Archive for the ‘happy new year’ Tag
These are the normal lame and politically correct ones. Let’s get real for a change!!
I post my resolutions almost every year and I have yet to complete them all. Once again, I’ll post my top ten and just hope for the best like always. Well here goes nothing one more time.
- Read 8.33 books a month (That’s 100 books for all of you math majors).
- Keep the number of F-Bombs to less than a hundred a week. (I’m dreaming on this one.)
- Spend less than $50.00 a week on Dunkin Coffee. (That’s just for my better-half. They’re too expensive for me.)
- Drink less than last year but more next year. (I’m dreaming!)
- Visit only the classiest porn sites. (No more than 10 per week unless provoked)
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- No naked dancing near the picture window in the living room. (We have nervous neighbors!)
- Try not to argue with my better-half too much. (The operative word here is to try.)
- Teach the grandsons no more than five new swear words. (And maybe learn one or two new ones from them.)
- Try to be more polite to all of the doctors that have been manhandling me for years.
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There are my ten candidates for 2023. I’ll be certain to post a midyear review in June.
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL
Drive Safe
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It’s time for me to switch from my Christmas preparations since it’s almost here, to my annual prep for New Year’s. Since I’m planning to abandon the blog for a few days over each holiday, (24-26 Dec & 31-02 Jan), I thought getting my New Year’s resolutions posted early made a lot of sense. I enjoy making them every year but almost never live up to my own expectations. The important thing is to keep trying. There’s the challenge for you.
“New Year’s Day now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.” —Mark Twain
- Read a minimum of 50 books this year.
- Spend more quality time with the grandchildren.
- For the third year in a row (failed three times), I won’t walk naked near the front picture window. It freaks out the bicyclists, joggers and neighbors.
- Drink less than last year but more than next year.
- Complete the Recipe/Photo book I’ve been working on for years.
“An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.” —Bill Vaughn
- Keep the F-bombs to less than ten per day.
- Spend less than $50.00 a month at Dunkin Donuts.
- Lose 20 pounds of ugly fat.
- Complete at least five new paintings.
- Be a kinder and gentler pet owner. The cat requested this one.
“New Year’s Resolution: To tolerate fools more gladly, provided this does not encourage them to take up more of my time.” —James Agate
Those are my ten official resolutions for 2022. Although as I was surfing the net earlier today, I discovered two more which I’m unofficially adding to my list.
11. I will not act my age.
12. I will not sit in my living room all day in my pajamas. Instead, I will move my computer into the bedroom.
“I’m a little bit older, a little bit wiser, a little bit rounder, but still none the wiser.” —Robert Paul
WISH ME LUCK
2 SHOPPING DAYS LEFT
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