It’s time to end this series of posts about limericks. It’s been fun writing and researching all of these older limericks and I’ll continue to do so with periodic posts of this type. I became enamored with limericks as a ten year old boy listening at the door of a card game while my father and his friends were playing poker. One of them recited the following limerick and I’ve never forgotten it. It imbodies everything I like in poetry. It’s both a little funny and a little bawdy. Enjoy. . .
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There was a man from Cass
Whose balls were made of brass.
During inclement weather he’d rub them together
And lightning would shoot out of his ass.
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If you aren’t smiling at that one then limericks aren’t for you. Over the years I’ve written many myself and upset both friends and family because I lean to the bawdy side of things. The following ditty was written by me just a few days ago and it reminded just how much fun it is to create one. Here it is . . .
I’ve always been a huge fan of Asimov even before I learned he was a proficient writer of limericks. I’ve been reading his novels for many years and have always considered him to be fellow lover of science fiction. After reading some of his limericks I discovered his relationship with John Ciardi and their famous limerick wars. For those of you not familiar with Azimov and his works I’d recommend you read his greatest work, The Foundation Series. I love reading long and involved stories and I’d put Asimov right up there with J.R.R Tolkien and J. K Rowling. Here’s a few samples of his well constructed limericks.
While primarily known as a poet and translator of Dante’s Divine Comedy, he also wrote several volumes of children’s poetry and contributed to the Saturday Review as a columnist and long-time poetry editor. I could continue with all of his accomplishments but they are endless. In 1981 he co-authored a book, LIMERICKS, with his friend Isaac Asimov. It was called a “War of Words (limericks)” and makes for a great read. Two utterly famous men who absolutely loved writing limericks just for fun.
I’d like to introduce to you Mr. Edward Lear. He was a prolific writer of hundreds of limericks in the early days. They are much milder in content than what we are currently seeing. Enjoy!
I pride myself on having a huge and varied collection of limericks as you well know. Most of them are very old with the identity of the writers long forgotten. For the next two weeks I’ll be highlighting some of the more famous limerick writers with samples of their work. Most were well known poets, writers, and authors. Some of their limericks will be off-color and a bit sexual so I recommend that younger children be monitored. Over the next two weeks you’ll be introduced to some of histories best limerick authors. I hope you enjoy them as much as I have.
The first thing I’d like to do is give you a short history lesson on limericks because they’ve been around a lot longer than you might think. The first known limericks appeared in the early 18th century and they just happened to be written in French (and they weren’t called limericks then). Around that same time the Irish Brigade was serving in France (1691 to 1780). The short poems were eventually imported to Limerick, Ireland where their current name originated. Edward Lear 1812-1888, initially wrote many rather mild limericks. It wasn’t until the Victorian Era that the citizenry seized upon the limerick as a way to vent as many four-letter words as possible, much to the delight of young schoolboys. It seems that the bawdiest limericks of that time tended to be written by the British. A few samples of Lear’s tamer limericks will be featured in my next post in two days.
Here is a sample a moderately bawdy limerick of the era:
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Said a widow whose singular vice
Was to keep her dead husband on ice,
“It’s been hard since I lost him.
I’ll never defrost him,
Cold comfort, but cheap at the price.”
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My next post will be an introduction to Edward Lear who authored many limericks over many years.
As some of you will remember, I search constantly to find and purchase old books. I recently received one of the strangest books I’ve ever seen. The book is titled BIZARRE BOOKS – A COMPENDIUM OF CLASSIC ODDITIES. As we all know almost anyone can write a book. Some become famous and sell millions of copies but then there are these others. This book is a collection of nothing but book titles going back hundreds of years and to say some are strange is an understatement as you will see. I’ll be posting on more of these titles in the future after I finish reading the book. Todays topic concerns 15 book titles containing blatant Double Entendre. Here goes northing . . .
I’ve always been fascinated by facts that aren’t commonly known. We humans use thousands of products each year and have little or no idea where or when those products originated and who were the geniuses that created them. Todays post will list a number of miscellaneous facts on a wide selection of topics.
Modern glass products will take at least 4,000 years to decompose.
It is considered rude to talk with your hands on your hips in Indonesia.
Mother Teresa, known for caring for the children of India, was born Agnes Gonxha Bojaxhiu in Albania. She lived from 1910 to 1997.
Christmas cards were first sent in London in 1843.
The first kiss ever seen in a movie was in 1896. The movie was called The Kiss.
Russian cosmonaut Valentina V. Tereshkova was the first women in space in 1963.
The Pennsylvania Dutch believe that if a woman eats the last piece of bread, she will become an “old maid”.
The first Thanksgiving at Plymouth Rock lasted three days.
In Britain a black cat is considered lucky. In the US not so much.
In ancient Greece the herb parsley was associated with death.
It is unlucky to wear the color white at a Chinese wedding.
Famous advice columnists Dear Abby and Ann Landers were identical twins.
My Fav
In Arizona it is illegal to have more than two dildoes in a house.
I’ve been told for many years by a host of dog loving family members, neighbors, and assorted experts that “dogs are a mans best friend“. I think in some cases that’s true based on my years of experience with my father who raised and trained beagles. Our house was constantly filled with herds of puppies and I had the misfortune of shoveling a few thousand wheelbarrow loads of dog sh*t as one of my many disgusting chores. I’ve owned a few dogs over the years but finally came to realize and admit that I’m quite simply a “cat person“. I still like dogs but only if they’re someone else’s. Todays post is primarily for all of you dog lovers out there and includes a few of my favorite dog jokes which don’t require me to shovel anything.
What do you call a gathering of Pomeranians at a bar? YAPPY HOUR
What’s a dogs favorite wine? PLEASE, PLEASE, THROW MY BALL.
What are a dogs three favorite drinks at the bar? A MUTTINI, A COSMOPOODLETIN, AND AN AVALANCHE FOR ALL THOSE ST. BERNARDS OUT THERE.
A man went to visit a friend and was amazed to find him playing chess with his dog. “I can hardly believe my eyes!” he exclaimed. “That’s the smartest dog I’ve ever seen.” “Oh, he’s not so smart,” the friend replied. “I’ve beaten him three games out of five.”
Dogs will come if you call them. Cats take a message and get back to you.
My Favorite Dog Haiku
The sound of dog treats
Shaking inside their box
It’s like the angels singing.
A police officer and his K-9 partner were sitting in a parked police van on the side of the road. A little boy looked in the back of the van, then came around to the officers window and knocked. The office rolled down the window. “Is that a dog you’ve got back there?” the boy asked. “It sure is.” the policeman replied. The boy looked back at the van, then back to the officer. “What did he do?” asked the boy.
I love posting quizzes but I do realize that many of them are extremely difficult as reflected by some of the readers who have complained. I decided today to post question’s from the 1990’s that should be somewhat easier to answer. There are eleven questions with the correct answers listed below.
Who became the first president of Russia after the Soviet Union dissolved in 1990?
In Harry Potter/Sorcerer’s Stone, who gives Harry his letter of acceptance into Hogwarts on his eleventh birthday?
What was Bart Simpson’s catchphrase?
What other name were three-quarter length capri pants known by?
During which war was Wolfenstein 3D set?
Ice skater Tonya Harding’s husband organized an attack on which skater at the 1994 US Figure Skating Championship?
In The Big Lebowski what is the Dude’s drink of choice?
Which toy featured red and blue boxing robots?
In The Spice Girls-Spice Up Your Life do you shake it to the left or the right?
1991’s Hook was a retelling of what classic children’s book?
And finally a question concerning one of my favorite songs.
On what album was Radiohead’s hit Creep released?
Answers
Boris Yeltsin, Rubeus Hagrid, “Eat My Shorts”, Pedal Pushers, WW II, Nancy Kerrigan, A White Russian, Rock’em Sock’em Robots, To the Right, Peter Pan, Fav: Pablo Honey
Just another cold and crappy day in Maine and if you want live here you’d better learn to love this insane winter weather. I seem to run a bit slower when it’s cold and nasty and my desire to post long and involved articles has disappeared. Today will be another “mish/mosh” of interesting and sometimes strange facts you may not be familiar with. Here we go . . . .
The continent with the highest literacy rate is Antarctica.
The country of Saudi Arabia really does import a better quality sand to make glass.
The Smithsonian archives allegedly hold a jar containing a rubber mold of John Dillinger’s penis.
The United States bought Alaska from Russia for a price that equated to under two cents per acre.
Soviet scientists once tried to create a human/chimpanzee hybrid. It failed.
Confederate general Robert E. Lee didn’t own slaves, but Union general Ulysses S. Grant did.
People in the Roman Empire actually used human urine as mouthwash.
Adolph Hitler had a nephew, William Hitler, AKA William Stuart-Houston, who served in the U.S Navy during the war.
The kazoo was invented by a gentleman named Alabama Vest.
During WW1 Americans referred to sauerkraut as “liberty cabbage”.
❤️MY FAV❤️
The male Argonaut Octopus mates by detaching it’s sex organ and flinging it towards the female.
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