Archive for the ‘Sarcasm’ Category
Well I’m in the home stretch of this process and my list of 100 has been whittled down to just 30. Today will complete items 71-85 leaving only the last 15 to deal with on Thursday. Let’s get right into it.
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#71 Sean Penn – There’s no way in hell this item will ever change. I can’t find any redeeming value in his work or his personality. Unfortunately I can only hate up to 100% but with this guy I wish I could go higher. No improvement whatsoever.
#72 Jeans w/Holes – This is a look that even really beautiful women can’t pull off. I find it unsexy when someone is wearing clothes that just a few years ago I would have thrown away. I’m no longer going to hate these items of clothing but will admit to 100% feeling of Stupidity for the people who insist on wearing them. I get the same feeling when I see grown men wearing backward baseball caps. 100% improvement.
#73 Road Kill – Truly a disgusting display at any time but even worse in hot weather. Pair up disgusting with smelly and you’ve really got a winner. No improvement.
#74 Mohawks – There are variations of this item. The large. crazy and oddly colored ones I hate. The smaller and more contemporary Mohawks are subtle and don’t bother me near as much. 50% improvement.
#75 Belly Button Lint – If you stick your tongue into your lover’s belly button just once and come up with a lint ball stuck to it you can understand where I’m coming from. It’s like finding a short and curly hair on your pizza. Unacceptable and no improvement.
#76 Stinky Garbage – I’ll claim a slight change of heart on this one. Stinky garbage is something that annoys me 100%. I think hate was too strong of a word. 100% improvement.
#77 Arrogant People – There are two types of arrogant people. There are those who are really good at what they do and they throw it in your face. Then there are those who are totally incompetent and use the arrogance as a defense mechanism. Either way they both suck. No improvement.
#78 Inverted Nipples – Nipples are meant to be appreciated and played with. I find it extremely difficult to do that when they’re inverted. I really don’t hate any nipples so I’ll claim 100% improvement.
#79 Noisy Radios – Whether it’s in a restaurant, in a passing vehicle, or anywhere else it’s the most annoying thing ever. There’s a crime called "Disturbing the Peace" and I hate when someone does that to me by accident or intentionally. No improvement.
#80 The French – A liberal society with no sense of gratitude towards a country that saved their collective asses on two occasions. If they get jammed up again I hope we have the good sense to let them work things out on their own. No surrender-monkey improvement.
#81 Gerbils – Disgusting and creepy animals that serve no useful purpose that I can find. They are worth buying just so they can be disposed of. No improvement.
#82 Wallflowers – Another item where hate was too strong a word. I just feel bad for anyone who is stuck in this kind of rut. Most times they’ll grow out of it but some never do. 100% improvement.
#83 Road Tolls – Just another government intrusion into my wallet. I’ve always hated income taxes and even more so these sneaky hidden ones. No improvement now or ever.
#84 Hairy Nipples – This primarily concerns just the females out there. These days many of them expect their men to be hairless. I think it’s only fair that they pay closer attention to our wishes about them. I just hate women with hairy nipples and I find it really strange when they’re confronted with it and claim ignorance of the problem. You’d think they might look down every so often and notice. No improvement.
#85 Yellow Nail Polish – This is just something that bugs me. I’m sure there are a lot of younger women who go this route and love the color. I do not. It looks like you have smoker’s fingers and that for me is a complete turnoff. Just give me neatly manicured nails with a dark blood red color. 50% improvement.
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Fifteen more items to go and I can put this little project to bed. I’ll post the final installment on Thursday and then a final evaluation on Monday. Then it will be on to other things and completion of my 2015 New Year’s resolutions.
It’s early and I’m still snuggled up in this warm bed and I never ever want to leave it. My better-half is a person who isn’t entirely sure how to relax and just a few minutes ago she left this cozy bed to begin her endless list of chores. She’s driven by her imaginary To-Do list that instantly becomes her number one priority as soon as her feet hit the floor. I’m a goal oriented person myself but luckily I know when to just lay back, block out the world, and relax. Any minute now she’ll be delivering me a steaming hot cup of hazelnut coffee and then she’ll disappear into own little world of Christmas stuff and loud annoying music.
I don’t dislike Christmas as many people think but I also have no great love for it. As a kid It was much more of a religious holiday thanks mostly to my mother. As I grew older and lost my interest in organized religion I also lost most of my interest in Christmas. I really enjoy sharing gifts with friends and family and I actually enjoy the giving more than the receiving. My better-half is Christmas crazy and it’s gotten progressively worse since the birth of her grandson. With another child expected in March I can only assume next Christmas will be totally out of control.
There’s nine shopping days left until the big day and I’m actually looking forward to having the grandson under the tree and up to his neck in wrapping paper and gifts. He doesn’t realize yet because of his young age that this will be this last Christmas as the lone grand child. Next year he’ll have a new sibling to share the limelight with and so it will be forever. I plan on spoiling him a bit this year because I’m really sympathetic to his plight.
I’m even considering sneaking down to his house after dark disguised as Santa to look in the window and scare the crap out of him like my parents and family did to me. It was an odd way to show their love but after a few years of being deathly afraid of Santa I was able to man up and get on with my life. It was really scary.
I was about his age when my sister was born and things were never quite the same after that. I wasn’t too happy with sharing the limelight and neither will he I’m sure. That rivalry will last forever. So our little man is going to have one terrific Christmas which I hope he’ll remember and appreciate someday. I see I’m getting the evil eye from my better-half which means she’ll start bugging me to get the hell out of bed and get busy.
I fully intend to convince her that today I have my own To-Do list to worry about. Then I’ll post the blog, grab my camera, and disappear from the premises. I figure any time I can steal and spend driving around and taking pictures is a win/win. I could also hint that I need to buy her another gift or two and that should do the trick.
That’s my Christmas Story and I’m sticking to it.
It’s time for installment number five of the “Things I Once Hated” in the hopes that it’ll show I’m no longer the hater I once was. I keep telling people I’m mellowing with age but after listening to some of their comments I’m beginning to think they still aren’t believing me. I am getting mellower dammit! What’s wrong with all these people? Let’s just get started on today’s items 56-70 before I get irritated even further.
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#56 Vegans – These smelly people are no better than those religious types who insist on showing up at my house to irritate me. Trying to convince me not to eat meat is like asking the pope not to pray so much. It looks good on paper but it will never work. No improvement here you stupid veggie eating, Kool-aid drinking, dipsticks.
#57 Greasy Sink Water – Thank god for Dawn dish detergent. It’s helped me to eliminate this problem from my life which is reflected by my 50% reduction in hatred.
#58 Fake Boobs – As I’ve previously stated many times I love boobs. I’ll further qualify that statement by saying I still hate fake boobs. Some of the fakes are nice to look at as a general rule many look a little strange. Unless the women are willing to spring for the added expense of a nipple relocation they can get downright bizarre. No improvement.
#59 Ass Kissers aka Brown-Noser’s – Over the years I’ve worked with many of these folks and while it can be fun to watch them go through their antics I still can’t respect them or like them. No improvement.
#60 Waiting in Lines – This has always made me a little crazy. With the development of e-readers and IPads it no longer bothers me quite so much. 50% improvement.
#61 Autopsy’s – This can never change. I’ve been present at quite a few and it never gets any easier. No improvement.
#62 Bee Stings – This one has faded into my past and something I’ve finally learned to deal with. If they sting me now I just get the best bee killing insecticide on the market and kill every last one of the little bastards. 100% improvement.
# 63 Stinky Breath – To me this is just one step below Body Odor. What’s amazing to me is that 77.54% of people who have BO also have terrible breath. Is there some sort of connection there? Who knows? No improvement.
#64 Illegal Aliens – Seeing as how my better-half’s son currently living in LA was rear ended by an unlicensed and uninsured illegal Mexican driver this week. No freaking improvement. Suck it Mr. President.
#65 Adam Sandler – I’ve totally changed my mind on Mr. Sandler. I’ve finally seen a few things of his that I really enjoyed. 100% improvement.
#66 Democrats – I’ll just refer you back to my comment on Liberals at item #36. No improvement.
#67 Wet Farts – I don’t like having them and I don’t like sitting near someone else who’s having them. PU! No improvement.
#68 Feet Calluses – I’ll again refer you back to item #40, Corns. There’s nothing as romantic as snuggling on the couch with your spouse and be forced to watch her sand her calluses or trim her toe nails. Ahhhhh, true love. No improvement.
#69 Performing Artists - These might be the most annoying of the street people with Mimes leading the pack. For me they’re even worse than the homeless. At least the homeless will go away after you give them a buck. These fools stick around and refuse to leave. No improvement.
#70 Ugly or Fugly Feet – This item is not about Corns or Calluses. It’s about just plain ugly feet. Why is it that people with the ugliest feet also insist on wearing sandals to restaurants. I’ve got a thing for feet and that’s the worst experience I could have. “Down With Ugly Feet”, now there’s your bumper sticker. No improvement.
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That leaves only thirty more items before I complete the review of my list of 100. I think I’m making good progress so far and I plan on posting the newly revised list once this review has been completed.
Mr. Mellow signing off.
I know you’ve all been waiting for my next installment of the “Things I Once Hated”. I’m only going through this endless process because I need to show my better-half just how much I’ve mellowed over the years and that living with her has had a serious calming effect on me (sarcasm off). Let’s get this going for numbers 41-55.
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#41 Organic Food – This is one of the biggest scams going. Put organic on the label of anything and you can immediately increase the price by twenty-five percent. In my opinion anything that is grown is organic. Wash off any fertilizer and insecticide and you have clean and organic food. I hate those liars who extort money from all of us under suspicious circumstances or labeling. No improvement here.
#42 Liars – refer back to #41. On a daily basis we have dozens of people who lie to us. I’ve always hated being told things that are less than true and I still do. No improvement here either.
#43 Ear Hair – I was introduced to this issue when my better-half was caught trying to trim the hair in my ears while I was napping. It’s one of her pet peeves and she’s gently forced me into adding it to my original list of one hundred. I’m still being forced to hate it or there’d be hell to pay. No improvement.
#44 Doctors – I’ve had to rethink this item because I finally met a doctor that wasn’t playing God and actually treated me like a thinking human being. I’ll concede to a 50% improvement.
#45 Large Aureoles – As I’ve stated many times before I love boobs. But large aureoles bother me for some unknown reason. I’m forced into not hating them because they’re normally attached to things I love. It’s a conundrum I tell you. No more hate for them results in a 100% improvement.
#46 Overweight Babies – Just writing about this problem pisses me off. Overfeeding a toddler or young kid is about the worst start you can give them in life. I hate the thought of it almost as much as the people responsible. No improvement.
#47 Dirty Toilets – I suppose you think I’m only talking about those disgusting restrooms found in stores and gas stations. I am but I’m also including anyone else who refuses to clean their own bathrooms. I’ve been in a few that still give me nightmares. No improvement.
#48 Stinky Cheese – I just don’t see the point of making or eating some types of stinky cheese. My grandfather was a big fan of Limburger cheese and I suspect it was only because it kept us kids away from him during our visits. No improvement and no thank you.
#49 Opossums – One of the most disgusting animals on the planet. I understand they’re great to have around to clean up road kill but they’re gross, ugly, and disgusting. No possible improvement.
#50 Roadside Death Shrines – I’m reconsidering this item out of sympathy to those people who insist on building them. I think the whole process is a waste of time and effort but I guess if it makes them feel better for all of fifteen minutes. What the hell, since I’m now a much more loving and tolerant person I can let it go (sarcasm off). 100% improvement.
#51 Extra Toes – Too creepy to even discuss and that goes for webs between the toes as well. Go join a carnival but stay away from me. No improvement.
#52 Nose Hair – Again something being pushed on me by my better-half. She’s obsessed with hating this item therefore so must I. No improvement.
#53 Jehovah Witnesses – I can’t begin to tell you how much fun I’ve had over the years messing with these people. I can’t say I actually hate them personally but I do resent anyone who tries to force their belief system on me. These folks are nothing if not persistent making them a huge target for my sometime sick sense of humor. 100% improvement.
#54 Salesmen – I’ll modify this category somewhat. I hate “high pressure” sales people. So I’ll claim a 50% improvement on this one as long as they don’t get in my face.
#55 Hot Tuna Casserole – I’ve done a total 180 on this one. I finally found someone with a recipe that I actually liked and looked forward to eating. No more hating of hot tuna dishes. 100% improvement.
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That should do it for today. Fifty-five items now completed with only forty-five more to go. Just remember all of these items are in no particular order of importance.
The last few days have been fugly and for those of you that don’t know what that means I suggest you call someone. Sleet, freezing rain, ice, snow, regular rain, high winds, and temperatures moving up and down the scale from 9 degrees to 40 degrees. A little bit of everything you could possibly imagine and none of it you would ever ask for.
The ice storm early in the week was responsible not only for icy roads but for falling tree branches covered with ice and snow. We had two small trees down in the back yard but nothing too terrible. Other folks weren’t as lucky with collapsed roofs, damaged vehicles, and damaged shrubbery.
We took a ride around the area earlier today and these photos pretty much explain how Maine feels in the winter. This first shot is of what a prosperous farm looks like in Winter.
A very solemn sight to be sure. I prefer the corn to be green and growing and the machinery in operation. The next photos were taken along the Saco river with the first looking north with the sun at my back and the second facing south with the sun in my eyes.
Regardless of the direction I’m looking that water is frigid, the cold wind was freezing my face, and I ran for my car when I was finished. The parking area near the river was covered in ice and it was purely luck I didn’t fall on my ass like I usually do. Through a bare spot in the ice I saw a reminder of Summer and of all the teenage kids who seem to congregate here. I don’t know who Jake is but an artist he aint!
I look forward to seeing more graffiti in about five months. I sure hope it’s better than this stuff.
Finally Black November, Black Friday Week, Black Friday, and Cyber Monday are over. Cyber Week will continue for three more days but OMFG. This has been the worst year I’ve ever experienced with the constant drumbeat of commercials, sales, bait and switch schemes, and alleged price drops. I’m beginning to believe that the majority of people in this country are just as stupid as I once suspected.
Working with and for retailers for years gives me an excellent perspective on things and it’s depressing as hell. Not only did retailers start earlier than ever with their push, the sales and price reductions were ridiculous. Did it ever occur to people that if they can sell most of their goods at these Black Friday prices, just how much their actual markup really is. They reduce prices by thirty percent and still seem to be making money. All that tells me is that for 51 weeks every year we are being criminally overcharged for just about everything. Does that stop the crowds from becoming near riots so they can purchase a certain doll or a certain electronic gadget? Hell no! It’s a form of insanity that brings out the absolute worst in some people as well as the constant and unrelenting pandering by the retailers. It’s maddening.
The retailers seem desperate to one-up all of their competitors to grab a little more market share. One of the commercials I can mention is the one that got me thinking along these lines. How bad does it have to be for the Kleenex company to start a competition where consumers are asked to relate an uplifting story of a personal interaction with a Kleenex tissue. Who in their right mind is going to invest their time to write a heart rendering nose-wiping story. Just unbelievable.
I harken back to the Y2K fiasco. That was the tipping point for me. I saw retailers and businesses panic millions of citizens and other businesses into spending billions of dollars for a trumped up emergency that never happened. It appears that we haven’t gotten any smarter in the intervening years.
I needed to rant a little today because this kind of idiocy makes me even crazier than usual. I see no end to it and there seems to be no concern by the buying public about how much they’re being manipulated. What more can I say? Not much that will be listened to for sure. Here’s my last word on the subject for this year so listen closely.
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(Sarcasm on)
Merry Christmas – HO! HO! HO!
Santa has requested that I help him out this year by collecting funds needed for the ever increasing costs for reindeer feed, new uniforms, and elf shoes. Just have all of your friends immediately send $10.00 to me and I’ll make sure you’re all moved directly to the top of his gift giving list. The sooner you act the better because the funds are badly needed to help Santa deal with the many holiday stresses for him and his helpers, of which I am one. I’ll be able to spend a week in Tahiti for Christmas with my family so I can be ready for next years duties. All of this holiday stress has become a dangerous health issue for us and it doesn’t seem to be covered by Obamacare. Help us out, who can’t afford a $10.00 donation for such a good cause. Santa will love you forever and you just might get that special gift you’ve always wanted next year. I should also mention that we have a payment plan in effect where your ten dollar donation can be deducted monthly from your account and delivered DIRECTLY to Santa for his expenses during the off season. Get your kids involved, they love Santa too. Santa stickers are also available for just $7.00 and can be shipped directly to your home. Just add $8.00 for shipping and handling.
HAVE A HAPPY AND GENEROUS HOLIDAY SEASON
(Sarcasm off)
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P.S. I only marked the last paragraph as Sarcasm due to MY fear that certain people would read it, react, and immediately rush to send me their $10.00. I’m just cynical enough to believe that could happen so please, DON’T SEND ANY MONEY.
Well, it’s the day after Black Friday which in fact started almost a week ago and I assume by next year will almost certainly become Black November. That way they can begin their annoying Christmas push the day after Halloween. I chose this year to not leave the house on Black Friday. I try to miss it as often as I possibly can. After more than twenty-five years of working for retail corporations and being forced to work Black Friday every year, I refuse to ever do it again.
This morning my better-half hit the ground running when she arrived in the bedroom to wake me up well before I was ready. If it isn’t the cat it’s her. She was on her third cup of coffee and talking ninety miles an hour and rattling off the list of stores we’d be visiting on our planned shopping trip. There just wasn’t enough coffee in the house to get me out of that bed quickly but eventually I stumbled to the kitchen and tried to wake up.
An hour or so later we were on our way. I really wasn’t into the shopping but I made sure I drove us through areas where good photographs might be found. It was a bright and clear sunny day and I didn’t want to waste any of it. Here are a few photo’s to help you appreciate Maine a little.
We had a great day together where my better-half wandered around looking and touching everything she saw and was able to fill the car rather easily with all sorts of treasures. We’ve just arrived home and hopefully I can settle in and relax for a few hours before the nonsense starts again tomorrow. I can expect another early wakeup call and I need a little time to come up with a reason or two why I can’t be dragged shopping once again. It’s never worked before but I can only keep trying.
‘Say hello to the horses.’
I usually find myself posting about my personal life, friends, family, and the crazy things we do, but not today. After having an up close, personal, and distasteful incident with my television I feel the need to vent. This posting will be a tad longer than most but unfortunately for all of you I have a lot to say. Bear with me for a few minutes.
What I’m about to post may piss off a few people. I’m not a card carrying member of any special interest group advocating non-violence on TV or elsewhere. I’m just a regular guy who’s concerned with viewing trends on TV and in the movies. I take my responsibilities as a citizen seriously as accorded by the Bill of Rights which gives me the right and responsibility to voice my displeasure about things I’ve been seeing.
This is the time of Obama’s dysfunctional presidency and more importantly the end of Mad Men, the end of Sons of Anarchy, and worst of all the end of Justified. What will we now do to satisfy our deep, dark, and secret needs for illicit sex, adultery, criminal activities up to and including murder and mayhem?
We may be forced to feed our disturbing need for uncontrolled violence with the next generation of those gritty, realistic, murderous, and graphic programs like Hell on Wheels. Who doesn’t want to sit at home after a hard days work to watch rape, murder, and worse on their 60” big screen HD TV. Fortunately we still have our old list of favorites to fall back on if we can’t find enough blood and guts to satisfy us. That’s what Hulu Plus and Netflix are for, don’t you know.
We now have Dexter the serial killer who spends his off-time killing other serial killers. How much more graphic killing do we really require on TV before we begin to realize that our kids and ourselves are being desensitized to all this death and destruction. Watch a few seasons of Criminal Minds where the ever increasing number of serial killers justifies the continued ridiculous story lines that include everything up to and including cannibalism. We can’t see enough blood and guts I guess and there seems to be no limits of decency any longer. Anything is acceptable as long as it keeps the ratings where they need to be and the revenues flowing.
The politicians certainly did their part by making the famous "V" chip mandatory for manufactures. Just another politically correct gimmick used to quiet the critics and maintain the status quo. Do you know anyone who’s actually ever used a "V" chip or even knew there was such a thing?
Let’s watch more of that continuous stream of murderous zombie programing that seems to be the latest fad. There you can fill your need to smash someone’s skull and splatter their brains and blood everywhere. If all else fails we’ll always have those thousands of werewolves out there to rip out some throats or tear some hearts from chests for our viewing pleasure. It’s just so damn exciting. Also, there’s nothing hotter than a graphic sex scene between a human and one of those romantic and super sexy killing machines. It’s just so freaking cool. Start shining up those pretty trophies to prepare for next years round of award shows where we applaud and award the stars and producers of this nonsense.
I guess I’m old-school enough to appreciate television when it was just entertainment. The need for censors was minimal and the programming was easily watched by everyone, children included. I liked it better when the good guys won and the bad guys lost. No gray area that required the good guys to be recovering drug addicts or alcoholics who’d been rehabilitated and continued to fight that good fight. I didn’t need the bad guys to be portrayed as good guys who were mistreated and abused throughout their entire lives giving justification to their inappropriate and criminal activities. Good is good, bad is bad, it’s that simple.
It wasn’t until “reality TV” arrived on the scene that things started really going to hell. I for one like to see bad guys pay for their sins. If it happens that they’re shot fighting with the good guys, I can live with that. What I can’t live with is the perverted need to see the slow motion bullet flying through the air, entering the body, and sending blood and guts flying in all direction.
I also refuse to watch as attempts are made to convince viewers that the good guys were at fault and shouldn’t have shot the bad guys in the first place. They should have handled him with kid gloves, shown empathy for their terrible childhood, and then set them up in a comfortable jail cell with cable TV, Internet access, a gymnasium, conjugal visits, and an attorney to file an endless list of appeals.
To me it’s all interconnected and as always a steady stream of propaganda works. I hope some of you agree but I hold little hope for that as well. As in the book 1984, when Big Brother controls the Media, we are screwed.
I’m done with this. I’ll be back to writing about my semi-boring life tomorrow.
I awoke this morning to find a beautiful sunny day with temperatures in the high fifties. After a few days of BLAH I was overjoyed. Once again my better-half was on a day-off and we grabbed our cameras and headed out to run errands and enjoy our day together.
I needed to do a little shopping for two flash drives that would help me solve my most recent computer crisis. I quickly found the drives at Target, made the purchase, and then retired to Starbucks for a coffee and to await her return. Oh, let me correct myself, not just a coffee but a Grande coffee. That’s a medium coffee from those of you normal people who haven’t let Starbucks change your approach to the English language. I try never to frequent Starbucks for only one reason, the cost. Today I had a medium coffee with milk, no latte, no whip cream, and no fancy flavoring. Just a medium cup of coffee and one snowman shaped sugar cookie. That’s six dollars I’ll never get back again and while the barista (PC BS Title) tried to soften the blow by telling me how good the cookie was, I wasn’t convinced. When she saw that her efforts weren’t working she then gave me a small card for a free game App for my IPad. Even the App sucked.
My better-half also has her own issues with Starbucks so after she arrived we quickly left that shopping center and made a stop at a nearby Dunkin Donuts for some good coffee and a breakfast sandwich. I had a medium size flavored coffee and a breakfast wrap with sausage, egg, and cheese that came to only five dollars. Eat that Starbucks!!
On the return home we passed a local horse farm where I stop occasionally to take pictures and to pet a horse or two. I found out something interesting during my visit today that I never knew before. Horses and cats seem to have a lot in common. I walked up to the fence of the corral and one of the horses spotted me and made a beeline straight for me. He walked right up to me, nuzzled my hand, and got a few pats on his nose. I had my camera out and started snapping away when he suddenly turned around and gave me his large ass to look at. He refused to turn back around and face the camera for some reason. He must have been a little annoyed that after coming right over to me I hadn’t rewarded him with a carrot, an apple, or a few sugar cubes. He was being a little pissy to say the least.
That’s the same routine my cat sometimes uses when he doesn’t get his way. He sits in the middle of the room directly in front of me with his back turned and gives me the "Big Ignore". Who knew it was a trait for horses too. I returned to the car properly chastened and we headed home.
Another day here in the paradise that is Maine.
‘From the time when we believed the government knew what the hell it was doing.’
Gray, cloudy, cold, wet, Maine, Fall, Daylight Savings Time, and OMFG. The last few days have kinda sucked in so many ways. It’s too crappy to go out to do much of anything because of the weather which left me no choice but to find things to do in and around the house. The best that I could come up was to sit and look out the picture window at 5:30 am waiting for the town workers to come by and paint the new lines on the recently paved road. I actually found myself getting a little excited.
I’m firmly of the opinion that it’s long overdue for the powers-that-be to once and for all eliminate the insanity that is Daylight Savings Time. I’ve never really heard a reasonable explanation as to why it is necessary and for every explanation put forth there are two reasons given explaining why it’s all so much BS.
‘From the time when hoe actually meant hoe.’
I’ve been hearing my whole life those famous words, "spring forward, fall back". It’s time to dispel all of the misinformation that’s been shoveled our way by a government that probably has no clue as to why it’s doing this foolishness at all. Here are a few uninteresting facts about DST that you’ve probably never heard before and might just help convince you it’s time to scrap this stupid old idea once and for all.
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Germany was the first country to implement DST on April 30, 1916 when the clocks were set forward at 11:00 pm (23:00). (When have the Germans ever been right about anything?)
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US inventor and politician Benjamin Franklin first proposed the concept of DST in 1784, but modern Daylight Saving Time first saw the light of day, in 1895 in New Zealand. (Even Ben could be wrong once in a while.)
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Some studies show that DST could lead to fewer road accidents and injuries by supplying more daylight during the hours when more people are on the roads. (Total BS)
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Other studies claim that people’s health might suffer due to DST changes. (I sure agree about this one.)
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It is claimed that DST is also used to reduce the amount of energy needed for artificial lighting during the evening hours. However, many other studies totally disagree and dispute any DST energy savings capabilities. (Again, no agreement on the possible benefits which might just mean they’re really aren’t any.)
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Today clocks are almost always set one hour back or ahead, but throughout history there have been several variations, like half adjustment (30 minutes) or double adjustment (two hours), and adjustments of 20 and 40 minutes have also been used. (More confusing answers with no agreements on any one point.)
‘Everyone seems to agree that Native Americans have the ability to understand things we don’t. This is a perfect example.’
I’ve had it explained to me my entire life that when improvements are introduced, technological or otherwise, we should fight our instincts not to change and just DO IT. There’s absolutely no consensus that DST is accomplishing anything but we still keep doing it. I realize for some of you it may seem to be fun to have your sleep cycles, bodily functions, and general well being screwed with by the government but I do not. By the time I’ve finally adjusted to this stupid hour change it’s time to switch back. Utter and complete government sponsored insanity.
STOP THE MADNESS!!!
everyuselessthing.com 