Archive for April 2013
Another sunny and warm day here in Maine. I’m already getting spoiled by all this good weather and it isn’t even May yet. I wasn’t all that motivated today but after a couple of cups of good coffee I was raring to go. I had a few errands to run and decided to get them out of the way early.
I first made my way to my favorite book store to return a few paperbacks and to buy a few more. When you read as much as I do it can get very expensive very quickly so a cute little store like this is a god send. I returned five novels and repurchased six new ones for a grand total of $13.00. As always I also get fifteen or twenty minutes of excellent and intelligent conversation at no cost. It’s nice to find a person who is well read and can speak on almost any subject and keep it interesting.
After returning home with my bag of guilt, that once-a-month fast food sin I permit myself, I sat on the deck and ate a thick, greasy, juicy, luscious, and heartwarming hamburger. I can’t even explain what an evil pleasure it gives me along with some salty, oily, and scrumptious french fries. You know when the slop your eating and clogging your arteries with is good when you‘re required to wipe your hands and arms to remove the excess salt and oil. Soooooo effing good!
After partaking of my weaknesses for bad food the guilt was almost unbearable (I did say almost). I decided as penance that I needed to do something worthwhile today which led me to the workshop for primer and painting supplies. I primed a section of my remodeled room, got paint all over me, and then said the hell with it. I cleaned up, took a shower, and settled into the living room with my X-Box. Nothing like a couple of hours of roaming through the world of Harry Potter to relax a person. It was great as always.
My better-half came home from work and surprise, surprise, neither of us felt much like cooking. Into the car and off to our favorite sports bar, The Strike Zone. It just so happened to be “all you can eat” haddock night. So in the spirit of the moment we sat there with a couple of good drinks and stuffed ourselves with all the haddock we could eat and it was incredible. There was one low point to the evening which will require me to drop a note to the chef on my next visit. They have the absolute worst coleslaw I’ve ever tasted in my entire life. Any person serving coleslaw that tastes that bad should be beaten and then arrested and then have his ass kicked again.
I wish I could be a kinder and gentler person but but when someone screws up my coleslaw it really pisses me off. I think I may need some food style anger management.
For as long as I can remember I’ve been fascinated by death. While in the service and during my years as a police officer I was forced to see a great deal of it. I’m unshockable by death itself but not in the ways in which some people exit this reality.
I’ve been a big fan of the annual Darwin Awards for decades because they highlight the funny and odd ways people die. It’s not really macabre because humor makes dealing with almost anything easier. The Darwin Awards pick out a few selected incidents each year and give a fairly graphic description of their stupid, funny, and sometimes ironic deaths. I guess my one wish would be to die in any fashion that keeps me off their list. Dying in a stupid or embarrassing manner is just not acceptable.
I always knew there were many deaths that the Darwin people chose not to publicize so I decided to do some research of my own. Here are a few that caught my attention even though they didn’t make the cut for Darwin. They are from many countries and cover many decades of time.
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In New Orleans in 1985 a guest at a party for lifeguards celebrating their first drowning-free swimming season in memory drowned Tuesday, the director of the New Orleans Recreation Department said today. Madlyn Richard, the department director, said the body of Jerome Moody was found on the bottom at the deep end of a department pool as the party ended. She said Mr. Moody, who was 31 years old, was not a lifeguard, but four lifeguards were on duty at the party.
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Jim Fixx died in 1984 (ironically his arteries were plugged with too much cholesterol). He left a legacy of thousands of joggers and runners that he introduced to the pleasures and benefits of jogging and the sport of running. His book, The Complete Book of Running, became a best seller among running books. When Jim first took up running in the 1960’s, he weighed 220 lbs. By the time his book was published, he had trimmed down to 159 lbs, and was an accomplished runner.
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An ice cream truck driver in Thailand died while laughing in his sleep. Damnoen Saen-um, 52, laughed for about two minutes yesterday and then stopped breathing, the Nation newspaper reported. Damnoen’s wife tried to wake him but he kept laughing. An autopsy suggested that he might have had a heart attack. "I have never seen a case like this. But it is possible that a person could have heart seizure while laughing or crying too hard in their sleep," said Dr. Somchai Chakrabhand, deputy director-general of the Mental Health Department.
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A 38-year-old lawyer with the Toronto law firm of Holden Day Wilson, did indeed plunge to his death from the 24th floor of the Toronto Dominion Bank Tower in front of several horrified witnesses. The firm’s spokesperson said “He was testing the strength of the window. There was a lot of joking about how the window wouldn’t open on a hot day. Apparently, it was the second attempt [at testing the window] that one of them popped out and he went through."
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A church organist was found dead at his Teesside home naked inside a giant plastic bag. Ian Kemp, 48, from Stockton, was found alone in his house bound by his wrists and shins, an inquest heard. A vacuum cleaner was also connected to the bag and it is believed Mr Kemp died after the machine had sucked all the air out of the bag. Teesside Coroner Michael Sheffield said such incidents were sometimes connected to sexual gratification.
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"Escape artist The Amazing Joe Burrus, a recovering drug addict, wanted to give back to society by performing a Houdini-like stunt for a rehab-clinic benefit in 1990. For the act, he was covered under six feet of dirt and wet cement in a locked coffin while bound in chains and handcuffs. After the nine tons of glop were poured on, the coffin collapsed and Burrus was buried alive."
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Brent Tyler and Chelsea Tumbleston (both 21) worked together as waiters at the Wild Wing Café in Columbia, South Carolina. Now this is the Deep South: You must understand that here, lovebirds follow strict courtship rituals. Brent told Chelsea she was pretty as a picture. Her heart a-pitter-patter, Chelsea told Brent he was a most worthy gentleman caller. Then they went for a midnight fuck on the roof. We know they waited to get naked until reaching the building’s metallic pyramid-shaped roof because their clothes were found there. Their nude bodies were not so lucky, discovered lifeless on the street 50 feet below.
I recently had someone tell me in conversation that death by fire was a “terrible way to go”. I think he was full of it because in my humble opinion there is no good way to go. I’ve had people tell me they’d prefer to die while making love. Sorry, I’ll pass on that one too. I never want to die no matter what the circumstances. I plan on going kicking and screaming all the way.
My drywall frustration continued again today shortly after I started priming the ceiling. I’m enough of a realist to understand that no matter how hard you try it’s almost impossible to do a remodeling project in an old house that is just perfect. I accepted that fact and decided early on I would deal with those problems as they occurred. Well, they did.
I purposely made the decision to for this to be a winter project and to take as much time as necessary to do it right. From the first that freaking ceiling was a problem. It wasn’t level and the room wasn’t square but I fixed each issue as best I could and proceeded on. In my heart I knew that no matter what there would be certain areas I could never get perfect.
As soon as I began painting today I discovered a new drywall rule of thumb. Everything good is really bad and everything bad is really good. Every area that I was concerned with turned out perfect and the two areas I was worried the least about became the biggest problems. One area couldn’t be properly fixed and will require additional repair work once the remainder of the room is completed. It’s just so damn frustrating.
Enough with the damn remodel. I finally made my way outside and it was the most gorgeous day so far this month. I managed to complete some of the yard cleanup, chatted with a neighbor or two, and cleared my head of remodeling issues. After my better-half arrived home from work we sat down and began to plan the garden. What and where we should plant, buying additional soil to fill the frames, and a possible expansion of the garden to allow her to plant thirty of forty of the larger species of sunflowers. It was an hour well spent that will make this year’s garden preparation less of a challenge.
One of our neighbors stopped by and he really has a bad case of garden/spring fever. Over the past few summers he and his wife created a basic home garden and discovered how much they enjoyed it. This year their two young daughters, ages five and seven, are becoming more involved. The girls are are ready to jump into things immediately and have already started a few seeds and can’t wait to get a little dirty with their mom and dad in the garden. It should a great summer for all of us exchanging gardening tips and canning techniques. I’m looking forward to my first visit from his girls to talk about our gardens. They’re too cute to be believed.
My book reading goal was reached last night when I completed both my sci-fi and non-fiction novels. I read well into the night and had a great time in the process. Now I can finish the third book at my leisure and take a little time to properly enjoy it.
Slowly but surely I’m making progress.
It seems to me that this one little room remodel has consumed me for a very long time. It continued today much to my chagrin. I thought I’d finally begin the priming and painting to move this project into its final stages but I was wrong again. I decided to do one last up-close inspection before starting to primer and after completing that inspection I put the paint and supplies back in the workshop and returned once again to the joint compound to make a few small repairs. Nothing pisses me off as much as realizing I’m not as meticulous as I thought.
I put down the plastic sheeting one more time, slopped some more joint compound around, and now I’m forced to wait until tomorrow before I can again smooth it out. Another freaking day lost that I could be doing other things but can’t. This project needs to be completed and over. I need to keep in mind that I can’t rush things because if I do I’ll be creating even more problems. So I’ll shut up now and get back to work.
It’s now a few hours later and the minor repairs have been completed to my satisfaction. Of course, my better-half arrived to conduct her own inspection and make a few comments which always makes me a little crazy. She was somewhat kind and took it easy on me because she knew how pissed off I was. So now it’s time to kick back for a few hours and try to change my focus from drywalling and painting to the garden and yard cleanup.
I briefly checked in on the progress of the Boston bombing but there wasn’t much new to hear. I realize it’s too early to expect anything new but like every other citizen of this country I’m angry and want justice and some dark and savage revenge on the fuckers responsible for this outrage. Again I’m forced to wait for results. I’m a very impatient person and waiting makes me effing crazy.
I have a little extra time today to catch up my reading. I normally like to read one book at a time but I find myself with three different books only partially read. I’ve been skipping from one to the other and it’s a little distracting. On top of that, one book is on an e-reader (science fiction), another is a large and bulky hardcover (non-fiction), and the third an old tattered paperback (fiction). It’s effectively ruining all three stories for me and it’s time for me to fix things. I plan on finishing the sci-fi today which should be easy enough with only a couple of hundred pages remaining. Then tomorrow I’ll knock off the non-fiction book after finishing the first coat of primer and paint in this freaking room.
The next few days are expected to be sunny and clear but not particularly warm. I plan on spending some quality time with my camera and maybe walk a few quiet miles through some nearby woods. It’s a little early in the season to expect much in the way of photographs but it’s really more about getting out the house for a few hours. Believe me, it will be a pleasure to take photo’s of anything that isn’t covered with or standing in snow.
C’mon springtime.
Let’s add up the tally for today. My better-half has a day off, that’s one. The sun is shining and the day is clear, that’s two. I’m sitting enjoying my morning caffeine, that’s three. The yard and home are in desperate need of attention and cleanup, that’s four. Do you have to guess what’s coming next or can you do the math.
A sunny yet cold day that’s deceivingly enticing can be instantly turned into a backbreaking, ball-busting labor camp by my better-half who’s heavily intoxicated with a killer dose of Spring Fever. I’ve again been assigned the position of worker bee while the Queen barks orders as she lays on her comfortable chaise lounge on the deck. I exaggerate a bit for maximum effect since I know she’ll be reading this later.
Clean that porch, lift that barge, tote that bale, rake the yard or you’ll land in jail. What more can you ask for but a huge amount of work that needs doing and a person who stands by to assist you in doing them in the proper order. This is just the beginning of another Spring that forces all Maine residents to get up and get moving.
You need to understand that the growing season in the state of Maine is about fifteen minutes long. Winter starts in late October and lasts into May. Then you have a few weeks of rain and mud and all of a sudden it’s June. If you plan on your garden being successful without fear of frost you must wait until mid June before planting. That gives you about ninety days to grow your garden, harvest the fruits of your labors, and begin preparations for the coming winter. So complaining about the Spring cleanup is a total waste of time. The work must be done quickly but never silently. I work a lot better when I can schedule a few “bitch breaks” to make myself feel better.
We made a great deal of progress today but there’s still a lot of work ahead. I finished up in mid afternoon and we returned to the house to be hit with the Boston Marathon bombing news. Our sympathies go out to those families who’ve suffered the ultimate loss and those with maimed or wounded members. It’s a sad fact of life that these killers are still out there and we’re still as vulnerable as ever, even after spending billions on prevention.
I only hope our current administration shows more resolve in dealing with terrorism than it’s shown in the past. The Presidents speech last night didn’t fill me with confidence. I would have thought that Mr. Charisma could have shown a bit more emotion or actual concern. I guess his charisma only kicks in when he’s talking about himself. I can already picture his possible cynical political maneuvers from this tragedy. This may give him the excuses to push for armed drones flying over American cities armed with Hellfire missiles to kill suspected terrorists. God help us all!
There are a few things that are unavoidable in life. Death and taxes come to mind but a few others are almost as unavoidable especially if you’re a man. I’ve been around longer than I care to admit and that in itself has inevitably forced me to closely study and attempt to understand the human female. As hard as it is to believe, I’ve made very little progress. On any given day I’m confronted with comments from women about guys “leaving the seat up” or “being difficult to talk to” and a host of other broad-brush criticisms. All I can do is smile a little, say nothing, and be amused by the fact they really don’t understand us either.
Today was a perfect example. I was asked along on one of her famous shopping excursions so I prepared as I always do. I packed my e-reader, one book, and my camera. This is the basic survival equipment required for these short local shopping trips. I also have several other necessities I require for extended shopping trips that last more than three hours including but not limited to binoculars, a back scratcher, a pillow, and a a warm fuzzy blanket. Being a former Boy Scout I’m still a big believer in the motto, “Be Prepared”. I need these things to keep me comfortable as I wait in the car in front of every Kohl’s, Target, Michael’s, and Wal-Mart. The alternative is go in and push a cart around for a mile or two and idiot watch. Do I get any credit for just keeping her company? A big no. It’s always something like “you men, you never want to be with us. You just sit in the car and play with your toys”. How’s that for gratitude? I’ll have you know anything I own that cost me more than $400.00 is no freaking toy. Sorry, it just had to be said but unfortunately only the men are listening.
I have a few other issues with women but no one seems to pay much attention to my thoughts and conclusions. Simple stuff, like why does it take fifteen minutes to pull a car into the garage and get out. I’ve timed my better-half many times and it’s never takes her less than ten minutes. Gotta check the hair and the makeup (for some reason), then she goes through her bags (always carrying at least two), checks the back seat, glove compartment , and possibly her pulse and blood pressure as well. Do I loudly criticize her for these things? Not anymore. I gave up even mentioning them years ago because it was a waste of time. It goes in one ear and directly out the other.
What are my conclusions. I have none. But as a human male who is a long standing member of the Men’s union and a continuing target for female criticisms (valid or otherwise), I’ll keep trying to make sense of it all.
A few juicy wisecracks immediately come to mind but today I’ll ne nice. I won’t use them except in my own defense if she starts getting feisty when she can’t find clothes that will fit. I’ll do my best to convince her it’s not the fault of all the men in the world that she can’t fit her ass into a pair of jeans. I guarantee you she won’t believe a word of it.
This is what I would call a text book example of what a women would consider a normal relationship. They talk and we listen, just perfect.
Please, can someone explain to me just how I can go about getting "writers block". It seems the only way I’ll be able to get some rest is if I can’t write anything at all. Slowly over a period of time starting about three years ago my mind went into overdrive. Now I find myself waking up in the middle of the night, sometimes more than once, with ideas demanding my attention.
At first I would get up, grab some coffee, sit at the computer, write out a quick draft, and then return to bed. That got old very quickly so I decided to keep a notepad next to the bed. I could then just roll over and jot down notes without getting up at all. That sucked almost immediately when I had difficulty reading my half-asleep handwriting. Finally I purchased a small handheld recorder which didn’t work either. My recordings were so bad I sounded like I had a mouthful of rocks. Scratch that idea.
Well guess what I’m doing now. Since I refuse to get up and get on the computer and I can’t write or record anything I understand, I’ve been stricken with an annoying case of insomnia. I’ve experienced a number of things over the years that were unpleasant but this is by far the worst. I’m awakened from a dead sleep and begin to recite to myself the thing that so rudely woke me up.
I’ve since tried dropping a couple of Tylenol PM’s before bed which helps me get to sleep but not to stay asleep. I tried alcohol but unfortunately for me it’s more of a stimulant than a sleep aid. It’s driving me just a little bit crazy of late because the only time I seem to get any sound sleep is in mid-afternoon for no more than twenty minutes at a time.
Another side effect which my better-half has mentioned on a number of occasions is that it’s making me just a bit cranky. My normal fun loving self has slowly morphed into a newer and more sarcastic Don Rickles. I’ve been told in no uncertain terms that this crap has to stop. I cleaned up the actual language she used because this is supposed to be a "G" rated blog and I understand how sensitive some of you are. The point she’s trying to make is that the more screwed up my sleep is the more miserable, unfriendly, and argumentative I’ve become.
I’m hoping these problems soon rectify themselves with the beginning of Spring, warmer weather, and increased physical activity. If they don’t I could be in big trouble.
Each morning I try to write the drafts of my blog postings while relaxing in bed and at the same time keeping up with current events on TV. One thing that irritates me even more than the never-ending infomercials for products is the never-ending religious infomercials by a bunch so called preachers. How stupid do you have to be to believe that someone requires a half-hour long infomercial to save your soul. It’s for the effing money you fools.
Over the years and after a great deal of collecting and reading all types of information I’ve come to the conclusion that organized religion as we know it hasn’t convinced me of anything except to remain totally skeptical. To quote a comedian with a wicked sense of humor, "I have no problem with a universal deity but I do have a problem believing in one that takes attendance". It’s nothing more than an attempt to be funny but it’s simple thoughts like that that cause a person like me to think.
I’ve tried for many years to read as much about as many religions as I could and gotten nowhere fast. The mere fact that there are so many religions bothers me the most. It’s my opinion and belief that if there is only one God, with one basic message, then there should only be one religion. Man-made religions with miracles and visions and other assorted nonsense leave me cold. They continue to be more a source of amusement for me than anything I can take too seriously. That being said, I am a big believer in the natural order of things. Science is not a religion to me but scientific studies have convinced me that the natural order of all things will remain as fact long after most religions have crumbled into dust and been forgotten.
One thing that sticks with me throughout all of my attempts to believe in something supernatural or godlike is the term "karma". As stated by Isaac Newton’s Third Law, "For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction". It’s simple and basic and believable. You can call it "karma" or use any term you’d like. The term isn’t important but the facts of the matter will always remain constant. I’d like to believe that in the grand scheme of things there is a power that helps maintain a balance in all things. It just the old and overused biblical quote of "an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth" taken to it’s logical conclusion. You treat me well and I’ll return the favor. If you do good, it will come back to you ten fold and as a balance if you do evil it will revisit you as well.
Two of my favorite sayings have always been; "what goes around, comes around" and "always do the right thing, no matter the consequences". To me they seem to say the same basic thing. It’s not a religion but good old common sense. Do we really need every common sense thing reiterated and interpreted by human prophets who are no more intelligent than most of us already are? I think not. As in everything else, when humans get involved things get twisted, misinterpreted, and turned into issues of money, power and control.
I try to live my life with my own self-imposed laws of proper behavior without having things dictated to me by other humans claiming they were chosen to deliver these messages by a higher power. I find that offensive and I chose to go my own way. My laws will always be the same, they will never change, or be misinterpreted. When the day comes when I have to answer for my life and my actions, I’ll be ready. Will they?
It’s raining here in Maine this morning and I’m hoping it’s Mother Nature’s last and final gasp of the winter. Listening to the weather forecasts for the last few days was too depressing for words. They were calling for sleet and a few inches of snow this morning but thankfully they were mistaken. A light coating of sleet that melted away almost immediately is something I can live with.
My better-half was up early to deliver her son to the bus station. He visited us for three days but now is on his way to somewhere in NY state for the wedding of one of his friends and then back to Los Angeles.
I was wondering to myself before his arrival just how he’d react to the new grand baby. It was fun watching the transformation from being my better-half’s son to the uncle of his younger sister’s baby boy. Babies have that special ability to take you out of yourself and your everyday worries and to really enjoy the moment you’re having with them. He was totally disarmed by the whole experience and found himself swept away by the baby and the new relationship they had begun to build. It showed a side of him I’d never seen before and I was glad to see it emerge. He was able to spend a lot of time with the baby and the bond between them was strongly made.
Things should quickly get back to what we call normal around here. Getting ready for Spring and the garden are at the top of our To Do List for the next few weeks. I’ll be off to Lowes to purchase paint and primer this week and hopefully the new room will done by midweek next week. If I time things just right I should be able to put the finishing touches to the room and then immediately move outside and get busy with the yard cleanup and garden prep.
We’ve already started talking about a few weekend photography trips to the northern part of the state. The Attagash region is a few hours north of here and is truly a beautiful place to visit. Hundreds of lakes, small and large, surrounded by thick and dense forests. Wildlife is plentiful with a million opportunities for excellent photographs. I love getting away from all the trouble with the economy, politics, TV, talking heads, cell phones, and any other BS you can think of. Peace, quiet, wilderness, and calm. It beats any kind of drug you can find anywhere.
I’ve been watching and listening to the the President and his minions for years now. I’ve discredited him when I could and attempted to convince anyone who would listen to not give him their vote. To those of you who refuse to see the truth then you’re obvious one of the Obama’s loyal “Kool-Aid” drinkers. My response is for everyone to listen to our pass presidents for guidance and help in these perilous times. Listen up!
“It will be worthy of a free, enlightened, and, at no distant period, a great nation, to give to mankind the magnanimous and too novel example of a People always guided by an exalted justice and benevolence.”
George Washington – Farewell Address 1796
“I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just; that his justice cannot sleep forever.”
Thomas Jefferson 1785
“The American people will ever do well if well done by.”
Abraham Lincoln 1860
“The strength of our Nation must continue to be used in the interest of all our people rather than a privileged few. It must continue to be used unselfishly in the struggle for world peace and the betterment of mankind.”
Harry S. Truman – State of the Union Jan 1949
“Whatever America hopes to bring to pass in the world must first come to pass in the heart of America.”
Dwight D. Eisenhower – First Inaugural Address 1953
“America is a great nation today not because of what government did for people but because of what people did for themselves and one another.”
Richard M. Nixon – Beyond Peace 1994
“All great change in America begins at the dinner table.”
Ronald Reagan – Farewell Address Jan 1989
“America is never wholly herself unless she is engaged in high moral principle. We as a people have a purpose today. It is to make kinder the face of the nation and gentler the face of the world.”
George Bush – Inaugural Address 1989
On a more happier note I’d like to welcome aboard some new followers to this blog. Take a few minutes and check out their blogs as I regularly do. The diversity of the WordPress community is amazing, informative. and endless. Welcome!
Food 4 the Soul 93, sammykrish994, Valeriu D. G. Barbu, prophetbrahmarishi, Joe Warnimont, rnwdgaf, Guerrilla Graffiti Magazine, Book Hub Inc, dasitton309, sipoffashion, spygarden, kirstywirsty, and more-sprinkles.
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