I’ve written many postings about the Christmas season over the years and as I recently read back through them, they appeared varied, somewhat interesting, and some even boring. I hate to admit that I was ever boring but there are times when Christmas can be a huge pain in the butt. I just don’t get the “buzz” like I did when I was a kid and it still amazes me that some people (without kids) turn into Christmas fanatics and go wild over it. I loved Christmas as a young child but each year I lost a little of the holiday magic everyone seems to be searching for. It saddens me a little but “it is what it is”. The only real enjoyment for me now is when the young grandchildren are running through the house wearing Christmas apparel and having a grand old time. I thoroughly enjoy living vicariously through them.
After my last two years of medical problems, I didn’t feel things would ever be getting any better. The years, 2019 and 2020, drained away what little fun I had left in me. If not for my better-half and a few other close family members I might not have survived to enjoy Christmas 2021, for that I am eternally grateful.
All of that being said, it’s time to prepare for the holidays once again. With the pandemic still gumming up the works I’m not sure what direction to take. Now that I’m cancer free you’d think I’d be ready to celebrate the hell out of just about anything. After the experiences of the last two years I’ve entered a phase in my life that was totally unexpected. I’ve become calmer, more thoughtful, and seriously introspective.
The grandchildren are no longer toddlers and are becoming actual people. They now can speak their minds and voice their feelings like never before. While I find that refreshing it makes my preparations for the holiday a little more troublesome. My education continues but now they are the teachers and I’m the student.
I now know more about Pokémon and the thousands of cards involved with that experience. It’s supposed to be a game but I have no idea what the rules are. I think he’s just messing with me because he seems to win every game. Which cards are rare and which ones are crappy, who knows?
I’ve seen the Alvin & the Chipmunks movie a hundred times and have been hearing that theme song in my head for five years. I find myself humming it at the oddest times, in the shower and while I’m cutting grass. Don’t even get me started about “Lady and the Tramp”.
I’ll bet you any amount of money that I know more about the cartoon “Larva” than anyone you know over the age of 15. I actually found myself purchasing a “Larva” tee shirt three years ago that the grandson wanted to give to his grandmother. Apparently, it was a bigger hit than I anticipated since she still wears it occasionally in odd moments.
I’ve also been coerced into becoming a soccer fan. I’ve hated soccer with a passion and have avoided it for most of my life. Not anymore unfortunately. Both grandsons have decided that soccer is a great game but it’s always much more fun when family members come to the games to cheer them on. So, my newest job is the official family sports photographer. I get to sit and watch groups of five-six-seven-eight-year-old boys and girls playing “at” soccer. Just shoot me now. It’s finally improving this year since they’ve added a real game to their curriculum, baseball. This I actually enjoy watching.
I guess I should be happy. Those boys have enough energy for us all and I think it’s rubbing off on me a little. They now have me looking forward to a Christmas I wasn’t sure I’d ever get to celebrate.
I thought we should post a little trivia today about our friends in the animal kingdom. As weird as people can be animals are way worse. Read and be enlightened.
A bird has to fly at a minimum speed of 11 miles per hour to be able to keep itself aloft.
More than 1000 birds a year die from smashing into windows.
Baby robins eat 14 feet of earthworms a day.
A whales penis is called a dork.
A humpback whales milk is 54% fat.
If the eggs spawned by all the female cod in one season survived, they would fill the oceans from seabed to surface. Cod lay between four and 5 million eggs at a time – but usually only about five survive.
Crocodiles cannot stick their tongues out.
Most elephants weigh less than the tongue of the blue whale.
Neither horses nor rabbits can vomit.
A rat can survive longer without water than a camel.
It is illegal in Alaska to give a moose an alcoholic drink.
A pig always sleeps on its right side.
A lion’s roar can be heard from 5 miles away.
Human birth control pills work on gorillas.
A cat has four rows of whiskers.
The pet ferret was domesticated more than 500 years before the house cat.
Twelve or more cows are known as a flink.
Everything you ever wanted to know about animal trivia. There’s a lot more available and you can be sure I’ll be posting it in the future.
Celebrities are once again the subject of a post. I’m still amazed at how many people in this country live and die or gossip about celebrities. I suppose the quotation “get a life” no longer has much meaning. If I wanted to bore you by listing celebrities who died young from drug overdoses, plane crashes, or sheer stupidity, I’d be here writing forever. Today’s topic is the amount of death that seems to follow celebrities on a regular basis. There are times when being around a celebrity is also life-threatening as you’ll see as you review this list of interesting facts and how dangerous it can be as a hanger-on. Here we go . . .
In 2003 a rapper named Big Lurch was convicted of the murder and partial consumption of his roommate while under the influence of PCP.
In 1978, Oscar-winning actor Gig Young shot his fourth wife to death in their New York City apartment and then turned the gun on himself.
In 2001 actress Rebecca Gayheart struck and killed a nine-year-old pedestrian with her car in Los Angeles. She pled no contest to vehicular manslaughter and was sentenced to three years probation and a fine
In 1963, future first lady Laura Welsh Bush ran a stop sign and accidentally crashed her car into the vehicle of a 17-year-old man, killing him.
In 1936, eccentric billionaire-to-be Howard Hughes struck and killed a pedestrian in Los Angeles.
In 1984, Motley Crue lead singer Vince Neil was arrested for drunk driving and vehicular manslaughter after he crashed into an oncoming car his passenger was killed and two occupants of the other vehicle were injured.
At age 12, future Illinois governor and presidential candidate Adlai Stevenson shot and killed a 16-year-old girl when his gun went off accidentally.
Boxing promoter Don King killed two people. One murder was ruled justifiable because King was being robbed at the time. He spent four years in prison for the stomping death of a second man.
In 1978 punk rocker Sid vicious of the group, Sex Pistols, stabbed to death his girlfriend, Nancy Spungen, Vicious died of a heroin overdose before he could be brought to trial.
In 2009, famed record producer Phil Spector was convicted of the murder of Alanna Clarkson. He is currently serving a prison term of 19 years to life.
In 2002 a wrapper C-Murder, a.k.a. Cory Miller, was found guilty for beating and shooting a 16-year-old boy who had allegedly embarrassed Miller during a club’s rap contest.
In 1987, actor Matthew Broderick killed two women in Northern Ireland when his car veered into the oncoming lane.
In 1951 writer William S Burroughs shot and killed his common-law wife, Joan Vollmer. He claimed he was trying to shoot a glass off of Vollmer’s head and missed. He was found guilty of manslaughter and sentenced to two years but only served two weeks behind bars.
In 1927 Tony award-winning actor Paul Kelly spent more than two years in prison after beating another man to death with a club. Kelly later married the dead man’s widow.
In 1970 Keith Moon, the late drummer of The Who, accidentally ran over and killed his bodyguard while fleeing attackers. Moon was not charged.
I could go on and on but there’ve been so many others it would take forever to list them all but my point has been made. If you’re going to idolize and worship the never-ending supply of celebrities and those who are seeking their 15 min. of fame, do it from a distance. It’s much safer that way.
With Thanksgiving only two days away I thought you might find this little bit of our history appropriate. Being a lover of history has been a source of pleasure for me for many years. I love reading about anything historical especially everything I could find on the United States and how it was created. We’re coming up on one of my most favorite holidays, Thanksgiving. In my mind it was the only holiday that we had that meant something real to me. People giving thanks for the things in their life that needed to be appreciated and shared with friends and family. To show appreciation for the many good things and good people that have impacted our lives in the last year and before.
I sometimes think how many of our holidays have changed in the eyes of the citizenry. Christmas went from being a religious celebration of the birth of Christ and turned into an insanely greedy holiday about gifts and presents. Thanksgiving always meant much more to me than any holiday for all of the best reasons. Time with family and friends that was hard to come by most of the year. When Thanksgiving came everyone showed up regardless of any interruptions from outside influences like work and business. It was quality time for me and mine which was sorely lacking most of the year. It was time to eat grandma’s special gravy of which she never gave anyone that recipe. It was the goal of all of the younger generations to somehow convince her to give that up but the old girl took it to her grave except for a few hints she gave me. I make a one helluva gravy but it’s still not as good as hers.
These days Thanksgiving is just a prelude to shopping. I’d like to meet the guy that came up with the Black Friday nonsense and beat him senseless. I hate to say this but there might be one plus coming out of this pandemic and that is the hope that Thanksgiving will return to what it was in years past. Most of the younger generations now know little or nothing about the history of how Thanksgiving became Thanksgiving and all of the people that suffered and died to make the first one happen. I’m finishing this post with three letters written by a young lady named Lizzy to her aunt Constance. The first letter was written during the crossing from England to Plymouth on the Mayflower, the second is about her arrival and the setup of the colony, and the third is concerning the first Thanksgiving celebration with the local Indians. Put yourself in her place as you read these letters and show or read them to your children or grandchildren. It’ll give all of you a better understanding and perspective on what it actually means to be thankful for something. I hope you enjoy them.
LETTER #1
Dearest Aunt Constance,
You wondered what life in a ship would be like. I can now tell you, I would trade my bed for yours in the beat of a heart! I sleep on a damp bed in a tiny cabin with mother and father. We are all packed in like so much cargo below deck. We do not know many of the other passengers, yet we live nearly on top of each other. Few of us have ever been aboard a ship, and there is much seasickness. The stench is most awful! I welcome the times when we are allowed to go on deck to empty our chamber pots and breathe the fresh air.
When the weather is fair, the days are much the same. We pray as we rise in the morning and before and after we take our meals. For food we commonly have pease or bean pottage, cheese and ship’s biscuit. For drink, we have beer. We have some water but they say it will soon go bad.
Did I tell you that I have a friend? Her name is Mary and I am so grateful for her. Mary and I play games, tell riddles, sing or just speak to each other. It is often too dark to even read. There are few other lasses on the ship since most families left their daughters behind until our town is built. The sailors will sometimes allow us on deck, but they are a hard lot and frighten me somewhat. Master Goodman brought his two dogs—a mastiff and a spaniel—and we chase them as they chase the mousers that chase the rats. Have I made mention of the rats? They are almost as great in size as the mousers!
May the Lord help us when the weather is not fair. Father told me that sailors usually seek safe harbor in the autumn and now I know why. The storms are fearsome! They roll and toss our poor ship which creaks and moans as though it will break apart. My arms and legs are bruised from being thrown about and having things fall on me. In one storm, a young man was thrown into the sea, but by God’s good will he caught hold of a line that was dragging in the water and was saved. Just a fortnight ago came the worst storm yet. Aunt Constance, I thought we would all surely drown and become food for the fishes. The ship’s upper works were leaking and of a sudden there was a great snap! Master Carver told us that one of the ship’s main beams had cracked. Many of the crew wanted to turn back, but after much consultation, t’was decided that we would continue . The carpenters and sailors mended the beam and caulked the leaks.
Thus we put our faith in God and we press on. I do not think that I can stand such a fright again. I pray that we reach the New World soon.
Your loving niece,
Lizzy
LETTER #2
Dearest Aunt Constance,
I was so grateful to arrive in the New World, but I am now beginning to wish that we had never left home. I know that father had a hard life in England because he was punished for following his conscience and worshipping in the Separatist Church, but I wonder if it could have been as hard as this.
We arrived here just as winter did. It is bitter cold and snow is almost always upon the ground, but God has blessed us with a place to start our new town. There is a fair brook running under a high hill that Father says will offer us protection from our enemies. The men have begun building houses on land, but we must remain on the ship until they are nearer to being finished. I never thought I would still be aboard the ship for so long after we arrived! I suppose it is safer on the ship. I know not what to think of the naturals of this place that are called Indians. The first time some of our men encountered them, there was a fight though by God’s blessing no one was injured. We are on our guard now.
Master Goodman—the one with the dogs—has become quite ill. He was out cutting thatch with Peter Brown when his dogs chased a great deer deep into the forest. They chased after them and were soon lost, and had to pass the night in the wilderness. When they found their way back the next afternoon, Master Goodman had to have his shoes cut off his feet as they were so swollen with the cold. Many of our party have already died, among them Mary’s mother and father. I cannot think how lost I would be in this strange and frightful place without mother and father. I pray that they will not succumb to scurvy and other diseases. I mean not to be so grim, but I fear that things could get far worse. We are near to scraping the bottoms of the barrels of rice, peas, and biscuit, and the men have had little fortune in hunting. I am worried, though I know that with God’s help we will survive this dark winter.
Your loving niece,
Lizzy
LETTER #3
Dearest Aunt Constance,
Pray forgive me for being so long between letters. After the great sickness it seemed that there was little good to write about. By the time spring arrived, nearly half of our number had died. Twas truly a mournful time. Since then we have continued to build houses and have planted our gardens and many acres of our English corns. In time, I think we may come to prosper here. We have even begun to grow a curious corn that we call Indian corn or turkey wheat.
How we learned to grow this Indian corn was most unexpected. Last spring a tall Indian walked into our town, causing great alarm. To our great astonishment, he spoke in our tongue, saying “Welcome Englishmen.” He told us that his name was Samoset and that he had learned English from fishermen to the north of here. Samoset returned the next day with Tisquantum, whose English was as fine as yours and mine. Tisquantum told us how his people used to live where we now live, but that a few years before we arrived a plague had come and wiped out the town. He has been a great blessing to us, showing us how to grow Indian corn in mounds. He even told us to put herring in the ground to make the corn grow better. It works as well as using manure and our harvest was quite fine. Tisquantum also showed us how to fish and the best places to hunt. I fear that we would not have survived here were it not for the help of Tisquantum and others.
To celebrate our first harvest our Governor, Master Bradford, called for a celebration. Four men went hunting wild fowl and brought back enough geese, ducks and other birds to last nearly a week! We ate, played at games, and the men practiced shooting their muskets. The Indians came amongst us as well, among them their greatest King Massasoit and more than 90 men! I was most frightened at first, but they stayed for three days and we entertained and feasted them. And they went out and brought us five deer. While they were here I even saw some of their children! One boy, father says he thinks that his name is Po-met-a-comet, threw a ball to me. Of course he could not speak English and I could not speak the Indian tongue.
And now we have a new ship in the harbor! It is wonderful that we have new folk to settle here, but I fear that our harvest, which seemed plentiful enough, will not be enough for all of us and the newcomers. Father says that we will fill this ship full of timber and furs to send back to England. Perhaps on the next ship they will send over cows!
Dearest Aunt Constance, I truly hope that you will come to join us in New Plimoth. I pray that soon we will be a thriving town.
Now that Thanksgiving has come and gone it’s time for a few days of respite before the Christmas holiday kicks in. Just 28 more shopping days, Yikes! Today is as good a day as any for some self-reflection. Back on 11/07 I posted twenty questions designed to help a person reveal interesting things about themselves. I answered them as truthfully as I could as an example and thoroughly enjoyed the self-analyses that it caused. This post is just a continuation of that exercise with fifteen more questions. My answers as always are truthful and will make for some interesting discussions with my better-half and others. Hope you will do the same. Have fun with it . . .
What are your most compulsive habits? Do you regularly struggle to break these habits? My compulsions are neatness and organization. I never struggle with them, I embrace them.
Knowing that you had a 50% of winning and would be paid 10 times the amount of your bet if you won, what fraction of what you now own would you be willing to wager? None, I only bet on sure things.
At a meal, your friends start belittling a common acquaintance. If you felt their criticisms were unjustified, would you defend the person? Absolutely!
Do you usually make a special effort to thank someone who does you a favor? How do you react when you aren’t thanked for going out of your way for someone? I make the effort to be polite but if others choose not to it’s not my problem. But I’ll certainly remember who was polite and who wasn’t.
Since adolescence, in what 3 year period do you feel you experienced the most personal growth and change? My three years in the Army.
If you were having difficulty on an important test and could safely cheat by looking at someone else’s paper, would you do so? No way.
If you were at a friend’s house for Thanksgiving dinner and you found a dead cockroach in your salad, what would you do? Using humor, I would let the hosts know without embarrassing them.
If you were you able to wake up tomorrow in the body of someone else, would you do so? Whom would you pick? I’m fine with things, both good and bad, as they are.
If you went to a beach and it turned out to be a nude beach, would you stay and go swimming? Would you swim nude? I love being naked therefore I’d be swimming and nude.
If you knew your child would be severely retarded and would die by the age of five, would you decide to have an abortion? No.
What if anything is too serious to be joked about? Deaths of children under any circumstances.
You notice a self-destructive behavior pattern in a friend who is clearly unaware of it. Would you point it out? Yes, as quickly as possible.
If you could increase your I.Q. by forty points by having an ugly scar stretching from your mouth to your eye, would you do so? Yes, facial scars can be sexy.
If you decided to do something and your friends strongly advised you not to, would you do it anyway? Almost always.
What do you most strive for in your life: accomplishment, security, love, power, excitement, knowledge or something else? Creativity,Excitement, Love, and then Knowledge.
Well, that was interesting. The next series of questions appear to be much more complex and I’ll be posting them in a few weeks once I figure out what my answers will be.
With just 33 shopping days left till Christmas, I thought I’d start the season off with a few facts about the list we are all familiar with, “The Twelve Days of Christmas’. This information was in part sourced from the Cumbrian Church newsletter.
Catholics in England during the period 1558-1839 were prohibited by law from any practice of their faith, public or otherwise. According to a popular urban myth, “The Twelve Days of Christmas” was written as a catechism song to help young Catholics memorize the tenets of their faith and avoid being caught with anything in writing. They found a sneaky way to put Christ back into Christmas.
The True Love referred to God himself, the Me to every baptized person. The Partridge in a Pear Tree is Jesus Christ the Son of God. In the song, Christ is symbolically presented as a mother partridge which feigns injury to decoy predators from her helpless nestlings, an expression of Christ’s sadness over the fate of Jerusalem.
The Two Turtle Doves are the Old and the New Testaments.
The Three French Hens are Faith, Hope, and Charity, the theological virtues.
The Four Calling Birds are the four Gospels and/or the four Evangelists.
The Five Golden Rings are the first five books of the Old Testament, which gave the history of “man’s” fall from grace.
The Six Geese a’Laying are the six days of Creation.
The Seven Swans a’Swimming are the seven gifts of the Holy Spirit, the seven sacraments.
The Eight Maids a’Milking are the eight beatitudes.
The Nine Ladies Dancing are the nine fruits of the Holy Spirit.
The Ten Lords a’Leaping are the Ten Commandments.
The Eleven Pipers Piping are the eleven faithful apostles.
The Twelve Drummers Drumming are the twelve points of doctrine of the Apostles Creed.
This is the result of living and worshiping in a country with little or no religious freedom. The English of the time were more than a little intolerant of just about everything and everybody. Be glad you weren’t there.
I am a proud citizen of the great state of Maine. I’ve lived here now for 21 years and it’s even more interesting than you might think. As in every other state in the United States, Maine has its peculiarities. Some people may think they’re stupid and others might consider them quaint but that’s just an individual’s judgment call. The state of Maine has been around a long time and has many laws on the books that are absolutely ridiculous. Fortunately most of the ones I’m going to introduce you to now are not enforced. Thank god.
In Maine, it’s illegal to step out of an airplane once it’s in flight.
In Maine you will be fined if your holiday lights are left up any later than January 14.
In Augusta, it is illegal to walk down the street playing the violin.
In Freeport, don’t you dare “expectorate” out of any second story window.
In Wells, Maine, you may not place an advertisement in the cemetery.
In Maine, it is illegal to keep an armadillo as a pet.
In Waterville, it’s illegal to blow your nose in public.
In Portland, you better not use a feather duster to tickle under the chin of a woman.
In Rumford, it is illegal to bite a landlord under any circumstances.
In Portland, shoe laces must be tied when walking down the street.
In Hollowell, it is illegal to park your horse “up wind” on a windy day.
In South Berwick, it is illegal to park in front of Dunkin’ Donuts.
In Waterboro, dog leashes may not be over 8 feet in length.
So much for their host of stupid laws, let’s look now at what some Mainers consider tourist attractions. Who am I to dispute these kind of crazy claims. If nothing else these tourist attractions are worth a few yucks.
Maine experiences the first sunrise in the US, you should go to Mars Hill, Cadillac Mountain, or Lubek to properly start your day..
Maine is the closest state to Africa.
A giant boot outside L.L. Bean in Freeport, Maine is a size 400 (Extra Wide).
On US Route 1, 7 miles south of the intersection with US Route 2 in Houlton, you’ll find a tree decked out with pairs of hanging shoes.
The world’s largest Paul Bunyan statue is a roadside attraction in Bangor, Maine.
On Peaks Island, there is an entire museum devoted to umbrella covers.
Well, I think that’s enough excitement for me for a while. You should rush right out and make reservations to come to this glorious state next summer to seek out these incredibly silly tourist attractions. Having that much fun could be hazardous to your health.
Lobsters, Lighthouses, Scenic Shorelines, and one small Amusement Park
