05-14-2015 Journal- Family Gardening!   Leave a comment

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I love the Spring of the year.  It rejuvenates me like no other season can.  I can’t wait to get out of bed in the morning, go outside in the garden, and just mellow out.  I’m sorry if I sound a little like a hippie or a New Ager but it can’t be helped. 

With the better-half still out of town I decided to get as much done as possible with the garden before she returns home.  I traveled a few miles down the road to my favorite nursery yesterday.  It’s rather small and family run but the plants and seedlings I purchase there always seem to do better than the stuff the big box stores are peddling.  This small nursery takes a great deal of pride in supplying their customers with the healthiest and happiest plants they possibly can.

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I arrived at the nursery the day after Mother’s Day and the place was cleaned out.  The staff was busily restocking the greenhouses and repotting seedlings as fast as they could.  The owner who’s become a friend of sorts over the years told me that this Mother’s Day weekend was the best weekend they’ve had since opening the nursery almost fifteen years ago.  I love hearing things like that. It seems people are once again finding a home garden something they want to do and do properly.

I can thank my parents for my interest in gardening.  My late Mother was really into growing a large assortment of flowers and her knowledge of herbs was amazing.  She passed that knowledge on to me and I  thank her everyday.  To me she’s always seems to be hanging around my garden talking with the plants and checking things out as she always did. 

My Dad was more into growing vegetables and I picked up a lot of information and tips from him over the years as well.  He also educated me on the proper curse words to use when describing deer, groundhogs, and rabbits.  His war with them was epic and never-ending and it gave the rest of the family a lot of laughs over the years.  Just as a point of fact, he never won that war.

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‘Culpeper’s Complete Herbal’

This is my favorite book on herbs.  I’ve had my old copy for more than thirty years and for me it’s a real connection to the past.  Some of the information is outdated but in it’s day it was the ultimate source for herbal facts and remedies.

I purchased a few dozen marigolds yesterday that I intend to plant around the perimeter of the garden. They seem to magically keep the deer and other pests away and it something we’ve done for years.  Many of my neighbors complain constantly every summer about the wildlife that comes to visit and damage their gardens. I’m not sure just why marigolds keep them away but they do. I’ve been told it has something to do with their  fragrance but who really knows?

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Tomorrow my garden work continues with a general clean up but I won’t be planting anything else for at least the next two weeks. The fear of a hard frost  remains a real possibility until sometime after Memorial Day.

I can’t wait to get up and get going.

05-12-2015 Journal–Trivial Pursuits!   Leave a comment

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I think it’s time for another installment of what this blog is all about,  everyuselessthing. It’s a few of those less than important facts you’ve never known you wanted to know. I have a lot more free time this week since my better-half left Maine for vacation in Delaware. Why Delaware? Who knows, maybe she’s attracted to the second-rate beaches and the throngs of uninteresting people.  Things are beautifully quiet here and my time is my own at least for the next four days. The cat and I have settled in rather easily as two lone bachelors.

So lets kick this off right now with a load of these odd, weird, and true facts.

Enjoy.

  • Dean Martin, born Dino Crocetti, boxed under the name Kid Crochet as a teenager.
  • A fully mature oak tree sheds around seven hundred thousand leaves every year.
  • Banging your head against the wall burns 150 calories an hour.
  • The storage capacity of the human brain exceeds four terrabytes.
  • The average talker sprays about three hundred microscopic saliva drops per minute – about two and a half droplets per word.

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Not bored yet?  Keep reading, I’m not nearly finished.

  • Societies in ancient Rome, Germany, and China used urine as a mouthwash.
  • It takes only seven pounds of pressure to rip off your ear.
  • The world’s termites outweigh the world’s humans by ten to one.
  • An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain.
  • The par for the world’s largest golf hole – the 909 yard seventh hole on Japan’s Sano golf course – is seven.

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Now lets look into the wonderful and delicious world of food.

  • Miss Piggy once said, “Never eat more than you can lift.”
  • Almonds are members of the peach family.
  • Pepper is the top selling spice in the world. The second is mustard.
  • Bombay Duck is actually dry, salted fish.
  • Tic Tac’s contain carnauba wax. The same ingredient found in car polishes.

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And last but not least a few sexual tidbits.

  • Humans spend two years of their lives making love.
  • Four pope’s died while participating in sexual acts.
  • Every year more than eleven thousand Americans hurt themselves trying out bizarre sexual positions.
  • A real orgasm is said to burn 112 calories. A fake orgasm is said to burn off 315 calories.
  • On average it takes two tablespoons of blood to make a man’s penis erect.

Do you feel any smarter than you did a few minutes ago?  If you do then I suspect you’re delusional or just kidding yourself.  It’s called useless information for a reason and it will have no redeeming social value whatsoever.

I’m almost sorry about that but not quite.

05-10-2015 Journal–Herbs, Herbs & More Herbs!   Leave a comment

The excellent weather will be ending tonight if the forecasters are accurate so I’ve been scrambling to get a few things done before the rains arrive.  The second wave of plantings were finished yesterday.  I spent some time removing a few dead plants from the herb garden and then replanted twelve others.  I put in extra parsley and basil plants and after drying in the Fall we should have enough to last the winter.

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‘Lots of Oregano’

I replanted all of my Sage plants because for some unknown reason they all died.  I hate losing plants that I’ve had for years but there isn’t much I can do about it.  I really thought the heavy snow cover for most of last winter would’ve helped keep them healthy and happy.  As usual it appears the apple-mint, spearmint, peppermint, catnip, and oregano will be huge.  In just the last few weeks those plants have grown four inches and are spreading everywhere.

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‘More Basil’

The new mower arrived last evening and I spent this morning going over all of the equipment and controls.  I finally fired it up and spent an hour learning to operate the machine. It’s much smaller than my last tractor but it cuts very well and is easy to steer around the many obstacles on the property.  Next week I’ll pass the older tractor over to my step daughter’s husband. They should with a little TLC be able to use it for a few more years and possibly even longer.

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‘We Always Need Rosemary’

Next week with the better-half out of town I’ll begin purchasing the next batch of plants and place them into the cold frames.  Cherry tomatoes, jalapeño peppers, cucumbers, and pea pods lead the list.  Just after Memorial Day I’ll get everything else planted as quickly as possible. Then it’ll be time to retire to the deck to relax and watch things grow for a month or two.

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‘There Are Chives Everywhere’

I’ll  stock up on some good brandy and a case of Chardonnay and that’ll be my contribution in helping Mother Nature in getting my garden to flourish. 

The sunshine and deck beckon.

05-08-2015 Journal – Beaches, Blankets, Bikinis   Leave a comment

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Yesterday was a day spent enjoying the warm and sunny eighty degree weather. My better-half had the day off and we were able to spend some quality time together just bumming around.

Living in Maine has it’s issues like bad winters and quirky weather patterns but it also has a lot of pluses.  We’re able to visit the White mountains within an hour, the ocean and beaches within a half hour, the  New Hampshire lakes region in one hour, and Boston in two hours.  We also have an abundance of wildlife that we sometimes take for granted.

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As we left our home and traveled less than a mile we observed turkeys roaming around  in a nearby field.  We see turkeys on a regular basis as well as hundreds of seagulls and as many hawks.  People in our rural community that have chickens are well aware of the hawks, coyotes, and foxes. If your chickens are free range or left outside of a fenced area then you can be sure to lose a few to these predators. It’s also possible to lose a small cat or kitten right off your deck if your not careful.

These two pictures were taken less than a mile from our house. This fat old fox was just strolling along the road, crossed right in front of our car, and then stopped to watch us from the woods.  He hung around long enough for me to get these shots.

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With the day being so warm we decided to make our first Spring visit to a local beach.  Maine residents are a hearty folk who hit the beaches as early as possible in the Spring.  We have a need to shake off those winter blues once and for all.  While it was sunny and warm the wind still had a chill to it but it didn’t seem to matter.  A lot of sunbathers were on the beach and even one crazy fool of a wind-surfer.  That water was damn cold but he was having a great time.

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We had an all-around terrific day walking the beach and taking a few pictures. There’s no better way to kick start our Spring and Summer seasons.

05-06-2015 Journal–Spring is in Full Swing!   Leave a comment

Almost a week of beautiful warm weather and I think I’ve made the adjustment quite nicely.  The expensive to run heating system has been shut down until sometime in late October (Yeh!) and my winter wear has been stored for another year. I actually had a weather related orgasm yesterday when the temperature reached eighty degrees for the first time.  I have to admit it was really good for me.

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‘Red Cabbage’

I made a visit to a nearby family run nursery to make the first of many upcoming purchases for this year.  I was looking primarily for lettuces and cabbages which can stand the cold nights we’re still having.  There’s nothing better than strolling through a smoking hot greenhouse.  There are times when shopping at this nursery is like going to Walmart.  You start buying this and that and eventually find it hard to stop.  I wanted to fill my car with plants but my better-half helped keep me under control.

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‘Delicious Rhubarb’

Since we eat a great deal of salads I loaded up with four different types of lettuce.  We should have more than enough to last us until Fall.  Throw in some cherry tomatoes and  a few onions and we’re good to go.  On a whim I purchased and planted twelve purple cabbage plants.  We’ve never tried growing them before but  there’s nothing better than cooked cabbage. I hope they do well.

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‘Assorted Lettuces’

I returned home and couldn’t wait to get planting.  It didn’t take too long as you can see.  The next stage will be the new herbs I purchased.  I picked up a quantity of parsley, sage, basil, and rosemary.  Some of them are annuals that must be replaced each year and a few others that were replacements of ones that didn’t survive the winter.

The remaining herbs that did survive are really starting to sprout and from all appearances I’ll probably be knee deep in oregano this year. 

05-04-2015 Journal–My Not So Exciting Life!   Leave a comment

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‘Owwwww, That Smell”

What do you consider as a day in your life you’d never forget? Is it the day you found a $10.00 bill in a parking lot or is that day you had the best sex of your life? I’m sure that all of us have a few of those memorable days we enjoy looking back on.

Early in my life I decided that the reports of an afterlife were just so much hokum and I needed to approach my life in a manner that reflected that thought.  If this existence was all we’d ever have then I needed to aggressively pursue those things I really desired.  If I didn’t obtain them and experience them now I’d never get another chance.

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I left home for college, then quit college , joined the Army, went to Korea, fell in love, returned to the states, became a cop, got married, hang glided, sky dived, and bungee jumped. Moved to New England, became a businessman, joined Greenpeace, left Greenpeace, started a business, adopted a son and became a long distant cyclist.  Stood on the summit of Mt. Washington in a thunder storm with my hands in the air and a prayer on my lips. Became a pretty decent racquetball player, got divorced,  sold my home and moved to the coast. Bought a house on the water, bought two ferrets, and partied for two years. Lost my job, sold my house, and moved to Maine.  Bought my first digital camera, got a job interviewing criminals, bought another house, met the love of my life, and settled down. 

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Sounds like a pretty strange and wonderful life so let me tell you what I did yesterday. On a damp and crappy day I spent an hour and a half standing in and shoveling compost.  To misquote Robert Duval in the movie Apocalypse Now, "I just love the smell of compost in the morning."  There’s nothing quite like the smell of rotting organic material wafting into your nostrils and making your eyes water.  It’s sticks to your shoes and later in the day you may even find a few small chunks in the folds of your clothing as a further reminder.

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I’m now officially adding that job, COMPOST SHOVELER,  to my endless list of dumb-ass jobs and even dumber-ass accomplishments that continue to keep my life so interesting.  I guarantee I won’t be looking fondly on today’s task in the future but my memories of that smell are permanent.

‘Live Your Life’

05-02-2015 Journal – Flowers, Flowers, Everywhere!   Leave a comment

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I’m standing here shaving this morning and finally noticed just how tanned I’ve become.  The weather has warmed a bit but it’s still cold at night and during the day in the shade. It’s becoming rather annoying but at least I’m getting a good base for my Summer tan.

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Even though I continue to whine about the weather it doesn’t seem to be bothering the plant life all that much.  As you can see by the pictures the plants here in Maine refuse to wait for Summer to arrive.  Flowers are shooting up and blooming everywhere regardless of the cold weather.

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Even the garden wants to get going and right now.  My asparagus patch that I planted early last year has started sprouting which makes me very happy. I can’t eat any of it for another year but it looks as if we’ll have a nice large patch we can harvest from next summer.  There’s nothing better than fresh from the garden asparagus coated with a little butter.

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The rhubarb is coming in nicely and I look forward to harvesting it for the first time this year.  I see strawberry/rhubarb pie and a dozen jars of rhubarb jam in my future. This Fall should be a good all around harvest.

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The cold frames are filled with lettuces and a collection of herbs waiting to be planted.  The lettuce will go in next week and the replacement herbs the week after.  I’m planting a larger patch of parsley than normal because we’ve used up just about everything from last summer.  A lot of basil for making pesto and a number of Rosemary plants too.  We can’t seem to enjoy our meals fully without using fresh herbs whenever possible.

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More yard repairs are needed and a few spots need replanting.  I made the decision to purchase a new lawn tractor this week and I’ll pass my older one over to my step daughter and her husband.  One large headache finally dealt with and now I can go forward to enjoy my Summer.

2015 has already made a great start and it should be a warm and pleasant Summer.   I also see a beach day very very soon.

04-30-2015 Journal – Microsoft Slipping Away!   Leave a comment

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Are you as sick as I am about all of these computer companies who insist on convincing or coercing every person in this country to use "The Cloud"? You can’t seem to buy software of any kind without that gentle shove by the company to convince you to place all of your personal writings, business writings, financials or anything else you can a think of on their version of "The Cloud".

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Is anyone on this earth unaware of the risks we take just by being on the Internet. Viruses appear without notice almost every day or so we’re told by McAfee.  Hackers are constantly breaking into those so-called secure sites and making the lives of us poor morons miserable. They’re costing us a lot of money each year to try and protect ourselves and it seems no matter what big companies do, they can’t protect themselves and our most private information.

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Three times in the last few years I’ve been forced to change my credit and debit cards because someone was buying music or other things with my card numbers in Paris, France, Cleveland, Ohio and Montreal, Canada.  I have those expert security specialists at Home Depot, Hannaford Foods, and Anthem Blue Cross & Blue Shield for making my information available to every hacker and thief who has a computer. I’m easily paying more than $200.00 a year for virus protection of my home computers and even a monthly charge for my freaking telephone.    Do you see where I’m going with this?

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Yesterday I was taken by surprise when Microsoft notified me via Facebook that they were making the MS Word program available for free to users of the IPad. I was thrilled because I’ve been loyal to Microsoft for decades.  It’s only within the last year or so that I’m becoming more and more disappointed with them.  After the X-Box One fiasco that make the device incompatible with a couple of decades of game software I’d already purchased, that was Strike One.  Strike Two was my purchase of a MS Surface tablet.  It crashed within a week of the purchase and with no help from their Tech Support took me a month to figure out how to reset it.  Of course I lost all of my information on it as well.

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Strike Three is this App which might be free but has a lot of strings attached. If you create any documents of any kind you’re forced to save them on the MS “Cloud” called “OneDrive”. There is no option that will allow you to save them just to your tablet.   In my opinion it’s those kind of strong-arm tactics that could get me to walk away from MS entirely.  Oh and by the way, you can take your Office 365 program and stick it where the sun don’t shine.

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Everyone knows and worries about Google becoming too intrusive  when they save every piece of information about us they can get.  I understand now they have access to and save information on virtually every website we visit on the web. People are concerned about Muslim terrorists but compared with Google they’re inconsequential.

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I took steps this year to install my own “Cloud” in my home with no available access from the net.  All of my information and backups are now stored safely out of reach of the online thieves and hackers and controlled only by me. 

So here’s my final thought  for Microsoft.  It’s time to get your collective heads out of your collective asses and get back to being the company we’ve all come to know and trust over the years. Bring Bill Gates back if you must and maybe he can stop you from following down that road right behind Google. 

Since you’ve used up your three strikes, I just deleted your free Word App from my IPad.  I never thought I’d see the day when Microsoft wasn’t leading the technology revolution by taking it in new and exciting directions instead of following along behind others like a lap dog.

04-28-2015 Journal – Good v. Bad Government!   Leave a comment

As much as I’ve tried I’m still unsuccessful in eliminating politics from my long list of topics of conversation on this blog.  To say I’m disgusted would be a huge understatement.  I’m seeing things happening these days in this country that are impossible to believe. On top of that we’re being lead by a President who is an absolute disgrace to both the political system and to the country itself.  The only disappointment greater than his presidency are the millions of people in this country who listened to his BS, bought it hook line and sinker, and voted for him twice.

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‘U . . S . .  A!,    U . . S . . A! ,    U . . S . . A!’

The downfall of any successful enterprise is having an uncaring or uneducated group of people in places of responsibility.  With that thought in mind maybe we should once again listen to the men who helped create this nation instead of ones who are trying to damage it as much as possible. It could take a new generation of intelligent and caring people to undo the damage caused by this man and his administration in a short eight years. The real problem in my mind is an electorate that seems willing to give total control of their lives to a group of elitist fools concerned only with their own wants and desires instead of those of the country. 

I again sincerely apologize for talking about politics on this blog.  Maybe these gentlemen can explain it better than I.

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‘George Washington’

“Precedents are dangerous things; let the rein of government then be braced and held with a steady hand.”

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‘John Adams’

“The most sensible and jealous people are so little attentive to government that there are no instances of resistance until repeated, multiplied oppressions have placed it beyond a doubt that their rulers had formed settled plans to deprive them of it.”

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‘Thomas Jefferson’

“The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not.”

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‘Abraham Lincoln’

“Be with a leader when he is right, stay with him when he is still right, but, leave him when he is wrong.”

Pick the group you want responsible for you and your families future.

04-26-2015 Journal – Gray, Cloudy, and Rainy   Leave a comment

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It’s 6 am and I’m barely awake and I don’t want to get up.  I’m lying here looking out the bedroom window waiting to see if anything in the world is moving yet.  It’s dead quiet with little or no observable breeze. There are no birds, no squirrels, and no fat ugly turkey running around the yard making a racket.  It’s just too quiet for my liking.  My better-half is still sleeping and that light snoring of hers (sarcasm) can’t be considered noise or so she constantly tells me.

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I love the beginnings of Spring and the late days of Fall the most but these interim periods between seasons are the worst.  The Spring transition is always slow in coming when we have nothing but gray skies, cold rain, intermittent sunshine, and a need to stay out of the shade. I can bask in those brief moments of warm sunshine on the deck but if I step into any shaded areas it’s like someone walking across my grave.  A deep cold chill that hits you hard and stays with you way too long. 

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The Fall changeover is similar when you’re sitting on the deck enjoying a warm and sunny Indian Summer day where it’s nice and warm but you can just feel that little bit of Winter in the air. It comes slowly with those giant folds of gray clouds edged in black that slowly roll over the horizon. All of a sudden one morning you’re on the deck and you walk into a patch of shade and that same coldness you felt in the Spring grabs you just for a second. Then everyday you can see the plants slowly browning, the cold dew on everything in the mornings, with the full knowledge that snow is coming soon.  After that you have nothing to look forward to but seven months of a cold and depressing Winter, snow shoveling, black ice, and the occasional slip and fall to bruise your butt and your ego.

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Maybe in another few weeks I’ll be able to pull myself out of this winter/spring funk I’ve gotten into.  I go through this every year and there’s really nothing I can do but deal with it.  I’ll wait patiently for that first really sunny day when I can visit the beach and not feel the need to take my windbreaker "just in case". That may finally convince me that Winter is truly gone.

All that being said, the next few weeks will be hell.  I have absolutely no patience for this never-ending  waiting around for Mother Nature to stop screwing with us.

APRIL SHOWERS BRING MAY FLOWERS, I hope!

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