Limericks are the best. I’ve been reading them for years and writing a great many of my own. My limerick archives go all the way back to 1879. I did discover that posting some of those really old ones requires a bit of a rewrite. Some of the profanities back then were just gratuitous and actually detracted from the overall entertainment value. I may have softened the language a little but they’re still a fun read. Todays selections are related specifically to younger women. Don’t complain to me about the content, the people who wrote these have been dead a very long time.
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A bather whose clothing was strewed
By winds that left her quite nude,
Saw a man come along,
And unless we are wrong
You expected this line to be lewd. (1944)
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A lady athletic and handsome
Got wedged in her sleeping room transom.
When she offered much gold
For release, she was told
That the view was worth more than the ransom. (1944)
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There was a young maid from Madras
Who had a magnificent ass;
Not rounded and pink,
As you’d probably think,
It was gray, had long ears, and ate grass. (1940)
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I’m tempted to post a few of my own limericks but unfortunately they’re very rude and sexual explicit. I may rewrite them someday but not today. Instead I offer up a rather lame poem of mine written about my first sexual experience, to show all of you what a freaking romantic I’m not. LOL
I’ve had the fortune or misfortune to live for almost 8 decades. Each decade had interesting points and just as many that were anything but. The 1950’s and early 1960’s meant very little to me because I was just a kid. Things got much more interesting in the late 1960’s where my real life education began. Free love and marijuana introduced me to a number of interesting things which made my life much more pleasant. The 1970’s introduced me to the work force and a lot of fun disappeared overnight. When the 1980’s arrived things once again became interesting. Todays post is a short quiz concerning the Pop Culture of the 1980’s. Ten questions that should be easy to answer for those of us who survived the decade. Let’s see how you do. As always the answers are below.
1. __________ was one of the musical styles influenced by the 1980’s fashions?
2. The hit show Miami Vice was on what TV network?
3. What year did MTV first go on the air?
4. Other than Levi, what were the cool name-brand jeans in the 80’s?
5. The Afterschool Special appeared on what TV network?
6. __________ was Johnny Carson’s trusty sidekick for entirety of his show?
7. What year did the home video game industry crash?
8. Young people often called their portable cassette players __________ in the 1980’s?
9. __________ and __________ were the star actors on Miami Vice?
10. The Intellivision video game console was made by what company?
Loving the phone!
ANSWERS
Punk; New Wave; Heavy Metal; Rap/Hip Hop; Country, NBC, 1981, Guess, ABC, Ed McMahon, 1983, Boom Box; Ghetto Blaster, Don Johnson & Philip Michael Thomas, Mattel.
(Just for the official record I scored 7 out of 10.)
While I’m not a complete sports fanatic, I remain an ardent NFL Fan. I was born and raised in the Pittsburgh area and my father created a rabid Steeler fan (me) at a very young age. I’ve celebrated in the 70″s when the Steeler’s won four Super bowls and then I moved to Boston. How could I possibly deny the Patriots with Tom Brady at the helm? It’s been a real pleasure to live through the rise and fall of those dynasties. Todays post will test your memory when you attempt to identify these players by their nicknames. As always the answers will be listed below.
Who was known as TheAssassin?
Who was nicknamed Bronco?
Who was known as Crazy Legs?
Who was The Galloping Ghost?
Who besides Deion Sanders was once called Hollywood?
Who was The Toe?
Tom Brady #2 Fav
Who was Broadway Joe?
Who was nicknamed Night Train?
Who was Tombstone?
Who was called White Shoes?
Who was known as The Alabama Antelope?
Who was The Flying Dutchman?
Baker Mayfield #3 Fav
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GO STEELERS
GO PATRIOTS
GO BUCS
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ANSWERS
Jack Tatum, Bronislau Nagurski, Elroy Hirsch, Harold “Red” Grange, Tom Henderson, Joe Namath, Dick Lane, Rich Jackson, Billy Johnson, Don Huston, Steve Van Buren, Lou Groza.
Here is a list of trivial items you’ve always wished you knew.
You could swim through the veins of a blue whale.
The white-throated snapping turtle of Australia breathes through it butt.
In order for Earth to become a black hole, its entire mass would have to be compressed into a space less than 1 inch in diameter.
In 1929, the famous television dog Rin-Tin-Tin received the most votes for the Academy Award for best actor but didn’t win.
The leading role in the movie Forest Gump, was originally offered to John Travolta.
Deviant Artistry
John Wayne was offered the lead role in Blazing Saddles by Mel Brooks but turned it down.
The famous Dr. children’s book Green Eggs and Ham contained just 50 different words.
At various points in history the Olympics included competitions in categories such as painting, engraving, architecture, literature, and town planning.
During World War II, so many NFL players were fighting in the war that the rival Philadelphia Eagles and Pittsburgh Steelers temporarily teamed up to form a team called the “Steagles“.
Until recently, Russia did not consider beer an alcoholic drink. Anything containing less than 10% alcohol is considered a soft drink in Russia until 2011.
ONE OF MY FAVS
More people are killed by vending machines each year than sharks.
Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties and local bars to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink by a woman. Many females are using a date rape drug on the market called “Beer.” The drug is found in liquid form and is available anywhere. It comes in bottles, cans, or from taps and in large kegs. Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and sleep with them. A woman needs only to get a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then simply asks him to come home with her for some no-strings attached sex.
Please! Forward this warning to every male you know. If you fall victim to this Beer scam and the women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter with similarly victimized men. For the support group nearest you just look up “Golf Courses” in the phone book
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A man walks into a bar and says “G-g-gimme a b-b-beer. The bartender says, “Seems as though you’ve got a major stuttering problem.” The man replies, N-n-no k-k-kidding!” The bartender says, “I used to stutter, but my wife cured me. One afternoon she gave me oral sex three times in a row, and I haven’t stuttered since!” The man says, “W-w-wow, th-th-that’s great to kn-kn-know” A week later, the same man returns to the bar, and says, “G-g-gimme a b-b-beer.” The bartender says, “Why didn’t you do what I told you?” “I d-d-did try”, said the man. “It j-j-just d-d-didn’t w-w-work. But I m-m-must say, you have a r-r-really n-nice apartment.
AND TO MY BETTER-HALF AND ALL OF YOU OTHER BEER FANATICS
I’m not a religious person but I’ve always been curious about how and when all of the religions were founded. Every story is as ridiculous as can be but I still remain curious. I know many of you Christians out there are firm believers but believing in things that are unknown and unprovable brings out my skeptical side and lack of faith. That skepticism prompted this short quiz to see just how much all of you believers know about religion. Have fun with it because it isn’t all that easy. As always the answers will be listed below.
Only one book mentions the name of God in the Bible. Which one?
What mythological beast as the head of a man, the body of a lion, and the tail and feet of a dragon?
According to the Bible, what substance was used to caulk Noah’s Ark and to seal the basket in which the infant Moses was set adrift on the Nile?
In the Bible, which of the four horsemen of the Apocalypse rides a red horse?
What country was the world’s first constitutionally atheistic state?
What name is the most common in the Bible-shared by 32 people in the Old Testament and one in the New Testament?
What is the meaning of orbium phonographicorum theca, one of the words the Vatican has added to the Latin language in a bid to keep up to date?
How many decks were there on Noah’s ark?
“Salt of the Earth”, “Feet of Clay”, “Apple of My Eye”, are all clichés from the Bible. What is there common source?
According to the Bible, in which city were the disciples of Jesus first called Christians?
Answers
Esther, the Manticore, Pitch, or natural asphalt, War, Albania 1967-1990, Zachariah, Discothèque, Three (Genesis 6:16), The King James Bible, Antioch (Acts 11:26)
I’d like once again to share some lovely poetry by the worlds children. These poems are sweet and heartfelt which isn’t unusual when written by the pure of heart. I hope you enjoy them as much as I have. The topic for today is PEOPLE.
I’m feeling the need to post another quiz. In recent weeks I’ve posted quizzes from pop culture in the 1960’s and 1970’s and the age of the reader almost always determined their average score. Apparently looking back isn’t very popular these days with our younger generations. Todays attempt at reawakening the past will include questions of Science facts from the 1970’s. The answers will be posted below.
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THE CONCORDE
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EVERYONE LUVS SCIENCE
__________ was one of two Soviet cosmonauts who took part in the Apollo-Soyuz mission.
How fast could the Concorde jets fly?
What year did Amtrak begin service?
By 1972, __________ percentage of American homes had color TV’s?
What year was smallpox eradicated?
The first Apple Computer available on the market was the __________.
Amtrak immediately cut the number of passenger train routes from ___________ to __________.
In what country was the last reported naturally occurring case of smallpox?
Steve Jobs, Steve Wozniak, and __________ are the founders of Apple.
The Apollo-Soyuz used mission allowed the Soviets/Russians to build the __________.
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THE MIR
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Answers
Alexi Neonov or Valeri Kubasov, Mach 2.02 or 1330 mph, 1971, 50%, 1977, Apple I, 366 to 184, Somalia, Ronald Wayne, the Mir space station.
Everyone loves music of one sort or another and I’m no different. Unfortunately I think 50% of the music being made today is garbage. I may be considered a music snob but I only like GOOD MUSIC. I like some Heavy Metal, some R&B, some Opera, some Disco, and even some Rap, as long as it’s good. Today’s post will add to your trivia knowledge of the music business. If you’re just a casual music fan you may not be aware of a lot of the facts I’m going to list but that’s what’s so great about music, it’s all about personal preferences.
It is estimated that the “Happy Birthday to You” song earns Warner Music up to $5000 in royalties per day.
The bass player and co-lead singer of the band Kiss was named Chaim Witz.
John Denver’s real name was Henry John Deutschendorf Jr.
Leo Fender, inventor of the Telecaster, Stratocaster, and Precision Bass guitars, could not play the guitar.
Rolling Stone magazine twice listed Jimi Hendrix as the number one greatest guitar player of all time.
QUEEN
Brian May, lead guitarist for the band Queen, also had a PhD in astrophysics.
The song “Le Freak” by the band Chic, was the first song to hit number one on the US Billboard Hot 100 chart three separate times.
Madonna, with 38 singles, followed by Elvis Presley, The Beatles, and Michael Jackson, had the most top 10 singles on the Billboard Hot 100 chart.
Mike Nesmith the famous member of the made-for-television band The Monkees also invented Liquid Paper the popular correction fluid.
The Village People once advertised for members with a personal ad requesting: Wanted: Macho Types, Must Dance and Have a Mustache.
It’s once again time for me to justify this blog’s name. Here are twelve items of Useless Information that aren’t commonly known.
Although the earth is 70% water, just 1% of it is considered drinkable.
The first people to measure Mount Everest lied about tall it was. Their measurement was exactly 29,000 feet but they thought no one would believe it came to that exact measurement so they added two more feet to the total.
The animal with the longest hibernation period is a frog.
Every planet in the solar system could fit in the space between Earth and the moon even if you include Pluto.
Neil Armstrong claims that he actually said, “That’s one small step for a man” when he landed on the moon.
Arnold Schwarzenegger almost missed out on the title role in Terminator to none other than O.J. Simpson.
The mask worn by Michael Myers in the Halloween series was actually a white plastic Captain Kirk mask.
Bill Buckner had more career hits than Ted Williams.
No one has ever recorded a perfect March Madness bracket.
Cleopatra’s reign was closer to the date of the moon landings than the building of the pyramids.
The United States government once poisoned beer during prohibition.
The first bomb dropped by the Allies on Germany during World War II killed an elephant. It fell on the Berlin zoo.
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