nowhere two chickens arrived at my door and are refusing to leave. Now I’ll be forced to spend time today polling my neighbors to see who they belong to. I’ll never again feel guilty about eating chickens . . . they’re too stupid to live.
“Dumb and Stupid Birds’
Anyone out there interested in a few chicken wings?
I’ve spent most of this Summer documenting my activities in the garden and elsewhere. It was fun for me and I always had plenty of things to do which supplied me with lots of material for posting. With Winter fast approaching material concerning my outside activities will become a little more difficult to find. That’s okay I guess if all you want to read is a continuous steam of snow stories and photographs of more snow. Believe me when I tell you I’m no snow bunny and while I like Winter and snow that doesn’t mean I want to be outside playing in it. That’s for other people to do and for me to talk about, photograph, and make fun of.
Useless Quote #1
“The production of too many useful things results in too many useless people.” Karl Marx
As most of you know I have a huge collection of material that contains nothing but thousands of facts about everything and nothing. This blog was initially created to share some of that totally useless information and I think it’s time to lay some silly, stupid, yet true facts on all of you once again.
Useless Quote #2
“High School is like a spork it’s a crappy spoon and a crappy fork, so in the end it’s just plain useless.” John Mayer
Here are ten items which might be considered a teaser for things to come. You can judge that for yourself.
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People magazine began it’s Sexiest Man Alive covers in 1985. The first man to be so named was none other than that calm and rational Mel Gibson.
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The first federal census in this country was conducted in 1790. A population of 3,929,625 which included 697,624 slaves was recorded in the seventeen existing states.
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There are roughly 47 billion chickens in the world (this fact is supplied primarily as a jab at my better-half). She’s been strong arming me for months to buy a few chickens. Not happening lovey.
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American Gothic, the famous Grant Wood painting was completed in 1930. The couple posing for the piece were his dentist and sister. I hope Mr. Wood was better looking than his sister.
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More than half a million gallons of water pour over Niagara Falls every second. An interesting factoid but who really cares?
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Peter Merholtz is credited for coming up with the term "blog". Never heard of him before and I suspect I’ll never hear about him again.
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The first US intercollegiate athletic competition took place in August of 1852. Yale competed against Harvard in a rowing contest. Yawn. . . . .!
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In Arizona it ‘s against the law to have more than two dildos in a house. Is there anyone out there who wants to move to Arizona anyway? I think I’ll stay right where I’m at.
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The average person in the U.S. eats more than 50 tons of food in his or her lifetime. I’ll bet 30% of this food was purchased from drive-thru’s.
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Elvis Presley was born on January 8, 1935. His twin brother, Jesse Garon Presley, was stillborn. It could really have been interesting if his brother had survived. Just imagine two Elvis’s, what a duet that would have made.
Useless Quote #3
“You’re useless, I’m bored – yes or no” Simon Cowell
Everything you’ve always wanted to know about nothing in particular, right?. I hope to keep these tidbits coming on a regular basis throughout the winter between the snow storms. snow blowing, snow shoveling, and falling on my ass a few times.
If you ever move to Maine one of your favorite words will soon become the word SUCK. All forms of the word apply to so many things here you’re forced into learning how to use it properly. Follow along and learn just how versatile the word can be.
This SUCKY Maine winter continues but unfortunately for me I seem to be caught in a bad SUCK cycle right now. Did you ever have times where things start going wrong and just SUCK. They say that bad things come in threes but I’m no longer a believer in that old wives tale. For me 2014 has started on an ominous note where bad things came in groups or CLUSTER SUCKS.
My favorite computer on which I do all of my writing and photography has decided to start SUCKING. It contains my life as it currently exists which goes to show how bad my life SUCKS as well. As sad as that sounds this computer never has issues because I’ve protected it from viruses, mal-ware, and anything else I could think of. It’s been as reliable as any I’ve ever owned. Then I made the mistake of permitting an update to install from good old SUCKY Apple ITunes. Now I SUCK for being that stupid. From that point on my computer’s registry was damaged causing lots of SUCKY error messages that I’ve been unsuccessful in fixing. I’ve read everything and tried everything with no luck. I just wanted to scream but had no one to scream at. That SUCKS!
My next adventure began soon after the SUCKING computer nightmare. I was awakened two nights ago and my bedroom felt like the inside of a freezer. Someone who shall remain nameless and whose responsibility has always been keeping the house supplied with heating oil, dropped the ball. No heating oil during a cold week in Maine in the middle of Winter is the definition of SUCKING. Fortunately we have an oil delivery company that was able to respond within 24 hours and refilled the tank. For a change they didn’t SUCK. You’d think that our problems had been solved but not quite. When things begin to SUCK it then comes contagious.
It seems when a oil tank goes empty the new oil causes a vapor lock in the feeder line and won’t permit any to flow properly until the line has been cleared. That I’ve come to find out just SUCKS. In past years when this problem occurred it required an emergency service call that lasted only fifteen minutes and cost $150.00. That not only SUCKS but it’s also borderline extortion. The better-half and I immediately decided that we’d try to correct the problem ourselves this time around. After calling on informational resources from SEMI-SUCKY friends and a few SUCKY YouTube videos, an hour and three hundred SUCKY curse words later we had our heat back on. Good news, right? Not hardly. That’s an hour of my life I can’t afford to lose and that SUCKS.
Two hours later on this calm Maine winter night with no wind gusts, no ice storms, no sleet or any other related weather issues we lost all of our electric power in the house for some unknown but SUCKY reason. Since we live in an area where cell phones have difficulty receiving a signal we were stuck sitting in the dark and bitching to one another. That made for a really SUCKY few minutes of conversation, for sure. It was a double SUCKING kick in the ass because we have a whole-house generator that should have kicked on immediately. Guess what? It didn’t freaking work and that SUCKED.
We’re now back and operational but who needs the constant stress of SUCKY crap like this? Now every time the wind blows I’ll be holding my breath waiting for the power to fail with no operating generator. That will definitely SUCK once again when that repair bill arrives. If this is any indication of how the remainder of 2014 is going to be, we are screwed.
2014 SUCKS THE BIG ONE SO FAR
The groundhog is like most other prophets; it delivers its prediction and then disappears. ~Bill Vaughn
Today is one of my favorite stupid and senseless holidays. It’s one that was cooked up by a bunch of German immigrants from Pennsylvania many years ago. As I’ve explained in years past, I’ve had an up-close and personal relationship with “Phil” and all of the nonsense that takes place in Punxatawney, PA.
It’s a tongue-in-cheek celebration to the entire world except for a few idiot local politician’s looking to get some face-time on the news. Even a groundhog is smart enough to know that there’ll be six more weeks of winter when it’s only freaking February.
As I surfed around today I found a web page that must be having a really slow month when it published the following list of eleven reasons why we should be celebrating this auspicious occasion.
11. It’s on nearly every calendar.
10. Helps relieve cabin fever.
9. Spring or not, it’s six weeks till St Urho’s Day.
8. Forecast is no less reliable than the National Weather Service.
7. At least one of them critters is bound to see things your way.
6. Valentine’s Day is too depressing for nerds.
5. Unlike the Easter bunny, he keeps his dirty paws outside.
4. As they used to say on radio: “The Shadow knows”.
3. It’s fun to say “Punxsutawney”.
2. If a rodent can bring us an early spring, more power to him.
1. In Minnesota, either way we come out ahead.
Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you. ~Maori Proverb
I apologize if you nodded off midway through that list. I’m not saying I could have done better but OMG. I think the author might have reconsidered that list when both of his hands fell asleep as he typed it. They were that bored. It is just a real yawner . . . . .
“The trouble with weather forecasting is that it’s right too often for us to ignore it and wrong too often for us to rely on it.” ~Patrick Young
I know that many of you think Groundhog Day is lame but this year the impossible finally happened to make it unlame. Some NFL genius scheduled the Superbowl on Ground Hog Day just so they could steal some of good old “Punxatawney Phil’s” thunder. It’s just those damn sports fanatics attempting to glom on to Phil’s fan base. Just a shameless maneuver on their part.
HAPPY GROUND HOG DAY EVERYONE
SEATTLE RULES!!
I thought today I’d show you a few photographs I took during my travels yesterday. Even though it’s winter and freezing cold with snow piled just about everywhere, I needed to get away from the house for a few hours. I reverted to my old habits, took my camera, and began my search for some old cemeteries.
“A cold and wintery resting place.”
One of the things I like best about living in New England is the number of ancient cemeteries that are scattered throughout almost every community. It seems that every large family back in the 1600’s that owned property maintained a private cemetery for their family members. Almost all of them have survived but most are difficult to visit since they’re away from public roads and on private property.
“This shows how old the cemetery really is. These folks were buried here before those trees existed.”
I became quite the cemetery visitor when I lived in southern Massachusetts back in the 1980s. My ex-wife and I owned a small gift shop and as part of that business I painted landscapes of local cemeteries and sold them in the shop. For a time I could be found creeping around the older of the cemeteries with a supply of T-shirts to stretch over tombstones to do gravestone rubbings. A great many people thought the idea of owning a T-shirt with their family name on it was edgy and cool. They sold like hot cakes. On one occasion I was visited by the local police in a cemetery where they questioned me as to my activities. Fortunately I was able to explain things to them and avoided arrest. Within a week I had supplied one of those officers with his own personalized shirt and was never bothered again.
“The day was too bright and made the names difficult to capture.”
I just love cemeteries, the older the better. It’s a quiet and serene place to spend a hour relaxing and reading old epithets. Yesterday I found a few within a short drive from my home that were accessible and not covered in snow.
“I tweaked this photo with software but still couldn’t get the names readable.”
I can’t wait for the return of Spring and Summer weather so I can search out a few more of the isolated graveyards and add their photo’s to my collection.
There was a time time in my life when I was the ultimate night person. I slept all day and worked and played all night. After work I’d visit a variety of clubs and bars returning home in the wee hours of the morning. It was a great time in my life because everyone knows the best shit happens after dark in the middle of the night.
I worked those hours for more than five years. My job required visits to massage parlors (not officially as a patron), strip joints (not officially as a paying customer), and even the occasional brothel (again, not as a paying customer). I became educated very quickly to the unbelievable quantity of nightlife activities, how to enjoy them, and even more important, how to survive them.
The more things change the more they remain the same. All these years later I’m discovering a whole new word of nightlife here in Maine that I’ve been totally unaware of. We live in what could be called a rural area. Our home is adjacent to a small river and a large forest of pines. We live far enough out that without assistance from technology (range extender) we can’t receive cell phone signals and are not registering on most GPS devices. It’s like living in Never-Never Land. That being said, we love it. We thought that “wildlife” in this area was mostly confined to the Portland metro area and was low key and had a minimum of crime to deal with. How little we really knew.
Last night we had an unusual snow fall. It snowed for no more than twenty minutes and then stopped completely. There was just enough snow to cover everything in a pristine white sheet. We went to bed after the snow fall stopped and remarked to each other about how white and smooth the back yard seemed with the new snow cover. There wasn’t a mark of any kind on that snow.
We awoke this morning and walked to the window and were shocked at what we saw. It appears that our backyard is the night club for most of the “wildlife” in this area. These pictures will give you some idea of the night time traffic taking place in our back yard.
We live our lives giving little or no thought to the “life” swirling around us every day and night. I saw tracks of coyotes, deer, chipmunks, squirrels, one lonely turkey, a big fat skunk, and a trail left by that sneaky cat belonging to our neighbors. I’m not surprised too often but this was amazing. I guess that one day warming trend we were blessed with brought everyone out to celebrate.
I think I may have to pay a little more attention to what’s going on around me. With a good lens and a small night light I might just be able to get some really interesting photographs.
I’m sitting here this morning trying to decide whether leaving this warm bed is the smartest thing to do. The weather remains problematic as always and I’m not in the mood to deal with it today. It’s been in the deep freeze here for two weeks and it isn’t expected to warm up anytime soon. The only thing I know for sure is that I can’t spend the next two months in this bed as much as I’d like to.
I’ve been trying to be as careful as possible with all of the snow and ice we’ve been having. Now that my broken leg is almost healed I’m deathly afraid of slipping or falling and ending up back in the hospital. I’m walking very softly these days.
The better-half stumbled out of bed early today for another shopping safari with her daughter. It was unplanned but she responded immediately to the telephone call, rolled out of bed and hit the ground running. Nothing is more important than spending a little quality time with her grandson and shopping at the same time. If she’s lucky she may be completely awake by the time they arrive to pick her up but she’s like a zombie right now.
I began a small construction project this week which has been on hold because of this cold weather. I plan on removing a large window in our living room and I need at least three hours of warmer weather to do it. It shouldn’t take too long to remove the window, replace the missing studs and insulation and then close up the hole. I can finish the rest from the inside of the house in just a few hours of drywalling and painting. I must be out of my mind doing this in February. Why I didn’t I do it in September is beyond me. I’ll just sit around for another week or two waiting for a few hours of temperatures above the freezing mark. Hurry up and wait.
I have a quiet day planned for today but it never seems to work out that way. I need to spend at least forty five minutes on the dreaded treadmill before I do anything else. It’s been a huge help in rehabilitating my leg. It still amazes me how much a limb can deteriorate in such a short period of time. Another week should have my injured leg back to it’s normal size. Rebuilding lost muscle tissue is difficult and time consuming but must be done as quickly as possible.
Since the better-half has four days off I thought I’d surprise her with a night on the town. I have a few ideas of places to visit with the Great Lost Bear heading the list. It’s the best place in the Portland area where she can feed her ever increasing addiction to smoking hot chicken wings. They specialize in XXX wings that are hot enough to set your hair on fire. The second possibility is The Strike Zone located in Old Orchard Beach and their specialty is deep fried everything. It’s a typically small sports bar where deep fried foods are the rule of the day. My weight loss program will be at serious risk if we go there but OMG the food is delicious.
It’s time to get motivated and moving. I love Winter.
Well the weekend has passed without much of interest to talk about. I have to tell you though that taking Sundays off from my life is something I recommend highly for anyone to try. No exercising, no blogging and no dieting. As always I remind you that Sunday as a day of rest for me is not a religious leftover from my childhood. It just happens to fit into my strangely scheduled current lifestyle.
We had another eight inches of snow through the night which meant I was to spend at least a half hour with my favorite motorized friend, the snowblower. The snow was wet and heavy and a real pain in the ass to deal with. I did it quickly so my better-half could access the outside world and then I returned to my day-off. I snapped a few pictures around the house of this storm because the snow was sticking to everything and made for some interesting photos.
The weather has warmed a little which brings out the visiting birds in large numbers. We feed them regularly but in frigid weather they become scarce. Since we live in a forested area we have three or four generations of woodpeckers that stay with us all winter. We place suet out for them because they’re the most successful in pecking it apart when it’s frozen.
They’ve been flying in and out in shifts so often they’re averaging one suet container a week. It apparently keeps them healthy and makes living through the winter months a little easier.
I then decided to leave the warm bosom of my house to explore the neighboring area for a few photo’s of the snow scenes. Here are three that should give you a better idea about what Maine is like in winter.
It’s now Monday morning and I’m back on the treadmill for a mile or two of good heath and exhaustion. The better-half’s loving the new slimmer me but I think it’s just her way of motivating me a little more. Either way it’s a win/win.
It’s been another interesting few days. My favorite schizophrenic bitch, Mother Nature, has returned with a vengeance once again. Maine is already well known as being a weather nightmare with constantly changing conditions but it seems to have gotten a bit worse in recent months. Let me explain just a bit.
Four days ago we were in the midst of a blizzard and over the course of a week we received approximately 3- 4 feet of snow. The snow was bad enough but then the temperatures dipped to a really tropical -25° and it wasn’t pretty. I’m not even taking into consideration the wind-chill factor at the time which took the “feel like” temps even lower.
I’ve said on many occasions that I love winter and I love snow but OMG this has been ridiculous. Fortunately those of us living in Maine are normally well prepared for cold weather more than many other places in the country. That being said it’s still difficult to function outdoors during subzero weather regardless of how prepared you think you are.
We waited for a few days for the weather to break and for temperatures to rise to a reasonable level but yet again Mother Nature had other plans. The temperature did rise into the mid 30s which was a relief for everyone because the worry of frozen water pipes finally disappeared. I rolled out of bed as I normally do the next morning and thought I was dreaming. It was raining so hard I thought I was imagining things but I wasn’t. As the rain continued for almost a full day it began to melt the snow and the combination of the two water sources brought an immediate rash of flash flood warnings. Just what we needed to keep things interesting.
After all that, last night after the rain stopped, I walked out of my garage and found my driveway to be suitable for a professional hockey game. All that water and slush had frozen solid and was as hard as concrete. It was then I decided to listen to the experts and I returned to the house, closed the door, turned up the heat and turned on the television. Thank God for our electric blanket is all I can say. I found myself over the last few days spending a lot of time in bed watching TV because it’s the only place in the house that was warm and comfortable enough.
The recent forecasts indicate little or no relief in sight which is the last thing any of us wanted to hear. We’re certainly not alone since most of the country is suffering from similar weather conditions or worse. It’s time to dig into the closet and find those ugly old long-johns, wool socks, and knit caps. There’s nothing more attractive and sexy than climbing into bed with your better-half wearing everything including a parka with a big furry hood and insulated gloves. That’s a centerfold picture no one wants to see.
The wind is howling outside the window as I’m writing and we’re all waiting patiently for the next surprise from good old Mother Nature. Maybe locust! Stay safe and stay warm and welcome to the new Ice Age.
P.S. Bye the way, here’s a big one finger salute to all of you “Global Warning” idiots.
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