Archive for the ‘Food Related’ Category

12/28/2024 “X-MAS FOOD COMA”   Leave a comment

Christmas is gone . . . thankfully. I love all the presents, and I love all the decorations (if I’m not forced into putting them up), but my downfall is all the damn food. I’m what you might call a “taster”. I love tasting everything and this year was the worst since last year. I swear we had enough food for twenty people but unfortunately, there were only seven of us. That means that I’ll be eating reheated holiday leftovers for at least the next two weeks. Also, let’s not forget the large influx of food anticipated on New Years Eve and again on New Years Day. I have absolutely no willpower and I’ll probably be found dead with a large slab of lukewarm ham hanging out of my mouth. With that cheery thought in mind, I’ll be posting a few tidbits of trivia about food as I sit here eating blueberry donuts and cherry lifesavers.

  • Animal Crackers were introduced in 1902 as a Christmas novelty item and packaged with a string for a handle. It made it easier to hang them on the Christmas tree as an ornament.
  • Coffee was officially recognized as a Christian drink by Pope Clement VIII in 1592.
  • Most of the egg rolls sold in grocery stores in the United States are actually produced in Houston, Texas.
  • The American city that consumes the most ketchup is New Orleans.
  • Eighty-seven percent of whole milk is water.

  • Miss Piggy of Muppets fame was once quoted, “Never eat more than you can lift.”
  • The term “Surf & Turf” was coined by gastronome Diamond Jim Brady and was first served to him at a waterfront restaurant in Brooklyn, NY, in the late 1880’s.
  • The name Lorna Doone was the name given to a shortbread cookie in 1869 based on a novel by the same name.
  • Baskin-Robbins introduced an ice cream, Lunar Cheesecake, in 1969 to commemorate the moon landing.
  • Salsa overtook the ever-popular ketchup as the top selling condiment in 1991.

BRING ON NEW YEARS, I’M NOT TOO AFRAID

12/19/2024 “X-MAS HOMEBREW”   Leave a comment

I’ve been a homebrewer for more than thirty years. I’ve made thousands of bottles of wine over the years because I’m just not a big fan of beer. My few attempts at making beer were miserable failures or that’s what I’ve been told by the “Beer” people. It was a fun hobby and mostly kept me at home and out of trouble for years. When I notice something related to home brewing, I always save it for later use. This post has been in my files for a lot of years, and I can’t even remember where it came from, so I dusted it off, and here it is. Maybe next Christmas it might motivate some of you “Beer” people give it a try.

“TWAS THE HOMEBREWER’S NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS”

Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house,
Every creature was thirsty, including the mouse…
The steins were empty, and the bottles were too
The beer had been drunk with no time to brew.


My family was nestled all snug in their beds
While visions of Christmas Ale foamed in their heads.
Mama in her kerchief lamented the drought,
She craved a pilsner and I, a large stout.


When out on the lawn, there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my chair to see what was the matter.
Away to the kitchen, I flew like a flash,
Opening the door with a loud bang and crash!

I threw on the switch and the lights, all aglow,
Gave a luster of mid-day to the brew-pot below.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear
But Gambrinus himself, the patron of beer.


With a look in his eye, so lively and quick,
He said, “You want beer? Well, here, take your pick.”
More rapid than eagles, his recipes came
As he whistled and shouted and called them by name.

“Now, Pilsener! Now, Porter! Now, Stout and Now Maerzen!
On, Bitter! On, Lager! On, Bock and On Weizen!”
“To the top of the bottles, the short and the tall,
Now brew away, brew away, and fill them all!”


As dried hops before a wild hurricane fly,
And then, without warning, settle down with a sigh,
So towards the brew-pot, the ingredients flew,
Malt extract, roasted barley and crystal malt, too.

And then in a twinkling, I heard it quite plain,
The cracking open of each barley grain.
As I drew in my head and was turning around,
Into the kitchen, he came with a bound.

He was dressed like a knight, from his head to his toes,
With an old family crest adorning his clothes.
A bundle of hops, he had flung on his back,
And the brewing began when he opened his pack.


His hops were so fragrant! His barley, how sweet!
The adjuncts included Munich malt and some wheat.
The malted barley was mashed in the tun,
Then boiled with hops in the brew-pot ’till done.

Excitement had me gnashing my teeth,
As the sweet smell encircled my head like a wreath.
Beer yeast was pitched, both lager and ale,
The wort quickly fermented; not once did it fail.

It was then krausened, or with sugar primed,
And just being bottled when midnight had chimed.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know, I’d be shortly in bed.

He spoke not a word but kept on with his work,
And capped all the bottles, then turned with a jerk.
And laying a finger alongside his nose,
He belched (quite a burp!) before he arose.

Clean-up was easy, with only a whistle,
And away the mess flew, like the down on a thistle.
And I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he left me the beer,
“Merry Christmas to all and a HOPPY New Year!”

11/28/2024 “HAPPY THANKSGIVING”   Leave a comment

🦃TURKEY DAY🍗

The human body is an amazing organism. It can create miracles by healing itself to survive unbelievably nasty injuries. That doesn’t change the fact that it can also be truly disgusting as we all know. Today’s Thanksgiving post will review some gross facts about the human body and the things that it has the ability to produce after eating a turkey and all the side dishes. A little gross but what isn’t. This should be on your mind as you chow down on your big meal today. LOL

URINE

The average person produces approximately 3 pints of urine a day. In the normal adult the bladder rarely holds more than about 3/4 of a pint of urine, with the urge to urinate coming at the 1/2-pint mark. More than one pint causes pain and an intense urge to urinate immediately.

FUN FACT: In Roman times gladiators would brush their teeth with urine and then gargle with it too. They believed it was good for their gums.

SPIT

Most people produce approximately 8 cups of spit a day. It’s produced by three sets of salivary glands around the mouth area. That works out to about 50,700 pints produced in the average human lifetime. Thats enough to fill a couple of large swimming pools.

VOMIT

In humans very often after one person begins vomiting, it triggers vomiting in others (emetophobia). Compared to other animals, humans are relatively light on vomiting. Big vegetarian whales vomit every 7-10 days to help get rid of anything inedible they may have swallowed by accident. Dogs not only vomit frequently, but they’ll also eat their own vomit. Probably the most vomitus animals, however, are cows, who digest otherwise in edible grass by regurgitating it into their mouths, chewing it for a bit, and then swallowing it over and over again.

FUN FACT: Emetophobia is the fear of vomiting and of being around others who are vomiting. It is the fifth most common phobia according to the International Emetophobia Society.

SNOT

Snot is a defensive function, stopping for example germs, dirt and pollen from getting into your lungs. The average person produces approximately 1/2 pint of snot per day. When you sneeze, up to six pints of air is blasted out of your lungs at approximately 100 miles per hour, along with any germs you may be carrying at the time. Sneezing is also the main way that illnesses like colds and flu are spread among humans.

FECES

If you add up all the time spent eating and drinking by an average human over the course of their entire life, it comes to approximately 5 years. This adds up to 33 tons of food, which is equivalent to eating six entire elephants. Unfortunately, what goes in must come out. Most of that mass is water that you lose through sweating, breathing, and peeing, or carbon that you breathe out in the form of carbon dioxide, while a lot of the rest goes into making new bits for your body that need replacing. The result is that during your lifetime you will produce a pile of feces about the size of a car.

FUN FACT: According to the World Toilet Organization, the average person visits the toilet approximately 6-8 times a day, or 2500 times a year, and spends three years of their life sitting on the toilet.

EAT UP, ENJOY YOUR MEAL, AND GO NAP ON THE SOFA!

11/12/2024 🍔FOODIE ALERT🍟   Leave a comment

For many years I’ve considered myself a true “foodie”. I’ve always made a point to try damn near anything called food. Of course, that has changed dramatically as I’ve aged. Truthfully, I don’t really miss my entrees of “dog soup” and “cat spring rolls” I once tried in Korea. So, when I started collecting odd facts and trivia, food always seems to be mentioned in some fashion. Here are a few little-known facts about food I’ve collected. How many have your heard before?

  • What is the name of the dog on the Cracker Jack box? Bingo.
  • What is the American name for the British delicacy known as trotters? Pig’s feet.
  • Under US government regulations, what percentage of peanut butter has to be peanuts? 90%.
  • Who originally coined the phrase that has been appropriated as the slogan for Maxwell House coffee; “Good to the last drop”? President Theodore Roosevelt
  • What recipe did Texas ice cream maker Elmer Doolin buy for a $100 from the owner of a San Antonio café in 1933 and later used to make a fortune? The recipe for tasty corn chips that was later marketed as Fritos. He made them at night in his mother’s kitchen and peddled them from his Model-T Ford.

  • A California winemaker from Napa Valley once named a wine in honor of Marilyn Monroe. What was it called? Marilyn Merlot.
  • What food product was discovered because of a long camel ride? Cottage cheese. An Arab trader found that milk he was carrying in a goatskin bag had turned into a tasty solid white curd.
  • Peter Cooper, best known for inventing the locomotive “Tom Thumb”, patented a dessert in 1845. What was it? A gelatin treat that eventually became known as Jell-O when it was marketed in 1897.
  • In 1867 Emperor Napoleon III had a chemist develop a food product “for the army, navy, and the needy classes of the population.” What was it? Margarine.
  • What was the drink we know as the Bloody Mary originally called? The Red Snapper, which was it’s name when it crossed the Atlantic from Harry’s New York Bar in Paris.

THIS HAS BEEN A LOW CARB POSTING

11/02/2024 “ANSWERS”   Leave a comment

A Rural Library

I find it amazing that the longer I live the less I seem to know. I’ve spent many years compiling and posting odd facts and there’s no end in sight. Here are two questions that most people have wondered about at one time or another but never really obtained a reasonable answer for. Here’s your reasonable answers.

HOW DID THE WORD “COCKTAIL” ORIGINATE?

A cocktail is an alcoholic drink that comprises a number of ingredients that are mixed or shaken together. There are hundreds of different concoctions and their often sweet, colorful and interestingly named, such as the Grasshopper, the Rusty Nail, Sex on the Beach and the Slippery Nipple. There seem to be hundreds of explanations for the origination of that word but many of them are utter nonsense. This is one explanation that caught my attention, and I immediately chose to believe it. In the 18th century an innkeeper named Betsy Flanigan stole chickens from her neighbors and cooked them for her patrons. After the meal, she would serve mixed drinks and place a chicken feather in each of them. At this display, one French customer yelled, “Vive le cocktail. I know that sounds silly but it’s no sillier than many of the others I’ve read about. This is my favorite explanation, and I hope it’s true.

WHEN AND HOW WAS TOILET PAPER INVENTED?

The Chinese invented toilet paper in the 14th century, and the Bureau of Imperial Supplies produced paper for use by the Chinese emperors. In 1857 the first factory producing toilet paper was made by American Joseph Cayetty who named his product Therapeutic Paper, and it was sold in packs of 500 sheets. Before the invention of toilet paper, different areas of the world use different things. Public toilets in ancient Rome provided a moist sponge on the end of the stick, while the Vikings who occupied England used discarded wool, and later in the Middle Ages that was replaced by a balls of hay. In Hawaii, meanwhile, coconut husks were used, while the early Eskimos used snow and tundra moss. French royalty used strips of lace and British lords used pages from books. In the United States, newspapers and telephone directories were commonly used, as were other books. The Old Farmer’s Almanac was actually printed with a hole punched through the corner of each page so that it could be hung in outhouses, and the Sears catalog was widely used until it began being printed on glossy paper. It’s use as a hygiene product became instantly unpopular as did corncobs in farm country.

(Ouch!)

10/17/2024 💥💥FOODIE LIMERICKS💥💥   Leave a comment

Here are a few limericks concerning food. They aren’t that bawdy, but they should still be considered “food for the soul”. So, enjoy them all especially the one with those juicy cantaloupes.

💥

By Ed Cunningham

As the natives got ready to serve

A midget explorer named Merv,

“This meal will be brief,”

Said the cannibal chief,

“For this is at best an hors d’oeuvre.”

💥💥

By Charlotte McBee

A greengrocer’s wife, named Yvette,

Took her cantaloupes out (for a bet).

A couple of felons

Made off with her melons,

And they’ve not apprehended them yet!

💥💥💥

By Val Pohler

A young lady too fond of meringue

Let concerns for her figure go hang.

She consumed them in tons,

Along with cream buns,

Until she went off with a BANG!

💥💥💥💥

By Frank Richards

There was an old man of Peru

Who watched his wife making a stew.

He said, “It’s too thin.”

So, she pushed him right in,

Saying, “Nobody’s thicker than you!”

💥💥💥💥💥

TA DA!

10/10/2024 “BRING BACK the 1940’s”   Leave a comment

Today’s post is going to do the unimaginable and permit us to time travel back 84 years to 1940. This is going to be a rambling narrative of things that were happening at the time and will start with the top five movies of the day: Boom Town, Fantasia, His Girl Friday, Kitty Foyle, and Knute Rockne All-American. Strange as it seems I recently saw a couple of these movies being streamed and I spent an hour and a half watching His Girl Friday with Cary Grant. After all those years it was still fun to watch because Cary Grant was effing amazing.

Ginger Rogers earned the best actress at the Academy Awards. The movie Grapes of Wrath was huge, and Walt Disney’s animation began to become a force in the movie industry with Pinocchio and Fantasia. Tom and Jerry weren’t far behind with Hanna-Barbera releasing Puss Gets the Boot. The year also brought us two future celebrities: Smokey Robinson born on February 19 and Peter Fonda born February 23. With the Great Depression over, 1940 consumer food intake became more dependent on canned foods such as soup, meat and vegetables.

Air travel was on the rise and the NFL’s Green Bay Packers became the first team to travel by air. The TWA Transcontinental Airline introduced the Stratoliner to help promote more travel across the continent. The United States had yet to be drawn into the war in Europe. The 1939-1940 World’s Fair was held at Flushing Meadows-Corona Park in New York and was the largest world’s fair of all time.

In the world of sports baseball rapidly was spreading in popularity across the country. The Negro National League was steadily becoming more popular with teams like the Washington Homestead Grays (league champs), the Baltimore Elite Giants, and the Newark Eagles playing to large crowds.

Knute Rockne ruled college football with the University of Minnesota Golden Gophers being named the national champs. The Heisman Trophy winner was Michigan halfback Tom Harmon. The NFL Chicago Bears defeated the Washington Redskins 73-0, in one of the most one-sided games in professional football history.

In the early 1940’s cars began to take on a lower, longer and broader look. This new look fit in well with the luxury cars that were beginning to be produced. They were the La Salle Series 52, the Lincoln Zephyr V-12, and the Packard Custom Super-8 180.The Pennsylvania Turnpike was opened on October 1, 1940, and the first Los Angeles freeway was dedicated in December.

The entertainment industry released the top hits of 1940: In the Mood-Glenn Miller, Frensi-Arte Shaw, Only Forever-Bing Crosby, and I’ll Never Smile Again-Tommy Dorsey. The talk radio shows of 1940 listed The Adventures of Ellery Queen, Edgar Bergen and Charlie McCarthy, and Fibber McGee and Molly. And last but not least Franklin Delano Roosevelt hit the campaign trail in an attempt for a third term.

Now for some of the important stuff. The US population was 132 million. The average salary for a full-time employee was $1200 a year with the minimum wage of $.30 an hour. A loaf of bread was $.08, a pound of bacon was $.27, a pound of butter was $.36, a dozen eggs were $.33, a gallon of milk was $.26, a pound of coffee which $.21, 5 pounds of sugar was $.26, 10 pounds of potatoes was $.24, gasoline was $.11 a gallon, movie tickets were $.24, postage stamps were $.03, and an average car cost $990.00, and a single-family home was on average $2938.00.

I BECAME SPEECHLESS WHEN I SAW THOSE PRICES

08/31/2024 P💩O💩O💩P   1 comment

As I sit here this morning looking for inspiration for this post I received a text message from my grandson. He just received from his parents his first real phone and he immediately reached out to me with a typical text from someone his age (11). It consisted of about 60 rows of poop emojis with a short sentence, “My gift to you LOL.” I’m not sure why it is that kids love talking about farting and pooping exclusively but it seems to be something trending online as well these days. Tick-Tock is full of farting individuals blasting away in crowded street scenes. I have to admit it’s incredibly funny and apparently poop humor starts at a very young age. Hoping that the “little shit” (no pun intended) will someday read this post and learn a few more disgusting facts about poop he needs to know.

  • People often fart shortly after they die.
  • The most germ laden place on your toilet isn’t the seat or even the bowl. It’s the handle.
  • The average healthy adult expels between 100 and 200 grams, almost half a pound, of feces every day.
  • More than 6.5 million Americans have fecal incontinence – the inability to control the passage of stool – and most of them are women.
  • Americans used 36.5 billion rolls of toilet paper every year, which represents at least 15 million trees.

🧻🧻🧻

  • Most people produce 1 to 4 pints of gas and pass it approximately 14 times per day.
  • The foul odor of flatulence comes from intestinal bacteria as it releases gases that contain sulfur and, in some cases, methane, one of the greenhouse gases responsible for global warming.
  • Adolf Hitler suffered from chronic flatulence, for which he took anti-gas pills.
  • 40% of the world’s people have no toilet, and must use the bathroom in any public place they can find: bushes, roadsides, alleys, etc.
  • In a humid environment like the bathroom, a single bacterial cell can multiply into 1 billion cells overnight.

🚽🚽🚽

Well, there you have it folks, everything you never wanted to know about poop and its related activities. And a special thanks to my grandson (the poop specialist) for his inspiration.

💩GO, GO, GO💩

07/20/2024 “NECTAR OF THE GODS”   Leave a comment

For many years I’ve been a lover of fine wines but even more obsessed with fine whiskies. The king of whiskey for me is bourbon. If I would have had two sons one of them would have been named “Jack” and the other named “Daniel”. A few years ago, I was in my seventh month of chemotherapy and wasn’t allowed any hard liquor. I was unfortunately forced to drink a series of less than satisfying hard ciders which truly sucked. Finally, the chemo ended, and I was given permission by all of my doctors to have a “real” drink. I returned home and poured myself a large glass of Jack Daniels and came very close to multiple orgasms. I got thoroughly wasted by that one drink, but I knew immediately that I was still alive. Today’s post contains quotes from a number of people with their own opinions about whiskey and they’re definitely worth remembering.

  • “A gulp of hot whiskey at bedtime – it’s not very scientific, but it helps.” Alexander Fleming (the discoverer of penicillin)
  • “I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.” Tommy Cooper
  • “Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down. Down into my belly.” A quote from the movie Anchorman
  • “You actually go down to Kentucky, Louisville, and they’ve got bourbons that make Old Grandad and Jack Daniels look like Schweppes bitterly lemon . . . there’s one called Rebel Yell and that’s dynamite shit.” Keith Richards
  • “You cannot drink gin and tonic in the middle of the night. You must have whiskey to give you energy.” Margaret Thatcher

  • “My God, so much I like to drink Scotch that sometimes I think my name is Igor Stra-whiskey.” Igor Stravinsky
  • “My family was a bunch of drunks. When I was six, I came up missing, they put my picture on bottles of Scotch.” Rodney Dangerfield
  • “When life hands you lemons, make Whiskey Sours.” WC Fields
  • “I like my whiskey old and my women young.” Errol Flynn
  • “There is no bad whiskey. There are only some whiskeys that aren’t as good as others.” Raymond Chandler

06/06/2024 💥💥Limerick Alert💥💥   1 comment

I’m feeling somewhat indifferent today. I got up early, had a cup of really godawful coffee which is not a good way to start any day. My lack of interest was exacerbated by the few things I had to accomplish. For those of you that don’t know I drive a 2008 Smart car. It’s a small vehicle on a good day but it’s the only delivery vehicle I have. Here in Maine, we recycle bottles and cans and today was the day for me to cash in all those nickels. I checked my garage and to my surprise I had 7 large bags containing 420 bottles and cans. I then loaded up my Smart car with all seven bags. Every window in the car except for the windshield was partially blocked. I managed to fit everything into the car leaving just enough room for my oversized ass. I had to travel approximately ten miles to the redemption center, and I looked ridiculous. It’s hard to look inconspicuous when you’re driving what appears to be a giant garbage bag with headlights and a windshield. Apparently, the police officer who then stopped me thought it was hysterically funny as well. There were no citations issued but we both had a few laughs about the situation. I hadn’t broken any laws, had all of the required mirrors, and he sent me on my way by standing on the berm and laughing his ass off. Just so you know I cashed in the bottles and cans and then walked next door to the liquor store. I’ll be opening that bottle of gin later because this day has got to get better. Only limericks can raise my spirits and get my day back on track. Here’s two . . .

There was a young lady of Maine

Who declared she’d a man on the brain.

But you knew from the view

Of the way her waist grew,

It was not on her brain that he’d lain.

💥💥💥

There was a young lady names Sue

Who preferred a stiff drink to a screw.

But one leads to the other,

And now she’s a mother –

Let this be a lesson to you.

💥💥💥

SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL POLICE

(And Recycle)